by Dani René
My heart is now in my throat, thick and ominous. I attempt to swallow, trying to force myself to shove Damien away, but I don’t have to because, just as the white spark outside disappears within seconds, he moves away from me.
We stand in silence, our gazes locked, and I have nothing to say to him. My body is trembling from our interaction, and I know he can see it. Damien knows he has an effect on me, and he uses it to his advantage.
With a nod, he turns to leave. I watch his form retreating toward the door, but before he steps out, he twists his head, offering me only his profile to admire. His eyes burn with blue flames that dance with intent.
“I wanted to see you.”
My brows furrow in confusion. “What?” I croak.
“You asked me what I was doing here,” he tells me. “It was because I wanted to see you.” His admission hangs between us, for a second, before he spins on his shiny heel and leaves me in the greenhouse, still trembling.
When I sit down at the table beside Cassian, he leans over and whispers, “Don’t let Damien get to you. He’s an asshole, most times, even to us, but he cares.”
I don’t know why my heart flip flops at his words. It’s wrong to think about Damien in that way, but when he settles in at the head of the table, and my eyes find his, I know I’ll never see him in a familial way.
“So, tell us more about you,” Finn says, when he seats himself opposite me. “Any hobbies? Or favorite things to do?”
“I’m pretty much a homebody,” I shrug. “I love being on my own, spending time with my books. Not really a party animal.”
“That’s unfortunate because we’re having a party this weekend to welcome our new little sister to the family and the town.” Finn grins at me, while he spears a piece of meat and shoves it into his mouth. “She’s our guest of honor.”
“I didn’t know about this,” Damien speaks up, looking at Finn with a glare, his blue eyes sparking to life, and I can’t help but be pulled into that hard stare.
“I spoke to Holly and Mali,” Finn says with a playful grin. “They’re bringing the rest of the team, and The Black Knights want to head up here as well.”
“Fuck that, I’m not having those assholes in this house again.” Damien’s voice lowers into a growl, and I can’t stop the shiver that races down my spine as the warning drenches his words.
“Come on, D,” Cassian says. “It’s harmless fun. We’ll keep them down here, we can lock the door from the kitchen leading to the rest of the house and just have them in the garden. The kitchen will still be accessible, we can keep the living room patio doors locked as well.” He seems to have thought this through. “The pool house has a bathroom if they need it. I mean, think about it, we can keep them contained.”
I don’t know who The Black Knights are, but from the name alone, I can’t help but want to agree with Damien. I’m not a fan of crowds, and this sounds like it’s going to be big.
Blue eyes flash, flitting between the two younger brothers, and I silently pray that he says no but, after some consideration, Damien finally nods and says, “Fine. Outside.”
My heart leaps into my throat, as Finn whoops at the thought of having a bash in his father’s house. I doubt their dad would be impressed if he knew about this, but I have no say. It’s not my house.
“Looks like we’re having a party, little sister,” Finn tells me, with a satisfied grin on his face, and I don’t know why my eyes sweep to Damien. He’s watching me intently, and I wonder if he can see the trepidation I’m feeling.
I fake a smile, just like I’ve been taught to do all my life, and try to finish my dinner. Even though it’s delicious, the anxiety churning in my stomach makes it difficult to eat.
“Have you decided on a major?” Cassian asks from beside me.
Shaking my head, I tell him, “Not yet. I’m thinking of perhaps doing a History major. Something different to anything my mother wants me to do,” I tack on with a small smile. I can feel cerulean eyes piercing me, but I don’t look at him.
“History. If you like that kinda stuff, Damien can show you around the manor.” Finn grins as if there’s an inside joke that only he can hear. “This place is fucking old, I’m sure it’s haunted too.” With a chuckle, he shakes his head, and I try not to look at Damien, who I know is watching me.
“I’d love to learn more about Thorne Haven and the manor. I’ve always been interested in learning about how towns came about.”
“Are you musical at all?” Cassian poses, before taking a bite of his meal.
“Not really. More like tone-deaf.” I smile at him. “My mother wasn’t impressed that I didn’t want to get into show business as well. All my life, she begged and pleaded for me to go to castings. Even though I’ve been to a few, I never got the part. I guess acting isn’t my forte.”
“Being fake, not your kind of thing?” This comes from Damien, drawing my attention to him. The corner of his mouth quirks and I see the dimple forming in his cheek. His dark brow lifts into a perfect arch, and those baby blues flash with a challenge.
“No, it’s not. I guess being an asshole is your kind of thing?” At my challenge, both Finn and Cassian gasp, then laugh out loud, as they slap their hands in a high five across the table. But all the commotion doesn’t break the eye contact between Damien and me.
There’s a glint of surprise in his eyes. The shimmer of mischief, and then he smiles, and I’m not ready for it. Not my heart, not my body and, certainly, not my mind.
“Being an asshole takes a special kind of talent,” he says, leaning back against his chair. It’s almost as if he takes great satisfaction in being such a dick. He slides his chair back, rises to full height, and I can’t help my hungry eyes from drinking in every inch of him. He slowly rounds the table, making his way toward me.
When he reaches my chair, Damien leans in and presses his lips to my ear, which has heat shooting through every nerve in my body. My skin tingles with awareness of his proximity, and I bite back the whimper that threatens to escape.
“Don’t ever underestimate me, wild rose,” he murmurs in my ear. “I may be proud of it, but only those close to me are ever allowed to call me an asshole to my face.”
My mouth goes dry, my throat struggles to work, but I find my words, even though they come out in a croak. “And what happens to those who aren’t close to you?”
“They pay dearly,” he mumbles, the tone of his voice dropping so low, it’s almost as if his words vibrate through me.
He pushes up and leaves us in the dining room. I watch him for a long moment before I look back and find both brothers staring at me.
“I have to say, little sister,” Finn starts, “you have some big lady balls.” With a chuckle, he finishes his meal, offering us a quick salute, before he leaves the table. Cassian is smiling as he pushes his plate away.
“What?” I ask, turning to face the middle brother. He looks just like Damien, only his hair isn’t as dark, it’s more of a chocolate brown. He doesn’t look like an asshole, whereas Damien has that aloof coldness to his demeanor.
“Oh, I’ve just never seen anyone challenge my brother like that.” He sounds like he’s impressed when he says this. I can feel him regarding me closely, and I’m sure he’s trying to figure me out. It’s the first time I’ve been scrutinized so wholly by someone. Even with my mother’s job, I’ve steered clear of the public eye, for the very reason that people try to figure you out while they come up with their own conclusions on who you are.
“I think he should be called out more often,” I say, but my hands tremble when I think about how close his mouth was to mine. If I had turned my head, I would’ve practically kissed him.
Cassian grins, as something flashes in his eyes. His smirk matching his brother’s and I wonder, briefly, just how they can look so alike, yet act so different. At least, from what I’ve seen in the short time I’ve spent with all three of them.
“I like you, Nesrin,” Cassian tells me. “I think
you’ll be a breath of fresh air in this family.” He tips his head to the side before he nods and turns to leave. I watch him for a long moment before I take a deep breath, then let it out slowly. My feisty nature hasn’t come to light in such a long time, that even I was shocked at my outburst with Damien. A small smile curls my lips when I think about how his eyes flashed with indignation at my challenge.
“How was dinner?” Joy asks as she enters the room.
“It was lovely, thank you,” I tell her. “I was about to clear the table, the boys just left.”
“Oh, don’t you worry about it.” She shoos me with a wave of her hands. “I’m here to do this, so please, why don’t you go ahead and walk around, familiarize yourself with the house. It’s big enough to get lost in.”
“It looks like it,” I tell her, with a smile.
For a moment, she looks at me as if she’s about to say something important; her expression turns serious, but when her gaze flicks over my shoulder, it changes. “You’ll like it here,” Joy tells me before she grabs the stack of plates and scurries into the kitchen.
That was strange.
When I turn to leave, I find Damien leaning against the doorjamb, looking at me. He doesn’t look at all perturbed, his arms folded across his chest. I notice he’s now wearing a black leather jacket over the shirt he wore to dinner.
“I suggest you don’t go out into the garden at night,” he tells me, but there’s a warning bite to his tone. “It’s not safe out there.”
“Why? Will wild animals eat me?” I retort playfully, causing his smirk to appear. His lips tilt into a seductive grin, and his eyes seem to light up at my words.
“Not animals, no.” He leaves without another word, and his response slowly sinks in, making every inch of my body burn with the promise of what he actually meant.
10
Damien
The woods are dense and dark, and I know they’re dangerous, but it’s not me I’m worried about, it’s her. It’s only been a short while that I’ve been around her, but the need to keep her safe seems to override the want to send her packing.
Being in the house with her only seems to make me want to be near her. The banter between us has become twisted, more than I expected it to. Her fire is nothing like any girl I’ve come across, which only seems to turn me on more.
And that’s not a good thing.
She’s eighteen, I tell myself.
She’s an adult, I remind myself.
But each time, there’s a heavy foreboding that our age gap is far too big.
I twist open the bourbon and swig back a mouthful. The burning liquid trickles down my throat, reminding me that I’m alive, that I’m not lost in the darkness of this fucking town.
“I didn’t think I’d see you here tonight,” the sultry voice says from the shadows. Neither did I.
“Yeah, the house is a shitshow,” I tell her. But I don’t look at her because I don’t need to meet her hungry gaze. Genevieve has been one of my fuck buddies for years, and even when I left for college, she still waited for me. Love was never in the cards for us, and she knew that, but she never cared. I broke her heart more times than I can count. And even in those times, she would return, just to dance on my dick.
“Anything I can do to help?” she questions, in the tone that used to get me hard as fuck. Now, all I want is to go home, to taunt the little sister my father dumped us with.
“No.” Another swig of alcohol, reveling in the burn, I focus my attention on the dark water that sits before us. The stillness of the stream offers solace. Genevieve doesn’t take a hint; instead, she leans against the car beside me. She reaches for the bottle, and I allow her to grab it.
I finally turn to look at her. She takes a small mouthful, swirling the amber liquid, before swallowing it slowly.
“Is it another girl?” she asks, without looking at me. But I don’t know how to answer her. Yes, it is; no, it’s not. It’s a girl I can’t have because my father decided to stick his dick in her mother.
“Perhaps.” It’s the only thing I can offer in response. Genevieve hands me back the bottle and pulls out a packet of smokes. Even though I’m tempted, I don’t ask her for one. It’s one of the things that’s never truly fazed me. Finn smokes on the odd occasion, especially when he’s had a few drinks. But Cass and I have steered clear of it in recent years.
“I hope she’s worth it,” Gen tells me. “I mean, you could have so many beautiful women lining up for you.”
“Are you one of them? Is that why you’re here?” I’m challenging her, and I know it. There is no doubt in my mind that if I asked her to, she’d drop to her knees in front of me. But it doesn’t offer the allure that it used to, so I take a long gulp of bourbon instead.
“I just don’t like seeing you like this.”
“Like what?”
“Broken.”
I consider her words. I don’t feel broken at all, perhaps more frustrated. And not only sexually, deep down, I know that being around Nesrin does something to me. Something I never thought I would feel—at ease with myself.
“You’re torn,” Gen muses, before pulling in a lungful of smoke and keeping it there for a while until she blows rings into the dark night.
“I am.” My admission should be a shock to me, but it’s not. I knew it the moment I sat in the car with Nesrin. I was rocked by the intrigue she presented, and each time Finn or Cass asked her something, and she offered an answer, I found myself wanting to know as well.
“Perhaps you should ask her on a date,” Gen teases, then giggles beside me, because everyone knows I’m definitely not the dating kind. I don’t even spend the night if I’m with a woman. Being so close to someone will only hurt you in the end. It happened to my father, and it will happen again. I’ve seen lives torn apart, worlds shattered, just because people fell in love. They opened themselves up to it and then got smashed in the process.
“Why are you here, anyway?” I ask into the night. Even though this is my hiding spot, Gen is one of the only women I’ve ever been with who knows about it. Cass and Finn found me here once, so drunk, I had passed out. My father was looking for me all night, well into the day, and when my brothers found me, they thought it was funny. Finn’s too young to remember the fights that ensued in the manor; Cass probably remembers the night our mother left, but I doubt he can recall the times I would sit up on the landing and listen to their screams.
“Wanted to see you. I heard you’re back.”
“Finn’s an asshole.”
“He didn’t tell me. I overheard the girls talking,” Gen says. I know there are a few girls who my brothers know well and keep around when they need to let off some steam. “The Black Knights were talking about you as well.”
“Fuck them,” I bite out, clenching my jaw so tight, I feel the ache in my cheeks. I gulp down another mouthful of alcohol before I hand the bottle to Gen.
“They want you back,” she tells me. I know they do. They’ve been pandering around like lost sheep since I walked, but I’m not going back to that life. It’s nothing I need. Especially now that I have a sister who’s fucking with my head.
“I’m not walking backward in my life. Not anymore,” I tell her, hoping she’ll take the news to them. I know they’ll be at the party we’re having, and I don’t doubt they’ll force the issue of me joining back up, but it’s not happening.
Kids in this town have always tried to find new ways to keep themselves entertained, and the Havens were well-known for the dangerous games. But I’m done playing them. I am all grown up and no longer want to get into the shit they do.
“Does this have anything to do with the girl?” Gen asks, the challenge in her tone mingled with curiosity is clear. I know she’ll go back to them and give them all the information she’s gleaned from me. I shouldn’t have spoken about Nesrin, but I can’t help it. I have nobody in my life I can confide in. Loneliness is a motherfucker, and it sneaks up on you when you least expect it.
“No. It has to do with me, Gen.” I turn to Genevieve, pinning her with a stare that’s fierce and confident. “Did you come here to ask me shit, so you can tell them all you’ve learned? Or did you come here because you wanted to get back in my bed?”
“Why are you such an asshole, Damien?” Gen bites back, her eyes glower with fury as she stares at me. Her long reddish-brown hair hangs to the middle of her back. The deep green of her eyes is black in the darkness. And her plump lips are pursed, but I no longer have any interest.
“Because that’s how you like it.” I shove by her, ignoring her frustrated hissy fit when I slip into the driver’s seat of my Camaro. It’s the only woman I love, the only woman who hasn’t left me for something better.
“Fuck you,” Gen bites out. She’s angry now, but give it a couple of days, and she’ll be begging to get back in my good graces.
“Already done that, Sweetheart, I’m done playing your games. And tell The Black Knights that I’m finished.” I pull out onto the road, leaving her in the dark.
It doesn’t take me long to reach home, and the moment I step foot in the house, I hear a guffaw coming from the living room. Stepping over the threshold of the large open-plan room, I find Finn and Nesrin giggling over something they’re watching on his computer screen. They’re on the sofa, almost snuggled up to each other. The sight itself brings rage to the forefront of my mind, burning through every vein in my body.
“Gen says to tell you that she wants your dick on Saturday,” I tell Finn, who snaps his gaze to mine.
“Oh?” His dark brow arches, the smile on his face shows just how excited he is at the prospect. “Tell her I don’t take sloppy seconds from my big brother, but I’ll gladly feed her my dick if she’s hungry.”