The Longing Within (Desire for Discipline Book 3)

by Kole, Isabella

  “That would be awesome, thanks, baby,” he said. “I know you’re tired, so I’ll let you get some rest. I love you.”

  “And I love you,” she said in a voice barely above a whisper. “Goodnight, John.”

  “Sweet dreams, we’ll talk again over the weekend.”

  She was asleep within minutes. The next day was just as hectic as the others had been and she was glad when she finally was able to lock up her office and leave at six. She had accomplished a lot in the ten hours she had put in and she was ready for a nice dinner out. She had decided to treat herself and enjoyed a quiet dinner alone at one of her favorite restaurants before going home to her messy apartment and overflowing laundry hamper. She took one look at the chaos that greeted her and headed for the sanctuary of her bathtub. After another long soak in the tub, she curled up in bed with a book and read until she fell asleep.

  Up early the next morning, she began the chores that had waited for her another day. By mid-afternoon, the laundry was done and the clutter had been removed, the apartment had been vacuumed, dusted and scrubbed and Lyndsey was ready for a break. She sat down with a cup of coffee and a sandwich before heading to the shower. If she could get to the grocery store and restock her cupboards, she would be free for the rest of the weekend. She picked up her cell and dialed John’s number.

  “Hi, baby, how are you?” she asked when he answered.

  “I’m good. You sound much better than you did the other night,” he commented.

  “I feel much better. I got a lot finished at work yesterday, got a good night’s rest and have all my chores done, except for shopping, which I plan to do after I talk with you and grab a quick shower.”

  “I’m proud of you,” he said with a chuckle. “I still wish I could be there to help you out.”

  “That would be heavenly. I can envision you cooking me dinner tonight,” she said with a giggle. “Pasta with your special marinara sauce, maybe a salad and bread sticks, and of course dessert,” she added.

  “You know if I could, I would do that,” he answered. “I especially like the dessert part.”

  “I really just wanted to say hi. I finally sat down to a cup of coffee and a sandwich.”

  “Sweetheart, you really need to take care of yourself. I see I’m going to have my work cut out for me.”

  “I plan to phone Jill tomorrow about the office space. I’ll let you know what she says. Bryan and Janis won’t be back until next week. They took two weeks off.”

  “Lucky them, I’d love to whisk you away for a break,” he said.

  “Once I get through this deadline, I might agree to that,” she teased.

  “Has Maeve made any more wedding plans for us?” he asked.

  “I haven’t talked to her all week. I may run by there while I’m out and touch base with her.”

  “What are your plans for the rest of the weekend?” he asked.

  “I plan to relax.”

  “Good girl. Now, think about that little weekend getaway I mentioned. Maybe we can work that in soon. I’ve got to run. I’m playing golf with some buddies of mine in about a half an hour.”

  “I’ll think about it. Enjoy your game.”

  “I love you.”

  “Love you. Bye for now,” she whispered into the phone as they ended the call.

  She cleaned up her dishes and ran to the bathroom for a quick, hot shower. Dressing in jeans and a cool summer top, she slipped her feet into a pair of sandals and grabbed her list and purse. She drove to Franklin and pulled into the driveway of the Walsh home. She stood on the porch and waited after ringing the doorbell. Bob came to the door. “Lyndsey, sweetheart, come on in,” he said in greeting. “Maeve was just saying earlier she hadn’t heard from you since the wedding.”

  “It’s been a rather crazy week at the office. I was running out to buy groceries and thought I’d swing by here first to see if Maeve needs help with anything wedding related. She’d probably going nuts, straight from finishing Bryan’s wedding to full steam ahead on mine.”

  “You can bet your bottom dollar she loves every minute of it,” he said with a chuckle as he led her into the kitchen where Maeve was pulling a roast out of the oven.

  “Oh, Lyndsey, you’re just in time for dinner.”

  “Actually, I had a sandwich a bit ago. I was going grocery shopping and thought I’d come by to see the two of you first.”

  “Nonsense, a sandwich isn’t a meal. You’ll sit down and at least have a bite of meat and veggies with us.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Lyndsey replied with a laugh. “After the week I’ve had, a good home-cooked meal sounds heavenly.”

  “You sit right down and I’ll have it on the table in a jiffy. I want to hear all about your busy week. I have a few things to go over with you too.”

  “I figured you would. Bryan’s wedding turned out wonderfully, don’t you think?” she asked as she sat down in the familiar kitchen. Casual meals were taken in the kitchen at the Walsh’s, the dining room being reserved for special occasions.

  “Bryan’s and Janis’s wedding was splendid. I know she was a nervous wreck, but there was no need. Everything went off without a hitch. Her mother was such a dear to work with.”

  “I hate it you have to plan mine alone. I’ll try and help as much as I can. John asked earlier on the phone how it was going, by the way.”

  “Oh, sweetheart, I’m enjoying every minute of it. I got some menus this week for the reception meal and I need your input.” Maeve set the food on the table and sat down.

  After Bob said grace, they began discussing the menus. When that had been decided, taking into consideration what John would prefer, the conversation shifted to her week.

  “Why was your week so hectic?” Bob asked.

  “We have a huge deadline looming. One of our major clients is being a bit testy and nothing seemed to go right. I worked late every night and finally, yesterday, things began to fall into place.”

  “I would imagine since your clientele is mainly authors, they could get a bit testy occasionally.”

  “Oh, this one has fought us every step of the way, from the editing, to the cover, to the release date. I’ve been tempted to terminate his contract, but he is big news, so that’s not a good idea.”

  “Do you like what you do, dear?” Maeve asked.

  “I do, for the most part. I’ve been in publishing for several years now, since I graduated college.”

  “But, it wasn’t what you set out to do when you got a degree in Journalism,” Maeve pointed out.

  “That’s true, but the idea of writing the great American novel was a pipedream. Once I graduated, I knew I had to do something else with my degree.”

  “Have you ever considered writing for a magazine or a newspaper?” Bob asked.

  “Not recently, no. Just because my job is stressful, I’m not ready to throw in the towel. I really like where I am. It doesn’t make much sense to start a new phase of the career when I’m getting married soon. Too many changes at once, don’t you think?” she asked.

  “All the same, keep your options open. If you and John ever decide to start a family, these late hours you keep might be a problem. If you were writing, your time might be more flexible,” Maeve pointed out.

  “I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. Don’t get that grandbaby gleam in your eye just yet,” she teased. “Did I tell you John has decided to open an agency in Nashville?”

  “So, he’s decided to settle here?” Bob asked.

  “We talked about it last weekend after the wedding. He said it would be much easier for him to relocate, keep his office in Pennsylvania, and open another here than for me to uproot and leave my job.”

  “That’s true, granted you wish to remain at your job,” Maeve said.

  “Now, don’t go there again. For now, I have no intentions of changing jobs,” she reminded her adoptive mother gently.

  “Will you live in your apartment?” Bob asked, subtly changing the subject.
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  “I think I’m going to talk to Bryan about one of the new condos Jarrod is building.”

  “I hear those are going to be nice, rather posh,” Maeve added.

  “I need to get details. I’m going to talk to Jill about the possibility of John renting office space in their building.”

  When dinner was over, Lyndsey and Maeve discussed a few more wedding details before Lyndsey said she really must get going.

  “Do you have to leave so early?” Maeve asked.

  “I do, I’m sorry. I want to get to the grocery store so I don’t have to go out tomorrow.”

  “I’m glad you stopped by. We need to go shopping for your gown as soon as you have the time.”

  “I’ll get back to you on that. After this week, things should slow up a little, at least for a few weeks.”

  Bob walked her to the door. “Don’t be a stranger,” he said as she stepped out onto the porch in the early evening sunlight.

  “I won’t. Thanks for dinner,” she said as she gave him a hug and turned to run down the steps and to her car.

  When the groceries had been bought and put away, she was finally ready to relax. She got ready for bed and curled up under the covers. Flipping through the channels, she found a movie that looked interesting and watched it. She thought about what Maeve had said as she watched the movie. What would it be like to follow her dream and write the perfect book or even a screenplay for a movie such as the one she was watching now? That dream had died long ago, but tonight, it had resurfaced.

  Chapter Four

  Her deadline was met, the cranky author had been placated, and John was coming in for a few days to look at Jarrod’s office space. Lyndsey was looking forward to spending some time with him. They had a lot of things to discuss. There was the wedding, the new condo, furniture, and the most important thing, the nature of their relationship.

  She had given it some serious thought. For all her stubbornness and need to be in authority in the workplace, she was conscious of a need she didn’t realize existed, a need to be cared for, protected, and cherished. Perhaps it stemmed from the fact she’d lost her doting parents at an early age. Of course, she’d had a good life with Bob, Maeve and Bryan, but they weren’t her real family, not really. They’d always treated her as their own and shown her love and support, but when she allowed herself, which wasn’t often, she searched her memory for any remnant that remained of her own parents. She pulled out the old photo albums a few times a year. She cried with each turn of the page. She hid it well, but even after all these years, she had never really gotten over losing her precious family at such a young age. She sometimes felt abandoned like the orphan she was. She would never want Maeve to know. It would break her heart and Lyndsey would never wish that. She loved her adoptive family.

  What John was offering her was a loving, yet complicated lifestyle. Was she up to it? Could she truly give him control? A part of her wanted to in the worst way, which had surprised her when she first realized it. She had done some research and she had a list of questions ready for her fiancé when the time was right to ask them.

  She picked him up at the airport on Saturday afternoon. When he saw her, he rushed to her and pulled her into his arms immediately. “I’ve missed you. This wedding can’t get here soon enough for me.”

  She giggled. “Maeve is making progress. It won’t be long now, just a few more months.”

  He leaned down and kissed her thoroughly before they made their way, hand-in-hand, to retrieve his luggage. Once they were in the car, he pulled her close for another kiss.

  “Okay, slow down, lover boy,” she teased. “Let’s go back to my apartment and then you can really show me how much you’ve missed me.”

  “Sounds like a plan to me,” he said as he started the car. He drove expertly through the city until he reached her place. As soon as they were inside, he threw down his bags and took her in his arms.

  His lips touched hers, gently at first, before he thrust his tongue between her parted lips. The kiss deepened in passion until he released her and swept her up into his arms. He carried her swiftly down the hallway to her bedroom where he deposited her onto the bed.

  “You aren’t wasting any time,” she observed as she looked up at him and smiled.

  “Oh no, none at all,” he said as he joined her.

  The kisses began again and as he slowly undressed her, he whispered into her ear, “I want you to know just how much I need to be with you, today and always.”

  “I…need you…too,” she stammered as she rose up to allow him to remove the sleeves of her blouse. He threw the article of clothing on the floor and moved to the button on her jeans. It wasn’t long before they were in a heap on the floor along with her shirt. Clad only in her bra and bikini briefs, she stretched and purred as she watched him remove every stitch of his own attire and throw them in the pile. He reached around to unfasten her bra and it too ended up on the floor. That done, he began to kiss her again, slow and sensuously, and not stopping with her lips. He moved on, to her neck, her breasts, her stomach. Down one leg and up the other, his lips scorched her skin with the heat and passion of a man in love. He was in control of her senses. He suddenly got up and left the room, leaving Lyndsey to wonder what he was up to. When he returned with his bags, he quietly unzipped one of them and removed something.

  “What are you doing?” she asked when he returned to the bed with a shiny pair of silver handcuffs.

  “Trying something new,” he said. “Don’t be afraid, I would never hurt you. We’ll try this and if you don’t like it, tell me.”

  “Okay,” she replied timidly. He placed one of the cold metal cuffs on her right wrist. The other one was fastened to the bedpost and closed. She was his captive. She shifted on the bed and he immediately asked if she was all right.

  “Yes, just getting comfortable,” she replied. She was intrigued and eagerly anticipating his next move.

  He didn’t keep her waiting long. He resumed the exploration of her body with his mouth and this time when he reached her stomach, his lips and tongue traveled down to the waistband of her brief panties. With his teeth, he slowly pulled them down, using his hands to pull them down her legs. Now that she was completely nude, he began to pleasure her by teasing her sensitive, swollen clit with his tongue. She was powerless to do anything but lie back and enjoy the ultimate attention he was giving to her. When the first shudders began to take over her body, she cried out.

  “Yes, go with it, baby, let it go,” he said in encouragement. When the orgasm had subsided, he moved back up to her lips and kissed her again. He picked up the second item he had taken from his bag. It was a long, black scarf.

  “So far so good?” he asked.

  She nodded.

  “Phase two, and again, if this makes you uncomfortable in any way, let me know,” he instructed as he covered her eyes with the soft material of the scarf. He lifted her head and tied it securely behind her head.

  “Can you see anything?” he asked.

  She whispered, “No, but what are you going to do?”

  “Nothing you won’t like, I can assure you,” he answered as he began to kiss her left earlobe. Shivers ran up and down her spine as he gently placed butterfly kisses all over her body. He inserted two fingers into her wet vagina and began to move them inside her, bringing her to a fevered state once more. Just when she was about to explode a second time, he abruptly removed the fingers. She whimpered.

  “Wouldn’t you rather have something else?” he teased.

  Before she knew what was happening, he had rolled off her, turned around, and was on his back. He lifted her up and positioned her so that she was sitting on top of his thick and swollen cock. “You’re sitting on top of me. I want you to slowly take me inside of you,” he commanded.

  Moving her body up and reaching for his dick with her free hand so she could acclimate herself to the situation, she slowly began to do as he’d asked. The sensation of him entering her slowly at her
pace, while not being able to see, was thrilling to her. When he was fully inside of her, she began to move, noting that he was moving with her. The friction was incredible. Knowing that she controlled the movements was exciting. His hands on her buttocks, caressing as they moved together intensified her pleasure and when he inserted a finger into the tight opening of her anus, she began to experience the most intense orgasm she’d ever known. In total abandonment, she rode him until every pleasurable wave had subsided. She collapsed on his chest, his heart beating in her ear, telling her he was as satisfied as she was.

  After a few minutes, he gently untied the scarf. Reaching for the key to the cuffs, he unlocked the one on her wrist and gently rubbed her skin. “Are you okay?” he asked as she rolled over on her back.

  “Oh, yes, I’m perfectly fine,” she replied.

  They lay together for a while, neither one speaking. When he finally got up and went to the shower, she lay in bed thinking about the afternoon. It had begun. Her introduction into his world, mild, but nonetheless, it had been different than all previous sexual encounters.

  “The shower’s all yours. I would have asked you to join me, but I knew if I did, we would never get out of here and I want to take you to dinner.”

  “I won’t be long,” she said as she ran across the hall. When she returned, he had laid a dress on the bed for her.

  “I want you to wear this,” he said.

  “Did you go through my closet?” she asked.

  With raised eyebrows, he replied, “I didn’t think you’d have an objection. I like this dress and it will be perfect for our dinner.”

  “I don’t have a problem with it, I’m just surprised. You’ve never done that before.” She slipped the black dress over her head and wriggled until it fell into place. John was right there to zip it for her.

  “I didn’t know you liked this one,” she said. “You’ve never commented on any of my clothes before.”