“Whoa.” He laughs, steadying me just as the elevator doors slide open.
“Thank you.” I get out, too intoxicated to feel the embarrassment I am sure would normally follow nearly falling on my face.
“You okay?” He asks, making sure that once we step into the hallway I have completely regained my balance.
“I’m good.” I immediately sense the closeness of his body, the heat radiating from him like that of a thousand suns.
Looking up hesitantly, the moment his eyes meet mine I know I’m in trouble. I don’t even realize that his hand is settled on my hip until I feel his grip tighten. When I try to look away, he urges my face back up by placing his hand gently under my chin.
He gives me no choice but to meet his gaze and when I finally cave and do just that, the moment seems to slow down around me. Suddenly I am more coherent than ever before. I can feel every single emotion flowing through me. I can see the hesitation in his eyes which turns more to want with each second that passes. His hold is slipping; I can feel it as if it’s my own. Or maybe it is my own as well.
It’s like the hallway is closing in on us. I can feel the walls shifting, threatening to crush us in their path but Luke refuses to let me break the moment. He dips his face lower, tilting my face up further as he does, causing every nerve ending in my body to tingle in anticipation.
I hold my breath as my heart thumps rapidly inside my chest, so loud that all I can hear is the collision between it and my ribcage vibrating through my ears. Luke holds my gaze as he slowly moves closer, his hand holding my hip so tightly that I couldn’t move even if I wanted to.
“Allie.” He whispers my name, his face so close to mine that I can smell the scotch on his breath, feel the heat of it against my lips.
I stand frozen, not able to speak, not able to react. I’m seeing so clearly and yet my vision seems obscured at the same time. Moments pass and with them the tension mounts, pulling at my insides, stretching me to the point that I feel like at any moment I might simply just rip apart and be lost forever.
I know only seconds have passed but each one that does feels like an eternity. Like watching a movie in slow motion, I know the moment the decision is made. I see it in Luke’s eyes, the resolution that shows through so clearly.
My breathing turn’s rapid like I can’t get air in fast enough and then it happens. At first it’s soft, a light brush of his bottom lip against mine. But then all at once everything seems to snap and his mouth crashes down on mine like his very life depends on this kiss.
His hand on my hip moves to the small of my back as he pulls my body flush against his, his other hand wrapping in the back of my hair as he deepens the kiss. He tastes of alcohol and mint, the combination an intoxicating mixture causing my mind to fill with fog as his tongue works expertly against mine, pulling from me a want I didn’t even know was possible.
Before I know it, my feet are being lifted from the ground. We bang into walls and struggle through the hotel door before I hear it slam behind us. I don’t bother to open my eyes, I am too lost in Luke’s touch, his scent, the way it feels to have his hands claw at my body like he has never wanted anything more than he wants me at this very moment.
I don’t have time to think. I know that walking away now requires a strength I simply do not possess. I need this. I want this. I don’t care what that means for tomorrow. All I know is that right here and now I’ve never wanted anything more.
I feel the soft mattress connect with my back before I even realize we’ve entered a bedroom. Luke’s kiss become more feverish, more intense, but his touch remains gentle, hesitant, like he’s afraid if he pushes too hard I might break.
I claw at his back as he settles over me, ripping at the fabric of his shirt until he finally breaks away from my lips long enough to allow me to pull it over his head. He settles back down over me, my hands immediately connecting with the smooth flesh of his back.
He grinds into me as his tongue works sweeps through my mouth, the feeling of him hard against me sending me into an almost animalist rage. All I want is to feel him, on me, inside of me, all of him. The alcohol makes me fearless and not afraid to take what I want, or maybe that’s the effect Luke has on me. Either way I feel revived, like being brought back to life after years of barely living.
My hands go to the waistband of his pants and he props up enough to allow me to quickly unbuckle them before pushing them down over his hips. He kicks at the material until he is free of it; his lips moving from my mouth to my neck as he works open the buttons that run along the side of my black cocktail dress that holds the material closed.
When he finally manages to get the last button undone, he slides the material off my shoulder, his mouth immediately dipping lower. I can’t contain the gasp that sounds from my throat as he does. His lips leave a trail of fire, lighting my skin with every inch they touch until my entire body feels ablaze.
Our bodies tangle together in one perfect formation. My hands roam his flesh, loving the ripple of muscle I feel beneath my palms. After all of our clothing has been removed and Luke is positioned above me, he pauses, looking down at me with a look that literally takes my breath away.
“You’re so beautiful.” His voice comes out shaky, his hand moving to gently trace the side of my face.
“Luke.” I barely get out as a whisper.
I can feel the doubt slipping in, the fear winning out, but just when I think it’s about to pull me under Luke catches my gaze. Like so many times before, that one action holds me completely captive, making me face what is right in front of me and admit what it is that I truly want above all else.
Wrapping my hand around the back of his neck, I pull him back down to me, his lips immediately connecting with mine. I can feel the heaviness of his want, the thickness of him as he relaxes down on top of me. Lifting slightly, I urge him forward, gasping as he slowly begins sliding inside of me. I feel the incredible pull, the size of him stretching my petite body to the point that it’s almost too much to take.
He stills once he has entered me fully, pulling back to make sure I am okay before he slowly begins moving inside of me. The feeling of being filled so completely by Luke is unlike anything I have ever experienced.
He commands my body like it is his own, reacting exactly as he tells it to, bringing me to a point of pleasure that I have never felt before. His movements become less controlled as my body adjusts to his size. Before long he is thrusting inside of me so forcefully that not one inch of my body can’t feel him.
I feel it in my toes, in the tips of my fingers, the feeling spreads through me like blood rushing through my veins, leaving no inch of my body untouched by the pleasure until it’s all I can do but fall apart below him.
Over and over again I crash, the feeling hitting me in waves as Luke continues to move inside of me. His hands grip my hips so tightly I swear I will bruise, his lips working against mine so passionately, I know they will be sore for days. Every part of my body feels the effects of his reign over me and not one part of me wants it to end.
Chapter
Fourteen
Samantha
The severe ache pounding through my brain is enough to jolt me awake. I immediately cringe, the pain in my head so intense I can’t seem to find the strength to even pull my eyes open. My mind swirls, trying to piece together a series of events that seem to flash through my memory like a slideshow being played on repeat until it stops and only one picture remains; Luke.
My eyes shoot open as I try to shake off the effects of the dream. But even as I am pulled completely into consciousness I can’t rid myself of how real it all feels. Attempting to sit up, it isn’t until I realize that I can’t move that my entire body seizes.
Propping my head slightly, I squint through the darkness, trying to piece together exactly what is going on. It doesn’t take long for the situation to sink in. Luke’s naked body draped over mine is more than enough proof that what I thought was a dream wasn’t a d
ream at all but a staggering reality.
My stomach twists violently forcing me to relax back into the pillows and take a few deep breaths. I can’t ever remember feeling so wrecked but wrecked is exactly what I am. Every inch of my body feels the effects from last night, from the alcohol still swimming in the pit of my stomach to the soreness in my limbs from the incredible night I spent in Luke’s arms.
I turn my head towards Luke who is curled on his side, his arm and leg draped over me as he sleeps peacefully next to me. His face is partially illuminated by a small sliver of light seeping in through the cracked bathroom door which gives him an almost otherworldly glow. I have a feeling he would be beautiful in any light.
I can’t resist the urge to reach out and run my hand down his face, my fingers catching on the slight stubble that runs along his jawline. This man is perfect; absolutely perfect. There is not one part of him that I don’t find myself completely drawn to. From the way his touch brings me to life, to his crystal blue eyes that seem to look through my very soul.
When I push his hair away from his forehead, putting his face is on full display, the reality of my situation seems to take hold. Dropping my hand away, the moment is broken by the panic that suddenly constricts my chest and makes it difficult to pull in enough air.
I grip the sheet below me and try to take a couple of deep breaths. How did I let this happen? The man laying next to me, the man who has completely changed my heart in the matter of one night has no idea who I really am.
The lines between Allie and Samantha are starting to become obscured by my quickly forming feelings for Luke. I thought I could do this, that I could just walk in and destroy someone else’s life and not look back, but I was naïve to think there would be no additional casualties along the way.
Honestly, I don’t think I really cared what happened to me at the end of all this. But Luke has changed everything. My priorities are starting to shift and I know that I am in too deep to approach this situation with a clear head.
Leaning up, I gently slide Luke’s arm off of me and roll to the side as carefully as I can, trying my best not to wake him. When I manage to get his leg off of mine, he shifts slightly but does not wake.
Gathering my things, I quickly slip out of Luke’s room and into my own, locking the door behind me. I have to get out of here. I have to remind myself what all this is for. Because no matter how much I want this with Luke, I know that it will never work.
I can’t be Allie Reynolds forever. The girl he thinks I am, she doesn’t exist. What will happen when all that’s left is Samantha? Will he still want me then? I think knowing the answer to that question is just as devastating as the realization that I am going to have to let Luke go.
I am here for one reason and one reason only. I can’t let myself throw in the towel when I have come so far. Ryan Scott will get what’s coming to him. I have sacrificed everything to make sure that very thing happens.
Sliding on a pair of dark jeans and a long sleeve black shirt, I grab my boots from beside the bed before quietly exiting my bedroom. Grabbing a piece of paper and pen from the door side table, I scribble Luke a quick note, knowing that as my boss he at least needs to know what I’m doing.
Dropping it on the sofa table where I know he will see it, I slide on my coat and boots before quietly slipping out of the hotel room and heading downstairs. By the time I step out into the cool morning air, the sun has just broken the horizon giving the sky an almost orange color.
I snuggle deeper into my jacket and take off down the sidewalk, having no real idea where I am going. All I know is that I need to get away.
This is where I wish I had someone, anyone, that knew the real me and what I am actually doing here. Someone I could call that could talk me off the ledge and reassure me that I am doing the right thing. I have no friends, no family, no one that cares if I live or die. I am completely alone in this world, I think that’s the scariest part of all of this and why I am so out of sorts over my night with Luke.
For the first time in a very long time I awoke feeling like there was more to life than this. That maybe love and friendship meant more than revenge. But then I remember what I’ve lost, that if not for Ryan Scott I wouldn’t be alone in the first place.
With that thought alone I can feel my resolve slip back into place. Luke is a setback, a bump in the road I didn’t see coming, but that doesn’t mean that I have to get off the road completely. There is no future for the two of us, no matter what choice I make. My path to vengeance is all I have left now and I will cling to it until my plan is complete.
Chapter
Fifteen
Luke
Visions of last night flood my sight the moment my eyes open. I take a deep breath, letting the memories seep in. Allie; the way she smelled, the way she tasted, the way she felt beneath me. I can’t wipe away the immediate smile that crosses my face.
Sitting up, I realize immediately that I am alone. Even the disappointment of Allie not being here with me is not enough to shake the warm feeling last night has left me with. Throwing back the covers, I quickly climb out of bed, sliding on my boxer briefs before making my way out of the bedroom in search of Allie.
It doesn’t take me long to realize the hotel room is empty. Not sure where she could have gone, I look around the room in search of my cell phone, not sure where it might have ended up in the chaos of last night.
Just as I turn to head back to the bedroom, I spot my phone on the table in the living room, a folded over piece of paper wedged underneath it. Pushing the phone to the side, I immediately open the paper to see Allie’s beautiful cursive scrawled across the center.
Headed out to do some sightseeing. Be back later
-Allie
Tossing the note back down, I grab my cellphone, preparing to call her. Before I can get her number dialed, the phone buzzes to life in my hand, a New York area code flashing across the screen.
“Mr. Scott.” I recognize Shane Porter’s voice immediately upon answering. “My father asked that I invite you to join us for breakfast.” He continues without waiting for a reply.
The last thing I want to do is spend the day with the Porters, especially given that I am currently preoccupied with a certain beauty I had the pleasure of sharing my bed with last night. But alas, I know that business is business and there is no way I can decline.
“That sounds great. Where can I meet you?” I answer after a short pause.
“Baristas on Eighth. Can you make it by nine?” He asks, causing me to glance up at the decorative clock above the entry way; just after eight.
“Nine I can do.” I reply.
“Perfect. We will see you then.” He says.
“See you then.” I reply, disconnecting the call.
Letting out a deep sigh, I decide to send Allie a quick text message before heading into the shower. I know it’s foolish of me to get involved with my assistant, and then there’s whatever is going on with her and Ryan to consider, but I cannot help the way this girl makes me feel.
She has completely fucking wrecked me in the absolute best way possible.
Chapter
Sixteen
Samantha
Wish I could join you. I hope you have a good day. I will be thinking of you.
I read Luke’s message for the second time before snapping my phone shut and shoving it back into the pocket of my jeans. I know I am going to have to deal with this situation head on but right now it’s not a thought I can stomach.
Crossing the main campus of NYU I look around at all the buildings, the layout, the scenery that Sean had described to me upon his arrival here all those years ago. Finding a nearby bench inside of Washington Square Park, I have a seat and watch as students cross through the area on their way to class.
Some are busy talking on their phones, some huddled in groups laughing and chatting, others have their nose so far in a book they barely look up to make sure they are going in the right direction.
I try to envision this life; what it must have felt like for Sean, what it might have felt like for me had I been dealt a different hand in life. Would I have been like all these other young adults? Would I have attended college, had friends, boyfriends even?
The thought seems so foreign to me, probably because I have never truly considered that type of life for myself. I accepted early on that this was not in the cards for me.
I don’t know how much time passes while I sit here watching the world go by. It seems like only minutes but when I finally decide to check my phone, I see that I have been here for well over an hour. Knowing I need to get a move on, I stand, stretching out my stiff legs.
Looking around the park one last time, I feel a sense of closeness to Sean that I have not felt in a very long time. Knowing that he was here once, that this was one of his favorite areas on campus, it makes me feel connected to him on a level I can’t quite explain.
I flag a cab as soon as I reach the main road, asking the middle aged man to take me to the one place I dread going but know I need to see; the place where Sean died. I don’t know exactly where it happened but I know what road it was on and that it was quite a ways outside of the city, so I ask the driver to just drive.
Miles and miles of road pass by us on our way out of the city; all the while my mind drifts to the night of Sean’s death. These roads, these surroundings, were some of the last things he saw before his life was ripped away from him far too early.
I relive the moment we found out over and over, like a nightmare I can’t escape. I can still hear my mother’s screams as she collapsed on the floor, my father doing his best to comfort her as the police officer told her over and over again how sorry he was.
I remember being too young to truly grip the reality of the situation but being old enough to feel the pain of knowing I would never see my brother again. I know I’m not the only person in the world to ever lose a loved one. I know this is a pain that others feel everyday as well. I wish I could manage the pain, the rage, the devastation I feel for what happened to my family but I can’t.
Beyond Love Lies Deceit Page 8