A Cut so Deep (Thornes & Roses Book 1)

by Dani René

  17

  Damien

  When I told Cass and Finn about my idea, they were on board. I told Nesrin on her first night that she should be careful of the garden out back, but I didn’t tell her why. And tonight, I’ll gladly show her.

  The thought of her cutting herself turns my blood hot with rage. Seeing her scars, earlier, was too much, and if she truly wants to feel a release, she’ll find it with me. And only me.

  “There’s a storm coming,” Cassian tells me, as we watch the stars flicker in the dark sky. The moon is merely a sliver of silver. The trees break through the glittering pinpricks, and I shiver with excitement at what’s to come.

  “There is a storm brewing in the distance,” I agree. “I have a feeling that our annual dance is going to be explosive,” I tell my brother.

  “The Havens will want her,” he tells me. “They’re not going to stop until they claim something we have.”

  “They can’t have her.” My biting tone catches in my throat, the words hang heavy with promise, with rage. I’m barely keeping it together, and I know Creed will notice it the moment he’s around Nesrin and me at the dance.

  “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re marking your territory,” Cassian muses beside me, and I can’t stop the frustration at the situation from getting a hold of me.

  I bite out, “I didn’t piss on her.”

  “You may as well have,” he tells me, causing my muscles to tense. If everyone else can see it, I’m sure she can as well.

  I cast a quick glance at Cass. “Not into golden showers, brother,” I retort when he crinkles his nose at the thought. “Besides, I don’t need to piss on her to show him she’s mine. All you have to do is see how she looks at me.”

  “Oh?” He quips. “Has she been undressing you with her eyes?”

  “I don’t blame the girl, I mean look at me, of course she has,” I joke, but the thought of being naked in front of her, of seeing her bared to me, plays in my mind, and I have to shake it off. “Tonight, she’ll either run or hide.”

  “Are you sure about this?” Cassian’s worried. We haven’t played this game in a couple of years. Not since the night Creed and I had a fight, and I know it’s dangerous. But I think it’s exactly what Nesrin needs.

  “Not entirely, but if she finds solace in it, I’ll do it.”

  My brother stares at me, I can feel his questioning eyes on me. Cassian and I have always had a strange connection. It’s almost as if he can read my mind. “You’re falling for her.”

  Snapping my gaze to my brother, I furrow my brows and find him looking at the garden, instead of me. “What the fuck do you mean?”

  “You are. I can see it when you talk about her.” He doesn’t turn to me because he knows if he looks at me, I’ll punch him right in the gut.

  I don’t love.

  I’ve seen how destructive loving someone can be. I vowed never to fall for someone the way my father loved my mother. He got hurt, burned because he trusted her, he believed she was the one. All that fate bullshit is a farce.

  “Don’t deny it, Damien. I know you better than you know yourself. Even though I’m a year younger, at times, I feel a lot older.”

  “I’m ready,” Finn says, as he enters the room, interrupting our heated conversation. He’s dressed all in black, just like me and Cass. We’re all three wearing our hoodies. The first time I did this, I never felt so free, and I hope that I can give Nesrin that same experience. Nothing can ever compare to the exhilaration that flows through me when I race through the darkness. Except for her kiss. The thought comes to me quickly, but I push it back, hiding it in the shadows of my mind. I shouldn’t want her so much. The moment our parents return, we’ll need to stop this… thing we’ve started.

  “Man, I’m so fucking excited for this. You know it’s been too long since we let loose,” Finn says, as he nears us. My youngest brother is the one who would walk back into The Black Knights and ask them to make him a part of their group. He’s always loved rebelling against everything I’ve told him, including befriending the Havens.

  When he was much younger, I cared far too much. I wanted him safe, and I didn’t want him to end up like I did, with war wounds that will never heal.

  Finders Keepers was a game that Creed and I invented after we turned sixteen. It was meant to be our way of choosing the girls we wanted. Being a teenager in this town meant that we could run amok, and nobody would flutter an eyelash, and Creed and I took advantage of that.

  Leaving a burnt rose on the doorstep of the girl we wanted to take became well-known within the town, and we did it for a couple of years before it turned into something far darker than I anticipated. The rose was the signal that she was mine, or if he left the rose, the girl was his. I would leave red roses while he would leave pink.

  It was a game of cat and mouse in the dark; while we were the hunters, the girls became our prey. We labeled it an adult version of hide and seek, even though we weren’t nearly old enough to do the shit we did.

  The thrill of chasing down a pretty girl in the darkness was intoxicating. Over the years, it became more and more exhilarating, and that’s when we tried to one-up each other. I would do something, and Creed would add more danger, more thrill to it. But the moment Creed took it too far, I watched how dangerous his actions became, and I knew I had to walk away before this game turned fatal.

  But tonight, I’m going to do it again.

  I’m going to give Nesrin what she needs.

  “Nesrin wants to experience our game, and we’re going to show her how Thornes play Finders Keepers,” I tell Finn, then glance at Cassian. His gaze narrows. The words he uttered to me earlier, ringing true.

  I do like her.

  More than I should.

  If I were a good person, a moral person, I would walk away and allow her to meet someone who can offer her a happy life. She’s eighteen, old enough to have a boyfriend, but the thought of any guy touching her sends the poisonous emotion—jealousy—racing through my veins.

  I know I can never let her go. Not now that I’ve tasted her mouth, felt her body mold to mine. As much as I should make sure this is nothing more than a short fling, while our folks aren’t home, I have a feeling it’s nothing near the one night stands I used to crave.

  She’s mine.

  And I know I can’t walk away from her.

  18

  Nesrin

  When I reach the living room, all three brothers are staring at me as I walk through the doorway. I’m dressed in black, just like Damien asked me to be, with sneakers and a hoodie.

  “What are we doing?”

  Three sets of eyes pin me to the spot. But it’s Damien who speaks, “We’re playing a game of hunting the prey. Finders Keepers.” His voice is deep. A baritone that sneaks through my veins and slides all the way over me, until it settles between my legs in a pulse of desire.

  “Hunt?”

  “Do you remember what I told you about going into the garden at night?” he asks, his dark brow arching and the corner of his mouth kicking into a familiar smirk that deepens his dimples.

  “I do,” I croak, the memory sending heat to my cheeks.

  “You have a count of ten, after that, you’re prey. We’ll come after you.” He crosses his arms, his gaze boring into me in challenge. Perhaps he’s expecting me to refuse, to stop this stupidity because that’s what it is. But what Damien Thorne doesn’t bank on is me racing by him and out the door into the dark garden.

  There’s only a sliver of moon that illuminates my way, but other than that, I’m on my own. By the time I see the property line, I know I’m fucked because I can hear the soft footfalls behind me.

  Their voices, grunts, are so close, it’s as if I can feel the warmth of their breath in my neck causing goose bumps to dot my skin. I’m not a great runner, but the thought of them catching me has my feet moving quickly. I don’t know how this is meant to stop my self-harm addiction, but for some unknown reason, I trust D
amien to know what he’s doing.

  My breath is coming in short spurts, my eyes try to adjust to the darker surroundings, as I race through the too tall trees. Under the shroud, I can’t see the moon anymore. Every now and then, there’s a sliver of light that escapes.

  “I’m coming for you, wild rose,” Damien’s shout bounces off the trunks, reaching me in a dark promise that makes my heart slam against my ribs. Usually, the pain of cutting myself releases the anxious feelings, the darkness that swirls in my mind, but right now, those emotions are no longer here.

  My focus is on the race, on the game, rather than the thoughts in my mind. It’s freeing not having voices telling me I’m not good enough, or that I’m broken, damaged goods.

  I’m not sure where I’m going, but I can hear the crack of branches, every now and then, as they start closing the distance. I take a left, rushing through the thick trunks. With every step, I feel another scrape as the branches attack my legs, but I’ve never felt such a rush.

  Having Damien understand what I need has shocked me. As I move in the darkness, I find myself forgetting the stress of my life and focusing solely on the euphoria snaking through me.

  “I’m coming for you, little sis,” a voice startles me, causing my legs to move even quicker. Finn is close, so damn close. His footsteps crunch behind me, and I turn left, hoping he’ll go right.

  “You can’t hide in here,” Cassian’s words trickle over me. Both brothers are moving fast, they’re closing the distance between us, and if I don’t do something quickly, they’ll catch me. I turn right, then left. My mind free of the worries of everyday life, of my mother, and school. The only thing that matters is the darkness that’s swallowing me as I move through the trees.

  I find myself drenched in darkness and sweat. Stopping against one of the thicker trunks, I lean my head back, inhaling deeply, trying to catch my breath that the night has stolen.

  My heart is racing faster than it ever has before, and my legs are shaky from the exertion, but I’ve never felt more myself than I do right now. A smile appears on my lips, and I look up at the murkiness above me. A splash of water echoes through the trees from somewhere in the darkness, and I push away from the trunk, my feet carrying me forward.

  I don’t know where Cass and Finn have gone, but they’re no longer breathing down my neck. Thankfully, I’m able to catch a breath. My lungs are pulling in air, deeply, and as I exhale, the white puff of smoke from my lips is an indication of how chilly it is out here. But I don’t feel it. I’m hot, sweating, and my mind is clear.

  It doesn’t take me long to pass by a break in the trees. I stop when the view before me changes from thick blackness to charcoal. There’s a silver-topped lake in front of me, and I gasp in shock when I see it sparkling in the moonlight.

  On the other side of the bank of water, I notice red glowing. My gaze narrows, as I try to make out what it is. Suddenly, arms wrap around me, causing a piercing scream to tumble from my lips.

  A hand snakes around my mouth, covering my lips. I can’t call out, but I can certainly fight. My body wriggles in the tight hold of the person behind me. Hot breath fans over my neck, which is trickling with sweat.

  “If you keep fighting, I’ll only get hard, and then I’m going to have to ask you to help me with it,” his voice threatens in the dark, causing heat to race down my spine, and pool between my thighs.

  Even though I’m trying to speak, his hand is still covering my mouth. I cease all movement, and a dark, animalistic chuckle vibrates through his chest, into my back.

  Damien is nothing short of a savage. A hunter who seems to enjoy the chase. He slowly releases me, his body still warming me, but the moment I spin on my heel, I’m met with those luminous eyes.

  “You scared me,” I tell him.

  “It was all part of the plan, wild rose,” he murmurs, the words feathering over my mouth, and I find myself leaning into him. I’m still shaking when he snakes his arm around my body, pulling me against his chest.

  “That was…” I whisper, but I can’t find the words to describe just what I’m feeling. The experience was otherworldly, and even though there are scratches all over my legs and hands, I would do it again.

  Damien’s gaze sneaks over my shoulder, momentarily, before he turns, tugging me with him. A quick glance over my shoulder shows me that the fire I noticed there earlier is gone.

  “What’s going on?”

  “We need to get out of here,” he speaks, but the tone of his voice belies the calmness of his body. Something is wrong.

  “I’m not going anywhere until you—”

  He cuts me off by spinning on his heel, sneaking his shoulder into my stomach, and hoisting me over his shoulder. And then we’re moving.

  I’m bumping against him, up and down, the breath from my lungs whooshing, each time I land stomach first on his shoulder.

  “Put me the fuck down, Damien!” My voice carries in the darkness, bouncing off the trees, as we make our way back to the house. But I don’t know if we are headed in the right direction since I’m upside down, and I’m lost.

  I hear a branch crack in the distance, and Damien slows down. His feet squishing on the mulch beneath his shoes, and then, I’m sliding down his body. Every hard inch of him, flush with mine.

  “I thought you weren’t playing games anymore.” A deep voice comes from the shadows. I recognize it instantly—Creed.

  “What do you want, Haven?” Damien pushes me behind him, shielding me from whatever is about to go down.

  “I noticed your girl, and I thought I’d come to see if she’s okay,” Creed says. He’s nothing like Damien, with short brown hair and luminous green eyes that shine with malicious intent. He’s inked, from what I can tell when he closes the distance between us. I didn’t notice his tattoos the night of the party, because I wasn’t paying attention, but his neck is a canvas.

  “She’s fine.” Damien’s voice holds an edge of challenge. The men seem so engrossed in the fight that’s brewing, which only annoys me because I’m not some toy for them to fight over.

  Pushing past Damien, I step up to Creed. A smirk curls his full lips, and the piercing in the middle of his lower lip glints under the silver light of the moon.

  “A pretty mouse captured by the big bad hunter,” Creed says, his gaze flicking between Damien and me. “You know, Damien, when you walked away from The Dark Knights, I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I truly believed you had changed.” Creed crosses his arms in front of his chest while he tips his head to the side. “But I think you’re just as fucking tortured as the rest of us.”

  “I may be tortured, but I’m nothing like you.” The venom in Damien’s voice is ice, pouring between us, causing the large rift between the Thornes and the Havens to crack further.

  “Does she know about the town? Does she know the secrets that broke us apart in the first place?” The look on Creed’s face tells me there are more secrets between them than I’ve heard and more that I should have learned about.

  “If you want to talk, you’re more than welcome to come to me directly, other than that, Nesrin has no bearing on this world.”

  “Your little sister needs to learn, Damien.”

  “I’m not his sister,” I bite out, anger surging through me, but it only causes Creed to stare at me. There’s a hint of confusion that paints his expression, for a moment, before he smiles. But it’s not friendly, there’s a knowing to his face that makes me shiver with fear.

  “You know, Thorne,” he says, looking at Damien. “I never once pegged you for such a bad boy. Breaking all the rules and doing it with a straight face.” This time, the laugh that comes from Creed is almost inhumane. “I’ll see you both at the dance. And I’m sure that it’s going to be a night to never forget.”

  He spins on his heel, leaving us in the darkness; me shaking with anxiety and Damien shuddering with rage. His arms snake across my middle, and he holds me to his warmth.

  “What did he mean?”<
br />
  “He’s seen me claim you,” Damien murmurs in my ear.

  Shock shakes me for a moment before I ask, “How?”

  “The need for me to protect you overtook me, and I couldn’t hide the fact that having him near you fucked with my head. He saw me. One thing you’ll learn about Creed is that he’s intuitive. He can read situations easily, and because he knows me, he’s seen right through my possessive nature.”

  I turn around, his arms still holding me close. When I’m finally facing him, I look up into cerulean eyes. “He knows that we’re…” The words filter off into the silence that hangs between us, but he doesn’t have to respond because I know the truth.

  Creed knows that Damien and I are more than we should be.

  “He won’t have you,” Damien tells me. “You’re mine. And I’m not losing that, not now, not ever.”

  “Don’t say things that could change in an instant.” My voice cracks, but he sees the pain that seems to haunt me. Damien cups my face in his strong hands, holding me close. “Please, Damien, take me home.”

  “If you say that in your seductive voice, I’m going to do more than take you home,” he promises in the darkness.

  “Then do it.”

  “On one condition,” he practically growls the words, which only seems to send heat shooting through me.

  “Anything.”

  A dark brow arches at my response. “Promise me you’re mine.”

  “I can’t—”

  “I’m not asking for love, or any of that bullshit. I want to do things to you that should be illegal.”

  “I thought it would be since your father is married to my mother,” I tease, the challenge hanging between us in the night sky.