Anathema

by Bowman, Lillian

  “And in every single group, they’ll want something in return. I don’t want to smuggle drugs or firearms or kill on command like a good lackey. It would be the same problem from the Waste all over again.”

  There’s a long silence. Then, “It doesn’t have to be like living at the Waste… Or living with our dad.”

  “Noelle—”

  “No. No, that’s what I think this is, Alexander. You have it imprinted somewhere inside your head that you have to live alone like this, as some lone wolf, just to avoid trusting the wrong people again. The Wasters had their problems, but you never gave them a chance. You went waiting for the minute they’d turn on you, so you saw treachery everywhere you looked. That’s why you turned on them.”

  “So life at the Waste was a paradise, was it? Why did you leave?”

  “No. It wasn’t a good situation. But it wasn’t as bad as you make it out to be, not then, at least. We can leave here and find some place if you’ll just open yourself up to the possibility people might have your back. You can learn to trust.”

  There’s a silence. Then, “Even now,” Alexander says softly, “all these years later, I can’t remember seeing it coming. He went to our games. He took me to Taekwondo. Even after… Even after Mom died, he kept things in order. I thought I had a great dad and I didn’t even see it. All that time, what he was doing to you…”

  “We have to move on. If we don’t, he wins.”

  “I’ll never forgive him,” Alexander says. “I’m glad he’s dead. I wish I could have killed him for you.”

  “No, you don’t. That’s what bothers you. You’re not doing me some wrong if you still… if you miss him. Sometimes… It’s messed up. Sometimes I do, too. Just, um, like when we were a normal family. And when he’d take us to get sundaes when Mom was sick.” Her voice hitches.

  The silence is longer this time, far more tense.

  “I’m glad you have a friend here, at least,” Noelle says after a while, her tone lighter. “Kat’s sweet. You’ve been protecting her. I think it’s good for you.”

  “I’d protect you, too, if you’d let me.”

  “You’re never going to get it through your head that I don’t need your help. I’m not a kid anymore. I’ve killed people. A lot of people.”

  “Haven’t we all?”

  “Not her.”

  “No, not her.”

  And with those words, I feel the weight of their gazes on me.

  “Why wouldn’t you let her write the article?” Noelle asks him. “Don’t you understand what an amazing thing it would be if you ever got exonerated?”

  “You’re dreaming.”

  “Alexander, it’s happened to other people—”

  “No. As long as you’re an anathema, I’ll be here with you.”

  “Giving up your life doesn’t fix mine! It’s not absolution or penitence. The best thing you can do for me is save yourself!”

  His voice grows as diamond hard as hers. “You’re not the only one who gets to make these decisions. Drop it.”

  This time, the silence does not end.

  Hours later, I sit alone in the school computer lab. Noelle is asleep. Alexander slept for a bit and then woke up before even I did. He set up an anonymizer on a computer for me before retreating to the gym. Apparently, he’s something of an insomniac. Most nights, he apparently takes advantage of the near-empty school to work out in the gym. I snuck a look at him while on a bathroom break, and glimpsed him bathed in sweat, brutalizing a punching bag like it had wronged him somehow.

  I e-mail my parents to let them know I’m okay, though I can’t tell them where I am. They’d be astounded to find out I’m less than ten minutes away from them. The plan is for me to hide in the basement tomorrow, unseen by anyone.

  I can’t resist checking to see what hunting guilds have come to town.

  Big mistake.

  My bounty is up to $83,000. My new notoriety has created a stir on the hunting forums. One link leads me to the leader of Death’s Disciples. It’s Trent ‘the Wolfman’ Savage’s Twitter feed. Some of the recent posts are relatively harmless.

  TheWolfman @savagekiller2h

  RT @bountymagazine Tuesday’s issue: Legendary hunter Wolfman Savage weighs in with Fantasy Hunting Guild advice. Who to trade, draft, & drop

  TheWolfman @savagekiller5h

  This: RT @Nike That anathema is yours. Air Savages: for the hunter willing to run, jump and charge a mile farther for American justice.

  Others aren’t.

  TheWolfman @savagekiller8h

  Guess the # of times a HI-4 says please when begging 4 mercy. Best guess wins autographed copy of my bio CALL TO SAVAGERY. Reply w #savage

  That last one chills me. I think I know the HI-4 he’s talking about. Frightened, I check his latest YouTube video. Sure enough, I find myself streaming a video with the grinning face from my nightmares.

  “… message to you, Kathryn Grant: we’re coming.” He flashes an ugly grin. “I hope you’re worth the drive.”

  Goosebumps prickle up my spine. He tore that one man’s heart right from his chest. I saw another clip of him on a TV game show where he drove a sledgehammer up through a woman’s jaw.

  Death’s Disciples are a notorious guild. I’ve seen horrifying things about its members. They are rigorously screened for strong antisocial tendencies. The only people who make it into the guild are the twisted psychopaths who’d be condemned as serial killers in other societies. Some of them are actual serial killers from other countries. They immigrate to the United States just to join Wolfman Savage’s guild. Our country gives them a legal outlet for their need to kill. That’s one purpose of anathemas—to give the worst of society targets to destroy with impunity so they’ll leave law-abiding citizens in peace.

  I am bathed in a cold sweat. This is my nightmare. I dreaded Wolfman Savage above all when I became an anathema. He was the very image of the terrifying sadistic hunter to me and now he knows my name. He knows my name. He’s coming to my town.

  A hand reaches past me. I almost jump out of my skin, but Alexander doesn’t seem to notice. He’s freshly showered. He smells of soap and shampoo and safety. He takes the mouse and closes the window, making Wolfman Savage’s brutal grin disappear. “He’s just a hunter like any other.”

  I clutch myself, unable to move from this spot. Horror rages inside me. “He’s going to do something terrible to me. He doesn’t just kill people, Alexander. He eats parts of them.”

  He settles in the chair beside mine in the shadowy computer lab. For a moment, it’s like we’re in class together. Strands of his black hair are still wet. They cling to his forehead.

  Alexander reaches out to brush my hair out of my eyes. Strange how something so simple sends a bolt of exhilaration through me. “Kathryn, I won’t let him get you.”

  “I wish I had some way to repay you for everything you’ve done for me.” I draw a shaky breath. “I’ve been thinking ever since I heard about your leverage. Um, the jump drive. And if it comes down to it, I know Liam and the others might not back off. I understand if you just choose to protect Noelle, not me.”

  His black brows sweep up against his bronzed skin. “What?”

  “You only get to use it once. If Liam and the others come back for me, I won’t take it personally if—”

  “Don’t be ridiculous.” His tone is unyielding, hard. “I won’t let them get you.”

  “But you only have one sister.”

  His warm fingers touch my chin, tilt my eyes up to his. His palm is rough with calluses, his eyes so blue in the light spilling from the nearby screen. “There’s only one of you.”

  My pulse is pounding so hard, I’m sure he can feel it. His touch makes my skin tingle. I remember seeing him slamming that punching bag. Kicking it. There’s so much power in his body yet his touch on my skin is gentle like I am something delicate and infinitely priceless to him.

  The pad of his thumb traces my cheek, tenderness in his gaze. “You re
ally don’t belong in this life,” he says softly. His gaze feels like a delicate touch dancing over my skin. His lips are so close, his blue eyes framed by slanted black brows that lend a sharp intensity to his gaze. “You’re like some gentle dove and the rest of us are hawks. I hate to think of what’s going to happen to you.”

  “I’m not weak.”

  “I know that. I’ve seen how strong you are.” There’s frank admiration in his voice. His lips are full and soft, and his breath tickles lightly over my cheek. “You need to know you’ll never be alone in this, Kathryn.”

  My fingers reach up to brush across the hard expanse of his forearm. The blood feels like it’s humming through my veins in pleasure, an excited electricity prickling through my awareness at his proximity. In the silence of the room, the only sound is our breathing.

  Something nudges into my thoughts then. “You’ve been alone, though, haven’t you?”

  “My sister—”

  “Hasn’t been here with you.” My gaze leaps up to his. I look around the shadowy computer lab. The school is so dim and lonely at night. The emptiness settles in my chest like an ache. “This is how you’ve lived the last few years. By yourself.”

  His lips soften. “You get used to it.”

  “But you’re not alone, either. Not if you don’t want to be. I’ll be here, too.”

  For a split second, I am so sure he’s going to kiss me. Excitement and nervousness electrify my veins and then the door to the lap pops open, light bursting into the room.

  “Hey guys,” Noelle says. She’s stifling a yawn. “It’s almost four. She’d better get downstairs and out of sight.”

  Knocking.

  At some point while isolated in Alexander’s room, I dropped back into a deep sleep. Now I’m groggy and disoriented. When I sit up, I see that Alexander’s neatly folded his sheets. Noelle’s abandoned hers in a tangled heap. And someone is still knocking on the door.

  My gaze flies to the door. Someone is jiggling the handle. My stomach coils into anxious knots. Alexander, Noelle and I agreed on a knock to alert each other to the fact that we wanted in. Noelle is at liberty to wander the school because nobody here would recognize her. Alexander left for class early this morning.

  I’m supposed to stay concealed here. No one realizes I’m still in town, much less hiding at my own school

  But now someone wants in. They’ll see me. They’ll find out I’m here. They’ll learn Alexander has been living here.

  I draw my sheets up around me, holding my breath. There’s a clink. Someone is tinkering with the lock. I find my feet, my heart pounding.

  Abruptly the door swings open, and the locksmith straightens up. Behind him is our school principal—and the mayor.

  Mayor Alton offers me a cold smile. “Why, Kathryn. What a surprise to see you here. Students aren’t supposed to be skipping class.” She steps inside, and glances around. “Much less living at school.”

  CHAPTER FORTY-THREE

  I’m still reeling as I sit in the Principal’s office minutes later. There were a few startled glances at me as I trudged down the hallway, flanked by the mayor and Principal Williams. Now Principal Williams argues with Mayor Alton.

  “Well, given the circumstances…”

  “Circumstances, nothing. It’s against the law for a student to remain on the premises after school hours. I’d also advise you fire your night watchman. Clearly he’s sleeping on the job.”

  The two women face each other across the desk. Mayor Alton came all the way to the school, claiming to have been tipped off about my presence here.

  How did Mayor Alton find out I was at the school? How did she know?

  I rack my brain. The Wasters were the only ones who knew I came here. Could they have tipped her off? I immediately dismiss the possibility. If I’m driven from the school and caught by Wolfman Savage, then the scenario Liam feared would come true: I could get forced to tell the truth about the massacre. The truth about the Wasters and their firearms. That would lead to problems for them. Liam was planning to kill me just to stop that from happening, so he couldn’t have tipped anyone off. So how did Mayor Alton know where to find me?

  The Principal gently smiles at me, and informs me regretfully that I’ll have to clear out as soon as school hours end.

  “I’ll be killed,” I tell her. Principal Williams shifts uncomfortably in her seat.

  “I should call your parents. They must be wondering where you are.” She reaches for the phone.

  “No, don’t!” I say quickly.

  My parents will come home tonight to messages telling them I’m at the school. Then I know what happens: they’ll come here and try to help me. They’ll attack hunters themselves and become anathemas before letting these people kill me.

  I won’t let that happen to them. Whatever happens to me tonight, it’s not going to destroy their lives, too. They can live if I die. They won’t live if they lose citizenship.

  Principal Williams looks torn, but she doesn’t pick up the phone. “Since you’re here, you can feel free to attend class. You can even stay for the school dance tonight.”

  “Ah, yes,” Mayor Alton chimes in sweetly. “The proceeds are going to the families affected by the Shelter Valley massacre, aren’t they?”

  “The Cordoba Bay Massacre,” I correct her.

  They both look at me.

  “It took place in Cordoba Bay. Not Shelter Valley.” My gaze flashes up to hers. “I’ll be sure to tell everyone before I die. I saw it happen, after all. I wonder how that will look at the polls when it gets out?”

  Mayor Alton’s face hardens. “If you live long enough to spread the word.”

  I flinch.

  Satisfaction flickers over her face. She knows she scored a hit. “I believe we’re done here. Do enjoy your dance tonight.”

  “Conrad and I will,” I reply venomously, enjoying the way the thin line of her lips goes thinner.

  But it’s a fleeting victory. Mayor Alton has won and she knows it. I can’t even needle her so much about Conrad now that I’m likely to die in a few hours. Worse still, she led them right to the room where Alexander’s been living. He and Noelle will have to clear out at the end of the school day, too.

  All three of us are going to be killed.

  Amanda is horrified I’m back in school. Almost as horrified as she is about me bringing Alexander and Noelle to our backstage hangout place.

  “Will you relax?” Noelle says to her. “The three of us will be dead, come tomorrow, so nobody will know about your place.”

  Amanda folds her arms. “That is not funny.”

  “It’s the truth,” Noelle says, leaning against the curtains beneath the light switches.

  Amanda eyes them distrustfully, creeping closer to me. I just feel sick and tired, my head throbbing dully. “So you didn’t even make it out of town,” she says.

  I shake my head. “I’d be dead now if Noelle hadn’t saved me. These, uh, anathemas had other plans for me. They were going to storm my house if I hadn’t come out.”

  Amanda blows out a breath. “So what now? You guys just give up? Resign yourselves to death?”

  Noelle leers at her. “What did you see outside when you looked five minutes ago, Princess?”

  “Hunters.”

  “Too many to get through. But the worst part is yet to come.”

  Amanda’s eyes narrow. “And why is that?”

  Noelle’s lips twist. “Because it’s when they leave that we need to be afraid.” She looks at me. “Remember what I said about the bad ones flying in? You’ll know they’re here when the amateurs clear out.”

  I shudder. Amanda just frowns. “That makes no sense. Why would they leave because professional hunters are here?”

  Noelle gestures for me to take it from here, so I explain what Noelle told me—about Death’s Disciples being a menace to other hunters as well as anathemas.

  Amanda paces restlessly, deep in thought. Suddenly she whirls around, her eyes a
light. “Guys! I have a brilliant idea.”

  “What?” I ask.

  “Oh, you’re all going to love me so much for this one,” Amanda exults. She pulls her cell phone out of her purse. “We film them.”

  “Killing us?” Noelle says. “They’ll film that themselves.”

  “I don’t expect we’ll be around watching it in five years for the happy memories,” Alexander adds drolly.

  “No!” Amanda cries. “If it’s like you said and they kill competing hunters, then we film them killing another hunter. Fellow citizens. It’s illegal. Then we blackmail them so they back off.” She raises her eyebrows. “It’s perfect.”

  “Except we have to catch them in act of killing another hunter,” Alexander points out. “That’s not something they do every single day, and certainly not in the open where people can see it.”

  Amanda ponders that, tapping her hands restlessly on her thigh. I’m glad one of us is full of ideas and feeling hopeful. I feel drained, empty. Noelle’s shoulder is pressed to Alexander’s. She looks deflated, too. For his part, Alexander is watchful, as usual. His blue eyes catch mine. I gaze back, wondering what he’s thinking. My memory flickers back to the computer lab, where I swore he was about to kiss me. For a fleeting second, his eyes dip to my lips like he’s thinking of it, too, and then Amanda speaks.

  “Okay, idea two,” she declares. “A setup. Kat, you go out and give them a look at your clothes. Then come back here. I’ll put on your clothes. Oh, and a hat, too, so they can’t see my hair. Then I walk outside. They’ll think I’m you and attack me, but whoops—it’s me, a citizen! They’ve injured me and it’s on camera.” She waves her cell phone again. “Then they get told to back off or I press charges, so voila. They back off.”

  Noelle gapes at her. “That is the most idiotic idea I’ve ever heard.”

  Alexander hides his smile behind a palm.

  “Why?” Amanda demands, propping a hand on her hip.

  “Look at you two,” she says, gesturing between us. “You’re six inches taller than her. You have different builds. You look nothing alike. Hunters aren’t that stupid.”