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Plundered Hearts

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by J. D. McClatchy




  THIS IS A BORZOI BOOK

  PUBLISHED BY ALFRED A. KNOPF

  Copyright © 2014 by J. D. McClatchy

  All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Random House LLC, New York, and simultaneously in Canada by Random House of Canada Limited, Toronto, Penguin Random House companies.

  www.aaknopf.com/poetry

  Knopf, Borzoi Books, and the colophon are registered trademarks of Random House LLC.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  McClatchy, J. D., 1945–

  [Poems. Selections]

  Plundered Hearts : New and Selected Poems / By J. D. McClatchy.

  —First Edition.

  pages cm

  “Distributed by Random House, Inc., New York.”

  ISBN 978-0-385-35151-5 (Hardcover)—ISBN 978-0-385-35152-2 (eBook)

  I. Title.

  PS3563.A26123A6 2014

  8112.54—dc23 2013023979

  Jacket painting: Sleep by Vincent Desiderio, 2008. Image courtesy of Marlborough Gallery.

  Jacket design by Chip Kidd

  First Edition

  v3.1

  for Chip Kidd

  CONTENTS

  Cover

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  New Poems

  My Hand Collection

  Three Poems by Wilhelm Müller

  Prelude, Delay, and Epitaph

  The Novelist

  One Year Later

  Wolf’s Trees

  Bacon’s Easel

  Palm Beach Sightings

  Kiss Kiss

  My Robotic Prostatectomy

  Two Arias from The Marriage of Figaro

  His Own Life

  Cağaloğlu

  from Scenes from Another Life | 1981

  Aubade

  A Winter Without Snow

  The Tears of the Pilgrims

  from Stars Principal | 1986

  At a Reading

  The Cup

  Anthem

  The Palace Dwarf

  A Cold in Venice

  The Lesson in Prepositions

  Bees

  Hummingbird

  Ovid’s Farewell

  from The Rest of the Way | 1990

  Medea in Tokyo

  The Rented House

  The Shield of Herakles

  Fog Tropes

  Heads

  An Essay on Friendship

  The Window

  Kilim

  from Ten Commandments | 1998

  The Ledger

  My Sideshow

  My Early Hearts

  My Old Idols

  My Mammogram

  Found Parable

  Tea With the Local Saint

  Under Hydra

  Auden’s OED

  What They Left Behind

  Proust in Bed

  Three Dreams About Elizabeth Bishop

  Late Night Ode

  from Hazmat | 2002

  Fado

  Glanum

  Jihad

  Orchid

  Cancer

  Penis

  Tattoos

  The Agave

  The Fever

  The Infection

  Late Afternoon, Rome

  The Bookcase

  Hotel Bar

  A Tour of the Volcano

  Little Elegy

  Ouija

  from Mercury Dressing | 2009

  Mercury Dressing

  Er

  Self-Portrait as Amundsen

  The Frame

  Resignation

  Sorrow in 1944

  Lingering Doubts

  Three Overtures

  Trees, Walking

  Going Back to Bed

  Full Cause of Weeping

  A View of the Sea

  Notes

  Acknowledgments

  A Note About the Author

  Other Books by This Author

  NEW POEMS

  MY HAND COLLECTION

  Arranged around the lamp’s mercury glass globe,

  They reach out for or defend against

  The attention that wood or bronze or resin

  Shakily command at this late stage

  Of reproduction. After all, none is like

  My own one of a kind, its rigging

  Of creases, its scuffed half-moons and bitten nails,

  Its quivering index and moiré

  Pattern of skin loosely draped over the bones—

  Liver spots carelessly spilled on it,

  Along with whatever dings or oily stains

  The insincere handshake and backslap,

  The dog’s tongue or jock’s package have left behind.

  Those on this table are innocent.

  The pair unscrewed from a side chapel’s martyr

  Still holding crazed flakes of their own thumbs,

  The pharaoh’s fist implacably denying

  The idea there are more gods than one,

  A factory glove mold, the madam’s ring holder,

  A mannequin’s milk-white come-hither,

  The miniature ecstatic’s stigmata,

  Someone’s smartly cuffed, celluloid brooch,

  A Buddha’s gilded fingertips joined and poised,

  Like a conductor’s, at last to re-

  lease the final, tremulous, resolving chord—

  Each frozen in a single gesture,

  Pleading, threatening, clinging, shielding, the sorry

  Travelling company called Fierce Desire,

  These here on the left knowing only too well

  What those on the right have been up to.

  Patiently assembled on their glass senate

  Floor, forever in session, the ayes

  Have it over and over again (despite

  Gloria Vanderbilt’s birthday gift,

  A rough-cut back-country tobaccoed pine paw

  That flatly refuses to take sides).

  And of living hands, how many have I held,

  As it were, for keeps—say, wordlessly,

  After the promise that bodies can make, held

  While staring at his sweetly shut eyes.

  What, time and again, was I holding onto,

  As if it had been for dear life’s sake?

  Looking back, I guess I am glad they let go.

  Theirs are not the hands that haunt me now.

  The one that does belonged to a blustery,

  Timid soul at home in dull routines,

  Forfeiting glamour and curiosity,

  A life sustained by its denials.

  I reached for it, only because B-movies

  Demand one pick it up off the sheet,

  A shrivelled, damp, and fetid wedge still clutching

  Nothing but a bed railing of air,

  Its slackened tendons stiff and crusted with scabs

  And knots of scar tissue abutting

  Deep-sunk hematomas, from which the knucklebones

  Jutted like cairns, nails cracked and yellow.

  Though dead for hours, it was not yet cold.

  I didn’t know what to do with it.

  So I held onto it without wanting to,

  Fearful of letting it go too soon.

  It was what—now for the last time—I first held.

  It was a hand. It was my mother’s.

  THREE POEMS BY WILHELM MÜLLER

  1. On the Stream

  How swift you rushed along,

  Your torrent so wild, so bright.

  How quiet you have become.

  No farewell words tonight.

  A hard, unyielding crust

  Hides you where you stand
.

  Cold and motionless you lie

  There, on your bed of sand.

  On your surface I scratch

  With a sharp stone’s edge

  The name of my beloved,

  The day, the hour, the pledge:

  The day when first we met,

  The day I left in spring,

  Name and numbers inside

  The shape of a broken ring.

  And in this brook, my heart,

  Do you see yourself portrayed?

  See beneath its frozen crust

  The turbulent cascade?

  2. The Gray Head

  The frost had left a white

  Covering on my head.

  I thought I had grown old.

  At last! I joyfully said.

  It melted soon enough.

  Again my hair was black.

  I am left here with my youth.

  The grave I seek draws back.

  Between the dusk and dawnlight

  Many heads turned gray.

  Imagine! Mine has not,

  Having come now all this way.

  3. The Hurdy-Gurdy Man

  There, beyond the village,

  Stands a hurdy-gurdy man.

  His fingers numb with cold,

  He plays as best he can.

  Barefoot on the ice,

  To and fro he sways.

  The little plate beside him

  Is empty day after day.

  No one stops to listen,

  Or even notice him.

  The dogs start to snarl

  When the old man begins.

  And he lets it all go by,

  Lets it go as it will.

  He grinds the wooden handle,

  His hand is never still.

  O wondrous old man,

  Will you take me along?

  Will your hurdy-gurdy

  Ever play my song?

  PRELUDE, DELAY, AND EPITAPH

  1.

  A finger is cut from a rubber glove

  And cinched as a tourniquet around my toe.

  The gouging ingrown nail is to be removed.

  The shots supposed to have pricked and burned

  The nerves diabetes has numbed never notice.

  The toe, as I watch, slowly turns a bluish

  Gray, the color of flesh on a slab, the size

  Of a fetus floating on the toilet’s Styx,

  But lumpen, the blunt hull of a tug slowly

  Nosing the huge, clumsy vessel into port.

  2.

  The February

  Moon, its arms around itself,

  Still sits stalled beneath

  Points being made about love

  And death in the sky above.

  The moral is spread

  On some month-old snow out back—

  A design we like

  To think night can make of day,

  The summons again delayed.

  3.

  You who read this too will die.

  None loved his life as much as I,

  Yet trees burst brightly into bloom

  Without me, here in my darkened room.

  THE NOVELIST

  The books sit silently on the shelf,

  Their spines broken but unresentful.

  He sits there too, thinking to himself

  Of nothing—at last an uneventful

  Evening, an hour to sulk or drift,

  No joy to worry, no burden to lift,

  As if on board some two-star ocean

  Liner, able to roam at will

  While confined to its slow motion

  Through the middle of nowhere until

  The dinner bell when the stateroom saves

  Him from what he both avoids and craves.

  Company. Others. The idle crowd

  Beyond his bolted metal door—

  So insatiable, so empty and loud.

  Then, for a moment, the corridor

  Seems like a page in some roman-fleuve

  Where people live the lives they deserve.

  A young man arrives in the glittering city.

  The heroine writes her famous letter.

  Emma stares at the vial with pity.

  Pierre or Pip promises to do better.

  Men and women find in each other

  Why he must kill rather than love her.

  In other words, it resembles the world

  In the books above him, where so much

  Sadness is fingered and then unfurled.

  The wrong address, the inadvertent touch,

  The revolution, the unanswered call,

  The poisoned bouquet, the back-alley brawl.

  He changes his mind. He will accept

  The captain’s invitation to dine.

  His secret, after all, can be kept

  Like those on the shelf: chance and design,

  Until opened, closed but in reach,

  Like words before they become speech.

  ONE YEAR LATER

  In this photograph

  He is knee-deep in water,

  Half-smiling, half-scared.

  His cracked Transformer,

  His knapsack, his cup, his cat.

  Why did they survive?

  How is it we leave so much

  Behind for others to touch?

  •

  Ministers, tell me,

  Why did you think that power

  Would stay where it was?

  Aging cores collapse

  Under waves of a future

  No one can live in.

  The reactors stand there still.

  What is left to warm or kill?

  •

  The news crawl’s moved on

  To other smaller, larger,

  Distant disasters.

  Get on with your life,

  A shy inner voice insists

  On the crowded screen.

  Our lives lengthen into death,

  As if into one last breath.

  •

  He watched for too long.

  He could not run fast enough.

  He was lifted up

  With all the others

  Into reruns of the day

  No one’s come back from.

  When I took that photograph

  He was seven and a half.

  March 11, 2012

  WOLF’S TREES

  If trees fall in a wood and no one hears them,

  Do they exist except as a page of lines

  That words of rapture or grief are written on?

  They are lines too while alive, pointing away

  From the primer of damped air and leafmold

  That underlie, or would if certain of them

  Were not melon or maize, solferino or smoke,

  Colors into which a sunset will collapse

  On a high branch of broken promises.

  Or they nail the late summer’s shingles of noon

  Back onto the horizon’s overlap, reflecting

  An emptiness visible on leaves that come and go.

  How does a life flash before one’s eyes

  At the end? How is there time for so much time?

  You pick up the book and hold it, knowing

  Long since the failed romance, the strained

  Marriage, the messenger, the mistake,

  Knowing it all at once, as if looking through

  A lighted dormer on the dark crest of a barn.

  You know who is inside, and who has always been

  At the other edge of the wood. She is waiting

  For no one in particular. It could be you.

  If you can discover which tree she has become,

  You will know whether it has all been true.

  for Wolf Kahn

  BACON’S EASEL

  On it, the figure of something dead

  Inside a man who’s penetrated

  Another man articulated

  Against a square that could be read

  As a proper balance
or a purple bruise.

  They go about it silently,

  Neither rapt, neither free

  To do as he might elsewhere choose.

  The one, his head wrenched to the side,

  His scrotum like a cortex but hairy,

  His penis eerily catenary,

  Seems to know the other has lied.

  The other has lied, pretending

  To like a no-questions-asked

  Approach to love’s brutal task

  And the overmastered scream it ends in.

  •

  Around it, tiny continents

  Of rust on the lids of oil paint,

  Brushes in coffee tins, the faint

  Smell of urine and arguments.

  Propped up are the photographs

  Of martyrs and their rigmarole,

  The open car and grassy knoll,

  A wartime starlet’s shimmery calf,

  And clippings from some local paper,

  The story of a boy who’d seen

  His father shove a rifle between

  His silent mother’s legs and rape her.

  He sat on a folding stool and stared

  At what he’d done. The edges of flesh

  Where the colors unpredictably thresh—

  There is the soul’s final repair.

  PALM BEACH SIGHTINGS

  The topiaried ficus shrub,

  Snipped into monumentality,

  Can neither slump its shoulders nor shrug

  When its pyramid complains, “Why me?”

  •

  Raucous parakeets

  In the crotch of a palm stump

  Find their tax haven.

  •

  The supermarket’s valet parker,

  Who lives with a storied widow rent-free,

  Sites his orange cone to earmark her

  Slip of shade for the silver Bentley—

  The color her hair would be were it not

  For the bi-stylist who’d asked her to fox-trot.

 

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