by Eric Vall
All three of the guards struck the violet flames, tripped over it, and fell to the ground.
Then I threw down a portal of green in front of the first guard, and his body disappeared through the emerald glow. I opened the second portal about three-hundred feet above our position, and I could hear his terrified scream as he plummeted to his death.
In the meantime, I had two more guards to deal with. I leapt into action as I brought my sword up above my head and slammed it down into the head of the second guard. My blow wasn’t fatal, but it was enough to force him back onto his stomach. I spun around and swung at the third guard, who was now back on his feet.
He blocked my attack with his own sword and immediately retaliated with his fist. My vision went blurry for a moment as his armored gauntlet smashed into my face, and I felt the metallic taste of my own blood as it filled my mouth. While I was disoriented, the guard lashed out again with his blade, but I was able to dispel it with a flash of purple.
My head was still spinning, but I noticed there was a large oaken barrel behind the guard. I quickly threw out my hand, surrounded the barrel with green Hellfire, and yanked it toward our position.
It struck my target in the back of the legs and forced him down to his knees. Without a moment’s hesitation, I ran over to the guard, placed my open palm against his face hole, and summoned yellow Hellfire into it. The member of the Elite Guard let out a yelp as I shot a dozen or so shuriken through his brain, but then he crumbled into a heap of lifeless flesh and steel.
Just then, the falling guard’s body smashed into the ground in front of us. His body was twisted in ways a human body should never be twisted, and his horrified screams were now replaced by a weak gurgle as he choked on his own blood.
“Heads up!” Cupi exclaimed from across the way.
The next thing I knew, the succubus launched her polearm like a javelin. The weapon swished past my head in a flash, and then I heard a fleshy squish as it connected with its target.
I spun around and saw another guard on his back, the polearm sticking out of his face. I walked over to his body, yanked the weapon out of his skull with a wet pop, and then weighed it in my hands.
“You dropped this,” I joked as I tossed the polearm back to Cupi. “You should try out for the olympics.”
“I wanted to in six-hundred B.C.,” she admitted and spun the weapon around her body. “But Azazel wouldn’t allow it, of course.”
“What a shame,” I laughed. “I think some backup is in order, don’t you?”
The blonde shrugged. “Superbia did ask that we bring all of my Sisters down here.”
This was the perfect time to summon up some backup, too. The guards who had hung back were all gathered around Zepar, planning their next attack.
If we wanted one of the other succubi, I was gonna have to act fast.
I reached up and touched the flaming battle axe tattoo on my arm. White light shot from my bicep and formed a luminous figure in front of us, a figure that was much shorter than any of the other succubi. Within seconds, Gula was standing there with her battle axe in hand.
“I hear you guys might need some help?” the curvy redhead said playfully.
Zepar let out a roar of frustration and raised his sword in front of his body. The remaining eleven guards all charged at once, swords at the ready.
“I’m glad you called me,” Gula admitted. “I was starting to get bored.”
Then the succubus let out her own battle cry as she charged forward, leapt up into the air, and brought her axe down into the ground. A massive shockwave of red Hellfire sprouted from the weapon and knocked all of the guards on their asses. Gula instantly twirled around and used her momentum to smash her axe against the head of the nearest guard.
His helmet saved him from decapitation, but the blow still caused his headpiece to cave in brutally. He was going to have a concussion, at the very least.
Cupi and I charged at the remaining guards, and we started to take them out in unison. The first one was easy, I just used my Hellfire of judgement on the fucker’s helmet, and Cupi’s spear stabbed through his skull effortlessly.
We got a tad more creative with the second guard. He was already trying to stand to his feet, so I opened up a green portal beneath his body. The bastard’s entire lower body fell through, and then reappeared above our position. He stabbed his sword into the ground to prevent himself from falling through completely, but we weren’t going to be denied such a cool kill.
Cupi leapt up into the air, wrapped her arms around the dangling legs, and pulled him through. I timed it just right, and I closed the portal around the exposed part of his neck just as it passed by. Cupi came away with a headless body, and the guard’s tongue flopped out of his mouth as his head fell over onto its side on the ground.
“Hurry up you guys!” Gula called out, and we turned to see her smash in another guard’s face.
Fourteen down, six to go.
“Are you actually killing them, Sister?” Cupi asked curiously.
“Does it matter?” I shot back. “They can’t exactly fight us if they’ve got a severe head injury.”
The remaining six guards all ran at us at once while Zepar stood back and watched with his arms crossed around his chest. Even though our magic couldn’t penetrate the Elite Guards’ armor, they weren’t as difficult to take out as Cupi had made it sound.
We’d fought plenty of demons who were “immune” to our attacks before. It was all about getting creative with our attacks.
I summoned forth bronze Hellfire into both of my palms and slammed them into the ground in front of me. The entire landscape began to vibrate violently, and a few foot-wide cracks began to form in the earth.
Two of the guards stepped onto the miniature chasm, and there was a disgusting wet snap as their feet twisted in unison. They both let out a scream of pain as they fell flat on their faces and grasped at their broken ankles.
There was a clash of metal on metal as Gula’s axe collided with two more guards’ swords. The Sister of Gluttony caught both blades in the crooks of her weapon, and then she shoved them both up into the air, spun around, and smashed the right guard in the side. His breastplate crumpled as he tumbled to the side and took out his partner.
Meanwhile, Cupi was spinning her polearm around so fast it looked like the blades of a helicopter.
Both of the remaining guards were watching the acrobatic display, waiting for an opportune time to strike. The first one jabbed his sword into the chaos, and it was flung across the landscape like a metal rocket.
Cupi used this opportunity to flip her polearm around and thrust the pointed end into the unarmed guard’s face. Her weapon was still stuck in the guard’s corpse when his partner attacked, and Cupi had to flip out of the way and leave the polearm behind. The dead guard fell to his knees, but the length of the polearm kept him upright like a sort of macabre museum display.
The last remaining guard let out a growl as he ran at the succubus, but Cupi was too fast. His blows kept raining down violently, intent on killing the blonde woman, but she kept dodging and tumbling out of the way of the attacks.
The two guards with the broken ankles were now back on their feet. One of them was leaning weakly against his sword, and the other was wobbling as he tried to advance. It would have been comical if it wasn’t so pathetic.
The least I could do was give them a quick death.
I reached out with my green Hellfire and engulfed the entire wall of a nearby building with its luminous glow. Then I yanked my hands to the side, and dozens of large chunks of brimstone flew off the building. The heavy, rock-like rubble smashed down into the two guards and took them out instantly.
One of the rocks crashed into the fucker’s broken ankle, and he was forced back to the ground. Immediately after, several more rocks fell down on top of him and buried him in a pile of deadly rubble.
The other guard, the one who was leaning against his sword, got a much less painful death. As
he tried to hobble away from the incoming debris, a four foot wide rock hit him in the head and snapped his neck instantly.
Cupi and Gula were still engaging with the remaining Elite Guard, but now there was nobody standing between me and Zepar.
The mammoth of a demon cackled deeply as he took in the scene.
“You really have grown in strength, Ralston,” he mocked. “That’ll make it all the more satisfying when I separate your head from your shoulders.”
I tightened my grip on my sword, dug in my boots, and waited for Zepar to make his move. I was prepared for the demon to charge at me, to try and smash me with his shield or skewer me with his sword.
But nothing came.
Instead, he summoned green Hellfire into his hands and opened up a dozen portals behind him. Countless members of the Elite Guard began to enter through the portals, until there was nothing surrounding Zepar but red armor as far as the eye could see.
Two or three at a time we could handle, but fifty? We were gonna have to come up with a different tactic if we wanted to stand a chance.
“Guys!” I called out to my two succubi. “We need to go mobile!”
Gula knocked her opponent to the ground and then blasted him point-blank with her red Hellfire. His body made a crater in the Earth, and he groaned as he laid there, defeated.
A flash of purple started to appear from Gula’s back as her wings began to sprout.
“Don’t, Sister!” Cupi grunted as she swept the leg of her enemy.
Then the fit blonde succubus stabbed her blade into the face hole of the guard’s armor and finished him off.
“There are a lot of these guys,” I noted as I dispelled one of their swords. “If we stay here, we’ll be overwhelmed.”
“If we go airborne, they’ll be able to pick us off easier,” the succubus explained. “But we can run. We can use the crowd to our advantage!”
The three of us turned and bolted off into the festival, the Elite Guards in hot pursuit. We ran for a minute or two until we finally arrived at our original destination, the bazaar.
All around were tents full of knick-nacks, food, spices, and jewelry. People bustled throughout the marketplace, chatting with their friends and haggling over prices. It was a scene that looked like it was ripped straight out of an old globe-trotting adventure movie.
Actually, that gave me an idea.
“We use the environment,” I explained. “There’s a shit ton of stuff we can use here.”
I whipped my head around to see a villager speaking to one of the guards and pointing in our direction. We had to think fast.
Luckily, Cupi was already on it. As the wave of guards began to approach our position, the blonde succubus reached over and grabbed a handful of jewelry from a nearby vendor, much to his dismay. She hurled it up into the air, and the trinkets rained down on the marketplace like a blessing from the gods themselves.
There were gasps heard throughout the crowd before several of the villagers dashed over to try and scoop up as many diamonds and rubies as they possibly could. A few scuffles broke out, and the approaching guards were forced to defend themselves against the rabid peasants.
“Good thinking!” I exclaimed as we turned and pushed further into the market.
We ran past the food district and were halted by a group of guards who must have split off from the main group. The three of us whipped around and saw there were about a dozen more guards who had appeared behind us. We were trapped.
Devilish smiles spread across their faces as they approached our position, swords at the ready.
“Jacob!” Gula ordered and pointed to a nearby vendor. “I think I see a storm coming on.”
There, under the muted purples and reds of the tent fabric, sat a bunch of woven baskets filled to the brim with spices. I noted oregano, cloves, turmeric, cinnamon, and pepper.
Those would all do.
I threw out my right hand, summoned jade Hellfire to my palm, and shot it around the baskets. Then I lifted the baskets into the air and began to swirl them around us in a circular motion.
“Every storm needs an eye, Cupi,” I commanded the blonde.
The succubus nodded and then shot up a wave of blue freezing Hellfire all around herself, Gula, and me. At the same time, the spices started to spill from their baskets as I increased their momentum. Before we knew it, there was a miniature tornado of hot spices all around the marketplace.
I couldn’t see much through the manmade funnel, but I could hear the guards around us groan and sneeze as their senses were assaulted.
“Charge!” I yelled, and the three of us pushed forward.
The second the fuckers in front of us entered the eye of the storm, Gula lashed out with her battle axe and sent all of them flying up into the air.
We pushed through, and I released my spell on the baskets. The three of us came out of the storm directly into another large crowd that was gathered around a large stage.
The people were now staring curiously in our direction, but we didn’t have time to stop.
“Jakey!” I heard the voice of my landlord blubber excitedly. “You come to watch the show?”
I scanned the crowd for any sign of Todd, but I couldn’t see him anywhere.
“Up there,” Cupi sighed and pointed toward the stage.
Todd, still disguised as our old landlord, was up in front of the crowd with his head and hands locked into a set of stocks. In his wide body, the imp looked like an overly ripe tomato hanging onto its stem for dear life as he pulled at the stocks.
“Gula, go get him out of there,” I ordered. “Cupi and I can hold these assholes off for a little while.”
The Sister of Gluttony nodded and ran up to the stage to free Todd. Meanwhile, Cupi and I readied our weapons and prepared for the incoming assault.
The first wave of Elite Guards plowed through the fleeing crowd, stabbing and mutilating people as they advanced. If these fuckers worked for Azazel, they must have been just as twisted as the King of the Fourth Circle. The looks on their faces told me they were enjoying every second of this, and a feeling of white-hot disgust boiled up from the pit of my stomach.
I threw my hands out to the side and used my magic to grab a center pole of one of the tents. Even for a seasoned spellcaster like myself, this massive wooden beam was heavy as fuck. I released my spell with one hand and summoned forth yellow Hellfire of hatred. With a flick of my wrist, I then sent a handful of enchanted shuriken at the post. They struck the wood with a hefty thud, and my makeshift weapon was created.
Now, I had the magical equivalent of a two-by-four with nails in it. Only it was about twenty times bigger than that sort of weapon.
As soon as the guards were out of range of the civilians, I hurled the center post at them as hard as I could. The pole spun around like a twenty-foot-tall boomerang as it approached its target. Then there was a loud clank of crumpling metal as it collided with six of the guards, and they were launched through the sky violently.
The remaining guards continued to advance as I brought the deadly projectile back around, and it took out four more of the fuckers like they were nothing.
“Holy fuck, Jakey!” Todd suddenly gasped from my side. “You actually did it! The spinning beam of death I’ve always talked about!”
“You alright?” I asked the imp as I guided the weapon back into the incoming guards.
“Totally fine, bro,” he admitted. “I guess I was just heckling the dude too much. The jabroni didn’t even do a single good trick. What kind of a magician doesn’t do card tricks or disappearing acts? All he cared about was promoting Azazel and showing off his Hellfire powers. That shit’s weak sauce.”
“Glad to hear you’re okay,” I chuckled. “But we need to move before--”
Just as the words left my mouth, the center pole came to an abrupt stop. It now rested in the clawed, armored hands of Zepar. The demon closed his fist around the beam, and it shattered into a million splinters.
“
Enough with these worthless grunts,” his booming voice growled. “I want to feel your soul as it exits your body under the heel of my boot.”
Without another word, Zepar drew his massive broadsword and smashed it against the front of his shield. The resulting shockwave knocked everyone in the immediate area, including us, back on our asses. With his opponents down, Zepar thundered across the landscape, intent on ending things once and for all.
Purple Hellfire shot from Cupi and Gula’s backs as their wings sprang forth, and they rocketed up into the air.
At the same time, Todd surrounded himself with black Hellfire, lifted his bulk into the sky, and zipped over to pick me up. I felt his chubby fingers wrap around my wrist, and he pulled me out of harm's way just as Zepar’s sword smashed into the ground.
“I know, I know,” Todd sighed. “You’re usually used to gettin’ picked up by hot chicks. If it’s any consolation, this body I’m in does have pretty large tits. They may be man-titties, but they’re titties nonetheless, bro.”
“Please stop,” I groaned. “The last thing I wanted to hear today was our landlord talking about his man-tits.”
“Incoming!” Gula exclaimed from across the way.
Todd gasped in shock and changed his trajectory hastily. Just as we dove downward, Zepar’s massive, spiked shield flew past us with a gust of wind that nearly knocked us out of the sky. After it missed, it was surrounded by a shimmer of green Hellfire and returned to Zepar’s hands.
“He definitely didn’t have that power the last time we fought,” I observed aloud.
“Well, we didn’t have a lot of our powers that last time we fought, either,” Todd added.
“You’re right,” I said with a sudden flash of epiphany. “He has no idea what we’re capable of. Get me in closer, Toddster.”
The imp let out a mischievous cackle as he swooped down toward the man in the badass armor. As we descended, I used my telekinetic fire to pick up another giant wooden log.
“Gula, lumberjack maneuver!” I called out to the redheaded succubus.