Wingless

by Taylor Lavati

  "No. It's about your sister," I say, hoping that will make him let me speak.

  "What?" he asks me back, his voice trembling.

  "She didn't make it."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Lucifer killed her down there. She did it to protect you. Luke wanted to find you because you helped us. She sacrificed herself," I tell him, not wanting him to see his sister in a bad light.

  "She wouldn't do that," Hare says. "She's too selfish to protect anyone but herself. Even me."

  "She tried to save you in her own way. I swear it," Gabe says from his spot above Annie. I nod when Hare looks up at me for confirmation.

  "I think I need to go lie down," Hare mumbles, backing up and stumbling over himself. He retreats to Annie's bedroom and locks himself in. It's silent.

  "How is she?" I ask Gabe as I walk towards him. She's clearly in meditation, sound asleep. I can hear her small intakes of breath.

  "I can't tell, to be perfectly honest. She's been out since I started flying," Gabe says.

  "Why don't you meditate? I'll watch her," I tell him, wanting to have alone time with her.

  "I think you need it more than me," he says, looking me up and down. I don't need him to tell me what I look like. I can feel it. I can feel my aching body. But all I want is for Annie to wake up, so I'm not resting until she does.

  "Please?" I ask him.

  "Okay. I'm not too hurt, so I'll only be a little while. Then you can rest," Gabe says. He walks over to me and wraps me in a one-armed hug. "It's going to be okay," he says and then flies to the guest bedroom.

  Finally alone, I look down at precious Annie and will her to feel better. My lids are heavy with exhaustion. I don't want to leave Annie's side, though. I can't. I have to make sure she's okay.

  I grab some pillows from the other couch and lay them on the floor in front of Annie. She's deep in meditation and doesn't stir as I move around. I reach up towards her as I lie down on the pillows. I take her hand in mine and fall into meditation holding her, so I'll know the second that she wakes up.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Whole New World

  I faintly recall hearing my name. But, I'm too comfortable to move. It feels like home, which I never knew had a feeling. Warmth wraps me in its arms and holds me there, bundled up.

  "Micha, seriously, come out."

  It's Gabe. His voice is dark and husky, angry almost. The severity in it makes me open my lids and both him and Hare are glaring down at me.

  "What?" I ask, disoriented from my meditation. I stretch and am about to stand when I realize there's a person laying on me. My heart jumps from my chest when I see Annie's beautiful face nuzzled between my armpit and my bicep.

  At first, I want to wrap her around me and never let go, but the leering faces bring me back to reality. I start to maneuver my way out from under her.

  "Yeah, you might want to be a bit faster," Hare says, his eyes darting over his shoulder.

  "What's going on?" I ask them.

  "The Archers are coming. Now," Gabe says.

  "Here?"

  "Yes."

  "Great," I mutter, shaking my head. "Let me change. I'll be right back."

  I move past Gabe and Hare, past Annie who's still passed out on the floor, and into her bedroom. I shut the door behind me to give myself some privacy.

  The bathroom is connected through a narrow door, and I step through, feeling smaller than I've ever felt. When I look in the large mirror above her sink, I'm amazed at myself.

  I've never looked tired before. I've never looked hurt and worn down. But today, I do. My eyes have bags underneath them, tinted a greenish purple.

  I unfurl my wings to see how much damage they endured when I remember that I don't have any. I pull the shirt over my head and turn around so I can examine my bare back.

  It looks weird. Wrong. I run my hand over my shoulder and try to figure out how they could just be gone, but I feel nothing. I'm human and it hurts.

  I try to fly, levitate just a little bit off the ground, but it's clear that all of my powers are gone. As I go back into the bedroom, I raise my hand and keep walking for the door, but I walk straight into it. I've never had to manually open a door before. I'm pathetic now.

  In the closet, I'm able to find a few pieces of clothing that fit me. In the corner is a set of clothes, and I'm just praying they weren't left here from Lucifer. It would kill me.

  Just as I have the pants on and the shirt over my head, the door to the room opens and shuts. Annie steps towards me, her eyes and mouth drawn down.

  "What's wrong?" I ask her.

  "I'm sorry, Micha," she says. Her eyes come up and find me and hold me to them. She steps forward and wraps her arms around my shoulders, squeezing me so we're as close as humanly possible. I pull her back so I can see into her eyes. I want her to see what I'm saying.

  "You have nothing to be sorry for. I understand your hatred towards us."

  "I don't hate you," she says, shaking her head and stepping completely away from me.

  "You said you resented us. You said you hated us for taking you out of the Veil and leaving you here."

  "I hate the Angels for leaving me. I never once hated you. I just thought I did. I thought I had to hate you because you were one of them. I didn't trust you. I should've known you were watching me," she says. A trickle of tears flows from her eyes and it takes every muscle in my body to stop myself from reaching forward and wiping them away.

  "I went against every rule to come down here and save you," I say, my voice just barely a whisper.

  "I know," she answers, nodding her head. "Can you forgive me?"

  "Of course. Come here." I wave my hand over, and she runs towards me. I hold her tightly, my mind playing out scenarios of Annie and I together. That is until the reality of my life dawns on me. I'm mated.

  "I don't mean to break this up, but they're here," Gabe says, peeking his head in the door. I drop Annie onto the floor, like we've been caught and my face heats with embarrassment. I don't even know why. It's just Gabe. Annie giggles, and then we step into the living room together.

  "What do you think is going to happen?" I ask Gabe as I stop and stand beside him, facing the door so that when the Archers come in, they see us. I position Annie a little to my right but behind me, so I can protect her. I know things are going to be said and I need to know she's okay.

  "I'm pretty sure we're in trouble," Gabe says, laughing to himself. As if this is a funny matter. I roll my eyes and face forward, looking over at Hare, who has joined us. He grabs Annie's hand and stands beside her. I'm almost jealous.

  But before I can dwell on their interlocked hands, the Archers fly in the room. Uriel rushes in first and heads straight to Gabe. They hug each other and then talk quietly, just to each other. The triplets are in next. Raphael is first, and he doesn't say hello to any of us. He just stops a few feet in front of us and waits. Raguel and Remiel are next, and they stand beside their brother, stern faced and emotionless.

  Lastly is Sara, the person I've been most nervous to see. Her eyes flutter from Gabe to me and when she sees me, she actually smiles. I've barely ever gotten a smile out of her. She flies to me and jumps into my arms. The display of affection is abnormal.

  I put her on the ground after she pecks my cheek, and then she glances at Annie. I can't really tell what transpires between the two, but it's catty, and I don't like it. I lean a little of my right, covering Annie with my body, shielding her from Sara.

  Sara glances at me and then steps into line beside Uriel. The six of them stand in front of the four of us and it's a stand off to see who will speak first. I decide that since we broke the rules, I will talk first and try to break the ice.

  "So, we got Annie from Luke in the Lower Veil. We made it out okay. But, there is a darker matter on our hands," I say, my throat becoming dry. "Luke is creating an army, like we told you before. But we got a glimpse of it down there. And I'm afraid the scales may be a bit tipped." />
  "Why do you say that?" Remi asks, his voice not giving anything away.

  "I gave away my wings and powers," I tell them.

  "To who?" Sara shrieks.

  "Lucifer."

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  Balancing Act

  Between their screams and Gabe trying to mediate the situation, my mind shuts down. I block out everything they're saying: I'm stupid, selfish, going against Rem. I hear it all, but I don't let it get to me. I knew that this would happen when I made the deal. But I had to protect Annie. And I wouldn't change what I did at all.

  "You did it all for what? That weak human? She's not even that pretty." Sara points right in Annie's face.

  "Enough!" I shout. Talking about me is one thing, but bringing Annie into this is just wrong. She didn't do a single thing. Sara has gone too far. "You can talk poorly about me, but don't speak about her like that." Sara's eyes widen at my defensive attitude, but I don't care.

  I look over to see that Annie is crying onto Hare. His gray tee-shirt has a dark stain over his chest as her tears soak him. I look back at the Archers.

  "What's done is done. If you Angels want to ignore the impending war, then that's your problem. I'm stuck here, and while it's unfortunate, it's permanent for one year. Go back to the Veil." All of their eyes are on me. I try to puff up my chest and appear stronger than I feel.

  "We'll have to go speak with the Serafers. I don't know protocol for losing an Archer without actually dying. As of now, I think we can all choose to motion Michael out of the Archers," Uriel says, looking to his left and right at the others. "Agreed?"

  "Agree," all but Gabriel and Saraquel say back. But they expected that to be the outcome. All they need is majority and they definitely got it.

  "What about our mating?" Sara asks, her voice soft and feminine. Her face looks broken, her heart shattered. I know that it's all because of me. Even though she acts tough, and for the most part is, I know that deep inside there's a part of her that cares.

  "You don't want to mate with a human anyway," Remi says with acid in his tone. The anger cuts me, but I don't show it.

  "We can talk to the Serafers and figure this all out," Uriel says, forever the voice of reason.

  "So, let's go already. I hate being on Earth," Raphael says, turning up his nose. Uriel nods at me, the most I'm going to get I guess, and then leaves the way he came. The triplets are next, and they don't even say a single thing.

  Sara looks like she might come over. Her eyes are locked onto mine like missiles. I raise my eyebrows, as if asking her what she wants. But she doesn't move. She shakes her head side to side with a sad expression on her face. And then she turns around and leaves.

  While I never loved her, it still hurts to know that I don't have her anymore. I'm sure the Serafers will agree with Remi and give her a new mate. Hopefully it'll be the guy she needs and loves. Hopefully he'll treat her right and love her like she deserves.

  "I love you, brother," Gabe says before pulling me into a tight hug. "I'll work on it, but I can't promise anything. I'll try to come see you soon," he whispers in my ear. He pulls back, and I nod my head, urging him to go.

  "Take care of everyone. I'll miss you," I tell him. Before a second passes, he's gone.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  Human Life

  Emotionally drained, I go into Annie's bedroom and shut the door. I dive into her bed and lie on top of it, trying to sort through everything. I'm stuck here; the constricting feeling weighs heavily on my chest. I struggle trying to get air into my lungs. I shut my eyes to block the spinning room.

  "Micha, relax," Annie says, placing her hand over my heart. I can feel her indent on the bed beside me. Her closeness only makes my heart pick up. "You're going to kill yourself if you don't stop," she says, rubbing my chest now.

  "I'm stuck here," I mutter.

  "Yup."

  "I'm powerless."

  "Yup."

  "I can't even fly."

  "Yup."

  "What am I going to do?" I question. I don't even know how to live like this. While I've been on Earth plenty of times, I've never actually had to live here. I've never been stuck here. I've never been unable to use powers and fly. I'm broken. A broken Angel.

  "I don't know. But you've got me and Hare. We'll help you," she says. I open my eyes and meet her green eyes with mine. She's smiling, happy, and I'm not sure why. "You okay?" she asks, worried.

  "I will be," I answer, faking a smile for her. She leans forward and hugs me, her brown hair tumbling over me. Smoke from the Lower Veil still clings to her, but she also smells fresh and fruity.

  "Why did you do it?" she asks me.

  "Do what?" I ask back.

  "Give it all up."

  "For you," I answer, meeting her gaze with seriousness.

  "But why?"

  "I couldn't imagine living in a universe that doesn't have you in it." This time I lean forward and grab her. I pull her into my arms and try to memorize the way she feels against me. I try to memorize her smell and body and everything about this simple girl.

  "I have such a good idea for us today!" She pulls back and stares down at me. "I know you're all sad, and I feel awful with my bruised body and all, but I've been wanting to do this for a while, and there's no one I'd rather do it with. I think it'll make us both feel better."

  "Okay…" I say hesitantly.

  "Be ready in five," she says and then jumps up from the bed. She runs through the house, and I hear her talking to Hare, but can't make out what she's saying. I drop my head into my hands, sigh, and then get up. Annie is trying to convince Hare of something when I find them in the kitchen.

  "Are you crazy?" he asks her. "I'm not doing that! You have officially gone mad."

  "Tons of people do it. It means something to me. Please!" she whines.

  "What exactly are we doing?" I ask, leaning up against the counter.

  "Secret!" Annie says, glaring at Hare to shut up. She puts her finger to her lips and shushes him. He just smiles at her, shaking his head. "Let's go. All of us."

  Annie moves towards the door and starts down the stairs, knowing that we'll follow her. But before we step into the stairwell, I grab Hare's forearm. He looks at me with questioning eyes.

  "I just want to you know I'm really sorry about your sister," I tell him.

  "I know. It's okay," he answers.

  "And I'm sorry I left you here."

  "Now you'll have to work for that apology," he laughs. I must look worried because he pulls me into a one armed hug. "Just kidding. You can buy dinner, though." He laughs again and then starts running down the stairs towards Annie.

  "What's taking you so long, Micha?" she yells up.

  "Coming," I answer.

  "Can someone tell me again why she's doing this?" I ask as I watch Annie shirtless lie on a black, padded table. She's face down, so there's nothing revealed, but still.

  "Once I do this, I can move on. I'm human, but I still dwell on all this Angel drama. When I accept what could have been, I can move on from it and have my own life."

  "Well, when you say it like that," I mutter. "Maybe I'll get some, too."

  "Really?" She looks up from the table and smiles at me. I realize that I'd do anything to get that smile again. So, I tell the guy that I want something similar to her, but a bit manlier. He chuckles, despite the fact that I'm dead serious.

  "I might as well get something then," Hare says. He steps towards the bookcase and grabs a picture book. He flips through the pages until he sees something he likes. He points to it and talks in hushed whispers to the girl behind the counter.

  I head into one room, leaving Annie with the guy who's doing hers. I get a dark haired man, with a nose ring and spiked up hair. I explain exactly what I want and he nods along while drawing on a sketchpad. I hear Hare doing the same in the room next to me with the woman who's doing his.

  When the guy shows me the picture, I'm stunned. They're perfectly mine, and I nod a hundre
d times, praying it comes out exactly as he's outlined. Annie was right. This is therapeutic. Once I do this, I can move forward, forget everything that's happened in the past and live in the now.

  The first prick is shocking. I try not to move, because I don't want the guy to screw up, but the needle digs into my skin and then out, over and over. After the initial alarm, it actually starts to feel good. Well, not good, more like numb.

  The buzzing is constant; the vibrations up and down my back soothing in a twisted way. As he moves around behind me, I try to feel the outline and what he's doing, but it's hard to keep track. Time goes way too fast and before I know it, the guy is holding up a mirror so I can see the tattoo on my back.

  It's amazing what this man has done for me. The wings on my back look real, despite the fact that they were drawn on. They take up most of my back, extending to my shoulders and ending just above my pant line. With each stroke, you can see the intricate detailing to each feather.

  "How long was that?" I ask the guy. I finally take a look at him, and he's covered in sweat. His face is glistening and red. He put everything he had onto my back and no sum of money can compensate him.

  "About six hours," he answers.

  "Are you kidding me?" I ask back, wondering where the time went.

  "You were a great canvas. Never budged. I figured you'd want it finished today. Seemed like you needed it," he says, shrugging his shoulders.

  "Thank you. Thank you so much," I tell him, glancing back at the mirror.

  "Your friends are outside," the guy says.

  "I never got your name," I tell him.

  "Sam," he says, and I nod. I reach into my pocket and find a wad of cash. I don't know whose it is. But this man deserves it all. I hand it over to him, but as he counts, he starts to shake his head. "I can't take all of this. It's like a thousand dollars."

  "You deserve it. Please, keep it. You've saved me," I tell him.

  "Are you sure?" he asks back, looking between the money and me.

  "Positive," I answer. I walk out of the room after he wraps me in plastic. I'm not supposed to take it off for at least two hours. When I step into the waiting room, Hare and Annie are there, waiting anxiously from their expressions.