The Becoming

by Jessica Meigs

  They stared at each other again after Cade finished her spiel. Ethan didn’t like what she had told him at all. He fought back a scowl as he slid his own arms up to cross over his chest again. His expression was cold as he watched her. When Ethan finally spoke, some of that frigidity filtered into his voice, and it was almost enough to make Cade shiver.

  “I don’t trust them,” Ethan admitted. “You can hardly blame me for that. I don’t trust anyone out there. Look at the situation we’re living in! I barely tolerate Brandt being here, but at least he has a useful skill set, and he’s not totally incapable of helping out with keeping the three of us alive. Those two? I don’t know a thing about them, and I don’t trust them any further than I could throw them.” He shook his head and ran a hand through his blond hair, not looking directly at her for a moment. “I don’t want them here,” he continued. “With two more people to deal with, the length of time our supplies will last is cut in half.”

  Cade stared at him incredulously, her eyes wide in surprise. “You can’t be serious,” she said. “You think like that?”

  “Of course I’m serious,” Ethan argued. “I’m looking at this from a practical standpoint, Cade. We can’t afford to take in every single survivor that comes in our general direction. I won’t risk any of us dying because of some stranger interjecting himself into our situation and taking up our supplies.” He blew out a breath and added, “They need to go.”

  Cade shook her head. “Not just no, but hell no,” she said. “We are not forcing those men back out onto the street.”

  “Then I’m going back to Memphis,” Ethan said decisively. His tone hinted at a finality that Cade sensed she was never going to be able to argue out of him. “And I’m going to look for Anna. You can come with me if you want, or you can stay here and take your chances with Brandt and those other two men.”

  “You can’t possibly make me choose—”

  Ethan cut her off before she could finish her sentence. “Cade. Which is it going to be?”

  Cade looked up at him and bit her lip nearly hard enough to break the skin. She shook her head slowly as she tried to wrap her mind around what he had asked her to do.

  Chapter 14

  Theo Carter knelt on the floor beside the coffee table, where he had been since he and Gray were admitted into the safe house, mechanically repacking his medical supplies back into his blue canvas bag. He wasn’t sure what to think of his new companions. The big man who had identified himself as Brandt seemed friendly enough; after all, he had been the one who had gotten them inside, seemingly against the wishes of his friends. The woman named Cade was distant, and Ethan appeared to be an absolute bastard. Theo made a mental note not to engage with Ethan if it could be helped.

  Theo shook his shaggy blond hair back from his eyes and looked around the room curiously. Brandt stood several feet away, halfway between the coffee table and the kitchen door, his arms crossed over his chest. Brandt eyed the closed kitchen door, where Theo could just barely make out the sound of raised voices. He should have been attempting to make conversation with the man responsible for his and Gray’s rescue, but Brandt didn’t seem too interested in talking at the moment. So instead, Theo took a few minutes to examine his surroundings.

  The living room was much dimmer than the brightening day outside, and it took Theo a moment to realize that it was because the windows were covered up and, in some cases, boarded over. There wasn’t much furniture left in the room; most of it had been used as makeshift boards for the windows. There was a plaid couch pushed against the wall behind Theo, and the coffee table on which Gray sat was shoved against it, leaving no space between the two pieces of furniture and hinting that the couch was little used. The room was sparsely lit by a single battery-operated camping lantern that sat on the opposite end of the coffee table from Gray and Theo. The light it threw out cast strange shadows into the corners, making the entire room look dingy and creepy, but it was certainly nowhere near as scary as being outside with the infected.

  Theo glanced at Brandt after he had finished his examination of the room. Brandt still stared intently at the closed kitchen door, but the voices on the other side had fallen silent. Theo wondered what exactly was going on; this obviously wasn’t a cohesive group, as it had appeared to be on first glance. He cleared his throat to get Brandt’s attention; Brandt looked at him, and Theo couldn’t read the tall man’s eyes in the dim lighting. “Ah, is there a problem?” Theo asked delicately as he nodded toward the kitchen door.

  “Maybe,” Brandt said evasively, shifting his weight from one leg to the other. “Ethan has been acting like an idiot for the past couple of weeks. I think Cade’s in there trying to straighten him out.” Brandt sighed heavily, suddenly sounding weary. “He’s not normally like … well, he doesn’t normally threaten to kick people out like he did with you guys. As far as I know, anyway. Cade’s always said that he’s really into helping people, so I’m not going to claim I get why he’s acting that way.” He glanced at the door one more time and then took a step toward Theo and Gray. “You two are the first uninfected people we’ve seen in nearly a month.”

  Theo nodded understandingly as Gray offered him the inhaler back. Theo clipped the red plastic cap back onto the mouthpiece before returning it to its pocket in the trauma bag beside him. He finished packing the bag as Gray spoke up.

  “You’re the first people we’ve seen too, besides each other.” Gray’s voice was hoarse and strained as he spoke. Theo put a hand on Gray’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze as the younger man continued. “We’ve been hiding out in a house about two blocks from here, but we were starting to run low on water. Then the infected found us and we had to get moving again.”

  “Where are you two originally from?” Brandt asked, starting to get drawn into a conversation despite his obvious interest in the argument that had started in the kitchen once more.

  “Plantersville,” Theo answered. “It’s a bit southeast of here. Maybe five miles? Something like that, anyway. It was a suburb of Tupelo, but the fires …” He choked as he remembered the events following the city’s fall, and he stopped talking as he tried to swallow the awful feeling creeping up from his gut.

  “The downtown area burned,” Gray clarified softly. He looked down at his lap as he clenched his fists, and Theo saw his knuckles turn white. “It was some sort of accident. There wasn’t a fire department left to put any of the fires out, and it wasn’t safe enough to be outdoors trying to do it ourselves. A lot of the buildings were too close together, and so much of them burned that even those of us who weren’t infected had problems getting out of there. We … well, me and Theo got lucky.”

  Brandt picked up a dining chair that was pushed against one of the walls. He carried it over and set it on the hardwood floor near Gray and Theo with a soft thump. He eased himself down into it as if he were tired and sore. He rested his elbows on his thighs and let his hands hang loosely between his knees, his back hunched over as he studied them one at a time. When Brandt finally spoke, it was to ask a question that Theo had been anticipating but didn’t look forward to answering. “So what were you two doing when the Michaluk Virus got to you?”

  Theo blew out his breath to steady his nerves and looked up at Gray. Gray’s eyes met Theo’s, and Gray gave him a tight smile. “I was at work when I realized something was messed up,” Theo said. “We had gotten a call for an MVA out on Highway 6, and the patient we picked up was acting out of his mind. He kept trying to attack me, and some of the officers on the scene helped me tie him to the stretcher with some restraints. I thought at first that maybe it was a head injury that he’d sustained during the wreck, maybe an altered mental status or something. We were running lights to the hospital when he actually broke the restraints and grabbed me. If it weren’t for my driver getting me the hell out of there … well, I probably wouldn’t be sitting here today.”

  “What happened to your driver?” Brandt asked.

  “Jonathan … he
didn’t make it,” Theo said, not looking up at Brandt.

  It was a statement that required no elaboration. Everyone still alive had lost someone at some point, whether it was a friend or family member or lover, and “didn’t make it” had become a catch-all phrase for all of the bad things that could happen to a person after the world went to hell. And Theo was personally acquainted with several of the bad things that could happen—not the least of which was the Michaluk Virus itself.

  The silence that followed Theo’s words wasn’t uncomfortable for Theo, but Gray started to get fidgety. Theo wasn’t the only one who noticed him shifting his weight on the coffee table. Brandt studied Gray for a moment before he asked, “So what’s your story?”

  “Almost the same as Theo’s,” Gray said, his voice still hoarse. He paused to clear his throat. “Except mine mostly involved hiding out in my apartment for two days. Then Theo showed up with a load of stolen medical supplies in a bag, looking like he’d been run over by a truck. We’ve been hiding out ever since, just sort of hopping between different houses and trying to stay alive.”

  The renewed silence wasn’t as heavy as the previous one had been. Brandt stared at Theo intently, his eyes focused on Theo’s face as he tried to assess the man’s mood. Before Brandt could ask any more questions, however, the kitchen door slammed open. Cade stormed out and made a beeline for the staircase. Her dark hair bounced off her shoulders as she charged up the stairs, the scowl on her face making her appear entirely unapproachable. Theo recoiled as he caught a glimpse of the look in her eyes, and he wasn’t stupid enough to say anything to her.

  Brandt, so it seemed, wasn’t quite as smart. He stood up abruptly and took two steps toward Cade as her feet struck the stairs. “Cade, what is it? What’s happened?” he asked.

  The woman stopped halfway up the stairs and held out a hand to Brandt, palm facing out, signaling for him to stop. She shook her head, not looking down at him as she braced a foot against the next step up the stairs. “No, Brandt. Not now.”

  Brandt looked lost as he held both hands out to his sides in a cross between a defensive gesture and a bewildered one. But he didn’t speak as Cade continued to climb the stairs, her footfalls heavy on each step. The three men watched in silence as she climbed, and moments after she disappeared into the darker second level, a door slammed somewhere above their heads. Gray and Theo winced simultaneously as the sound echoed throughout the house, and they frowned at each other.

  “I’m not sure I’m comfortable with how … loud these people are,” Theo muttered to Gray. Theo was reluctant to let Brandt hear, as if he might offend Brandt and get them thrown back out onto the street. Theo supposed that social niceties died hard, but he really wouldn’t have put it past anyone to kick out people considered unnecessary. It was something he would have thought about doing if someone became a drag on his or Gray’s potential survival.

  “I don’t like it either, but what choice do we have at this point?” Gray said in an equally hushed voice. His blue eyes flickered warily at the ceiling as the sound of pacing footsteps greeted their ears. “If we don’t stick with them, I don’t think we’re going to make it, Theo. We don’t have the supplies or the knowledge. Not on the level they do.”

  Theo fell quiet as he contemplated Gray’s words. Gray was right, of course. Gray was right about so much lately, so deep and thoughtful compared to the way he’d been a mere month and a half prior. He’d matured so drastically in the past month—acting at least ten years older than his current twenty-two—that Theo often wondered where his brother had gone. Sometimes, Theo suspected that Gray and his wise words were the only things keeping him grounded throughout all the devastation they’d witnessed in such a short time.

  But as Theo watched Brandt begin his own pacing in time with the footsteps above their heads, and as he watched Brandt shoot worried, nervous glances toward the closed kitchen doors, doubts began to surface. He wasn’t sure if staying with these three people was the right thing to do; he wasn’t sure if what he and Gray had to offer would be enough for these people in the face of the skills they themselves possessed.

  Most of all, Theo worried that this seemingly dysfunctional group of warriors might lead to his and his brother’s deaths faster than if they were to stick it out on their own.

  Chapter 15

  Ethan sat at the wooden table in the dark kitchen, fists clenched on the surface before him. His green eyes stared vacantly across the room as he tried to contain his anger. It was irrational, really, how enraged he was at Cade. Ethan had thought that Cade, of all people still breathing, would have understood. He had thought that she would push the issue, that she wouldn’t allow him to go alone. He had thought that he could rely on Cade to do what he needed her to do.

  Instead, when Ethan had pushed, Cade had only pushed back. And then she had chosen three virtual strangers over the man who’d been her best friend for seven years. It blew Ethan’s mind when Cade stood there with her arms crossed, when she stared him down and said, her voice calm but edged with anger, a simple “No.”

  But her refusal hadn’t changed Ethan’s mind. Not in the slightest. Now, more than ever, he was determined to get back to Memphis, to search for his wife and find out, once and for all, exactly what had happened to her when everything had fallen apart the month before. He at least owed her that much.

  Ethan was still mulling this over when the kitchen door swung open and Brandt strode into the room. Ethan fought the urge to roll his eyes as Brandt walked right up to him and leaned over. He placed the knuckles of both hands on the table’s scratched surface and got as close to Ethan as he dared. “What do you want, Brandt?” Ethan asked impatiently. He didn’t have time for Brandt’s show of machismo. He had more important things to do now that he could feel his nerves easing off of their anger. He had supplies to pack and routes to plan, and he didn’t have space in his day planner for Brandt’s temper.

  “What did you do to Cade?” Brandt asked. He kept his voice level and quiet, though Ethan could tell that it took some effort for him to do so. Ethan glanced toward the closed kitchen door, behind which the two men—the two strangers—still presumably remained.

  “Did you leave them alone out there?” Ethan demanded.

  “So what if I did?”

  “They could be, I don’t know, robbing us fucking blind of all our supplies while you’re in here picking a fight!” Ethan snapped. He rose half out of his chair as he spoke, his hands braced against the table between them.

  “And what purpose would it serve them to take weapons and gear they can’t even use or carry?” Brandt replied. He shook his head as he stood up across from Ethan. “They want to stay, and they’re staying if I have anything to say about it. They could be useful, especially Theo. He’s a paramedic, for Christ’s sake. And you never answered my question,” Brandt added, switching gears.

  “What question?” Ethan asked. He sat back down heavily in his chair and balled his hands into fists again. He was stalling, and he was well aware of it. But he didn’t want to explain himself again, especially not to Brandt of all people. Talking to Cade about his plans was one thing, but Brandt? That was another issue altogether, and Ethan’s plans were none of Brandt’s business anyway.

  “What did you do to Cade?” Brandt repeated in a measured tone. It was obvious to Ethan that it was taking everything in Brandt to not reach across the table and throttle him.

  “I didn’t do anything to Cade,” Ethan said defensively. He eyed Brandt’s large hands as they gripped the edge of the table. He edged his chair back a few inches from the table as the other man leaned forward suddenly. Ethan didn’t care if the action made him look like a coward; Brandt was larger than he, and he wasn’t stupid enough to put himself in reach of Brandt’s muscular arms if he could help it.

  “Do not fucking lie to me, Bennett,” Brandt snapped. Anger flared up in Brandt’s eyes like a fire burning too hotly, and Ethan swallowed hard. He’d never seen Brandt angry. It wasn�
��t a pleasant sight. “I know you did something or said something to piss her off. I might have only known you two for a month, but I figured out pretty quick what Cade looks like when you’ve done something that makes her want to kill you. And she was more pissed off than I’ve ever seen her in the past month. What did you do?”

  Ethan found himself unable to meet Brandt’s eyes. He tore his gaze away from the other man’s face and shifted it back down to the kitchen table. The two men sat in silence as Ethan studied the scratches on the surface, tracing one idly with his finger and wondering how it had gotten there. The family that had once inhabited the house in which they now hid had been long gone by the time they’d gotten there, and Ethan still wondered what happened to them. Just like he wondered what happened to Anna. He wondered if she had made it out of the hospital okay, if Lisa had been wrong. He wondered if she’d returned to their home and found him gone, if she was even now hiding out in their house waiting to see if he would return.

  Or if she was nowhere to be found.

  Ethan blew out his breath as he sensed Brandt’s eyes still on him. The younger man was patiently waiting on his answer, and it didn’t seem like he was going to give up anytime soon. Despite Ethan’s reluctance to tell Brandt anything, he sighed again and started to talk.

  “I want to go back to Memphis,” Ethan started. “I need to go find my wife. I have to know what happened, because I can’t just … sit here and deal with the idea that she could be out there alone somewhere.”

  Brandt nodded slowly, and Ethan was grateful that Brandt didn’t seem judgmental at the idea and that he didn’t seem to be about to bring up the probability that Anna was dead. “So when are you wanting us to go?” Brandt asked gamely, catching Ethan by surprise.

  “Us?” Ethan repeated. He shook his head. “No, Brandt, there’s no ‘us.’ I’m not taking either one of you into that … that cesspool so I can look for Anna. It’s too dangerous, and I’m not risking anyone else’s lives because of what I need to do. It’s better that I go alone.”