Always You

by Denise Grover Swank

  Matt set the booster on top of the car and lifted Toby out of her arms. “Let me help you get buckled, okay, Tob?”

  He nodded and released his hold on Anna and let Matt take him. Once he was settled on his booster seat, Matt grabbed the seat belt and pulled it over Toby’s chest.

  “What you saw in there was pretty scary, huh?” Matt asked, keeping his gaze on his task.

  “Yes,” Toby said quietly.

  Anna heard the click of the buckle before Matt lifted up his face. “It’s important that you know that your safety and Ethan’s safety are the most important thing. When you are with me, I will always make sure you are safe. Okay?”

  “Okay, Matt.”

  Tears filled Anna’s eyes. Within seconds, Matt had driven home how badly she’d screwed up everything. Phillip had never been the man that Matt was, and it was obvious he would never be. Why had she been stupid enough to fall for Phillip’s charm? How could she have been so careless that she got pregnant? Now her son was stuck with an irresponsible father who didn’t give a crap about him when he could have had someone as wonderful as Matt. But she reminded herself that Matt wouldn’t have been Toby’s father, and she couldn’t imagine her life without her son. She may have made countless errors getting to him, but she would never regret him.

  Matt watched Toby’s face for a moment longer, then got out of the car and shut the door.

  “Thank you,” Anna said in a whisper when he stopped in front of her.

  “You’re lucky to have him, Anna.”

  She tried to swallow the lump in her throat. “I know.”

  Chapter Ten

  Ashley was already seated when Anna and Toby arrived at the restaurant. She hopped out of her booth seat, letting out a happy shriek as she ran to them and pulled Anna into a hug.

  “Oh, my God!” Ashley said, squeezing her tight. “It’s really you!”

  Anna laughed. “Yeah, it’s really me.”

  Ashley leaned back and looked at Anna’s face then batted her hair. “Look at you! You cut off all your hair! You look so hot and sexy.”

  Toby, who’d been standing behind Anna, leaned to the side to look at Ashley. He tugged on the bottom of Anna’s shirt, looking up at her with wide eyes. “She said a bad word.”

  Ashley bent over at the waist until she was eye level with Toby. “Yes, I did.” Then she looked up at Anna and stage-whispered, “What did I say?”

  Anna laughed. “The S-word, but never mind.” Then she hugged her friend again. “I’ve missed you.”

  “I’ve missed you, too.” Ashley made a big production of looking on either side of Anna. “Where’s Toby? I thought you were bringing Toby.”

  Toby poked his head around Anna’s leg. “I’m Toby.”

  “Nah,” Ashley said, still looking. “You can’t be Toby. The last time I saw Toby, he was a little baby and you’re a big boy.”

  Toby giggled. “I grew up.”

  “What? No way.”

  “Yes way.”

  “Well, come on, big boy,” Ashley said, waving wildly toward the table. “Let’s get you something to eat so you can grow even more.”

  Toby giggled and climbed into the booth, staring at Ashley.

  “His accent is adorable,” Ashley said, then turned to Toby, leaning closer. “Keep the accent and you’ll have the lay-dees lining up to date you.”

  Toby scrunched up his nose. “Eww…girls.”

  Ashley pointed at him. “One day you’ll say ‘yay girls’ and I’m gonna remind you of that.”

  He giggled again.

  Ashley looked over at Anna, turning serious. “I can’t believe you’re back.”

  A lump filled Anna’s throat. Being with Ashley only brought home how few friends she had in London. “I’m not back back, Ash.”

  “But you’re here right now. That’s what matters.”

  The waiter came over to take their drink order, then before he walked away, he looked at Toby. “Have you seen the giant fish tank?”

  Toby looked at him wide-eyed. “No.”

  “Want me to show you?” the waiter asked, turning to Anna. “If that’s okay with your mom, of course.”

  “Can I?”

  Anna smiled. “Sure.” She slid out of the booth and Toby followed the waiter.

  “I can’t believe the overprotective mother I know let her son walk off with a stranger,” Ashley said in disbelief.

  Anna pointed toward the back corner. “I can see the fish tank from right here. He’s not out of my sight.”

  Ashley grinned then turned serious. “Then let’s not waste the few minutes we have talking about fish tanks. How’s your job?”

  “Good.”

  Ashley narrowed her eyes. “Try again. I know your boss is an asshole.”

  Anna twisted her mouth as she kept her gaze on her son. Ashley was right. Her boss would be back in the London office on Monday, and she wouldn’t be surprised if she got an e-mail telling her that her services were no longer needed. With everything else going on, she’d tried to put it out of her mind, but she couldn’t ignore the fact that she was likely to be jobless in a few days.

  Anna considered changing the subject, but she hadn’t voiced her fears to anyone. Who better to share them with than her best friend?

  She cringed. “I might lose my job.”

  “What?” Ashley’s mouth dropped open. “What happened?”

  Anna pushed out a huge sigh, trying to hold back her tears. “My boss hates me being here, and our bank has faced some bad publicity lately, which has caused some of our clients to transfer their accounts. I have a higher retention rate than some of my coworkers, but I’m the lone woman and…I’m here. I can’t carry my full load right now so I’m the easy pick.”

  “Oh, Anna. I’m sorry.”

  Anna forced a smile and swiped a stray tear.

  Ashley leaned closer and said with a teasing glint in her eyes, “I’m not sure if you’ve heard this yet, but we have actual jobs here in the US.”

  Anna laughed and rolled her eyes. “Ash.”

  “Sure, your job paid well, but you’ve also told me it costs a fortune to live there.”

  “I can’t move.”

  “Why not?”

  “One word. Or to be more specific, one person. My ex-husband.”

  Ashley’s brow lowered in confusion. “Phillip? I thought he disappeared from your life years ago.”

  “Maybe so, but our divorce decree says I can’t move Toby out of the country.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

  “I don’t know…Maybe because I was embarrassed over being stupid enough for marrying him in the first place.”

  “You divorced him five years ago. When was the last time he saw Toby?”

  “Three years ago. When Toby was two.”

  “And how long has it been since he paid child support, because the last time I asked, it had been years. He obviously has no interest in his son at all. Just move here. Toby will be enrolling in high school before Phillip figures it out.”

  “I can’t do that…” Anna said. “It’s a legal decree, Ashley. I’m not sure I can get away with it. What if I move here and Phillip raises a stink? I have no idea what the ramifications would be.”

  “Then find out.”

  “Ashley.”

  “Do you have an attorney?”

  She couldn’t believe she was having this conversation. Sure, it would be great to live close to Ashley, but the truth was that Ashley wasn’t here all the time. She could move anywhere in the United States and probably see her friend as much. But they weren’t talking about Anna moving to the United States. They were talking about her moving back here, to Blue Springs, and damn if her heart didn’t trip a little at the thought.

  Matt.

  No. Matt didn’t fit into any of this. If she wanted to do the right thing, she would go back to London and forget him. Or at least go back to the regret she’d lived with for the last twelve years.

  Bu
t even so, she couldn’t help thinking it would be good to be free of the hold Phillip had on her son.

  “I had an attorney, but he retired and died soon after. I tried to call him about the child support issue and then I decided receiving no child support was worth not having Phillip in our lives.”

  Ashley pulled out her phone and started typing. “I have the perfect attorney for you. She’s like a barracuda.”

  Anna made a face. “A barracuda? I don’t know.”

  Ashley’s face jerked up. “Uh, Anna, you want a barracuda. Blair Hansen is the best. Her specialty is helping women whose husbands are trying to screw them over. My sister says most of the divorce attorneys around town are scared to face her in court and almost always settle.”

  “But Phillip’s attorney is in London.”

  She resumed her typing. “Just talk to Blair, and if she thinks you need a British attorney, she’ll let you know. She can probably help you find one.”

  Anna’s phone dinged and she reached for it in her purse.

  “That’s from me,” Ashley said. “It’s Blair’s contact information. Listen, she’s hard to get into so be sure to tell her that you know Maddie Ternary’s sister. They went to high school together.”

  “Thanks. I’ll think about it.”

  Toby came running back to the table, his eyes glittering with excitement. “Mummy! Mummy! They have a shark!”

  “A shark?” Anna said. “No way! That tank doesn’t look big enough.”

  “It’s a tiny shark, but Steve says it will get bigger.”

  “That’s so cool.”

  “Can I get a shark?”

  Anna laughed. “No, you can not get a shark.”

  “Can I get a puppy? Coach Matt is getting a puppy for Ethan. Ethan showed me where he’s going to put his food and water.”

  “Well, that’s wonderful for Ethan and Matt, but how would we have a puppy in our condo back in London?”

  Toby’s brow furrowed. “Will I get to see Ethan when we move back?”

  Anna’s body tensed. “When we come back for a visit.”

  “Not every day?”

  “No, baby. Just every so often.”

  Crossing his arms across his chest, Toby scowled. “I don’t want to go back.”

  Anna put an arm around his back. “Let’s talk about it later, okay?”

  “Okay,” he said, but he didn’t look happy about it.

  “I want to hear more about Coach Matt,” Ashley said.

  And Anna wanted to tell her, but little ears were listening. “I’ll tell you, but I don’t want to send Toby off to look at the shark again.”

  Toby’s gaze jerked up. “I get to go see the shark again?”

  “No. Steve will be back soon to take our order so I want you to stick around.” She looked over at Ashley. “I think we can talk as long as we don’t get too excited, okay?”

  Ashley’s eyes bugged out. “I’m going to get excited?”

  “I don’t know if ‘excited’ is the right word, but I expect some reaction out of you.”

  Ashley rubbed her hands together. “Okay. Go on.”

  “Coach Matt is Matt Osborn.”

  She narrowed her eyes in concentration. “Matt Osborn…oh!” She covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh, my God!”

  Toby was bent over the table, coloring his kid’s meal menu. Anna darted her eyes down to him and grimaced. “Someone doesn’t know anything about any of that.”

  “What’s with the face?” Ashley asked. “Are you constipated?”

  “Oh, my God. Didn’t you get what I meant?”

  “I think a dead man could get what you meant.”

  Anna rolled her eyes. “The less he knows, the better.”

  “I get that, but how did this happen?”

  “Toby is best friends at school with Matt’s nephew and Matt is their soccer coach.”

  “And this was all just serendipity?”

  Anna hadn’t looked at it that way, and she wasn’t sure she should be feeling flutters in her stomach at the thought. “Yeah.”

  Toby glanced up at the mention of his name. “Coach Matt is awesome. He helped me kick the ball at his house today.”

  Ashley gave him an exaggerated look of surprise. “You guys went to his house?”

  Anna caught her gaze. “Toby had a playdate with Ethan.”

  Ashley watched her for a moment. “So all is forgiven?”

  “Not exactly…”

  Ashley continued to pin Anna with her eyes.

  Anna sighed. “It’s been strained, and we haven’t had a chance to talk except for social pleasantries, but I asked him to meet me for coffee on Wednesday night to discuss it.”

  Toby’s mouth dropped open. “You’re going to see Coach Matt? Can I come, too?”

  Anna plastered on a smile. “No, because Ethan will be with his grandmother. I was going to see if Auntie Ashley could hang out with you.”

  Toby frowned. “But why do you need to talk to him?”

  Why indeed? “So we can talk about soccer drills.”

  “Oh.”

  Anna glanced up at her friend. “What do you say, Auntie Ashley?”

  Ashley’s previous merriment had faded. “Do you think this is a good idea?”

  “None of this is ideal,” Anna said, choosing her words carefully. “But our current living conditions aren’t the best. My dad is even crankier than when we were kids, and all three of us are living in a very small house. Ethan is the one bright spot Toby has and now he has soccer, too.”

  “You broke Matt’s heart, Anna. Are you sure you want to open up old wounds?”

  Toby’s face jerked up. “You made Coach Matt have a heart attack?”

  Anna inwardly groaned. “No, silly. Coach Matt didn’t have a heart attack.” Then she added to throw him off track, “He was worried about Ethan’s grandmother. He thought someone broke into her house.”

  “Did someone?”

  “I don’t know.” How did she not ask? She’d been too busy getting flustered at having him so close.

  Ashley pulled out her phone and swiped a couple of times. “Hey, Toby. I have a game on here you might like, wanna try?”

  Toby’s eyes widened as he glanced up at his mother. “May I?”

  She smiled. “Sure.”

  After Ashley set up the game, and Toby was engrossed within seconds, she leaned closer and lowered her voice. “Tread lightly, Anna. He wasn’t the only one who ended up with a broken heart.”

  Anna sighed then whispered, “I know, and I’d planned to put Toby on another team, but he’s just so happy. Besides, when I suggested moving Toby to you-know-who, he said he could handle it.”

  Ashley snorted. “Well, of course he’s going to say that. He’s a big, badass man. He’s not going to admit to weakness.”

  Well, crap. Ashley was right.

  “Look, sweetie,” Ashley said, covering Anna’s hand with her own. “I know this has eaten you up since the day you turned down his proposal, but some things are just better left in the past.”

  “But what about closure?”

  Ashley snorted. “That only works in books and movies.”

  “What if I want to do it anyway? Will you watch Toby?”

  “Of course, I’d love to hang out with the little guy. I’m not telling you not to do it. Just be careful.”

  “I will. I don’t want to hurt him any more than I already have.”

  “It’s not him I’m worried about.”

  * * *

  “Let me get this straight,” Kevin said while leaning back in his patio chair, balancing a beer bottle on his knee. “You sent your nephew off with the bitch who turned you down? I know you tried to call me while I was helping Holly with a wedding, but you could have called Tyler.”

  Kevin calling Anna a bitch sent a jolt through Matt. “Don’t call her that,” he said in a low growl, despite the fact he’d called her that to himself more times than he could count.

  Tyler’s eyebrows s
hot up. “Jesus. You want her back.”

  Matt’s back straightened. “No. I didn’t say that.”

  “You didn’t have to.”

  Matt pushed out a breath of frustration. Why hadn’t he foreseen their reaction? “Look, her son is on my team. It’s good to clear the air.”

  “I don’t get it,” Kevin said. “Why would you let him on your team? When did you become a fucking martyr?”

  Tyler snorted. “You’re seriously asking him that? It’s Matt. ‘Martyr’ is practically his middle name.”

  Tyler’s statement pissed Matt off, but it wasn’t the first time he’d been called that. He cast a nervous glance at his nephew, making sure he was out of earshot. He was close enough to hear, but seemed too engrossed in passing his soccer ball back and forth with Tyler’s seventeen-year-old brother, Eric, to notice.

  “Look,” Matt said, leaning over his legs. “I had no idea who he was at first. I only knew he was Ethan’s new best friend. Besides, I’m a fucking grown-up here. I have to think of Ethan.”

  “Would it really be the end of the world if her son changed teams?” Tyler asked.

  “Ethan hasn’t been taking Abby’s absence very well. He’s been acting out lately, so if I can include his best friend on his soccer team, why not?” He took a sip of his beer and looked Kevin in the eye. “Mom’s going to ask Abby to legally give me temporary guardianship of him.”

  “Wow.” Kevin took a long pull from his bottle. “Are you sure you want to do that?”

  “I love him. You know I’ve always wanted kids. This is my shot.”

  Kevin leaned forward. “You’re only thirty-four, man. There’s still lots of time.”

  “I’m sick of waiting. I’m done putting my life on hold. I love Ethan, and I’m lucky to have him in my life.”

  “But what happens when Abby finishes school and takes him back?” Kevin asked. “What will you do then?”