Clarissa Harlowe; or the history of a young lady — Volume 1

by Samuel Richardson

  LETTER XIV

  MISS CLARISSA HARLOWE, TO MISS HOWE THURSDAY EVENING, MARCH 2.

  On Hannah's depositing my long letter, (begun yesterday, but by reasonof several interruptions not finished till within this hour,) she foundand brought me yours of this day. I thank you, my dear, for this kindexpedition. These few lines will perhaps be time enough deposited, to betaken away by your servant with the other letter: yet they are only tothank you, and to tell you my increasing apprehensions.

  I must take or seek the occasion to apply to my mother for hermediation; for I am in danger of having a day fixed, and antipathy takenfor bashfulness.--Should not sisters be sisters to each other? Shouldnot they make a common cause of it, as I may say, a cause of sex, onsuch occasions as the present? Yet mine, in support of my brother'sselfishness, and, no doubt, in concert with him, has been urging in fullassembly it seems, (and that with an earnestness peculiar to herselfwhen she sets upon any thing,) that an absolute day be given me; and ifI comply not, to be told, that it shall be to the forfeiture of all myfortunes, and of all their love.

  She need not be so officious: my brother's interest, without hers, isstrong enough; for he has found means to confederate all the familyagainst me. Upon some fresh provocation, or new intelligence concerningMr. Lovelace, (I know not what it is,) they have bound themselves, orare to bind themselves, by a signed paper, to one another [The Lordbless me, my dear, what shall I do!] to carry their point in favour ofMr. Solmes, in support of my father's authority, as it is called, andagainst Mr. Lovelace, as a libertine, and an enemy to the family: and ifso, I am sure, I may say against me.--How impolitic in them all, to jointwo people in one interest, whom they wish for ever to keep asunder!

  What the discharged steward reported of him is surely bad enough: whatMrs. Fortescue said, not only confirms that bad, but gives room to thinkhim still worse. And yet the something further which my friends havecome at, is of so heinous a nature (as Betty Barnes tells Hannah) thatit proves him almost to be the worst of men.--But, hang the man, Ihad almost said--What is he to me? What would he be--were not this Mr.Sol----O my dear, how I hate the man in the light he is proposed to me!

  All of them, at the same time, are afraid of Mr. Lovelace; yet notafraid to provoke him!--How am I entangled!--to be obliged to go oncorresponding with him for their sakes--Heaven forbid, that theirpersisted-in violence should so drive me, as to make it necessary for myown!

  But surely they will yield--Indeed I cannot.

  I believe the gentlest spirits when provoked (causelessly and cruellyprovoked) are the most determined. The reason may be, that not takingup resolutions lightly--their very deliberation makes them the moreimmovable.--And then when a point is clear and self-evident, how canone with patience think of entering into an argument or contention uponit?--

  An interruption obliges me to conclude myself, in some hurry, as well asfright, what I must ever be,

  Yours more than my own, CLARISSA HARLOWE.