Cliché

by Ryleigh Sloan

  When I nodded, she walked to the door, turning just before she left the room. “Fake it till you make it, Claire.”

  I walked out of the bathroom a few minutes later, repeating the mantra to myself. “Fake it till you make it, fake it till you make it.”

  As I walked across the room I relaxed my shoulders, took a deep breath and caught Kate’s eye. She winked at me as I reached for my glass resting on the cocktail table. Kevin was distracted by yet another well-wisher and absently squeezed my hand as he spoke. I took the time to scan the room, looking for the actors I most admired to distract myself from thinking about Kevin’s earlier statement. Aside from Kate, I hadn’t met anyone I’d fan-girled over and I really didn’t want to. They say “never meet your idol” for a reason.

  A few moments later we were ushered to our seats, the lights dimmed and the award ceremony got underway, leaving Kevin no time to pick up where he left off. I was grateful for that. During the course of the evening I found the excitement contagious and before I knew it, I was really enjoying myself. Although Kate didn’t know the reason I was so wound up, her advice was sound and I realised I was no longer faking it. When Kevin’s category came up, I squeezed his hand as they announced the nominees, praying that he’d get the award. He didn’t, Travis Jameson won it for the role he played as an undercover cop working for a trafficking ring. I looked to Kevin as Megan Shoal and Brad Evert announced the winner, disappointment heavy in my heart, expecting the same on his face.

  It shouldn’t have surprised me to see Kevin on his feet, beaming from ear to ear as he clapped for his peer but it did, and the sight made me proud and reminded me what I loved about him. At the heart of it, Kevin was truly the most selfless person I knew, always considering the needs of others before his own. The hurt I’d been harbouring from earlier slowly ebbed away as I embraced Kevin and he smiled down at me. What he did, he did for me, to protect me and to protect us. I just needed to remember that.

  Chapter Eighteen

  After tossing and turning for what felt like hours, I decided I’d take a picnic to Kevin. I figured that if I was this wired from the day’s activities, Kevin would be too and we could decompress together. I ordered a bottle of champagne, a cheese platter, and chocolate-covered strawberries from room service, which they so kindly packed in a basket for me, and I headed to Kevin’s room, excited about my surprise.

  What I didn’t expect was Hayley Stephens answering the door. I stood there, picnic basket in hand and blinking as she smiled at me in all her perfection from the other side of the door. Somehow, she managed to make jeans and a sweater look elegant and here I was in my well-worn candy-striped pyjama bottoms with matching top that said, “Keep calm and poop rainbows.” (a gift from Kevin for Christmas two years ago), no makeup, and my hair piled on top of my head in a messy bun.

  If this girl had a flaw I couldn’t see it. Her hair hung in waves to about mid-back a few shades lighter than her almost black eyes. As she stood looking at me with an easy smile spread over shimmering white teeth, I couldn’t help but make comparisons.

  “You must be Claire, I’ve heard so much about you. I’m Hayley.” She gave me a quick hug and if I wasn’t all blinking and flustered, I might have appreciated how sweet it was that she didn’t take for granted I knew who she was. Of course I did though. Aside from the fact that she was number one on iTunes, I’d googled the crap out of her.

  Her eyes went to the basket in my hand. “Great minds think alike.” She gestured towards the balcony to the two half empty champagne flutes set on the table. Stepping aside, she ushered me in to the lounge area of the suite taking the basket from me and setting it on the midnight-blue wingback chair.

  “Please tell me that’s room service.” Kevin walked out of the bedroom. He was shirtless, tiny beads of water splashed onto his naked chest as he towel-dried his hair. The pair of sweatpants hugging his hips in just the right spot to give a delicious peak of his “fuck me” muscles. I didn’t miss the look of appreciation Hayley shot him and I can’t say I blamed the girl.

  “Oh, hey!” His voice warm and welcoming.

  Heat crept up my cheeks as I realised I’d interrupted a moment. I grabbed the basket and started backing towards the door. “I’m so sorry, I should’ve called. I…I’m gonna go.” I indicated to the door with the hand not clenched around the basket handle like a vice. I was mortified I’d taken for granted that he’d be alone.

  “No…Wait, Claire. Don’t go. I see you’ve met Hayley?” Kevin started making his way across the room.

  “I did.” I looked at Hayley. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise he had company.”

  Hayley reached for the picnic basket and short of going into a tug of war with her, I let go. She placed it delicately on the carpet.

  “Please don’t go, I was just—”

  “No, really,” I interrupted. “It’s fine. Please…carry on with…” I flushed a deeper red and my stomach clenched. “I mean, I thought he was alone. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” My mortification increased as I realised I was talking about Kevin as though he weren’t standing five feet away from me. He looked on in confusion and my shoulder bumped the doorframe as I misjudged while trying to escape with whatever dignity I had left. Where was an apocalypse when you needed one?

  Hayley took two steps and placed her hands on my arms. “Please don’t go, if you do I’ll feel terrible. Worse than I do for spilling champagne all over Kev and getting him all sticky.” Her phone rang and she dug in her oversized bag sitting on the ornate oak table next to the door. Hayley frowned at her screen, then looked at Kevin apologetically.

  “I’ve gotta take this, it’s my manager.”

  Hayley looked at me. “Please don’t leave yet. I won’t be long.” She tapped her screen with her long lilac nails then walked across the room, talking quietly into her phone.

  “You okay? You look kinda shell-shocked.” Kevin’s voice was laced with concern as he tugged me gently back into the room and closed the door.

  I grappled for something to say that wasn’t, “I’m fine. I just want the earth’s core to swallow me up for walking into what was obviously a party for two.” An intimate one at that. What I came up with sounded just as lame.

  “Well, y’know, I didn’t expect to meet Hayley Stephens in my pjs.”

  “I’m sorry, I tried to call. I wanted you to come meet her but when you didn’t answer I figured you were asleep.”

  “I guess that will teach me to check my phone before I show up in my pyjamas, huh?” I flushed. I’d been exhausted after the Oscars and could barely keep my eyes open. I felt bad for flaking on Kevin on his big night but he knew how I felt and wanted me to get some rest. Of course he wanted me to sleep in his suite, but I was still wary about being seen entering and leaving his room after the incident with Bruce but moments after I lay down on the bed, it was like a switch flipped and I was wide awake. Apparently, my concerns about being seen flew out the window with my exhaustion.

  He pulled me in for a quick hug. “You look adorable in those pjs.”

  I stepped out of Kevin’s arms just as Hayley ended her call and turned around. I wasn’t sure what Kevin had told her about me and our “arrangement”. I knew he’d told her he wanted to protect me from the media but if he’d told her more than that I didn’t know and really didn’t want the moment any more uncomfortable than it already was—like that could ever be possible.

  “I’m so sorry for being rude.” She smiled at me then looked at Kevin. “I told Sam I was coming here to go over the concert details and Sam being Sam wants to make a PR moment out of it. Y’know, positive media to counteract what happened last night.” Hayley reached over and squeezed my hand. “I’m so sorry about that, by the way. I feel awful that you were dragged into this. Kevin told me how shaken up you were.”

  Well that answered the question of what Hayley knew, and I started rambling in my embarrassment. “Yeah, it was…intense. I honestly don’t know how you guys do it. Living
in the spotlight. Being followed around. Getting your room bugged.” I smiled, mainly because I’d noticed Kevin tensing. It was slight, almost imperceptible, but I knew him well enough to note his “tells”.

  “Oh, you get used to it. It becomes part of your life, after a while you don’t even notice the lenses following you around.”

  I shook my head. “I’d never get used to it. I honestly couldn’t think of anything worse.” I stopped talking and bit my lip, realising what I just said. “I’m sorry, that was…I guess what I’m trying to say is—”

  “It’s okay. Honestly, it’s not for everyone. Some days I feel like I must be mad to put myself through this but the negative is a small price to pay for doing what I love.” Her words were sincere and I suddenly knew why Kevin raved about her all the time.

  Hayley walked to the mini-fridge and bent down to inspect the contents. “Since Mr. Manners over there hasn’t bothered to offer you a drink, can I?”

  Kevin came to life. “Sorry. Have a seat.” He indicated to the couch as he stood beside Hayley. “What can I get you?”

  They both looked at me expectantly, like host and hostess waiting for me to make a decision. Hayley was so comfortable rooting around in his fridge that I instantly knew that while this was only his second night in this room, being in Kevin’s personal space wasn’t new to her.

  My mouth went so dry I thought my tongue was glued to my palate but I didn’t want a drink. I wanted to get out of there and the urgency increased with every moment that passed.

  “You know what? I’m kinda wiped out. It’s been a long day.”

  “Oh no! I thought we could all go out? Sam thought you and I...” She waved her hand in between herself and Kevin. “Should be seen in public tonight. Show the world we’re not heading for “Splitsville”. I was thinking Claire could come with—”

  “Uh,” I began.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Kevin said at the same time.

  “Sam’s going to send Harry to take the pics, no one else will know. It’ll be good for people to see us all having a good time. It’ll take the heat off Claire.”

  I opened my mouth to speak but Kevin cut me off. He pointed to me. “Look, I know what you’re trying to do here and I appreciate it but I’m not getting Claire involved in this.”

  “She’s already involved, Kev. Two drinks and a few happy snaps tops.”

  Kevin’s lips pressed into a razor thin line. “She’s not a pawn in our game, Hayley. You weren’t there last night. You didn’t hear what he said about her.”

  “I know, that’s what I’m saying. If they see us playing happy family they’ll lay off—”

  “Look, we’re not doing this.” I felt like a spectator at a table tennis game where I was the ball. Kevin’s fingers squeezed so tightly around the water he’d taken from the fridge in anticipation of my answer that I thought the top was going to pop off any moment. The glare he was shooting at Hayley was so icy I feared she’d catch a cold.

  I’d had enough. I was exhausted to the point of laying down right where I was standing awkwardly, hoping these two would stop talking about me like I wasn’t there. I was beyond embarrassed at barging in on what was a private celebration and then being treated like a guest in their happy “home” when Kevin and I had spent more time together naked than clothed. And finally, I was hitting my max of letting Kevin act like God-of-all-I-do-next. I don’t know where he got the idea that he was my personal spokesman, but that shit was ending right now.

  “Look, I appreciate you both looking out for me and all but I’m exhausted. Help yourselves to the basket. I think the champagne’s warm by now but it’s yours if you want it.”

  Shit, that sounded sarcastic and bitchy, which was not at all how I wanted the gesture to come across. I started heading to the door but remembered my manners despite my temper. “It was really great to meet you, Hayley. I’m looking forward to your concert tomorrow.”

  Hayley returned the sentiment but I could tell she was confused. The mood in the room had taken a drastic dive.

  “Claire-Bear.” Kevin took a step towards me.

  I met him halfway and gave him a peck on the cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? I need to get some sleep. Go out and have a good time.”

  “I don’t want to leave you.”

  “Hayley’s right. You need to be seen together. It will help get the press off my back.”

  Kevin still looked reluctant, so I hugged him and fixed a smile on my face.

  “Go have a good time.” I walked out of the room and closed the door, barely managing to swallow down the tears of humiliation.

  I managed to make my way back to my room with what little dignity I had left. Adrenaline prevented me from getting any sleep despite how tired I was. By the time I’d made myself some tea and was seated on the balcony overlooking one of the most exciting cities in the world, I was still feeling thoroughly embarrassed but the urge to burst into tears had passed.

  The wind was chilly and I reached for the hoodie I’d left on the lounger earlier, pulling it over my pyjama top and wrapping my fingers around my mug, but I didn’t want to go inside. The nippy night air helped me clear the bombardment of thoughts I couldn’t make sense of for overthinking everything. As my head cleared I felt better, conversations I’d had with Kevin replayed in my mind and I realised I’d overreacted. He and Hayley were friends and their “relationship” was to protect both me and Hayley. It made complete sense they would spend time together.

  I reached into my hoodie pocket and picked up my phone, noting three missed calls and two text messages from Kevin sent two hours ago.

  Kev: Hey. Hayley’s on her way over to discuss some logistics for tomorrow and share some good news. I know you’re tired but I’d love for her to meet you.

  Twenty minutes later.

  Kev: You’re probably asleep by now but if you see this come over anytime. Hayley’s here. No one is going to care if they see you coming to my room. I want you with me, Claire-Bear.

  I felt like such an idiot for overreacting and was humiliated all over again. Kevin was with Hayley but he was sending me messages—wanting to include me. I realised in that moment that my feelings for Kevin were clouding my judgment and I’d jumped to conclusions. Seeing him so comfortable with her, comfortable enough to take a shower while she was there, sparked insecurities in me that had nothing to do with Kevin and Hayley—they were performers, for God’s sake, they were used doing that sort of thing around each other—but more to do with the fact that I hadn’t been honest with Kevin and I needed that to change.

  I needed to speak to Kevin about my feelings. He deserved to know things had changed for me and I was going to tell him as soon as he was done with the concert.

  The twist in my stomach that had slowly been untangling tightened into a double crown knot and I was suddenly nervous. This was huge. Life-changing.

  Suddenly I was exhausted. I pulled off the hoodie and crept into bed. I couldn’t believe I’d got myself worked up over nothing. Tomorrow, things were going to change.

  Chapter Nineteen

  The arena was pitch black. All around me, people jumped up and down as they chanted for Hayley to appear on stage. The excitement was palpable, a physical entity that pulsed and vibrated and beat against the restless crowd. Mass Production, the opening act for Hayley, had knocked it out of the park; doing an outstanding job of riling up the crowd as well as distracting me. The lead singer was cute in his average Joe kind of way but when he opened his mouth, I swear every single girl in the stadium’s ovaries started humming. His voice, a flawless falsetto, embraced you and gave you those teeny tiny tingles in your belly.

  As the crowd grew louder and louder, my nerves grew along with my excitement. When Kevin was on stage, whether it be the big screen or theatre or as a guest appearance at a rock star’s concert, he consumed you. He could just as easily make a number one selling album but acting was his first love. This concert was a favour to Hayley, w
ho thought that having her new love interest perform with her would build up the hype for her upcoming tour.

  The band started playing and blue lights filtered the stage. A sassy voice dripping with sex filled the stadium a beat before Hayley stepped into the light, singing the first verse of her latest hit. Oh…my…God, she was gorgeous. If I thought she was perfect last night, I was at a loss for describing her as she was on stage. Dressed in a white sequined pantsuit with a matching crop top, she strode onto centre stage in silver stilettos, radiating confidence. The crop top was so short it just covered her nipples, yet she swung her arms around and swaggered on the stage with complete abandon. Smoky eye-makeup highlighted her onyx eyes. High cheekbones and full burgundy lips added to the package. As she moved across the stage, her dark, wavy hair caressed her golden back, whispering against the single tie keeping her top in place. She was the perfect mix of sweet and sassy, teasing the crowd with a mischievous smile, the tattoos covered by her sweater the previous evening now beautifully on display.

  I watched her, completely mesmerised, until the first verse ended and she addressed the crowd.

  “Hello, LA, how are you tonight?”

  The fans went ape-shit.

  Whistles and screams echoed around the room. Her voice was just as sexy when she spoke as when she sang and I couldn’t help wondering how it would sound in Kevin’s ear. I shook my head; I was here to prove a point to myself and thoughts like that weren’t helpful.

  “I have a little surprise for you tonight. Anyone follow social media?” The screaming intensified and Hayley gave a knowing wink. “Then you’ll know I have a new man in my life.” She waited a moment for the crowd to settle so she could finish her sentence, chuckling into the mic. “That said, it is my pleasure,” (There was a hint of innuendo in the word pleasure) “to welcome onstage, the incredible Kevin Peyton!”