by Violet Duke
âSounds great,â Maddie said, smiling as she put her arm around Naomiâs waist. âNow letâs go see if I can get mom to kick that roast up twenty degrees.â
âSounds good.â Naomi hesitated, forehead wrinkling again as she leaned into Maddie and sniffed.
âWhat?â Maddie laughed. âDo I need new deodorant, too? It was hotter in the church than I thought it would be.â
Naomi shook her head. âNo, itâs justâ¦you smell like Jamisonâs cologne.â
Maddieâs heart leapt back into her throat. âI do? Thatâs weird.â She shrugged. âMaybe it soaked into my clothes on the ride over.â
Or while I was rubbing all over him behind the bakery with my tongue halfway down his throat…
Naomi nodded. âThat must be it.â She chuckled as she turned to grab her lemonade. âItâs just so funny. Back in high school you could always tell who Jamison had been making out with at a party by the smell. I donât know what kind of cologne he wears, but itâs distinctive.â
âI think he smells nice,â Maddie heard herself saying before she thought the better of it, but thankfully Naomi didnât seem to think it was a strange thing to say.
âOh, me too,â she agreed. âAnd heâs been much friendlier lately. I think weâre finally turning the awkwardness corner.â
Maddie nodded and hummed in agreement, not wanting to think about the awkwardness that might emerge between her and Naomi once the truth about her and Jamison came out. Surely Naomi wouldnât care that lips that had touched her lips were now touching Maddieâs lips, or that Maddie had fudged the truth a little in an effort to make sure Naomi remained the focus of her special day. Naomi was understanding when it came to the right to keep private things private, and hopefully sheâd see how good Maddie and Jamison were together and simply be glad two people she cared about had found happiness.
Maddie followed Naomi back out onto the porchâexerting an impressive amount of willpower to keep from glancing over at Jamisonâand in a few minutes they had succeeded in coaxing their mother into turning up the heat on the roast. A half hour later, dinner was served. The older set claimed the table for eight in the Whitehousesâ dining room, while the twenty-somethings crowded around the stools at the island, and the thirty and forty-somethings took their plates out to the patio set on the back porch.
Maddie found herself wedged between her cousin Albert, who had started his family early and had two teenaged daughters at the ripe old age of thirty-seven, and her cousin Deidre, who at thirty-eight was preparing to send her sole offspring, Evelyn, off to college in the fall.
Maddie did her best to make small talk, but she didnât have much in common with her cousins and hearing them talk about reaching the end of their child-rearing years while she had yet to embark on hers had her feeling a little maudlin by the end of the meal. Come her birthday in a few days, they would all be in their thirties, but she was at such a different stage of life. It was a good stageâMaddie loved her tiny apartment and the freedom to take off with Jamison on an adventure whenever she wantedâbut she couldnât help but feel like the window of opportunity was closing.
By the time she and Jamison said their goodbyes and headed out to his car, she was feeling low, though she couldnât really pin down the reason for it. After all, she was closer to moving forward with happily ever after than she had been in a long timeâshe and Jamison were falling in love and she sensed they were headed for some kind of commitmentâbut for some reason she couldnât shake the feeling that she was wasting time when she should be seriously thinking about the future.
âWhat do you mean?â Jamison asked when she confessed how she was feeling on the ride home. âYou think you and I are a waste of time?â
âNo, no,â Maddie hurried to assure him. âI just, I donât knowâ¦â
âYes, you do.â Jamison braked at a red light and glanced over at her, a no-nonsense look in his eye. âTell me whatâs bothering you. I want us to be honest with each other, Maddie.â
âI am being honest,â she said, realizing the words were a lie as soon as she spoke them aloud. She did know what was bothering her; she was just too chicken to say it aloud. If she did, and Jamison said he never wanted to have kids that would be it for their relationship.
But she had decided not to let fear rule her, and so she forced herself to say what she was thinking. âThe christening and being around my cousins who are only a little older than I am, but already have grown kids⦠It got me to thinking.â
âAbout?â Jamison asked, his eyes returning to the road as they moved out of her parentsâ subdivision.
âAbout what I want for the future,â Maddie said, the fact that Jamisonâs focus was elsewhere making it easier to get the words out. âIâm having so much fun with you, and I care about you, butâ¦I want to have kids someday. And probably someday not too far from this day, if you get what Iâm saying.â
Jamison nodded, but didnât say a word as he took the turn that would eventually deposit them near downtown Summerville.
âI mean, Iâm going to be thirty in a few days,â she pushed on, the fact that heâd declined to respond making her nervous. âIâm already past my peak fertility and donât say Iâm not because I know I am. People may be having babies later these days, but that doesnât mean itâs always easy for them, and after the trouble Naomi had I donât know how hard it will be for me to get pregnant or stay pregnant.â
Jamison nodded again, but still didnât respond, sending Maddieâs anxiety level ratcheting up another notch.
âI mean, I donât know for sure that fertility problems run in our family, but they could,â she babbled on. âAnd I donât have the funds to adopt a baby the way Naomi has. I mean, I know sheâd loan me the money or just give me the money if I asked her for it, but I donât want her money. And I really do want to at least try to have a baby of my own. Because Iâve been wanting to have a baby since I was twenty-four and that biological clock thing is pretty intense. And if you donât say something soon Iâm going to assume that you never want children, or maybe just never want to imagine having children with me and Iâm going to jump out of the car at the next intersection and walk the rest of the way home.â
âWhy donât you stay in the car,â Jamison said, lips twitching. âWeâre only two blocks from the bakery and then Iâll be able to park and give this question the attention it deserves. Iâd rather look at you than the road while Iâm talking about something like this, if thatâs okay.â
âOh, oh okay,â Maddie stammered, twining her purse strap around and around one finger as Jamison pulled down the road, every second that passed making her more uneasy.
Why would he want to look at her while they talked unless he was going to be giving her bad news? Maybe sheâd been wrong about how serious things were getting between them. Maybe sheâd misjudged the way heâd looked at her at the christening, with that light in his eyes that said he was thinking about what it might be like to have a baby together, too.
By the time Jamison finally pulled to a stop in front of Icing, Maddieâs jaw was clenched and the back of her tongue cramping with anxiety.
âJust lay it on me,â she said, turning to him as soon as he cut off the engine. âI canât stand the suspense.â
âOkay.â Jamison took a deep breath as he shifted in his seat. âWell I figure it will be at least a month before we can start trying.â
Maddie caught her breath in surprise before she realized what he was doing and frowned. âIâm serious, Jamison. I know itâs early to be talking about something like this, but I need to know whether you want to have kids s
omeday, with whoever you end up with. It doesnât have to be with me in particular, butââ
âTough,â he said, breaking in. âBecause I donât want to have kids with anyone but you. And I wasnât joking. If youâre ready to start trying, I say we do it. But you have to be off the pill for at least a month before you can get pregnant, isnât that right?â
Maddieâs mouth opened, then closed, then opened, then closed again, but she couldnât for the life of her think of what to say. Jamison couldnât be for realâ¦could he?
âYouâre serious?â she asked after a moment of silence, her voice hoarse with disbelief.
He nodded.
âThis is a child, Jamison,â she said, doing her best to get through to him. âItâs not a casual commitment. Itâs forever, whether you and I decide weâre sick of each other or not.â
Jamison smiled as if she were the one being ridiculous. âI know, Maddie. Iâm in love with you, you goofball. Donât you get that by now?â
Maddie started to protest, but stopped herself. She did know that. Sheâd known it for a while now, felt it every time he kissed her, sensed it floating in the air around them, making even the most ordinary moments feel magical.
âAnd Iâm not getting any younger, either,â Jamison continued, holding her gaze with an intensity that made it clear he wasnât joking. âIâm not saying we really have to jump into anything right now, butâ¦yeah, I want to get married, have kids, and a family and I want to do that with you. Because I love you, Maddie.â
âYou do?â she asked, because she wanted to hear it again.
âI do,â he confirmed. âI love you so much it hurts.â
Maddie pressed her lips together, fighting tears for what felt like the tenth time that day. âBut not in the bad way, right?â
Jamison reached out to take her hand. âIn the best way. In the way that makes me know Iâm finally doing the love thing right, and I donât ever want to stop.â
âYou promise?â she said, swallowing past the lump in her throat. âYouâre not going to fall in love with a sexy lifeguard named Craig and leave me?â
Jamison smiled as he gave her fingers a squeeze. âIâm not a cheater, Maddie. Iâve never cheated on any woman I was serious with and I was never as serious about any of them as I am about you.â He paused to roll his eyes. âBesides, it should be pretty obvious by now that Iâm batting for your team. All the way. Not even a little bit interested in anyone elseâs love-rod.â
Maddie snorted. âLove-rod. I canât believe I ever said that out loud.â
He smiled. âI can. You say some funny stuff. Itâs one of the things I like about you.â
Maddie pulled in a deep breath, but it didnât ease the tightness in her chest. She had a feeling there was only one thing that could, a few words that no longer felt quite as scary.
âWell, thenâ¦I guess I love you, too,â she said, the tension within her beginning to ebb away.
âYou guess?â he asked in a teasing voice, making Maddie grin.
âI know,â she amended. âI know I love you and your love-rod and Iâm glad weâve decided to think about making babies together in the not too distant future, but also not too near future, either, because Iâm having a lot of fun having kinky sex adventures with you and that will be more difficult to manage with a baby.â
âDitto,â he said, laughing. âNow can we go upstairs? Iâve been fantasizing about tying you to your headboard with this tie all night.â
Maddieâs eyes widened. âI was thinking the same thing!â
âGreat minds,â Jamison said in his sexiest voice, leaning over to kiss her before whispering against her lips, âNow letâs get upstairs and get naked.â
Minutes later, they were. And it was kinky and sexy and fun, but it was also special, sacred, and a night Maddie knew she would never forget.
CHAPTER TWELVE
THE ONLY THING more stressful than going into a jewelry store to buy an engagement ring for a woman youâre secretly dating is running into the womanâs brother while youâre bent over the display case.
As soon as Mick Whitehouse swung through the door of Leonardâs, Jamison did his best to slink past him without being spotted, but it was no use. The store was small and he and Mick were easily the tallest people in it by a good six inches. It was apparently âlittle old ladies come into town to get their rings cleanedâ day and half the tiny, blue-haired women in Summerville were milling around the cases while waiting for their jewelry to be returned, making Jamison and Mick stand out like bulls in a china shop.
âMick, whatâs up?â Jamison said when their eyes connected, trying not to look as exposed as he felt. He joined Mick near the entrance, where the midday sun beat through the glass doors forming a rectangle of heat on the thick carpet. Thank god he hadnât asked the man behind the counter to take anything out of the case yet, or else heâd really be screwed.
âUm nothing,â Mick said, looking a little off-kilter himself. âI was coming to look for something forâ¦Maddie. For her birthday. Itâs tomorrow.â
âYeah, I know,â Jamison said then hurried to add. âShe said something about it when I was over getting croissants for the station earlier. Your sisters make the best chocolate croissants.â
Mick nodded. âThe plain ones are good, too. Theyâve got this lemon and sugar crust on the bottom thatâs pretty amazing.â
Jamison nodded. âIâll have to try those.â He ran a hand through his hair, struggling to think up a good reason for him to be nosing around a jewelry store. âI was just looking for something for my aunt,â he finally said, unable to pull up another female family member on the spur of the moment.
Mick frowned. âThe one with the shotgun collection?â
âI figured Iâd go in a different direction for her this year.â Jamison silently cursed himself for forgetting how well the Whitehouses knew his family. âIt feels like time to try something more traditional.â
âOr you could get her a shotgun charm,â Mick said, still lingering near the door, making no move to step further into the shop. âI got Faith a firefighterâs hat charm while we were in New Orleans. She really likes it, even though she doesnât usually wear jewelry. I bet you could find something like that online.â
Jamison let his brows draw together as if he was seriously considering the suggestion. âThat could work. Thanks, man. Iâll check that out.â Jamison was preparing to say his goodbyes and flee the store until it was safe to come back and shop without being observed when the dark-haired man with the tiny moustache behind the counter called Mickâs name.
âMr. Whitehouse, the ring has been sized and is ready to go,â the man said, smiling brightly as he lifted an arm in welcome. âJust let me grab it from the back.â
Mick nodded, shooting Jamison a panicked look out of the corner of his eye. âGreat. Thatâs great.â He turned to Jamison as he began edging further into the store. âGuess Iâd better go get that.â
Jamison fought the urge to smile. âSure thing. Iâll see you around.â He reached for the door. âHope Maddie likes her present.â
âUm, yeah, me too. Later,â Mick said, looking relieved that Jamison wouldnât be sticking around to overhear anything more about the ring he was allegedly picking up âfor Maddie.â
Maddie, my ass, Jamison thought as he stepped outside and wandered across the pedestrian walkway that made this part of Main Street one of the busiest shopping centers in town. He knew who that ring was for, and it certainly wasnât Mickâs sister. As Jamison eased into the shade beneath
the ice cream shopâs pink and green awning to wait for Mick to exit Leonardâs, he wondered if Mick was planning to ask Faith to marry him tonight.
Jamison had planned to wait until Maddieâs birthday tomorrow to ask her, but maybe he should go ahead and do it that night. That way Maddie and Mick would have a good story to tell the grandkidsâabout the night they both got engaged at the same timeâand Jamison wouldnât have to worry about the off-chance that Mick would say something to Maddie about seeing him at the jewelry store and ruin the surprise.
He didnât think there was too much risk of that, but a part of him was looking for an excuse to ask Maddie and put an end to the suspense. He had a pretty good feeling sheâd say yesâtheyâd decided to start trying for a baby in six months, around Thanksgiving, and Jamison assumed sheâd want to be married before thenâbut he couldnât deny heâd feel a hell of a lot more relaxed when Maddie had his ring on her finger.
His ring. He was getting ready to dump a couple thousand dollars on a ring for Maddie Whitehouse. Heâd spent half his life pulling her pigtails, and been too stupid to see how perfect she was for him for years, and now she was his best friend and soon to be his wife.
It was crazy, and wonderful, and Jamison suddenly knew he wouldnât be able to wait until tomorrow. As soon as the ring was in his hand, he was going straight to the bakery.
It should be five oâclock by then, and maybe Lucy would leave the back door open and he would be able to sneak up Maddieâs stairs and leave a surprise on her landing again. But this time, the surprise wouldnât be a shot of whiskey and a bad poem, it would be him, down on one knee.
The moment the thought went through his head, Mick swung through the door to Leonardâs, slipping his sunglasses on as he started down Main Street toward the fire station, a jewelry bag dangling from one hand. Jamison silently wished the younger man good luck, waiting until Mick was out of sight before heading back into the store. He returned to the engagement ring section, not surprised to find his attention drawn to the same ring heâd noticed before.