Shadows of Our Past

by Tanya Jean Russell

  When William turned and spotted her, poised at the top of the stairs, she smiled reassuringly at him.

  “It’s going to be fine. We have a full tactical team on standby. They will be in position shortly and we know what we’re doing.”

  His skeptical expression made it clear he wasn’t convinced.

  “Trust me,” Amory said, “we’re going to get you through this.”

  “What if it goes wrong?” William asked. “What if they can’t get to us in time?”

  “William, they are skilled experts at this. I’ve worked with this team a lot over the years and I trust them with my life. In fact, I have trusted them with my life on a number of occasions. No matter what, they won’t let it get out of hand before coming in, and as extra backup I’ll be armed.”

  William’s eyebrows rose. “You?”

  She choked back a laugh at his shock. “Yes, William. Me. You’re our star witness, I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

  “What about Jackson?”

  “I’ll watch out for him, too.”

  “Thanks, but what’s going on with you two? How do I know one of you won’t blow it?”

  She swallowed. Telling William the truth about her history with Jackson would do nothing to settle his nerves but she still needed to assure him it was going to be okay.

  “We do have a history but it’s not very interesting. He’s just unhappy that I didn’t tell him what was going on when he arrived here,” she said. She settled on a half-truth to explain the animosity Jackson felt for her.

  “I’m going to speak to him in a minute and I’ll make sure we’re good. You just need to remember that Jackson cares about you. He won’t jeopardize this.”

  She abruptly changed the subject to lighten the mood.

  “Now, take off your trousers,” she said, giving the order with a teasing tone.

  William’s head jerked up to meet her amused gaze. “W-w-what?” he stuttered, clearly confused by the request.

  She waved the bug and a roll of tape at him. “We need to strap you up.”

  As William reluctantly pushed his trousers down, Amory knelt in front of him and ripped a long strip of tape off.

  “Hold that there,” she said as she placed the device on his inner thigh. “This isn’t the best place for sound quality but it’s the securest spot if we don’t want the device to be detected.”

  She kept up a rambling monologue about what she was doing to distract William as much as to explain her actions, all the while taking care not to mention that the bugs also worked as tracking devices. James had advised against letting either of the brothers know about that little feature. If they knew, they’d only start worrying about what sort of circumstance would make tracking them necessary. Tactically they didn’t foresee a need for tracking, but experience had taught them it was a precaution worth taking.

  Heart in her mouth, Amory left William and headed to Jackson’s room. Her insides swirled as the anticipation of seeing him warred with dread at seeing the hatred in his eyes.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Jackson opened his bedroom door, his mouth a hard line as he leaned his raised forearm against the frame and took in Amory’s disheveled appearance. She looked as exhausted as he felt. Despite his best efforts, he hadn’t been able to resist seeking her out repeatedly during the day. He hadn’t been able to make himself speak to her, it had been as if just seeing her would help him make sense of the mess that was currently his head.

  Her tentative smile made his heart leap. He really needed to man up if someone could lie to him the way she had and still make him want her—not just want to have sex, which obviously he did, but more than that. He wanted to be near her, to bundle her up, protect her from the night ahead and never let go.

  Watching as she’d set up the listening devices, he realized the severity of the situation had really hit home. He’d known on an academic level that this was a serious situation, but watching her systematically go through the rooms and prepare had really opened his eyes to just how important and potentially dangerous things were. Hovering in doorways just watching her, a very real fear had begun to overtake all of his other raging emotions. People just didn’t have lives like this, this was the stuff of TV shows. It wasn’t reality.

  She had been calm as she’d worked through her tasks and he’d realized just how deep her inner strength ran. He couldn’t imagine the things she must have dealt with to remain in such control with the night they had ahead of them. He’d swallowed down his rising admiration. Whenever she had noticed him watching he’d turned on his heels, embarrassed to be caught staring at her, but equally unable to bear speaking to her while he felt so raw. Yet he hadn’t been able to stop himself from seeking her out.

  Dragging his free hand down his face, he sighed deeply as she pushed his door wider to get past, and effectively ignoring the barrier he’d tried to create with his body, she entered his room.

  “I just need to sort this out,” she said, a sad smile on her face as she waved the bug he’d have to wear at him.

  Seeing her standing in his room, only steps from his bed, his libido kicked to life as explicit memories bombarded him.

  Jackson shook his head, as if the action could empty the images of her body wrapped around his from his mind. He needed to pull it together. He shouldn’t still want her, but unfortunately his body hadn’t received the message. She’d betrayed him, he needed to remember that. He steeled his resolve and ground out his response.

  “Where will it go?”

  “Your choice,” she said. “I put William’s on his inner thigh as they are likely to make physical contact with him, but…”

  Jackson’s fists clenched as his mind conjured the image of Amory’s slender hands touching his brother’s thigh. He didn’t want to feel jealous, didn’t want to feel everything. Fighting to control his rolling emotions, he nearly missed the rest of her sentence.

  “You could have it on your chest. They’re less likely to find yours, so whichever you prefer.”

  “Which way is best?” he asked, determined that he’d do whatever it took to make sure tonight was the end of this.

  “The sound quality is better on the chest,” Amory replied.

  Jackson let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. The sight of her long hair hanging damply around her shoulders and the hint of citrus that reached him and made him think of her wet and naked in the shower, was causing a very physical reaction that made him glad she didn’t need access to his thighs right now. If she’d touched him somewhere as intimate as his thigh, he didn’t know if he could stop himself from begging her to have him back.

  “Chest it is then,” he said and unbuttoned his shirt fully, pulling it apart to allow her access.

  She stood frozen, staring at his chest, and eventually he coughed to get her attention. Her delicate neck undulated as she swallowed and a small part of him swelled with satisfaction that she was still fighting their attraction as strongly as he was.

  Tentatively she stepped toward him and placed the bug low between his pectorals, asking him to hold it as she cut a piece of tape to secure it in place. Her fingers brushing his sent a jolt of electricity shooting through his body and he was almost consumed by the urge to drop to his knees and plead for her to be his.

  As she pressed the tape across the bug and eased the sides down, pressing his chest to be certain it was holding, he realized that his relief at the bug’s location was premature. Holding himself rigid he balled his hands into fists, holding them so tight the skin on his knuckles strained with the effort. Every cell of his body screamed at him to kiss her. Why was he holding back when she obviously wanted him as much as he wanted her? Trust and honesty be damned.

  Before he could act she took a step back mumbling, “See you later.”

  Struggling to control his breathing, he stood frozen as she left the room, an ache radiating through his hands as he finally unclenched them. He needed to pull himself toget
her. They had a long, dangerous night ahead of them and he was letting her turn him upside down and inside out.

  ****

  Standing so close to Jackson, feeling his firm chest against her fingertips had taken her breath away. No matter how disappointed she was in his inability to take responsibility for himself, and no matter how painful it was to see the pain in his eyes every time he looked at her, her body still responded to him as powerfully as ever. It had taken all of her self-control to pull her fingers away from the heat of his muscular chest rather than press against it. Just thinking about feeling that sculpted definition sent heat pooling low in her abdomen.

  Trembling, her cheeks flamed as she remembered the way he’d had to cough to get her to stop staring at him. She’d just about managed to stop herself from falling at his feet and pleading with him to forgive her deception, but she knew she’d failed miserably in her attempts to hide the pure desire that still raged through her. His rigid displeasure at having her so close was the only thing that had let her hold onto her dignity enough to leave without begging him to touch her.

  As she carefully prepared for the night ahead, the familiar rush of adrenaline and anticipation grew, pushing aside every other emotion. She was going to make sure they got what they needed from Berishka, and fast. If she didn’t do her job quickly enough, the tactical team would come in to stop the party from getting out of hand, and she wasn’t foolish enough to think they’d get another chance anytime soon.

  She stuck her own bug to her chest, the cowl-neck on her deep gold dress providing plenty of cover, then strapped her holster to her thigh. Picking up her weapon she cocked the barrel to load it, double-checked the safety, and tucked it into place before slipping the dress over her head.

  Not quite as glamorous as she ought to be, she thought, taking in the black ballet slippers and the dress that stopped just below her knees. A full-length gown and heels were more the norm for an event at the Halland house, but then people didn’t usually need to be able to run and access their weapon easily. The ponytail and minimal makeup were her attempt at making sure Berishka’s guests didn’t confuse her with the entertainment.

  As her foot hit the final step on her way downstairs, the crunching sound of gravel indicated the arrival of their guest of honor. Putting on her best smile, she stepped out of the house to great them, suppressing her revulsion as Berishka brought her palm to his lips in greeting. The look in his eyes suggested that whatever her plans, and whatever image she had intended to project, he certainly saw her as part of the evening’s entertainment.

  “Come in, we’re all ready to welcome your guests,” she cooed at Berishka, nodding politely to Novak as he followed them to the library.

  The look Novak gave her was chilling but she was comfortably into her character and she ignored it easily.

  “I will, we have so looked forward to this evening,” Berishka replied smoothly.

  Relieved to leave the pair to William’s care, she found the next hour passed in a blur as she welcomed one odious man after another. All told, Berishka had invited just under twenty people and she was surprised at how different the men appeared on the surface. Accents ranged from strong regional ones to gentry. While they had all turned out in tailored suits, though, they didn’t look equally at ease with some looking like a cheap imitation of extras from The Sopranos. Yet despite the physical variances, they all exuded that sense of restrained violence that she’d become so familiar with over the years. Without fail every of them had slimed up to her, making crude remarks or attempting to cop a feel as she led them to join the gathering.

  Part of her was amused at their ridiculous comments and behavior as she considered the laughs they would be giving her colleagues who were listening in. These were powerful men who were clearly used to being surrounded by people who submitted to their every whim. She was looking forward to bringing them all down with Berishka. In fact, if it wasn’t for Jackson’s irritated glares as she brought each new addition to be welcomed by Berishka, she’d have relaxed completely into the zone by now. She kept half an eye on him, monitoring his mood, needing to make sure he didn’t screw this up. The tension of waiting over, she was glad to be able to trust in her abilities and training, her entire focus on getting through the evening.

  Chapter Thirty Three

  Jackson was beside himself with fury. Standing around having to make conversation with these animals disgusted him. He didn’t know how they hadn’t noticed the hostility he felt, which he knew was showing despite his best efforts. Amory looked beautiful in some sort of yellow dress. Yet again, something which should have looked plain made her sparkle.

  As he was nodding blankly at the man who was happily telling him something about his tax savings, Amory appeared with a short, round, balding man. She was smiling sweetly at him as she led him to Marek. Having made the introductions she turned and the man swatted her on the ass, his hand lingering for a second. His hands tightened into fists as he fought the urge to vault across the room and punch the guy. To anyone else it would have looked like she had seemed to ignore the action but her jaw tensed briefly as she walked away, the change so quick and so slight he knew he only spotted it because he’d been studying her, and because he knew every inch of her face so well.

  How the hell was he going to get through this? Was he really supposed to stand here making polite conversation while she chatted attentively to these bastards, smiling and laughing lightly despite the hungry way they looked at her and in some cases even touched her?

  He’d known tonight was going to be hard but he was totally unprepared for this. Clenching his teeth so hard his jaw hurt, he forced himself to nod seriously at the man who was talking to him. He wouldn’t leave William to deal with this on his own, and despite how confused his feelings were he couldn’t leave while there was any risk to Amory. Seeing her with these people, his hurt at her deception was being swamped by a realization of just how important her work was.

  Logic might be reminding him that this was her job, but despite knowing to his own detriment just how good she was at that job, he still wanted nothing more than to grab her and take her somewhere safe, somewhere he could lock her away with him until it was all over. She seemed so comfortable and confident, but he couldn’t believe she really felt that way. He supposed she must be used to dealing with difficult people, but the Amory he knew wouldn’t want this type of attention. That Amory was more likely to smack them in the face before they ever managed to make contact. He couldn’t help the smile that curled his lips at the idea of her knocking the guy out.

  Realizing he was drawing curious glances from his companions, he schooled his features and attempted to look interested in their conversation when one thought filled his mind. No matter what secrets she had kept from him, he knew her, really knew her.

  ****

  Holding a tray in her hands Amory moved around the room, careful not to step close enough for anyone to touch her, and offered the hors d’oeuvres to the guests.

  She was hoping that once the food was out of the way things would start happening. She didn’t know how or when Berishka would bring the girls in, but unless she could get people to start saying incriminating things, and fast, the whole thing was going to fail epically.

  Once everyone was happily eating and their drinks had been topped up, she stepped out into the hallway to take a breather.

  “I’m going to punch the next guy who touches my ass,” she whispered into her chest as she leaned against the wall, smiling and enjoying the moment alone, well, as alone as she could get with a mic taped to her chest. She knew her colleagues would be laughing their own asses off at her comment. They knew her well enough to know the effort it would take for her to hold back.

  A swell of chatter reached her, breaking the peace, and she looked up to see Berishka closing the door to the library behind him and striding toward her.

  “What is the matter, princess? You are not enjoying our party?” he said, his face shining with
malice.

  “Just taking a breather,” she said with a smile, easing herself off the wall slowly, as if exhausted.

  As he reached her his hand whipped out and grabbed her arm. She ignored the reflex that urged her to throw her own arm up and block the movement before he could make contact, instead lifting her other hand and resting it on his.

  “Can I help you with something?” she asked as sweetly as she could manage. What she really wanted to do was smack him in his smug face, but the minute she fought back this was all over.

  A smile curved his lips and he lifted his other hand to stroke her hair. Her heart lurched in her chest but she kept her body language relaxed while the fingers of her free hand felt for the hem of her dress, easing it up inch by inch so she could reach her weapon if she needed to. He lifted her ponytail gently and eased it over her shoulder so it hung down the front. Just as her fingers brushed against the canvas of her holster he grabbed her ponytail. Twisting it around his fist he pulled hard, forcing her head to tilt low. Instinctively she swung her knee up but the awkward position meant she missed her intended target, instead smacking into his thigh hard enough to make him wince. She let him whip her around to face the wall before kicking back with her heel. Maybe flats hadn’t been the best choice after all—great for running, not so great for inflicting injury, but then she was deliberately holding back, wanting him to think she was reacting in the way any cornered woman might. He swore, low and guttural in his mother tongue as she made contact, but his grip didn’t ease an inch.

  Leaning closer, his hot breath made her shiver as he whispered into her ear.

  “We are just getting started, is the party not going as you had expected?”

  “What do you mean? Isn’t this the party you wanted?” she asked, her stomach sinking at his words.