by Lea Hart
Scratching his face, Dr. Jacobsen shrugged. “That’s where it gets interesting. You have some options. The results don’t give us a clear-cut answer either way.”
“I thought shoulders either worked or they didn’t,” Blake responded.
“If you were a civilian, that would be true. And for many other branches of the military, that would be true as well. But SEALs are a completely different animal. What your job requires tests the boundaries of the human body.” Glancing at the chart, he shook his head. “Twelve years on the Teams have almost worn yours out.”
“What are you saying, Doc?”
Holding up his hands, the doctor shook his head. “Let me rephrase. You are in prime physical condition, and you can do whatever you want to do. But being on the Teams may not be in your best interests.”
“You have to explain that to me,” Blake said. What the hell was going on? He wasn’t getting any answers. He was only getting riddles.
“Let me start at the beginning. The surgery we performed on your shoulder was successful. You have full range of motion, and your muscles can support almost any activity you choose to engage in. But…I can’t give you a clear answer on how it’s going to hold up in combat. A fast rope under adverse conditions could tear it to shreds and leave us few options. If you get shot again, then I have little hope of putting it back together. I’m guessing that you’ll get thrown in a blast, and if you land incorrectly, then your shoulder can’t be rebuilt. What I’m trying to say is that under normal circumstances, you have a fully operational shoulder. Under SEAL circumstances, you are one op away from losing the function of your shoulder in any meaningful way.”
Sitting back, Blake took a deep breath. It wasn’t a surprise, but it wasn’t easy to hear either. “So, if I go back out, I risk the loss of my shoulder. Forever.”
“Yes. I know what your job entails, and I can say with all certainty that it’s not a question of if but of when.”
“So, that’s it?”
“I wish I had a better answer for you. We’ve reconstructed it three times, and it’s my belief that the last injury isn’t going to allow us another shot when it happens again.”
“Where does that leave me?” Blake asked.
“You can do almost anything you want. Except be an active SEAL. I’ve had a lot of men go on to become instructors, and of course there all kinds of private sector options. The best way to describe your opportunities is to say you can do anything but be in spec ops.”
“Twelve years is a long time,” Blake said. “Shit, I didn’t think I would last five.”
Leaning forward, the doctor steepled his fingers. “Truth be told, with the heavy rotations you and your brothers have been on, five years is a blessing. Everything has changed in the last ten years. Everything we knew about a warrior’s body is being redefined. Never before have we put our spec ops community through this type of marathon. When I started, SEALs might have been involved in a half-dozen direct action missions a year. How many did you have during your last rotation?”
“A lot more than six,” Blake said as he shook his head.
“Exactly. Everything has changed out there but the human body. It can take only so much before it falls apart. It’s been my mission to keep as many men in one piece as I can.” Glancing down at the file, he smiled. “I see that you’ve spent some time down at NAB. Maybe you should get the next set of warriors ready.”
Standing, Blake put out his hand. “Thank you, Doctor. I appreciate everything you’ve done.”
Dr. Jacobsen stood and shook hands. “Thank you for your service. It’s not over yet. It’s just going to take on a different form.”
Blake nodded and walked out of the office. As prepared as he was, he was still in shock. His career as a lieutenant commander on the Teams had just ended.
***
Blake sat in the Salty Dog bar and enjoyed his beer. Mark, Travis, Chris, and Max were playing pool, and he watched the game progress. This was the first bar he’d visited after securing his own Hell Week way back when, and it seemed like an appropriate place to commemorate the end. Laird and David walked in and sat on either side of him. “Thanks for coming.”
“Wouldn’t miss it,” David said. “How does it feel to be old and washed up?”
“Don’t know. Can you give me any pointers, since you’ve been that way for a couple of years?”
Laird ordered them a round and then laughed. “I’m enjoying the hell out of retirement. I don’t get shot nearly as much, and I still get access to all the fun toys. Last week I was hanging out of a chopper as we left a snatch and grab, so my days are not all that different.” Leaning back, he pulled out his phone and held it up. “Except this is what I go home to every night.”
Blake looked at the picture of Lexi and Bella and for the first time understood what his friend had been yammering on about for the last year. “Not a bad trade-off.”
“Hell, there’s no trade-off,” Laird responded. “I’m on the winning side of life right now. Do you know what my beautiful wife asked me before I left this morning?”
“I have no idea.” Blake shook his head and waited.
“She asked me if I wanted anything special for dinner.” Crossing his arms, he grinned like an idiot. “The most perfect girl in the world loves me and wants to make me something special for dinner.” Rapping his knuckles on the bar, he laughed. “I won the fucking lottery.”
Blake let out a snort and slapped his friend on the back. Six months ago, he would’ve listened to the story and thought his friend was off his rocker. But not today. Today he completely understood. Somewhere in the last month, he’d crossed the line. He was now one of the poor saps that he’d always felt sorry for. The ones he’d never understood until he met Paige.
David’s phone rang, and he pulled it out and smiled. “Got to take this. It’s my wife.”
Blake watched him walk away and shook his head. “Still can’t believe there’s someone in the world who married him.”
Laird drained his beer. “Not only married him but about to have his baby. I think Jane is due at the end of summer.”
“Same as Paige. Our son is due the second week of September.”
Laird set down his glass and laughed. “I guess you ended up using the info I put together.”
The pool game ended, and the rest of the guys walked back over. Laird signaled to the bartender. “We need another round. My friend is not only retiring but also becoming a daddy.”
Blake dragged his hand down his face. “Thanks for stealing my thunder, man. I was going to wait until we all sat down together.”
Max slapped him on the back. “Congratulations. You’re about to give up sleep on a permanent basis. You think BUD/S was hard? Wait till you’re a father. That’s when the real test begins.”
Mark leaned against the bar. “I’m going to take a moment and bask in the glory of my success. Clearly, it was my advice that helped you find a life outside the Teams.” Giving the group a satisfied smile, he lifted his beer. “Good for you. It’s going to be the best thing that ever happened to you.”
Blake lifted his beer and saluted his friends. It had been one of the toughest days of his life, but it also felt like a new beginning. His career had ended, but it wasn’t the end of the world. Because he was going to build a new life with Paige. “Thanks, man. I think this is the easiest part of the journey.”
Chris snorted loudly. “That’s the truth. Wait till your kid gets here and you realize you’ll never have another easy breath for the rest of your life.”
Travis gave each man a pitying look. “Girls are the true test. I’m about to have two, and I’m not looking forward to the day a boy knocks on my door and wants to take one of them out.”
“There’s an easy solution to that,” Mark said with confidence. “It’s called parochial school. I’ve already got Maddy’s all-girl high school picked out.”
“Twins are the answer,” Max added. “My daughter has a built-in bodyguard
. There isn’t anyone who’s going to get past Alex. Gemma is going to be just fine. Now, with the second boy, we’ve got backup.”
David rejoined the group and looked around. “What did I miss?”
“Nothing,” Mark said. “We’ve been talking about kids for the last twenty minutes. Blake is joining the ranks. Paige is due the same time as Jane.”
“Congratulations. When are we going to meet your lady?” David asked.
“Maybe next week. I haven’t spoken to her all day. We keep missing each other. She had her amnio yesterday and wasn’t up to talking. The doctor recommended it after her last ultrasound.” Lifting his hand, he checked his watch. “I left her a message to call so I can let her know what’s going on.”
“When you talk to her, tell her you already have a job. I hope you’re going to come over to SAI,” Max said.
“Thanks for the job offer. I will definitely keep it in mind. I may end up in Texas, so we’ll have to see.”
“Great,” Max responded. “Did you ever have Ryan Cordell on one of your platoons?”
“He was on one several years ago,” Blake responded.
“He retired almost a year ago and went to work for Joel and Grady. It didn’t last long because he fell for the company’s vice president of operations. They ended up opening an office in Austin, and they need operators. So if you decide to stay in your home state, you can go work with him and Ivy.”
“Damn, it’s a small world. Paige went to school with Ivy, and they’re good friends. She told me about her and her SEAL husband, but I didn’t put it all together,” Blake responded.
“One way or another, we’ve got you covered. San Diego or Texas, take your pick,” Max said with a laugh. “Soon we’re going to have an office in every major city.”
“Lots to think about,” Blake said. “I guess I better talk to Paige and see what she thinks.” Pulling out his phone, he sent off a quick text and figured they would talk first thing in the morning. They had a whole life to figure out, and he wanted to start as soon as possible.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Thursday, May 4
The doorbell rang, and Paige looked at her front door. It seemed awfully far away, and she didn’t think she was going to make it. For some reason, she was under the weather today, and her energy was almost nonexistent. Maybe she had picked up a bug or something because she felt like she was getting the flu. “Who is it?” she called as loudly as she could.
“Paige, it’s Mama. Are you feeling all right?”
“Use your key. I’m too tired to come to the door.” Within ten seconds, the door flew open and Paige saw her mother’s worried face.
“Sweet girl, why didn’t you call me?” Faye bustled into the house and dropped her purse. “Do you have a fever?”
“Maybe. I think I caught the flu. I’m tired and achy.”
“Let’s check your temperature, then I’ll get your juice.”
“Mama, can you make me some Jell-O? I haven’t eaten anything all day, and it’s the only thing that sounds good.”
“Oh, dear. I don’t like the sound of that. When my girls lose their appetites, something is seriously wrong.” Picking up her bag, she pulled out her phone. “I’m going to have Grammy run by Kroger and pick some up. If I make it for you, it won’t be ready for a couple of hours. Anything else you want, sugar?”
“No, Mama.”
Faye rested her hand on her daughter’s head and grimaced. “You’re burning up.”
“Can I have some ice in my juice? Maybe that’ll help.”
“Of course.”
Paige watched her mama hustle into the kitchen with the phone glued to her ear. As much as she complained about her mama’s overbearing ways, she sure appreciated them when she wasn’t feeling good. It didn’t matter that she was twenty-eight. She still needed to be taken care of on occasion. Her phone beeped. She picked it up and saw that Blake had texted her again. Flipping it over, she decided to text him back later. Her head was swimming and she didn’t feel up to it.
Moments later, Faye came back with a tall glass of iced juice and a thermometer. “Sit up a little and let me see how hot you are.”
Paige slipped the thermometer in and waited the requisite amount of time. Her mama pulled the thermometer out and read it with a frown.
“What does it say?”
Before her mama answered, she handed Paige the glass of juice. “It says you have a temperature of a hundred and one. I’m going to call your doctor and see what he thinks. Maybe it has something to do with the amnio you had yesterday.”
Paige took a sip of her juice and then shrugged. “I doubt it.” She flipped her braid over her shoulder and smoothed it down. “But call the doctor if it’ll make you feel better.”
“A fever is not something to fool around with. I’ll call Dr. Nelson and see what he says.”
“I think I’ll close my eyes for a bit.” Sliding down on the couch, Paige rested her head against the pillow and looked at the pictures in her bookcase. There were six in her immediate line of sight. They were all of Blake and her. When the first picture appeared weeks ago, she thought it was sweet. Then, when he’d placed twelve all around the house, she wondered if it was crazy. He certainly was marking his spot in her life. Closing her eyes, she inhaled deeply and could still pick up his scent on the pillow. It was the one he’d slept on, and she hadn’t washed the pillowcase since he left. Just like the sweatshirt she now wore around the house. It was silly, but it was all she had to hold on to.
The last thought she had before sleep took over was how much she missed him. The very thing she had been most fearful about had happened. She was attached to him and missed him like crazy.
Four weeks together was all it had taken for him to find a permanent place in her heart. What that would eventually mean was still a mystery.
***
Rolling over, Paige kicked off the blanket and vaguely wondered why she was in a sauna. Opening one eye, she saw her mama’s and grammy’s worried faces staring at her. Her head was pounding and she felt nauseated. “Mama, I don’t feel well.”
Faye knelt next to her daughter and ran a damp cloth over her forehead. “Honey, do you want to try to get into a cool bath?”
“I don’t know.” Running her hand over her T-shirt, she discovered it was soaked. “Maybe a shower. I’m hotter than a biscuit.”
Grammy pulled out her phone. “I’m going to call Dr. Nelson again. I think this is more than the flu.”
“Good idea,” Faye responded. Holding out her arms, she helped Paige stand. “Let’s see if we can get you cooled off. If we can’t, then we’re taking you to the hospital.”
“I can’t go to the hospital for a fever, Mama. They would laugh me right out of the place.”
“Paige, you will listen to me and not fuss. Having a fever when you’re pregnant is not something to take lightly.”
“Okay.” Taking one step, Paige realized how unsteady she was on her feet. The dizziness had gotten worse, and she wondered if maybe Mama was right. “Don’t walk too fast, because I feel like the floor is moving.”
“When was the last time you ate?”
“I don’t remember. I guess yesterday before the amnio. I haven’t been hungry.” They slowly walked down the hall, and Paige put her hand against it to steady herself. “I take that back. I had an apple last night and a cup of tea.”
“Something is definitely wrong,” Faye responded as they stepped into the bathroom. “Let’s get you in the shower and see if that helps.”
Paige stood still as her mama help her get undressed. “I think I can take it from here.”
“I’ll get you some clean clothes and then I’ll wait for you to finish.”
“Okay,” Turning the water on, Paige stepped in and sat down on the bench inside the shower. As the water flowed over her, she leaned her head against the wall and closed her eyes.
***
Faye shook her daughter’s shoulder. “Paige, honey.” Nothing, n
o response. “Paige, wake up, honey.”
Grammy walked in and gasped. “I’m calling for an ambulance.”
“Hurry, Mama. Our baby girl is in bad shape.”
Faye turned off the water and grabbed a big towel. Drying Paige off as best she could, she tried lifting her and couldn’t. “Come on, Paige, honey, open those pretty eyes of yours and let’s get you out of the shower.”
Faye felt her daughter stir and gave her a little shake. “That’s it, baby.”
In a low voice, Paige responded, “Mama, my head hurts.”
“I know. Can you stand? I need to get you out of the shower and dressed.” A small nod was all she got from her daughter. Somehow Faye managed to get her out of the shower, and she set her down on the toilet. Wrapping her up in a towel, she dried her quickly.
Grammy returned and shook her head. “The ambulance is on the way. Let me hold her while you get her some clothes. Those paramedics don’t need to see her in her birthday suit.”
“Hold on tight, Mama, or she’ll fall over.”
“Don’t you worry. I am not going to let anything happen to my granddaughter.”
Faye scooted out of the bathroom and started opening drawers. “Why in the world are Blake’s clothes still in the drawers?” she asked as she pulled out clean underwear. After grabbing a T-shirt and yoga pants, she returned. “Let’s get these on her.”
“My goodness, what in world has happened? It must have something to do with the amnio. I can’t imagine what else it would be,” Grammy muttered to herself as she held Paige up.
“I’m going in the ambulance. I want you to follow in the car. Call Phillip and then the girls,”
“Should we call Blake and let him know what’s going on?” Grammy asked as she helped put the T-shirt on. “He is the daddy, after all.”