Cart Before The Horse

by Bernadette Marie

  “No kidding.”

  “I was. I did fairly well at it. But I needed a change of pace.” He sat back and slipped his arm over Holly’s shoulders. She fought the urge to tense and gave in to the pleasure of it. “My uncle had this place since 1980. It’s doubled in size since then and has a loyal following. The past two years I’ve learned a lot. That’s for sure.”

  “And it’s nice you can live upstairs.”

  “Very convenient at three in the morning when I lock the door.” He blew out a breath and shook his head. Then his eyes lit. “Do you want a tour?”

  “Some other time. I need to get home. My wife will notice I’ve been gone if it exceeds four hours.”

  “Daddy.” Holly shook her head and stood as her father climbed from the booth. “I’ll come by tomorrow.” She kissed him on the cheek.

  “I’ll be waiting.” He pulled her into his arms. “Come for lunch. She’ll want to discuss wedding plans.” He looked her over, and Holly hoped he didn’t see through her act. She didn’t want him to worry about her.

  Ed extended his hand to Gabe. “Hope you can join us too. Trudy looks forward to meeting you.”

  “I’ll see what I can do.”

  Holly watched her father leave the restaurant before she turned to Gabe. “Really, you don’t have to come. I don’t know what to expect from her.”

  “Holly, you have to realize that even if we’re not married, these people will be part of my family. They will be the grandparents of my child. You have to give them a chance to get to know me and vice versa.” He took hold of her arms, drawing her close enough to see the creases of strain around his eyes. “You can’t be completely in control here. This is bigger than you and me both. We’re a team now.”

  She nodded. She wasn’t very good at giving up control. As a waitress carried a plate of fish past her, her stomach rolled at the scent and she realized there was someone else about to take charge of her life.

  Gabe let go of her arms. “Let me know what you want to do. If you want to tell your mother without me there, that’s fine. However, I’m available tomorrow if you need me.”

  He left her with that and went about making his rounds to all the tables to check on their service.

  They’d eaten macaroni and cheese and hot dogs. Gabe had seconds and then thirds. The only unsettling part of the evening was the joy she felt at pleasing him.

  Now she tucked herself into bed. She knew Gabe had hours of work left before he would tuck himself into bed too.

  Holly bit her lip, not wanting to bother him, but she couldn’t help herself. She picked up her cell phone from the nightstand and text messaged him. Good night. I will see you tomorrow. Then she turned off the phone and closed her eyes.

  She woke with a startle when she heard knocking at her door. It was a constant rapping. She looked at the clock. It was three thirty in the morning.

  Holly jumped from bed and pulled the baseball bat she kept from under her bed. Slowly, cautiously, she tiptoed to the front door and looked out the eyehole.

  Gabe.

  Her heart still hammered in her chest as she unlocked the door and flung it open.

  He stood there grinning at her. “Good morning, beautiful. Can I come in?”

  “What are you doing? It’s three thirty in the morning.”

  He looked at her, his lips still parted in an enormous smile. “Are you going to beat me with that thing?” He nodded toward the bat.

  “I’m thinking about it.” She set the bat against the wall, walked to the kitchen, and turned on the light.

  Gabe shut the door and followed her. “I didn’t think you could get any cuter, but you know, right out of bed you’re

  gorgeous.”

  “What do you want?” She took a coffee filter from the cabinet and set it in the basket of the coffeemaker.

  “I have fun planned. Let’s go.”

  She slid him a sideways glance as she filled the coffee pot with water. “You’re deranged.”

  “Your first instinct is to make coffee and I’m deranged? Honey, I’m normal and you’re about to be too.” He took the pot from her hand and set it on the counter. “Go get on some clothes. Something dark. Sweatpants and a sweatshirt if you have them.”

  “Dark clothes.”

  “Go.” He pushed her down the hall, and she could hear him finishing the coffee as she searched for dark clothes.

  Before she emerged, she’d taken a moment to tie back her hair and brush her teeth. It hadn’t taken her but a second to realize that the reason he’d never seen her in such a state was because she’d crawled out of bed and run away the only time they’d made love.

  “Damn you’re cute.” He leaned against the counter with two travel mugs to his side. “Do you take anything in

  your coffee?”

  “No. Are you drunk?” She sniffed but didn’t detect any suspicious odors.

  “No. Well, not on alcohol.” He moved to her and when he touched her she flinched, but he didn’t let go this time. Instead he pressed his mouth to hers, backing her against the

  refrigerator.

  Once again, she found herself being taken under by his kiss and grasping for something to pull her up. But she enjoyed

  it too much.

  Finally, she managed her hands to his chest and gave a weak shove, but it did the trick. He broke off the kiss.

  She concentrated on breathing. “You have to stop

  doing that.”

  “I don’t think I can. You’ve gotten under my skin, Holly.”

  “And you’ve gotten under mine.” She rested her hands on her stomach.

  The smile he’d worn since he’d walked through her door disappeared, and his eyes softened. He took his hand and rested it on her stomach.

  Holly choked back the tears that tugged at her. Her stomach, which was growing taut, was sensitive to his touch even through the sweatshirt she wore.

  “Don’t think I’m some goofy sap, okay?” He reached for her hand and laid it on her stomach with his. “I’ve never loved anything so much in my whole life. It seems strange to me too, be-

  cause I can’t see it. But I love this baby more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”

  “More than Jasmine?” Her voice was soft, and his eyes were sad when they met hers.

  “Yes.”

  “I’m sorry. That wasn’t nice.”

  Gabe raised his hand to her cheek and rested it there. “It’s okay. I’ll always love Jasmine. But, Holly, there’s a lot of room in my heart.”

  “Gabe.” She reached for his hand to remove it, but he kept it there. Warmth resonated through her entire body, and it—he—comforted her in a way no other person had been able to in her life. There was more there than friendship. Perhaps not love, but it went deep, and she knew by his touch.

  “I know you don’t want anything between us. I can’t blame you. I feel like I’ve done you wrong. But I can’t help but think this was fate for both of us.”

  “How do you figure that?” He was so close she could feel the heat from his body, a sharp contrast from the cold of the refrigerator at her back.

  “I needed to love again. I needed to move on. And you needed something that would take away your control. Nothing does that like a baby.” He smiled then stepped away. “Besides, think of it this way. Our night together was for fun. We intended it that way and we utilized it that way, but we were careful. We used protection and we didn’t plan this. This is bigger than both of us.”

  Gabe picked one of the mugs and handed it to her. He took the other for himself before turning off the coffeepot.

  Holly watched him. He was wise and she hated to admit it. “Gabe, I don’t feel like you’ve done me wrong. Things were always backward for me, I just thought this part of my life wouldn’t have been. My plan for motherhood included years of marriage preceding it. I’m not good with spontaneous.”

  The grin was back and there was an evil twinkle in his

  eyes. “That’s why I’m here.
C’mon. I have a spontaneous and

  very normal adventure for us.”

  A knot in her stomach formed, and she swallowed back fear that would normally hold her back. “What are we doing?”

  “I’ll tell you as soon as we get in the car. But we have to hurry. It’s four o’clock now. It might risk our mission if we wait any longer.”

  She was too stunned and sleepy to ask too many questions as they drove through town. The night was growing colder, and the coffee warmed her nicely.

  Gabe pulled onto the highway and headed toward the south end of Denver.

  “Are you going to tell me where you’re going?” She took another sip of her warm coffee and tried to keep from growing tired with the motion of the car.

  “Look in the backseat.”

  She turned and looked. “Gabe, you have toilet paper in the back seat.”

  He laughed. “Yep.”

  “Dear, God. What are we going to do?”

  “Cause a little trouble.” His face lit up.

  She didn’t want to smile at him, but she couldn’t help it. She wasn’t sure it was a very good idea, but just like the macaroni and cheese, it pleased her to watch him enjoy himself.

  Gabe weaved through the streets and then parked on a quiet, dimly lit residential block.

  “Whose house is this?”

  “Chandra’s. She deserves a little of what’s coming to her.” He reached for the package of toilet paper and tore it open. He took two rolls and shoved them into the deep pocket on the front of his sweatshirt. Then he handed her two rolls and she did the same. “Okay, here are the rules. There aren’t any.” His teeth flashed white in the dark. “But if someone comes, run back to the car. Okay?”

  Holly nodded, and Gabe climbed from the car. He came

  around to the passenger side and gave her a hand out. “Stick with me. Your first time can be scary.”

  First time?

  Gabe pulled her by the hand down the block and to a house enveloped in darkness.

  He motioned to her to head to a bank of bushes, where he began unrolling his toilet paper roll and launched it into a tree. It fell to the earth, leaving a trail of paper on the limbs. He gave her a nod to do the same to the bushes.

  Her heart raced so fast she wasn’t sure it would stay confined in her chest. She’d never done something like this. Wasn’t it illegal? But he was right about her—she needed to learn to be normal. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and counted to three. With shaking hands, she held the toilet paper and pulled off strips. She tossed them onto the bush and let go an inaudible laugh.

  In Holly style, the bushes were draped with simple but elegant garlands of toilet paper by the time she was done. When she turned to see what Gabe had done, the entire front of the yard looked like it had snowed. He was certainly experienced.

  He held out his hands for her to throw her another roll, which she did. He went about wrapping up the mailbox.

  It was then a set of headlights lit up the street. Holly’s heart rate ramped up even faster. Gabe dashed across the lawn and grabbed her hand. He pulled her to the side of the house and pushed her down into a crouch behind the bush. The car drove by and Gabe gave her a pat on the head.

  They finished the roll and ran back to the car.

  When they were securely inside and driving away, hysterical laughter took over and she laughed until tears rolled down her cheeks.

  Gabe looked at her. “You had fun.”

  There was a lightness inside of her where the ball of fear had once weighed her down. “Yes, I had fun.”

  “We would have soaped the windows too, but I didn’t know if you would.”

  “Perhaps we’ll save that for another day,” she said on another roll of laughter.

  The sky had become lighter when they pulled up to

  Holly’s building.

  She raised her travel mug of cold coffee in a toast. “Would you like to come up for a warm-up?”

  “Yes.” He reached for her hand and ran his thumb gently over her knuckles. Then he looked up at her, his eyes warm and compassionate. “But I’m going to head home instead. Thanks for letting me kidnap you. I haven’t done that in years.”

  She couldn’t help but smile at him. “Thank you for taking me. I’ll never forget it.” She leaned over the console and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

  Holly grabbed the two coffee mugs as Gabe got out of the car. A moment later, he opened her door and helped her out.

  “Thank you.” She stepped to the side and Gabe closed the door. His arm brushed her, and his body, so close, yet he pulled back to give her distance. “I’m heading up to Boulder around one. Would you like to go with me?”

  “Are you sure?”

  She let out a sigh. “Yes, I’m sure.”

  “Would you like me to pick you up?”

  “No, I’ll pick you up. When you drive we seem to do

  bad things.”

  “But enjoyable.” He flashed that sexy grin. “I’ll see

  you later.”

  Holly turned as she opened the door to the building and saw Gabe still standing next to his car. He gave her a thougtful smile before she walked inside then took the elevator up to her condo. Aside from the night she’d snuck out of bed and left Gabe sleeping, she didn’t remember another time she’d gotten home in the wee hours of the morning.

  She was exhausted, but she wondered if she would be able to sleep.

  Holly unlocked the door to her condo and went to the window and looked down. He was still there looking up. She turned on a light and waved down. He gave her a wave and a nod, then climbed back in his car and she watched him drive away.

  She knew at that moment she was going to let things slip beyond the limits she’d set. Gabe Maguire seemed to do that to her. Was it so bad? Could she let herself go and enjoy him, even love him a little?

  She walked to the kitchen and set the mugs in the sink, her shoulders bowing.

  He loved Jasmine, and she’d never be able to replace his feelings for his late wife. They were friends having a baby together, that was all. It would only hurt if she let herself think differently.

  Chapter Six

  Gabe sat at the bar nursing a cup of coffee. Taking Holly out to TP Chandra’s house had been more fun than he’d anticipated, but it had severely cut into his sleep and he was feeling it. When you were seventeen and you stayed out all night you could sleep it off. But at thirty-nine you didn’t bounce back so quickly.

  The restaurant had a few lunch patrons, but the Saturday crowd was always smaller than the weekday ones. He could usually get by without being seen until six in the evening. Though he’d love to be upstairs in his bed, he’d promised Holly he’d go with her to her parents’ house.

  When the front door opened and Chandra walked through, she chucked a roll of toilet paper at his head. “You forgot one.”

  The smile that took over his face hurt his cheeks. “Good afternoon. How are you today?”

  “Frickin’ mess you left.”

  He laughed. “Oh, it was so worth it.”

  “You weren’t very quiet either,” she said as she shrugged her coat off and hung it on the rack by the door.

  “Didn’t have to be.”

  Chandra shook her head and walked behind the bar. She poured herself a cup of coffee and leaned across the counter. “Did you turn her into a deviant like you?”

  “Not yet, but I will.” The thought of shaking up Holly’s world was a good one.

  “Knocking her up wasn’t enough, huh?”

  His smile disappeared and his cheeks relaxed. “Why do women see it like that? I see this great opportunity to bring a child into the world, and she’s mortified.”

  “Touchy subject, huh? Well, of course that’s how we see it. You just altered her path in life. She’s a career gal, right?” He nodded. “Now she has to think about new career clothes, sick time, birth time, nannies, being up all night, breast-feeding…”

  “Got it. Got it.�
� He drank down his cold coffee and pushed the mug toward Chandra, who refilled it. “You know, she was in that bed too.”

  “I know. And when you walked out of here that night with her attached to your face, I knew I’d be seeing her around for a long time.”

  His smile returned. “I really like her.”

  “It shows.” She sipped her coffee. “Even if she doesn’t admit it, she really likes you too.”

  “Her father gave me a ring to give her.”

  “The ruby? I saw it.”

  “You don’t miss much.”

  “It’s my job to pay attention.”

  “She’s wearing it, but she doesn’t want to get married.”

  Chandra shrugged. “Give it time. What else do you have? You’re raising the kid together, right?”

  “Of course.”

  “So what if the kid is ten by the time she figures out you’re the prime catch? Neither of you is going anywhere.”

  She was right. No wonder she was his most popular bartender. He saw Holly’s car pull up out front.

  He pushed his mug toward Chandra and she put it in the sink. He grabbed his coat off the back of the bar stool and slid his arms through. “Your son have to clean up that mess?”

  “That was the deal.”

  As Holly walked through the door, he took a twenty out of his pocket and handed it to Chandra. “Tell him thanks.”

  “This is a little steep for an eight-year-old, don’t you think?”

  “A deal was a deal and it was worth every cent.” He turned to Holly. “Hi, beautiful.”

  “Hello.” She looked at him and then at Chandra. Her head dropped and her cheeks turned red. “Hello, Chandra.”

  Gabe bit down on his lip to stop the smirk that threatened to surface.

  “What’s new?” Chandra gave her a nod.

  “End of the world is about to happen.” Her face faded to white, and he wondered if she was that nervous or if she was sick again.