by Violet Duke
The thought of Maddie holding a baby with her blue eyes and dark curls drifted through Jamisonâs mind unbidden, stirring up a strange feeling somewhere behind his ribs. Before he could sort out what the feeling was, Maddieâs perfume drifted to his nose, smelling like wildflowers and springtime and a dozen other wonderful things all rolled into one light, floral scent.
âOh, she looks so beautiful,â Maddie whispered from behind him.
Jamison turned to see her standing a few feet away, happy tears shining in her eyes, looking so stunning in a royal blue dress with ruffles above the knee that it was all he could do not to reach out and pull her into his arms. His chest went tight with the need to hold her, to say how glad he was to see her after a long day apart. Heâd gotten off work yesterday at noon, but heâd had errands to run and then sheâd had to go into the bakery at four this morning. He hadnât gotten a full twenty-four hour Maddie fix, and he felt it.
âHi,â she said as she came to stand beside him, shooting him a quick smile that warmed him all over.
He could see how glad she was to see himâshe was a bad actress, and hopeless when it came to concealing her feelingsâbut Jake and Naomi would likely be too wrapped up in the christening to pay attention to the fact that Maddie and Jamison couldnât keep their eyes off of each other.
And if they werenâtâ¦well who really cared? Jamison was ready to claim Maddie as his, to shout her name from the church rafters and let everyone know he was completely gone on the woman standing beside him.
âSo whoâs going to hold the baby?â Jake asked as Father Seamus stood with Bible in hand, clearly ready to get things started before he fell asleep.
âI donât know,â Maddie said, glancing up at him. âWe hadnât talked about it.â
âI think you should,â Jamison said. âYouâll feel more like her mama, so if she wakes up, hopefully she wonât get scared.â
âOkay.â Maddie smiled, a beautiful smile that broke his heart into pieces.
Until Maddie, heâd never known that happiness could shatter you the same way sadness could, or that he would come to crave that sweet, pleasure-pain like nothing else. He didnât want to stay whole when he was with Maddie, he wanted her to come in swinging and break him apart just for the bliss of being put back together with her touch, her kiss, the way she said his name when there was no one else around to hear.
He was in love with her, hopelessly in love, but he hadnât let himself say the words again yet. Things had been good since their talk in the alley behind the bakeryâbetter than goodâand he didnât want to rock the boat.
Theyâd had a night to remember camping out on his auntâs property with the blindfold and a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs Maddie had laughed at until she found out how much fun they could be, and spent every night Jamison wasnât working together since. Theyâd watched old action movies, made caramel popcorn, and drizzled the leftover caramel all over each other before licking it off. Theyâd crept up to the roof of the bakery with their sleeping bags and slept out under the stars, waking to make love as the sky was turning a rosy pink the same color as Maddieâs lips. Theyâd even donned hats and glasses as disguises and caught a movie at the newly reopened drive-in, making out in the back seat during a midnight showing of Grease like they were in high school.
Almost every night, the âLâ word had threatened to escape Jamisonâs lips again, but never so much as when Naomi shifted the sleeping Noelle into Maddieâs arms and he and Maddie went to stand together beside the priest, next to the font of water sparkling in the late afternoon light. Now, he felt a rush of feeling unlike anything heâd felt before, almost as if God himself were looking down and giving him a kick in the ass, telling him to grab onto the woman beside him and never let her go.
And maybe He was. Jamison had had his ups and downs with his spiritual journey, but Maddie was teaching him to believe in miracles, and he knew nothing had ever felt more holy than holding her in his arms.
âIf youâll put your right hand on the baby, Jamison, weâll begin,â Father Seamus said with a smile before turning to face the small group of family and friends who had gathered for the ceremony.
Jamison moved closer to Maddie, slipping his hand around her to rest gently on the babyâs head, surprised to find his throat tightening with emotion. He had been honored when Jake asked him to be his daughterâs godfather, but heâd never dreamt heâd be fighting the urge to start sniffling right along with Maddie.
Father Seamus began the ceremony by asking Jake and Naomi for an official pronouncement of the babyâs name and then offering blessings, giving Jamison the chance to pull himself together. By the time the priest finished reading a few scripture passages heâd prepared and turned back to Jamison and Maddie, Jamison was able to promise to help Noelle on her spiritual journey with a steady voice.
Maddie promised the same, and Noelleâs head was sprinkled with holy water and her forehead traced with the sign of the crossâcausing the baby to open sleepy blue eyes and snuffle with disapproval before shoving her fist into her mouth and falling back asleepâand the deed was done.
âSleepy girl,â Maddie cooed as she delivered Noelle back into Naomiâs arms.
âShe is,â Naomi agreed, beaming down at her daughter. âShe missed second nap today while we were over at Mom and Dadâs.â
âBut weâll make sure she gets her naps in when sheâs staying with us,â Naomiâs mother said, appearing at her daughterâs elbow to smile down at her granddaughter.
Mrs. Whitehouse was a solid woman a little shorter than Maddie, with graying brown hair tamed into tight curls close to her head and blue eyes framed with bursts of smile lines. She was a soft-spoken woman and not the most demonstrative, but sheâd had a soft spot for the Hansen brothers when they were growing up. Sheâd always made them cakes on their birthdays, and checked in with them at church picnics, and hadnât scolded Jamison too harshly when he slipped a slug down her daughterâs dress or broke one of her beach umbrellas using it as a makeshift jousting pole.
As heâd grown older and more focused on his career, Jamison had fallen out of touch with both Mr. and Mrs. Whitehouseâexcept for a hello now and then when they ran into each other at massâbut he held out hope that they would think he was good enough for their daughter. He wanted to make a good second impression on Maddieâs parents. He knew he and Maddie had only been dating a short time, but in his unguarded moments, he hoped he and the Whitehouses might end up being even closer than they used to be.
âWant to drop my car off at the bakery and drive to my parentsâ together?â Maddie asked as Naomi and her mother moved toward the rear of the church, following the rest of the family and friends already making their way toward the parking lot.
Jamisonâs eyebrows lifted. âDoes that mean weâre coming out of the closet?â
âHa ha.â Maddie grinned. âNo. It means Mick is making whiskey sours before dinner and I would like to have a few and not drive. Is that acceptable?â
âOf course.â Jamison hummed happily as he started up the aisle beside her, fighting the urge to put his arm around her waist. âAnything that involves you and whiskey is on my list of favorite things.â
Maddie laughed. âYeah, well, Iâll do my best to behave. My parents get nervous when there are non-family-members around to observe my shenanigans. They donât want me to let my hair down too much.â
âI love it when you let your hair down,â Jamison said softly. âEspecially when you take all your clothes off and run into the ocean, first.â
Maddie spun around, walking backwards as she widened her eyes at him in a silent warning to cool it before they caught up with everyone else. He chuckled and
nodded, forcing himself to keep his eyes on anything but Maddie as they crossed themselves and stepped outside, waving to friends and family as they started down the stairs. He knew his feelings for her must be showing on his face. He didnât usually consider himself a transparent person, but heâd never loved anyone the way he loved Maddie.
What heâd felt for Wendy had been a pale imitation; he could see that now. It had been a crush on a friend that never should have gone as far as it did. A part of him wished he and Wendy were still friends, so he could call and apologize, but they hadnât spoken since the day she told him she was going to make it work with Art and walked out of his apartment in Atlanta.
Now, it seemed ridiculous that heâd been so depressed about losing Wendy. Wendy was a beautiful, sexy, intelligent woman, but she was no Maddie.
âSo Iâll see you at Icing in a few minutes?â Maddie asked when they reached his car.
âYes maâam,â Jamison said. âBut park behind the bakery if you can find a spot.â
âWhy?â Maddie asked, pausing to lift a hand to Naomi and Jake as they crossed the parking lot before turning back to him.
âBecause Iâm going to need to kiss you before we get to your parentsâ house,â he said, voice rough, âor thereâs no way Iâm going to be able to keep my hands off you all night.â
Maddie arched one brow, a naughty smile curving one side of her lips. âAs if one kiss is ever enough. I know what you want, Jamison Hansen. You want a quickie.â
Jamison smiled, feeling guilty, though that wasnât what heâd been thinking. âNot true. I said a kiss and I meant a kiss.â
Maddie hummed in a way that made it clear she wasnât buying anything he was selling. âI think youâre full of it, but I did tell Naomi I was planning to change out of my church clothes, so I donât suppose anyone will be suspicious if I arrive slightly rumpled in jeans and a Tee shirt.â
âNo,â Jamison said, suddenly wanting to prove to Maddie that he was more than a one trick pony. He loved getting naked with her, but he was also happy to spend a night enjoying her company, without any sex involved. âIâll take my kiss, and wait in the car while you change.â
Maddie frowned, an uncertain look creeping into her eyes. âWhy? Is something wrong?â
Jamison shook his head. âJust trying to be on my best behavior, and make a good second impression on your parents. Iâm sure theyâd rather have you at the party sooner rather than later.â
Maddie cocked her head to one side, regarding him thoughtfully for a moment before she nodded. âOkay. Then Iâll see you in a few, and Iâll stay in my dress and just grab more comfortable shoes.â
âGood,â he said, opening the door to the Mustang. âBecause you look beautiful in that dress.â
He got in and started the car, glancing into his rearview mirror in time to catch Maddie smiling a private smile before she turned and hurried to her car. It was a sweet, hopeful smile that made Jamisonâs heart feel lighter. She was in love with him, and if his gut wasnât telling lies, sheâd be coming out of the relationship closet with him the day after her sister said her âI doâs.â
CHAPTER ELEVEN
HALFWAY THROUGH HER first whiskey sour, Maddie snuck into her parentsâ kitchen and poured the rest of the drink down the drain.
Even with only a few sips in her, it was becoming obvious she wasnât going to be able to keep from outing herself and Jamison if she allowed any more whiskey to enter her bloodstream. He looked too good, smelled too good, oozed too much raw, sensual, smolder-liciousness as he leaned against the railing on her parentsâ back porch, a beer held lightly between his fingers and the setting sun catching the golden streaks in his hair.
He was like something straight out of a manly diet soda ad, or maybe a magazine advertisement for feminine lubricant or ribbed condoms or something naughty, but fun. He had taken sexy to an entirely new level tonight, and Maddieâs blood pressure was suffering as a result.
Jamison was smoking hot in a tee shirt and jeans, but in that black suit with the fitted waist and a muted silver tie, he looked good enough to devour whole.
Maddie couldnât keep her eyes off of him, couldnât keep from imagining all the trouble they could be getting up to with that silver tie if they were back in her apartment getting naked instead of hanging out at her parentsâ house, waiting for the roast beef her mother put in the oven an hour too late to finally reach a temperature that wouldnât give them all E. coli.
Sheâd teased Jamison about wanting a quickie, but now she was the one feeling itchy and unsettled, and wishing sheâd worked harder to convince him that showing up ten minutes late to her parentsâ house was no big deal.
âProbably becoming a sex addict,â Maddie mumbled as she fetched a light beer from the fridge.
âTalking to yourself?â Naomiâs voice came from behind her, making Maddie jump and her breath rush out.
âGeez,â she said, laughing as she shut the fridge door and turned to see Naomi refilling her lemonade glass from the glass dispenser on the island. âYou scared me.â
âIâm getting good at sneaking around,â Naomi said with a grin. âWhen Noelle is napping, I can walk by her room and down the hall without a single floorboard squeaking.â
âMotherhood is turning you into a ninja.â
âIt is,â Naomi agreed, glancing down at her lemonade glass before pinning Maddie with a more serious look. âAnd my ninja instincts are telling me something is wrong.â
Maddie frowned. âOther than the fact that Mom has no sense of timing when it comes to cooking meat and everyone is going to be wasted by the time dinner is served?â
âYeah, something more than that. Something moreâ¦Maddie flavored,â Naomi said, making Maddieâs heart lurch.
She should have known she wouldnât be able to hide the truth from Naomi for long. Naomi was like a bird of prey, sharp and focused and not the type to let the slightest sign of activity in her surroundings go uninvestigated, not even when she was sleep deprived and in the midst of organizing half a dozen major life events.
Maddie was preparing to spill her guts, and apologize for withholding information in the first place, when Naomi spoke again.
âAre you mad at me?â
Maddie blinked, surprised by the question âNo, of course not. Why would I be mad at you?â
âBecause Iâve been a crappy sister lately,â Naomi said, setting her drink on the island with a sigh. âIâve been so wrapped up in Jake and the baby that Iâm losing touch with other people. I realized on the way here that you and I havenât had a serious debriefing in weeks. I didnât even know that your friend Dawn was moving to Atlanta until Lucy mentioned something yesterday, and I canât remember the last time you bought a dress without at least texting me a picture first.â
âI mean, I love it,â Naomi hurried to add. âItâs perfect and you look beautiful, I justâ¦feel like maybe Iâve been sending out signals that Iâm not available to you and I feel rotten about it.â
âDonât feel rotten,â Maddie said, feeling guilty that Naomi felt guilty.
Their lack of debriefing was as much her fault as Naomiâs. Sheâd been so consumed by her new relationship with Jamison that sheâd been letting the rest of the world slip away.
âI know youâre busy, and Iâm not mad at all,â she continued. âI may not be a mom, but I know having a newborn is a full-time job all on its own, without everything else you have on your plate. There will be plenty of time for us to catch up once Noelle is sleeping through the night and youâve recovered from all the christening planning and wedding planning and honeymoon planning and all the other
planning.â
Naomi nodded, but her forehead was still furrowed. âI know, but I donât like feeling like thereâs distance between us.â
Maddie crossed the room, setting her beer down to pull Naomi into her arms for a hug. âThere, now thereâs no distance.â
Naomi hugged her back, her laughter stirring Maddieâs hair. âI love you, Mad.â
âI love you too,â Maddie said, a wave of emotion making her chest tight as she gave Naomi a last hard squeeze.
âIâm glad youâre my babyâs godmother.â Naomi sniffed as they pulled away. âYou looked so perfect holding her today. I kept thinking about when we were little and went to Mickâs christening and promised weâd be godmothers for each otherâs babies when we grew up. Remember that?â
Maddie nodded, eyes beginning to sting. âI do.â
Naomi sniffed again. âI almost cried three times during the ceremony and twice on the way home.â
âMe too,â Maddie said. âAnd if you donât stop with the sweet memories Iâm definitely going to start crying now.â
Naomi laughed, blinking her eyes as she squeezed Maddieâs hand. âOkay, Iâll stop being sappy. I justâ¦I appreciate you. I feel blessed to have you as my sister. I feel so good knowing Noelle will have an amazing person like you in her life.â
âCrap, that did it,â Maddie said, tears spilling down her cheeks even as she and Naomi both started to laugh.
âIâm sorry,â Naomi said, giggling and sniffing as she pulled Maddie in for another hug. âI canât help it. Iâm so emotional lately.â
Maddie pulled in a shaky breath, trying to stop the tears before her nose turned red. âItâs okay, but Iâve got to pull myself together. Iâm all out of waterproof mascara; Iâm wearing the cheap stuff that stings my eyes if it runs.â
âWell, weâre going to have to fix that before the wedding.â Naomi pulled away with a businesslike nod before reaching out to grab two napkins from the stack on the kitchen island and pressing them into Maddieâs hand. âIâll order you some of the stuff I use from my friend in Miami. Itâs waterproof, but not clumpy and it comes off with the tiniest bit of eye makeup remover.â