Trent

by Lindsay Paige

  I shake my head again. “I went and saw Dom in jail last week,” I tell her quietly. “He pretty much told me to get lost and never come back. I’ve already told the lawyer I’m not going to do it.”

  “Oh.” Macy looks sad for me and takes my hand. She’s always been there for me through Dominic’s revolving rehab door and trying to keep him out of trouble. “I know you were still hoping to connect as a family.”

  “He’s my brother. He’ll always be my brother,” I tell her.

  “I know, but you know he’s going to prison for the rest of his life.” She releases my hand and sits back. “Just another reason for you to not get close to Trent.”

  I groan and push my hand through my hair. “All I wanted to do is apologize and nothing more. I never meant for this to happen. I really didn’t.”

  We sit in silence for a moment as I replay the wine tasting through my mind again. It was one of the greatest dates I’ve had in a long time. Our conversation flowed, we laughed, joked, and it was...amazing. But it shouldn’t have happened. I can’t let this go on. I need to tell him who I am and how I’m connected to his life because he might find out from someone else. I rather he find out from me.

  “All right,” Macy breaks the silence. “How was the evening with him?”

  “Perfect,” I tell her sadly.

  “Do you think this is something that could hold water?”

  “Hold water? Have you been watching My Cousin Vinny again?” I love to tease her about her movie obsessions.

  “Maybe.” She winks and I giggle. “But come on, be honest.” She nudges me.

  “Yes. It could hold water.” I roll my eyes.

  “Have you met his daughter?”

  “I saw her one time, but it wasn't planned.”

  She nods. “When are you going to tell him?” Macy eyes me with a stern look.

  “Well, I’m not going to call him. If he contacts me, I will tell him—preferably in person and let him decide what he wants to do.”

  Macy rolls her eyes. “What are you really going to do?”

  “Hide in my house and change my gym membership to this place across town. Oh, and never answer my phone again.”

  We both laugh at my silly answer. Even though it’s what I really want to do, I know I have to take the mature high road. Even if it sucks.

  I stare at my phone for thirty minutes, and I can’t bring myself to answer the text Trent sent me. I want to send him one that says: hey, my brother killed your wife, but can we still be friends?

  I bang my hand against my forehead. How is it that I got myself into this situation? Can’t I just have a normal day?

  Trent: Colby and I can give the boys a tour today at 3. Text me and I’ll tell you where to meet us.

  I know David and Joey would give up all their toys to go on a tour with the favorite player. I can’t deprive them of this. It’ll be their one chance.

  Me: We’ll be there at 3

  Oh, I’m the biggest fool ever. I sigh and call the foster home to let the director know I’ll be picking up the boys. When I look at the clock, I realize I don’t have much time to get everything ready, so I’ll have to go in the clothes I’m in. I look down at my black pants and pink blouse. Why do I care about my clothes? I’m not going to see Trent. I’m doing this for David and Joey. No other reason.

  Trent: Great! Come to the west gate and we’ll be waiting.

  Who am I fooling? This is going to be nothing but another disaster to add to my life. I push all the crazy thoughts out of my head and gather everything to take home.

  When I reach the foster home, I don’t tell David and Joey where I’m taking them. Although, I do tell them they haven’t been adopted yet. I don’t want to torture the kids. They’re bouncing with excitement trying to guess where we’re going. They both cheer when I pull into the Angels parking lot.

  “But there isn’t a game tonight,” Joey informs me.

  “You’re correct. However, look.” I point out to my right when I turn toward the west gate. Standing there in street clothes is Trent and Colby, both smiling about something. I figured the boys would be cheering. When I shut off the car, I turn to face them both. “Colby and Trent are going to give you a private tour of the baseball stadium.”

  Their eyes are wide with shock, and their mouths are hanging open.

  “Okay, if you don’t want to go, we can go back—”

  Before I can finish the sentence, they are scrabbling over each other to get out my car, and I laugh seeing their reactions now. I quickly catch up with them as they reach Colby. I never realized how tall Colby is, but he is almost a head taller than Trent.

  After I introduce David and Joey to Colby, because the boys still can’t speak, Colby leads all of us through the door. The first stop is the locker room. I expected something less clean and smellier. However, it’s much different than I thought.

  “Which one is yours?” I whisper to Trent as Colby shows the boys some equipment.

  “Are you kidding me? Scarlett, this right here is one of the best parts of the job. Most of us don’t mind it at all. The kids are always worth it.” He shrugs as if it really isn't a big deal.

  “That sweet, Trent. It’ll be embedded in their minds forever. I don’t think they’ll ever stop talking about it. Well, once they remember how to talk again.” I laugh at my joke.

  “Think they’ll pass out if we run into anyone else?”

  “Are we going to run into anyone else? Please tell me you don’t have the whole team on the field ready to play catch with them.”

  He chuckles. “No, I wasn’t able to round everyone up for something like that, but I know a few guys are still here somewhere. It’s possible that we’ll run into them.”

  “Shoot. I wish I had brought some baseballs or something for you guys to sign for them.” How could I forget about bringing them something to sign?

  “I’ve already got it covered.” He winks.

  “Really?”

  “Of course. I couldn’t let them come without making sure they leave with some goodies. Colby’s going to give them a bag full of stuff once we’re done.”

  “Trent.” I am suddenly very shy. “Thank you. It’ll mean the world to them. It will mean everything to them. They don’t have much. I bought their equipment so they could play in the public league this summer. It’s hard on them and, well, you know how I feel about them heading down the wrong path.”

  “Wow, you did that for them?”

  “I took out a small loan and made sure they were in. It’s not much, and I try to help all my kids, but baseball equipment is expensive. Nonetheless, the look in their eyes makes me happy every month I write the check.”

  “You’re amazing, Scarlett.”

  “I’m sure that’s not true. But I try.”

  Colby takes us to several other rooms. The boys love the weight room. All the machines are top of the line and a few look as if they're from NASA. Felix and Jordan are working out but stop to talk to everyone. They are quite nice to the kids.

  The tour ends with Trent and Colby playing catch with them out on the field. They even give the boys some pointers. The boys almost pass out at the large bag of balls, hats, and shirts signed by the team. It couldn't have gone better for them.

  “Trent, thank you so much. You didn’t have to, but seriously thank you.”

  “You don’t have to thank me. I was more than happy to do it. And who knows, maybe one day we’ll see Joey and David on the field?”

  “I hope one day I’ll see it. I should get the boys back.” I am nervous as I ask, “Hey, listen, I’m wondering if you want to grab coffee sometime soon.”

  “Yeah, sure. Just let me know when.”

  ***

  SCARLETT SEEMED NERVOUS when she asked me for coffee, which in turn has made me nervous. I’m going in expecting bad news of some capacity. So when she texts me, I’m sitting on the floor in the living room, coloring with Kaelyn.

  “Hey, Granny, do you mind staying
for an extra hour? I need to run out.” If my gut is right, it’ll be a quick trip.

  “Where are you going, Daddy? Can I come?” Kaelyn interrupts any response Granny might make.

  “No, you can’t come.” She pouts, so I kiss her forehead. “I’ll bring you something sweet to eat, okay?”

  That seems to satisfy her. I stand, say goodbye to them, and head out. The clouds are dark and ominous. Hopefully, I can make it back before the bottom falls out. It starts sprinkling on the drive to the cafe. I can see Scarlett inside, sitting at one of the tables, appearing anxious as she scans the room. She gives me a small smile when I walk inside. There’s already an extra cup of coffee on the table, so I head over.

  “Hey, thanks,” I gesture to the cup. “How are you?”

  “I’m good. Thanks for coming. I figure we need to talk. Well, I need to talk.”

  “Okay. What about?”

  “Me. My family. My life might be a better explanation.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I come from a long line of bad people. I watched my mother kill herself with drinking and drugs. I knew a long time ago I didn’t want to be like her. I wanted to be a good person. I wanted to be someone people liked and relied on. When I look at the faces of the kids I help, I want to be their role model.” She keeps talking, full steam ahead like if she doesn’t say it now, she never will.

  “My brother started out being a great kid. A smart kid. I thought if I kept him under my wing, he would be okay. Somewhere in his twenties, I lost him. I lost him to drugs and I watched him wither away from me. I thought, after our mother died, he would realize how bad he was, but instead, he got worse and worse. I sent him to rehab and therapy, anything I could think of, but nothing worked.” She pauses to take a breath and swallows hard. “Almost eight months ago, a phone call informed me my brother had been arrested. I work with Memphis Police a lot, so they called me in and told me what happened. My brother is Dominic Davis. He killed your wife.”

  My brother is Dominic Davis. He killed your wife. Her words echo loudly in my head, but I don’t think I’ve processed them yet. All I can do is stare at her. “What? I...how…” I stammer, unable to form a sentence as it hits me. Her brother is the person who killed my wife.

  “The day I talked to you in the gym, I just wanted to say how sorry I was for what happened. I felt like I needed to say it to you. I feel like the worst person in the world because you’re a great guy. I just wanted to apologize. Everything snowballed and now...now I like you and this is a mess. I don’t want you to think I’m like Dom because I’m not.”

  “But your last name is Knowles,” I blurt out. God, I’m an idiot, but my mind keeps tripping on what she’s told me.

  “We don’t have the same father. Neither one of us knew our fathers. It was always our mom and us. Mainly, I was the adult and I took care of Dom.”

  I cringe. “Please stop saying his name.” I take a deep breath to try to wrap my head around it. “All this time, it’s because you’ve felt sorry for me, for what he did to my family. How could you not tell me sooner?” I’ve been hanging out with the sister of my wife’s murderer, and I never knew it.

  “I tried to figure out how to tell you, but the other night at the wine tasting, it felt like a date, and you can’t date me because of who I am. I’m not a liar. I’m not someone who tries to con people or hurt them intentionally. I like you, Trent, but you need to know who I am to make a fair judgement call.”

  Something about what she says triggers a memory. “You were considering speaking on his behalf.” Everything about my words and my tone is an accusation.

  “I was going to tell them the truth though. He’s a drug addict who was strung out and was looking for his next fix. I was never going to stand up and lie. Dom…I mean…” She takes a steadying breath. “My brother put himself in jail by doing a most heinous crime, and I’m not going to defend him. I believe, no, I know he needs to spend the rest of his life in prison. That’s what I was going to say.”

  I shake my head in disbelief, choking on my words as every emotion known to man overwhelms me. “He killed my wife, Scarlett. He took my little girl’s mother away from her. She didn’t deserve it.”

  “She didn’t and neither did you. He deserves everything that happens to him. He deserves to hear your hurt and anger and every other emotion you’re feeling. He needs to wake up every day and remember what a horrible thing he did to you, to Kaelyn, and to your wife. He will wake up behind bars every day because that’s what he deserves.”

  I stand, in desperate need of fresh air. “I need to go. I told my grandmother I wouldn’t be gone long.” I don’t give her a chance to reply before I walk out.

  The rain is pouring, but the cold droplets feel good against my skin. My emotions are stuck in my throat and I have no clue what I want to do. I feel pulled in twenty different directions—from punching something, to feeling bad for Scarlett because her brother is a murderer, to wanting to sit in my car and cry over my loss.

  Instead, I drive. I drive aimlessly until my mood calms enough that I can go home. About thirty minutes pass before I arrive home. I’m still in a daze, trying to figure out what all of this means, aside from the obvious.

  “Daddy! Where’s my sweet treat?” Kaelyn runs to me the moment I step inside.

  “Sorry, Kaelyn. I forgot it. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, okay? Why don’t you go get ready for bed?”

  “But—” she begins to object.

  “Go get ready for bed,” I repeat with a more direct tone. Her shoulders fall in disappointment, but she shuffles her feet down the hallway. I walk pass Granny and into the kitchen. Against what I was hoping, she follows me.

  “Want to explain to me why you’re sending her to bed an hour early?” she asks as I grab a bottle of water from the fridge, wishing it were something alcoholic instead.

  I turn to face her and lean against the counter. “The girl, the friend from the gym, who went with me to the winery?” Granny nods. “Her brother is Dominic Davis.”

  The words hang heavily in the air between us.

  “Excuse me? That Dominic Davis?”

  “Do we know another one?” I comment wryly.

  “Oh, Trent. I don’t know what to say. What did she say? Oh my Lord, did she hurt you? Did she try?”

  I shake my head. “We met at the gym because she saw me and wanted to apologize for what he did. Things went from there and she told me tonight because she felt like I needed to know. She’s a social worker. She helps kids and tries to keep them in line. She’s not like him, but I don’t know what to do with this.”

  “I’m not going to say I’m happy with this, but what do you think? You seemed to be in a different mood this past week. Is it because of her?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. I just don’t know about any of it.”

  “I understand, but you know I’m going to ask if you caused a scene with her. I mean, we don’t need your name in the papers anymore.”

  “No, it was basically a regular conversation. I left a bit abruptly, but I didn’t do anything to make someone pay attention to us. I feel bad for leaving like I did, but I couldn’t keep sitting there either.”

  “You feel bad? Why?”

  “It’s not her fault she’s related to him, or that he did what he did, or the fact that I wanted to cringe every time she said his name. The impact of what she said and having that day play in my head over and over was just too much.”

  “You’re being very mature about this right now, Trent, but I can see the rage and hurt in your face. I know deep down you want to explode, but there’s something there. Do you...do you like her? It seems like you’re almost defending her?” she frowns in her confusion.

  “I don’t know, Granny. I enjoyed being around her, sure, but...God, why did the one person I’ve been able to talk to have to be her? What am I supposed to do?”

  “You do what you always do. You listen to the little voice in your head. You’ve
always made good decisions. You wouldn’t have spent time with this girl if you didn’t like her or trust her. Deny it all you want, I know it’s true. You have been in a good mood for the last week or so. However, she could be pulling your leg. Her brother is a murderer. He murdered your wife and the mother of your child. It’s something one can’t just gloss over.”

  “I know what he did!” I instantly regret raising my voice.

  “Then answer this, would you allow her to be around Kaelyn?”

  “Daddy, are you coming to tuck me in?” I glance over at my precious little girl in her mismatched pajamas.

  “Yeah.” I walk over to her and pick her up. “What story do you want me to read tonight?”

  “Cinderella. Can we have a sleepover in your room?”

  “What’s wrong with your bed?”

  She glances down, avoiding my gaze once I take the book. “I accidentally broke my nightlight. It was an accident, I swear, Daddy. I didn’t mean it,” she tells me fiercely. “It’s scary without it, but if I stay in your room, you can protect me.”

  “Okay, you can sleep in my room.” She hugs me tightly as I walk across the hallway. “How did you accidentally break your nightlight, Kaelyn?” I ask, sitting her down on the bed.

  She lifts her shoulders and drops them. “I don’t remember.”

  I’m too tired to press her, so I slip off my shoes and lay on the bed next to her. After tucking her in, I open the book and begin to read. It’s the perfect distraction.

  For most of the week, I avoid thinking about Scarlett or the question Granny left me with. I don’t want to think about it, so I’ve been keeping myself busy. My time is either focused on baseball or Kaelyn. We’ve been talking about Deborah a lot this week because Mother’s Day is this weekend, our first without her.