Finding Charley (Full Circle)

by Casey Peeler

  “Thanks, Dad. I wish I could open my own store or do something, but I just don’t know how it’d go over.”

  “Well, I believe you would do great.”

  “Hey, Mama, whatcha think of those pajamas?” Tessa asks.

  “They’re perfect! I can always use a new pair of those. The little martini glasses are too cute.”

  “We thought that looked like you,” I say with a smile.

  We enjoy everyone’s company, clean up the massive amount of wrapping paper from the floor, take our gifts to our rooms, and get ready for a day of celebrating Jesus’ birth with friends and family with no threat of Dylan to interfere.

  Getting ready, I decide to look a little festive. I pull on a red long-sleeved shirt, jeans, and boots. I accent my wardrobe with a pair of Christmas tree earrings that Mama gave me when I was eight. I wore them all the time until I realized it wasn’t cool to wear them anymore, especially in mid- July.

  I go to see if Tessa’s ready and to inquire if Cash has called or texted her this morning. I knock and walk in.

  “Are you not ready yet?” I ask.

  “What does it look like?” she answers as she stands there half-dressed with her hair still wet from her shower. “You’re as slow as a snail. It’s not like Dustin’s around or anything.”

  “Well, you look like you’re trying to impress someone yourself, Charley, and those earring set it off,” she says with a smart ass attitude and her hand on her hip.

  “Don’t be jealous. You know you have a pair, too.”

  “I do, don’t I? Maybe I should wear them, too. It would make Mama’s day.” She finishes getting ready, and I borrow her phone.

  Tessa: Hey $ it’s me. Merry Christmas.

  Cash: Merry Christmas Char-coal! I love you!

  Tessa: I love you 2.

  Knowing that he is about to respond to my text, I call him to hear his voice instead.

  “Merry Christmas, Cash Money! Was Santa good to ya?’”

  “I’m talkin’ to you, so yes, he’s been good to me. How about you? Did you get everything you wanted?”

  “Almost. I want you here now, and I know that can’t happen. But, I think this will make your Christmas. Dylan’s gone to see his gramps until Wednesday. Do you know what that means?”

  “Damn right, I do! That means you and me!”

  “Yup! What are y’all’s plans for the day? We just finished presents, breakfast, and now are just hanging out until supper.”

  “That’s about like us. We do have to go by Aunt Joan’s for lunch, but that’s it.”

  “So, does this mean that you’ll stay with me tonight?”

  “Char-coal, I didn’t want to leave last night, but I was afraid that someone would catch us. Yes, I’ll stay with you tonight.”

  “I can’t wait. I guess just text Tessa or call me later. This just might be the best Christmas ever.”

  “No, Char-coal, this isn’t the best, but it is the first of many to come. I plan on making each one better than the last. I love you, and I plan on proving that to you each and every day of my life.”

  “Cash, I love you so much, and I hope to do the same. Enjoy your day with your family, and I can’t wait to see you tonight.”

  After hanging up, I text all the Kluft girls to wish them a Merry Christmas and ask them about coming to Grassy Pond for New Year’s Eve. Within seconds, there are all kinds of Merry Christmas wishes, pictures, and hell yes’s for New Year’s. Of course, Hayden’s text is priceless.

  Hayden: Hell yeah! That means I can get one of those cowboys to kiss me at midnight! I’m in!

  Me: Country boy, Hayden, not cowboy. Get it right ;)

  Tessa and I laugh as we read the comments. The stress-free day has lightened both of our moods, and we can enjoy Christmas for what it’s meant to be. Once Tessa is finally ready, we go downstairs to hang out with the family.

  Grandma and Mama are sitting around the table with cups of coffee. Tessa and I fill our own cups and sit with them.

  “Girls, I’m so proud of who you have become. I’m glad to say that y’all are my granddaughters."

  Thanks, Grandma, but we haven’t really done anything,” I say.

  “Yes, you have. I’ve watched you two grow into fine young ladies. You make me and the rest of your family proud. Keep it up.”

  “We’ll try,” Tessa says, and I feel an ache in my heart. If my grandma only knew the real me and what I was doing right now, she’d be embarrassed, heartbroken, and ready to beat Dylan’s ass.

  We spend the remainder of the day helping Mama and Grandma prepare for the big meal and watching holiday movies. Oh, wait! We watch A Christmas Story over and over.

  “Tess, please turn the dang channel. I’m sick and tired of watchin’ this movie. I need something other than a leg lamp and a BB gun!”

  “One more time, Char. Please?” I look around the room. Our parents and grandparents have now joined us. I glance in their direction to see if their thoughts meet mine, and they do. It is so obvious.

  “Um, no. Change it. Anything but this again. I think everyone in this room agrees.”

  “Fine.” She huffs and then reluctantly gives in. We decide on the Hallmark Channel, and before we are twenty minutes into the movie, all the men in the room are asleep. Thank goodness they aren’t sawing logs.

  After the movie, we all excuse ourselves to the kitchen. Tessa and I complete the final touches on the desserts while Mama and Grandma finish the ham and sides.

  “Girls, what are you going to do since the guys in your life are gone?”

  I look at Tessa, and we both shrug.

  “I guess I’ll be at the pool most of the time, but the Kluft girls are coming to celebrate New Year’s in the big city of Grassy Pond.”

  Mama stops mid-stir on the macaroni and cheese. “Were you planning on telling me this when they got here?”

  “No, well, we just kinda finalized it this morning. We wanted to get together, and Hayden and Anna are dying to find them a cowboy.”

  Grandma chimes in, “Cowboy? Are they confused? There are no cowboys in Grassy Pond.”

  “I know. Cash even told Hayden that, but they are Yankees and don’t know the difference between country and cowboy. That’s why they wanna come.”

  “I think that’s a great idea. I’d just like a little notice. Y’all going to the McCracken’s farm?” Mama asks.

  “Yup.”

  “You do know that you’re gonna have to help me get this house back together for them to come. There is no way I want new guests to see it like this.”

  “Mama, you had a party here last night, and now it’s a holiday. We’ll help ya, but they aren’t gonna care.”

  “That might be the case, but I do.”

  Once the food is ready, we all gather around the dining room table. You would think that the way Mama is with Thanksgiving that she would be the same way with Christmas, but she’s not. Instead, she just wants us to relax, eat until we are stuffed, and enjoy each other’s company.

  When we finish eating, Tessa and I take care of the dishes and let the adults relax. Dad and Grandpa watch the football game. Mama and Grandma watch it with them, even though I think they could care less.

  “Hey, Tessa, you got my back tonight?”

  “You know it, but something just doesn’t feel right to me.”

  “Watcha mean?”

  “I just feel like this has been too easy. He is liable to surface at some point, like last night. That was crazy. Something is way off, but Dustin doesn’t know anything.” She stops mid-sentence. “Char, you don’t think…”

  “No, I don’t think that Dustin is keeping anything from us. He has been nothing but helpful.”

  “I know I shouldn’t doubt him, but I just worry that he has those bad genes.”

  As I let the water release from the sink, I turn to look at her. “There is no way he is like him. I’ve seen how he looks at you, and I know he loves you. There is absolutely no way he is like Dylan
.”

  “Thanks, Sis. I just doubt sometimes because Dylan is his brother. It’s kinda like, how do they even come from the same family?”

  “I know. That’s one thing I’ve never understood. How do wonderful parents produce children that are so far from their morals and values?”

  Once we finish the dishes, we return to the living room. The sun is starting to set, and it’s time to settle in for the night, or at least, make it look like I am.

  “I think we are going up to my room to find another good movie.”

  Grandma pipes in, “How about a round of cards before you go up? Anyone wanna play?”

  My grandma loves a good game of cards, and who in their right might mind would tell their grandmother no? Tessa and I look at each other, and then she goes to get a deck of cards. We all meet at the dining room table and play a few rounds of Go Fish.

  After Tessa beats us all four times, we throw in the cards, swear she’s a cheater, and retire to our rooms. Tessa comes to hang out with me and lets me know that Cash is on his way to get me.

  I take a minute and freshen up in the bathroom before I climb out of the window and make my way to meet him at the barn. After our night got interrupted last night, I can’t wait to try to finish what we started.

  That’s weird. He’s not here yet. I wait for him on the inside of the barn. I check on the horses and almost jump out of my skin when I hear the door open.

  I turn around and see Cash standing there. “Char-coal, it’s just me,” he says as he makes his way toward me.

  I put down the feed bucket and turn to meet him. I throw my arms around him, and he lifts me off the ground and spins me in a circle.

  “Merry Christmas, Char-coal,” he declares as he puts me back down and kisses my lips. I don’t want him to stop. I want his lips on me forever, but he pulls away. “Let’s get outta here.”

  “Aight, a night at the club sounds good to me.”

  We arrive at the club, and it’s almost like we are repeating last night.

  When I reach the top, I gasp. “Cash! You shouldn’t have.” The club is lit up on the inside with Christmas lights from top to bottom. It’s like a mini prom just for us. Looking at the small table, I see a twenty ounce Choice Cherry Gold and two goblets. Cash excuses himself and places a CD into the player.

  “When did you have time for this?”

  “I wanted to do it last night, but it didn’t work out. I made a CD of all the songs that make me think of us the other night. I wanted you to hear it with me for the first time. When those plans changed last night, I thought I was going to have to wait for who knows how long. Then, you told me he was gone, and I spent my free time today on this."

  “It’s like a fairytale. I love it… and you.” Cash starts the CD, stands and walks toward me. Track number one is a no-brainer; it’s Luke Bryan’s “Crash my Party”. He sings every word as he holds me in his strong and safe arms. I close my eyes and soak him in. He smells like clean sweat and the woods. His touch is rough, yet tender, and his voice is like liquid gold. Without opening my eyes, our lips meet and he tastes like wintergreen mixed with sweet cherries.

  As the song ends and track two begins, I get lost in where I am, who I’m with, and what is going on outside these four walls. I need Cash Money. I want every part of him.

  Trying to make sure that Cash knows what my mind is thinking, I feel him pull away.

  “Cash, please don’t pull away.”

  “Char-coal, I promised you that nothing would happen until our wedding night, and I mean that.”

  “But, what if that doesn’t happen?” He stops and a streak of pain flashes in his eyes.

  “What do you mean, Char-coal?”

  “What if the plan doesn’t work, and I can’t escape him? What if you don’t get the chance to show me?”

  “Listen to me. Remove that thought from your mind because we will get our happily ever after. Don’t you ever doubt that!”

  “It’s just that even Tessa was starting to doubt Dustin today. It made me think that I can’t control everything but here and now… and right now, I want you.” I trail my index finger down his chest. I can feel his breaths increase even as he tries to slow them.

  Cash closes his eyes when my hands reach the top of his belt. “Char… we can’t. This isn’t what tonight is about.”

  I pause and give him a quick kiss. “Then. What. Is. This. About?” I slowly punctuate between each kiss.

  Taking every ounce of control, Cash answers, “Tonight's about the start of a foundation. One that we will base the rest of our lives upon. I want you, Charley Anne, more than anything I’ve ever desired in my entire life. But, when we become one, I don’t want any what ifs, fears, or unknown outcomes. I want you completely. That’s why we can’t.”

  Knowing that I will not win this, I pull myself close to him again as we sway our hips back and forth to the music. I close my eyes and forget about everything but Cash Money and me.

  Chapter 24

  I awake to the sound of the wind blowing outside the club. I smile once I take a minute to realize where I am. Last night was perfect. Our club, Cash Money, and I… alone.

  Cash’s arms are wrapped around me, and I want to stay in them forever, but I know I need to get back before Mama realizes I’m not home. Shit! I hope Dad’s not out on the farm already.

  I begin to move, but Cash squeezes his arms tighter. Deciding exactly how he needs to wake up, I roll toward him, trail my hands up his chest, and place my lips onto his. Once he is very much awake, I pull away from him.

  “Mornin’, Cash Money.”

  He smiles a half-grin and guides my lips back to his. Our make-out session continues, and then Cash slows the movements. He stops and stares at me.

  After not being able to take it anymore, I speak.

  “What?” I say sweetly, tilting my head and allowing my hair to brush his face.

  “I just want to take every bit of you in and sear it in my mind, so that no matter what is going on, we are together.”

  “Cash, we will always be together. You’re my forever, and I’m yours, right? You’re not doubting, are you?”

  “No, but I do have to share you with someone… someone that I want to hang out back and skin him like a deer. You are what gets me through this.”

  “How about we make the best days of our lives while Dylan’s gone?”

  “Sounds like a perfect plan to me. Where do you want to start?”

  “Well, I have an idea,” Cash says as he pulls me closer to him.

  “I think I like your idea.”

  Cash’s lips ignite mine, and I do have to say that I’m starting to understand the importance of us waiting because there is so much more that can happen besides that.

  Seeing the sun begin to get higher in the sky, I know I have to leave Cash, but knowing with the absence of Dylan I don’t have to put him in a bad position makes the day brighter.

  “Hey, Cash, I need to get back. Dad will be at the barn soon, if he isn’t already.”

  “I know.” He kisses me briefly, and we make our way out of the club.

  “Look. I’m going to try to get you as close to the house as possible, but help me look out.”

  “Maybe I should call Tessa?”

  “Great idea, Char-coal. Sometimes I miss the obvious.”

  Grabbing Cash’s phone, I call Tessa. Dad is in the house, so we know we have a few minutes. Jumping on the four-wheeler, we make our way to the barn. Cash kisses me quickly, and I hurry to the house and into my window where Tessa is standing to help me back in.

  Turning around, I see Cash watching. I blow him a kiss, he catches it, and pulls it to his heart. My heart just melted.

  Rushing to help Dad with the morning chores, I change clothes and hurry downstairs to go to the barn.

  “Hey, Charley! Glad to see you this morning,” Dad says from the living room.

  “I was just about to go to the barn to help ya. You’re a little later than normal, are
n’t ya?”

  “Yeah, this old man needed a few extra minutes. My back is all stove up.”

  “You really need to take it easy. I’ll be glad to help while I’m home.”

  “I know, but you also have to train and your friends are coming. It’s just all those years of football catchin’ up with me.”

  “Well, ol’ man, I might be able to help ya out.”

  Dad and I make our way to the barn. I take the bale of hay to the horses, slop the hogs, and check on the goats while he collects the eggs from the chickens. We take care of everything in record time. Dad informs me that he needs to do a little maintenance to the tractor shed.

  “You want me to help?”

  Dad gives me a look that expresses the need for me to drop the subject.

  “Char, I might have been a little slow moving this mornin’, but I ain’t going to the old folks home just yet.”

  “Aight, I get it, Dad. I’ll see you after practice.”

  I leave Dad while he gathers his tools to work and go back to the house. While Mama is putting the finishing touches on breakfast, I hurry upstairs and grab my bag. I walk through the kitchen, talk to her a minute, grab two pieces of bacon, a Choice Cherry Gold and make my way to GPAC.