Strictly Stuck

by Crystal D. Spears

  “Hey babe.”

  “So want to patch things up shrug this shit behind us,” I tease him trying to lighten the mood. He falls for it that gorgeous face lights up shaking his head yes so fast his blonde bangs flop into his eyes.

  Fucking gorgeous son of a bitch!

  Gah!

  “Good because I miss you,” I say honestly.

  “I miss you too Jade and I’m sorry I was a complete fucking asshole. You didn’t deserve any of that shit. I crossed a huge line and I’m sorry but I still don’t regret having sex with you.”

  I can’t breathe. Back up repeat that shit!

  “Nate I do because we wouldn’t have fought and none of this would have happened.”

  He rolls his eyes and blows out a breathe forcing his bangs out of his eyes. Damn that stupid blonde shaggy hair it’s so hot.

  “I don’t regret it babe nothing you say or do is going to make me change my mind. It happened if I can’t have you that way at least I have you as my friend. I love you so if friendship is what I get so fucking be it.”

  He makes it sound so simple and it’s fucking not I’m going to agree with him though save us another stupid argument.

  “Okay so fucking be it,” I agree.

  “Great so what’s going on with Amber?”

  Oh hell no! I haven’t even talked to her no way am I spilling her beans. It’s not my life it’s hers.

  “No way Nate you know how I feel about sharing others secrets. I’m a bitch but not that big of one. Not my secret to share please don’t ask me again,” I plead.

  I have to plead because Nate has a way of getting shit out of me when I don’t wanna talk. The only thing he can’t get out of me is my past or my feelings.

  Nate smiles that sexy ass smile showing a full frontal glow of naturally white teeth.

  Swoon!

  See I have a weakness for this man. Must remind myself I am taking not once, twice but three times over and over again.

  He explains to me what happened between him and Sheila he also tells me it wasn’t that great. The chemistry just wasn’t there and they both agreed to never talk about it again. I was under the impression it happened more than once but guess not.

  —Nate’s Thoughts

  Damn her and her fucking freckles. Why the fuck did I have to be so damn stupid? I mean seriously my best friend handed herself to me on a silver platter! And what do I do? I fuck it up just like I always do when it comes to her. I’ve always loved her. She’s Jade. That’s all there is to say she’s just Jade. My best friend. My confidant. My beautiful, sexy and smart Jade. Sleeping with her was…blissful. Yeah blissful. It was extremely hot and blissful. Dammit! It was fucking great! And I push her away? What the fuck is wrong with me? She’s smiling at me and my heart is pounding in my damn chest just from that one smile. FUCK! I run my fingers through my hair and mutter a string of curses under my breath.

  I thought telling her about Sheila was going to be hard. No — letting her go — only having her as a friend that’s fucking hard.

  Chapter Seven — Part Two — Jade

  I’m smiling at him it’s forced I’m shocked he doesn’t notice that fact. I mean he’s running his fingers through his hair and mutter curses to himself. I just want my best friend back so I am choosing to ignore this. I mean what else is there to say? I have three boyfriends and one of them might me a father soon. My life is a complete and utter fucking mess but I couldn’t be happier with it. Dammit my mind is all over the fucking place I’m sadistic that’s what I am. I enjoy doing this shit to myself. We chat a little while longer before saying goodbye. I head to my morning lectures and find Brayden waiting for me at the door. This will be strange having him with me instead of him being surrounded by a shit ton of girls.

  “Hey sexy,” he grins at me.

  I’m knocked back two steps in my mind. One being he looks fucking so damn edible I can’t focus. Two being we still haven’t had our talk. He’s leaning one foot on the wall and the other on the ground. His light blue jeans with holes in them not from being warn down. No — these were bought like this. They fit him so perfectly. His black motorcycle books with not one spec or scuff on them. His white tee hugging his biceps and chest tightly. His tattoo sleeve teasing me. I look back up to his coal black stare his eyes gleaming at me..

  Shit! Totally busted checking him out. Oh who cares he’s my boyfriend right? Yeah that’s how I justify this.

  “Checking me out,” he groans pushing off the wall stalking towards me his fingers fist through my hair. My mouth drops open to protest. Hell I don’t know why. Before I can utter a single word his mouth smashes down to mine causing me to whimper. Damn his lips are soft. His tongue teases my bottom lip begging for entrance and I gladly admit him in. Our tongues tangle. Every lap his tongue makes feels like were doing the tango. It’s precision. Brayden fucking kisses with expertise. Oh god my pussy tightens what if he fucks with expertise too?

  “I don’t feel like going to class now,” I pant pulling away from his grinning beautiful mouth.

  “No,” he teases.

  “No — I really don’t,” I take his hand and start dragging him down the hallways.

  “Where are we off too,” he chuckles with his deep baron laugh.

  “We’re going to find a place to have sex so help me find the where? You can’t kiss me like that it’s not right.”

  “Aw did I get Jade worked up?”

  Oh no he didn’t! I stop dead in my tracks and turn around to find him smiling at me.

  “Really Bray?”

  “I was just messin around sexy — come on,” he grabs my hand and this time he’s dragging me.

  I giggle and try to keep my feet at an easy pace but it’s still not enough he’s laughing at me his beautiful smile directed at me. Bray always makes me giggle. And I’m not a fucking giggler. This is what I love the most about Bray. I can be the me I was before my freshman year of college before my life went to hell. Before I had to up and transfer to a different college.

  Fuck did I say love?

  Oh dear god

  I need help!

  “Where we going Bray?”

  I grab the helmet from him and slip it on. I love his Ducati I’ve yet rode it until now though. It’s black and silver. It fits him.

  “My house sexy — I want you on my bed.”

  The way his eyes cut straight to mine when he says ‘my bed’ about kills me.

  I bite my lip.

  “Come on jump on,” he pats behind him.

  “Okay,” I’m not even hesitant I trust him for some reason I already trust him. I ponder on that for a second in my head. Yeah I really do trust him I make up my mind.

  “Hold on tight,” he starts the motorcycle and the light purr between my legs causes a light whimper to escape my throat.

  “Yeah — she’ll do that to ya baby,” he idles us out of the campus lot. He doesn’t race or try to show off he just keeps us at a steady speed the short distance to his place.

  I can never get over how big this beach house is. I’m not used to being surrounded by people with money. Everything I have is from maxing out credit cards and using up my student loans.

  He cuts off the purring and runs his fingers through his now messy hair. He gave me his helmet he turns slightly giving me a crooked smile with a wink. I swear he’s going to kill me.

  “Come on,” he pulls the helmet off my head after he climbs off.

  I shake my head my hair feels all flat so I try poofing it with my fingers some.

  “You look fine you’re sexy so let’s go,” he lifts me off the bike effortlessly.

  I get nervous all of a sudden. Me nervous this is new. What is it about Brayden that makes me feel like I’m not worthy of him?

  Oh right that’s it — because I’m not worthy.

  Brayden is a bad ass but one of those that has a great heart. He’s kind, smart, rich and extremely sexy. He’s also very considerate. Even when I was with Layden the first time he
always treated me right even if I was his brothers girl. He was always genuinely nice to me. My mind is so wrapped up in my thoughts I don’t even notice we’ve walked a flight of stairs and he’s guiding me into his bedroom.

  It’s definitely Brayden. All white and black but the man does love his candles. They are everywhere on his dresser and nightstand. I can hear the ocean waves lapping the shore I walk over to the sliding glass door just to look out. It’s serene just standing there looking out. I sigh as Brayden comes up behind me wrapping his strong arms around me and placing his chin on my shoulder.

  “Jade you ready to talk?”

  I sigh and lean my forehead against the cool glass. I close my eyes and beg myself not to tell him anything at all. I don’t know how he does this. Breaks my barriers down.

  “Brayden please don’t,” I plead it comes out in just a whisper.

  “Baby — it can’t be that bad.”

  If he only knew. I’m not a bitch for no reason. You don’t just build up a hate wall for no reason. You don’t just keep people out for no reason. Can’t he see this?

  “What part of my life do you want Bray?”

  I don’t turn around — I don’t move and I sure as hell don’t open my eyes.

  Tears are streaming down my face and I haven’t even told him anything yet.

  “Any part Jade, I’ve known you for almost a year and I know nothing about your life.”

  But he does. He knows this me. He knows the me I’m allowing him to know.

  “You do though Brayden you know the me I am trying to be,” I whisper.

  “I wanna know the real Jade,” he whispers back in my ear.

  My heart shatters in that moment. What do you say to that? What do you say to an amazing man who wants to know the real you?

  I make the decision to share just a little with him. I inhale and quietly exhale.

  “I’m an orphan, I’m poor I have no family. I never knew my mom and my dad died with I was eleven from a car accident. I grew up in a nice foster home. They were doctors well they are doctors. I never wanted for anything but I was still poor that money is theirs. I busted my butt to get into college myself.”

  I take another big inhale and don’t even bother with exhaling this time.

  “Even though I got good grades I still did shit that got me into trouble. I got pregnant at sixteen but lost the baby within the first few weeks. I’m not upset about it though. It happened — Taylor and I were too young to be parents. Besides there is a reason for everything that happens. I put my foster parents through hell and back. They put up with me until my freshman year of college. I fucked up and almost ruined the family name. Mom still talks to me but Dad doesn’t — Mom tries to send me money and I send it back.”

  I exhale a huge breath I’m done he doesn’t need to know the rest.

  “What happened freshman year,” he asks.

  “Not now Brayden I’ve shared enough.”

  He doesn’t say anything for a few minutes.

  “One more question Jade,” he whispers sending shivers down my spine.

  “What?”

  “What happened with you and Taylor?”

  Fuck!

  “We dated until freshman year until I fucked up and it broke his heart. Brayden I’m seriously done answering questions.”

  “Okay baby,” his hand caresses the inside of my thigh.

  — Brayden’s Thoughts

  I listen to her tentatively. Her voice as she speaks breaks my heart. It’s full of regret, sadness and loneliness. I don’t fucking like it at all. She didn’t start getting under my skin until the night at the bar. Sure I’ve always found her fucking sexy. She’s Jade. Every damn male on campus knows who Jade is. It’s impossible not to. But while she was with Layden and only him I never once looked at her as more than a friend. Now that I have her my body aches to know her. My mind scrambles to figure her out. My heart — well fuck — the girl makes my heart speed up so damn fast you would think I had Layden’s old coke habit.

  I find myself jealous of this Taylor guy. He’s obviously a very important part of her life. And knowing she fucked it up and broke his heart makes me wonder. Makes me wonder about him and whether or not she still loves him. I’m not about to ask that fucking question though because she’s done answering or telling me shit.

  I’m shocked she shared all this with me. But— when she slowly turns around and wipes her weeping eyes and looks up through those long eyelashes — I all but buckle to the floor. And what she says next about kills me.

  Chapter Eight — Jade

  Dear Mental Diary,

  I just shared a ton of shit with Brayden.

  I don’t know how the fuck he gets to me like this. He reminds me of Taylor in so many ways.

  Jade

  I slowly turn around and wipe my eyes and look up at him. He’s breathing heavily and caressing me with such care.

  “Please don’t tell them Bray please,” I beg.

  He sucks in a surprised breathe.

  “Baby why would I give them a piece of you that I only have?”

  His statement and question shock the hell outta me. And before I have time to react he’s picking me up and carrying me over to the bed. He lays me down gently like I’m a fragile little china doll.

  “You can be yourself with me Jade. No walls — no barriers just yourself.” He slides off my flip flops throwing them behind him. “You trusted me with something important to you so I’m gonna trust you with something important to me.” Brayden takes his shirt off tossing it on the floor his eyes never leaving mine.

  “What,” I ask.

  He leans over me and I can’t help but dance my fingers across his strong muscular chest. The man wasn’t made to just look at. He takes one of my roaming hands and places it over his heart. “I’m gonna trust you with this okay,” he whispers.

  I suck in a breath and bite my lip. The man just gave me his fucking heart. I can’t say anything. This perfect man the one who doesn’t pressure me who accepts me anyway he can have me — just gave me his fucking heart! Tears just start flowing freely now. I can’t talk I’m afraid my words would ruin our moment so I just nod.

  He bends down barely hovering his lips above mine. “Yeah,” he asks.

  “Yeah,” I finally whisper.

  His lips are soft against mine. He doesn’t slip his tongue into my mouth he just slowly pecks me. It’s perfect and just when I think he can’t make the beginning any better he says something I’ve never heard before. “I’m gonna love you now,” he grins against my lips.

  My heart melts. See! He’s this bad ass sweetheart. He leans up and slowly works my shorts off me. I lift my ass and I can’t help but smile at this man and his declaration. My man — my declaration.

  “No more cold detached Jade around me okay,” he groans when he sees I don’t have any underwear on.

  “I promise.”

  Brayden slowly lifts me into a sitting position pulling my shirt off me. I hear my phone chirp in my purse letting me know my next lecture is starting.

  “Brayden we have two hours. I have to meet Amber for lunch— remember and it’s important.”

  “Two hours will do for now,” he grumbles causing me to laugh.

  “What two hours isn’t long enough,” I tease.

  “No baby two hours isn’t long enough to love you,” he whispers leaning me back down once I’m naked.

  Oh my! I don’t have anything to fucking say to that.

  Brayden climbs all the way onto the bed and pulls me up with him. Once he’s satisfied with how I’m laying his gorgeous ass walks over on his knees to my feet.

  “Brayden baby what are you doing?”

  “Well—,” he picks up one of my feet raising my leg a little “you see if I’m going to love you I’m going to love all of you.”

  “You’re crazy you know that,” I giggle.

  “Yeah baby I know that,” he whispers against my heel before kissing it.

  I squee an
d try kicking away from him. It tickles and the jerk laughs at me.

  “Ah — my sexy Jade is ticklish,” he gets in between my legs “that is good information.”

  Brayden kisses a slow torturous path up my legs and the insides of my thighs. I’ve never once felt this way before sex. My heart is racing my body is already shivering. Bray reaches my core stops and looks up at me.

  “You don’t need this tattoo to tell me what to do with it baby,” his coal black stare telling me hes serious.

  “It was a bet,” I mumble.

  “I would definitely eat you no matter what.” And then his gaze disappears and his tongue laps me and I moan out. One hand is caressing my right leg while his other is busy working my core with his tongue. I lean up to watch its sensual each caress he makes whether it be his tongue or fingers makes me his even more. But only I’m not I belong to three guys and that’s seriously fucked up.

  “Jade baby—stop fucking thinking,” he growls “I must be doing something wrong if you’re able to think.”

  Is he fucking serious? Before I can reply his teeth tug on my piercing.

  “Shit,” I moan.

  “Ah — my girl needs it rough and soft at the same time.”

  I can’t respond because now I feel like the bastard is trying to kill me.

  It takes no time for my body to start quivering I throw my arm over my mouth and bite back the loudest moan I’ve ever tried to release.

  I’m sweating and shaking. I’ve never felt anything like that before in my life. He’s crawling up my body using his tongue I can’t concentrate what is he doing to me?

  “Brayden — I can’t think.”

  “Good,” he grunts as he reaches over to the bed side table.

  He doesn’t open the condom just yet he lays it to the side and flips me over and runs his hands up the back of my legs onto my ass.

  “Your body is so beautiful baby,” he sexily whispers while palming my ass “I’m gonna love you so rough and soft at the same time baby — you won’t even remember your name.”