Raven's Breath (The Women of Purgatory)

by Tish Thawer

  "Why has she been marked? And what exactly does it mean? Will she have to leave Purgatory?"

  Michael raised his hand in what I thought was a gesture to silence Garrett, but instead continued the motion, creating patterns in the air before us.

  "This space is now warded; we can speak freely and no one will know I'm here."

  "Okay, so why are you here? Exactly," Garrett demanded flatly.

  "The gift we bestowed on Raven has finally manifested which will be a huge help in our fight against Death," Michael replied.

  Garrett and I looked at one another, our eyes wide.

  "Why would you be fighting against Death?" Garrett asked, addressing the elephant in the room.

  Michael squinted briefly before a look of realization settled across his features. "Forgive me. I forgot I'd removed that part of your memory." He placed his sword point down on the floor and grasped the hilt. After lowering his head and muttering a few words, another bright light shone and suddenly Garrett and I were flooded with the recollection of our previous encounter with the archangel.

  When his head snapped up I blushed. The feel of his lips on mine and the memory of his hands holding me against his muscular body filled my mind.

  "Okay, that helps," Garrett quipped. "But again, why has Raven been marked and what gift are you talking about?"

  "The gift of life, of course. Raven is now able to save someone's soul in addition to retrieving it."

  "The white mist I breathed into that boy and older man. That was a gift from you?" I asked the obvious question.

  "Yes, as are the dreams. They are a way for you to see the potential lives you'll be able to save."

  I shook my head. "Wait, I'm confused. I've only been able to save two people, though in my dreams I've seen many more."

  "That's because the human soul is still bound by free will. They can only be saved if they think of others during their last memories instead of themselves," Michael explained.

  That was it; the connecting thread. Both of them had thought of others instead of reflecting on their own lives when their time had come. A very rare feat.

  "Why does that make a difference?" I asked.

  "You can be their Saving Grace, Raven, instead of their Grim Reaper, but it's still up to them to have a heart pure enough to make it happen, that is what allows our involvement to remain concealed."

  "Doesn't that go against the covenant? Heaven interfering with Death's rule," Garrett interjected.

  "Death broke the covenant when he started experimenting with the phenoms. By Raven saving a soul, it keeps it out of Death's reach and lowers the number of phenoms available to him."

  Yes! This was what we'd been waiting for. It was about time we got some answers as to what Death had been up to.

  "What is he doing with them?" I asked.

  "That, I can't tell you, I'm sorry," Michael replied.

  Dammit. "Why? Technically, I'm working for you now, so why can't you tell me the truth?"

  Michael stepped in my direction and I quivered. I couldn't stop my body from reacting to this man.

  "Because, Raven. We don't know."

  "Then how are we supposed to know what to do? How can we help if we don't know what's going on?" Garrett asked.

  "Continue to do as you always have. Perform your jobs."

  Michael reached for my hands. "Raven, utilize your dreams and save as many souls as possible. That alone will benefit our cause."

  "What am I supposed to tell him about her mark?" Garrett interrupted. "He sent me here to find out more the instant he saw it on her tonight."

  "Tell him, you have no idea why she received our mark and if he wants to question it, he can come ask us himself." Michael's tone indicated that that wouldn't be a very pleasant meeting.

  "Will you leave us with our memories, this time?" I asked.

  "Yes. Your gift is fully developed and an understanding of your dreams is important to the task." Michael pulled me towards him. "And, there's something else I'd like you to remember."

  Michael lifted me off the ground and I closed my eyes. His thick arms surrounded me as his lips fell on mine. He seemed ravenous, as if starving, and I was his first meal in days. I wound my hands through his hair, just as before, and pressed myself against his hard chest. Too soon he pulled away but kept me pinned to his body.

  "Once this is over, you truly will belong to me."

  I stood silent, tongue tied. The girl buried deep inside me declared, "I was hoping you'd say that," but the woman and Reaper I was, forced herself to stop and think. Emotions I hadn't felt since being human flowed through me. It was like I was made to be this man's mate, but how could that be? Death created me, not Heaven, but with words like destiny and cosmic intervention steamrolling through my head while the mark throbbed behind my ear, I decided to just go with it.

  We kissed again, lost in each other––completely ignoring Garrett. Damn. Who knew angels could be this hot?

  23

  It had been two weeks since Michael disappeared from my apartment. I was left wanting and frustrated, which was seriously messing with my head. I wasn't the type of girl who fell madly in love with the first guy to show interest, but Michael had a way of making me feel as if I did, in fact, already belong to him. The feel of his hands on me was seared into my brain, making it hard to focus on my daily activities.

  Garrett and I did follow his directions and continued doing our jobs. Holli and I were still sent on gathering missions even though I'd saved the lives of nineteen more people. Apparently it was going to take a lot more than that to make a difference in our battle. My normal retrievals were becoming interesting, though. I continued to visit Heaven more frequently than Hell, but I couldn't determine whether it was Michael's doing or not, since I hadn't seen nor heard from him since that oh-so-wonderful day. What was really interesting though, was when Garrett had returned to Death's castle to deliver Michael's message, he reached his chamber and found a note left on his desk, stating that Death would be gone until further notice.

  "This is bullshit! All this...'stay quiet, you're important, all will be revealed' crap. Why can't he just tell us what's going on for Christ's sake."

  Garrett eyeballed me with a raised brow. "Maybe that's exactly why they can't tell us. Perhaps what Death has been up to is affecting Heaven far more than we realize."

  I popped the tops off the two beers I'd grabbed from my fridge. I'd been spending a lot more money at the liquor store lately, since we couldn't exactly talk about this stuff at the bar. Too many ears.

  "Maybe. But honestly, Garrett. What do you think he's been doing that has Heaven in such an uproar?"

  "I'm not sure. I just know that I wish you weren't a part of it. I hate that you are now destined to play some big role in the upcoming apocalypse."

  "Excuse me? Who said anything about an apocalypse?"

  "Well, what do you think will happen when Death goes up against the angels of Heaven. I'm pretty sure Hell will become involved and then BAM...apocalypse."

  I laughed at his delivery, then crumbled at the validity of his statement. Things certainly were shaping up to become some sort of epic showdown.

  "Have you seen or talked to Death recently?" I asked.

  "No. How about you? Have you gotten any more info from Holli?"

  "I asked her what they had been up to, but she said she hadn't seen much of him lately either. Which is really weird, considering how into each other they were."

  "Everything about this is weird."

  "I agree." The room went silent as I internally debated what Holli suggested in her fit of anger. Maybe if we simply stopped gathering the phenoms all together, we could solve the problem at its source. I'd just have to figure out a way to do that and keep both our heads in the process. Suddenly, inspiration struck.

  "Garrett, has a Reaper ever chosen not to return to Purgatory after a retrieval?"

  "I don't think so, why?"

  "Just curious." I shrugged my shoulders.<
br />
  Garrett's intense stare had me concerned; I worried he'd pressure me for answers––answers I didn't have. Thankfully he didn't. Probably because down deep, he really didn't want to know.

  I hovered above the Sears Tower in Chicago, looking at the cloud of phenoms swarming below me. "What are you waiting for, Raven?" Holli called, her sword poised and ready. I, however, wasn't in such a hurry. I'd spent the past week thinking about my plan. If Holli and I refused to gather the phenoms, we'd most likely have to hide topside to avoid Death's wrath. I wasn't sure it would work, but if it did, I needed to make sure our hiding place would be somewhere we'd both enjoy spending our time...possibly eternity.

  A chill shimmied up my spine at the thought. I wasn't ready to leave my home.

  "Sorry, just thinking." I flung my ribbons in the direction of the phenoms.

  Holli raised an eyebrow and lifted her sword. "Whatcha thinking about?"

  I wasn't sure I could trust her with my entire plan, but I could test the waters. "Just about the overwhelming amount of phenoms and what would happen if we stopped gathering them, like you suggested before."

  She shook her head. "Oh. Well, I was mad at the time; anyway, I don't think it would be good if we stopped. Wouldn't the phenoms turn into ghosts and terrorize the living?"

  Dammit. She had a point.

  It was why Death had given us these perks to begin with, so we could keep Earth ghost free. And, as much as I wanted to stop him from whatever he was doing, I couldn't willingly cause a problem for others. It wasn't in my nature.

  "Yes, you're right. Just forget it."

  Holli smiled, innocently as usual, and moved onto the next cloud a few buildings away. I headed back to the portal after snagging my fill and stepped through without waiting.

  As the phenoms were sucked from my ribbons and into the blackened sky, tears spilled down my cheeks. Angry tears. Tears born of frustration. I hated trudging along, doing nothing more than going through the motions. I needed answers.

  I prepared to take flight just when Holli stepped through the portal behind me.

  "Got 'em all," she declared.

  I nodded and pushed off the ground. "See ya later, Holli."

  "Hey, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

  Ugh! I did not want to get into this with her. She could be part of the problem for all we knew, but I was so angry I couldn't hold my tongue.

  "I'm upset, Holli. I want to know what Death's been up to, and why all these phenoms are popping up out of the blue." I gestured to the sky. "Something's wrong, and no one around here seems to notice or give two shits that something's up."

  Holli lowered her head, her shoulders curling inward. "Sorry, Raven. I don't know what to say. Gathering the phenoms is my only job, that's all I know." Tears started to shine in her eyes.

  "Holli, I'm not mad at you. I don't think it's your fault, but whatever is happening isn't normal."

  She raised her head, her lips quivering. "I'd offer to ask Death what's going on for you, but I haven't seen him in weeks." She fell to her knees and buried her face in her hands.

  I lowered myself back to the ground and crouched in front of her. "Holli, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

  She lifted her head, her sad eyes shining in my face. "It's not you. Things were so wonderful when I arrived but now, it's like he's forgot all about me. The only thing I get to do is fly to the portal fields for our gathering missions and return to the castle once I'm done. I'm just so lonely."

  "Why don't you come hang out with me for a while? If Death's not around, he shouldn't notice if you're gone."

  She wiped away her tears and smiled shyly. "I actually tried to come see you the other day, but when I veered from my usual flight path, I felt a pop and suddenly appeared back in my room." She shrugged. "I guess I truly can't do anything without his permission."

  "Wow. I'm so sorry."

  "It's okay, there's nothing you can do about it."

  I was now more determined than ever to prove her wrong.

  24

  I hovered in the netherworld, poised at St. Mary's––the very hospital I'd worked at when I was alive. I'd only returned here a few times since becoming a Reaper, but every time I did, the emotions rode me hard.

  The teenage girl on the gurney was headed into surgery. I'd seen her face in my dream last night, and hoped I'd be able to save her today. Just as Dr. Taylor started to operate I felt a chill in the air. I looked over my shoulder and saw Death emerging from the shadows.

  "Hello, Raven."

  My muscles tensed. "Sir."

  The sudden break in his recent absence didn't bode well for me. Silence hung in the air as we watched my friend perform his skillful work.

  "This is where I first laid eyes on you. Did you know that?"

  "No, Sir. I didn't."

  "This hospital had just experienced a large influx of patients after a bus accident. I'd been watching my Reapers work the scene through my gazing pool when you entered the room."

  Crazy. I had never given much thought as to how or why Death had chosen me all those years ago.

  "Why did you choose me? I couldn't have been the only nurse you'd seen here that day."

  "Of course not, but you were the only one who'd already been touched by death."

  My head snapped in his direction. "What do you mean?"

  "Your medical condition, Raven. Every time you experienced an episode, a little part of you died."

  I stared at him, gauging the validity of his statement. I let my mind wander back through every episode I'd ever had. I thought about each time that I'd lowered my head, closed my eyes, and trained my breathing, and could now recall seeing a white light just before my vision had cleared and the episode had passed. I could only assume it was in those moments that a small piece of me had faded away.

  "It's a very rare thing, Raven. Dying a little without becoming an actual white-lighter. It was that connection that continued to draw me back to you. I watched you every day for months, getting a feel for the kind-hearted person you were. Then, you had your final episode and joined me."

  I didn't know what to say. Since becoming a Reaper, I prided myself on being strong, someone people feared and respected, yet here was Death telling me he'd chosen me because we had a connection and that I was a kind-hearted person. I felt exposed, vulnerable, and I didn't like it.

  "Thank you for telling me, I had no idea," I replied somberly. "What was Holli's condition? I can only assume she had also been touched by death."

  "Yes. Holli is the same as you in that way, though plagued by a different ailment." He waved his hand. "Nothing worth talking about. Now let's see...it looks like it's time for you to get back to work."

  I turned back to the operating table to see the young girl take her final breath, and froze.

  Oh shit! If Death saw me save her, everything would be ruined.

  Please think of yourself, please think of yourself.

  I stood there, sick to my stomach, hoping this girl would die so I could keep my secret. I blinked back the tears that threatened to spill. I was usually good at hiding my emotions, but right now, I was leveled.

  The girl's soul rose from her body and looked in my direction.

  I breathed a sigh of relief while Death simply smiled and disappeared.

  I flared my wings and I beamed at the girl. "Please don't fear me. I'm only here to help you find peace."

  She nodded and took my hand.

  Suddenly, something flickered in the air, catching my eye. I squinted, trying to make it out, while my inner light continued to build.

  I laughed.

  A small white feather drifted before me, landing softly at my feet.

  "Thanks for the assist," I called out, after watching the girl walk through the gates and evaporate into thin air.

  "You're very welcome."

  I spun in the direction of the deep voice and smiled. Michael was gliding down from above me with nothing on but a pair of low slung jea
ns. Tattoos marred his glistening bronze skin, and his dark, caramel-streaked hair was a sexy mess. He was glorious.

  "You needn't worry about Death discovering your gift. We are constantly monitoring the situation and will step in whenever necessary," he explained.

  I stood silent, processing his words. I should be happy that he has my back, right? Right. So why did the grateful words I'd planned to say catch in my throat? "If you've been monitoring me, why haven't I seen you before now? Are you avoiding me? Have our encounters meant nothing to you?"

  Gag. I could not believe I'd just said that but I couldn't help the way I felt. I sounded like a desperate girlfriend and that pissed me off. How was it possible I'd become so insecure after only two kisses? "Never mind. I'm outta here." I turned to storm off, hoping my anger would trigger my inner light so I could hasten my escape.

  "Please wait."

  I froze. I wasn't sure if it was his gentle tone, or the fact that I so desperately wanted to hear what he had to say, or even worse, if he had some sort of control over me now that I worked for Heaven––but stop and wait is exactly what I did.

  He pressed into my wings and slid his hands down my sides, bringing them to rest on my hips. He pulled me into him; his belt buckle hitting my lower back.

  "I'm sorry you've felt avoided. That was not my intention. I simply thought it would be easier for us to stay apart until this is over and we no longer have to hide our connection."

  "What connection? I don't even know what this is."

  He spun me around, moving his hands up to cup my face.

  "I've already told you, Raven, when this is over, you will belong to me."

  "You make it sound as if I don't have a choice."

  "Would you choose otherwise?"

  "I'm not sure. But aren't we all about free will? Heaven, Death, the Reapers? We're all so concerned about the choice that has to be made at the end of our lives, yet you make it sound as if I won't be afforded the same."

  He studied me with an intensity that almost burned, his gaze coming to rest on my lips. "I can't remove your mark, but I will let you choose when the time comes. Is that what you want to hear?"