by J. H. Croix
Noah considered his uncle. “Like you said, Theo doesn’t have the resources or the planning capacity to be doing much. But he’s always after easy money and doesn’t care much how he gets it. I don’t know if it’ll be worth it, but I don’t mind trying to talk to him. We were never close. He’s my father’s brother, and needless to say, I wasn’t close to my father either. But maybe Theo will talk if I try.”
***
Lily stood in line at Roxanne’s Country Store and tapped her foot restlessly. She had to get out of Jake’s office, but even now, after a brisk walk that left her ears almost numb from the cold, her body hummed with electricity. Jake asked her to come by today to help with a few things, but she had no idea Noah was stopping by. Jake would flip his lid if he knew she was with Noah. Well, it wasn’t Noah specifically, but any guy. Somehow, and damned if she knew how, Jake knew she was a virgin. Or rather, used to be one. A few years ago, he’d warned her away from another shifter in Catamount who’d briefly shown interest in her. At the time, Jake insisted the guy was only after her family connections. She hadn’t been interested enough to care, but in the midst of Jake’s warning, he’d let slip that he didn’t want her to lose her virginity to a jerk. Speechless, she’d merely turned a special shade of red and stammered her way out of the conversation. She suspected Phoebe had cued him in. Before he and Phoebe finally faced up to the fact that they were meant to be together, they’d been close friends for years. Though Phoebe was her friend as well, it wouldn’t have surprised her if Phoebe passed on her secret annoyance with her virginity.
When Noah walked into Jake’s office, it was like a livewire crackled between them. Heat flooded her, and she’d tried like crazy to keep it together. The absolute last thing she needed was for Jake to pick up on something and call Noah out in front of Dane and Hank. Lily sighed and brushed her hair away from her face. The line inched forward. They were in the longest, coldest part of Maine winter now, which meant the local hangouts tended to fill up with residents antsy from cabin fever.
The deli tables were filled. As she looked around, she felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around to find Phoebe behind her.
“Hey…” Her words were muffled when Phoebe tugged her into a quick hug.
“Hey yourself. I just said to Jake that I hadn’t seen you since we had dinner. How’s it going?”
Lily shrugged. “Pretty good.”
Phoebe waited expectantly, making her wonder what Phoebe knew. When Lily didn’t say anymore, Phoebe’s eyes narrowed. Conveniently, Lily was next up to order.
“It’s my lucky day! You’re both here at the same time.” Roxanne’s wide smile encompassed her and Phoebe before she focused on Lily. “What’ll it be? Coffee, food, or something else?”
“I’m on a coffee run for Jake. He’s meeting with Dane, Hank, and Noah…” Lily’s words ran out when she saw Roxanne’s grin widen. The last thing she needed was Roxanne cueing Phoebe in on her and Noah. Flushing like mad, Lily tried not to blush though she knew that was impossible. She didn’t know if Roxanne would have enough sense to know she wasn’t ready for the Phoebe to know about her and Noah yet. Not that she wanted to hide it from Phoebe, in fact she could use some advice, but if Phoebe knew, that meant Jake would know soon.
Roxanne chuckled and shook her head when she saw Lily’s face. Lily sighed with relief inside when it appeared Roxanne was going to leave it be. Unfortunately, Phoebe was more observant than Lily would have liked and glanced between them.
“Okay, what’s up?” Phoebe asked, her eyes swinging to Lily. “You were a little off the other night. I couldn’t put my finger on it, and you’re so damn private I didn’t want to push you. Jake mentioned he thought something was up with you too. Spit it out. I won’t go running to Jake if that’s what you’re worried about.”
Lily looked between Roxanne and Phoebe. Roxanne shrugged apologetically. Phoebe’s dark eyes were warm and concerned. Phoebe was one of the friends Lily usually turned to for advice and support, and she could seriously use both right about now. It wasn’t that Lily didn’t trust her not to tell Jake, but she knew how observant her brother was. Lily sighed. For better or worse, she needed to get this thing with Noah out in the open and somehow find a way to not be half-crazy with lust over him all the time. Not to mention finding a way to talk some sense into her heart. If her heart had its way, she and Noah were meant to be. That’s what you get for avoiding relationships for so long. The first guy you have sex with has you convinced he’s the one and only. How would you even know better? Because what I have with Noah is so much more… Her mind debated with itself. She was so out of her depth with Noah. Her limited experience with relationships in general wasn’t the least helpful with the fact that she’d stumbled into the most earth-shattering, mind-blowing sex she could have ever imagined with a man who made her heart and body clench with the depth of her hopes and dreams.
She took a breath and met Phoebe’s eyes again. “Can we get some coffee first?”
Phoebe grinned. Roxanne quickly took her order. When Phoebe stepped into the restroom, Roxanne turned back to Lily. “You can only keep a secret for so long around here. I didn’t mean to give anything away, but maybe it’s for the best.”
Lily shrugged. “I wouldn’t be worried if I could make sense of this thing with Noah.”
Roxanne’s eyes were warm. “You’re overthinking it.” She turned away to adjust the espresso machine knobs and quickly finished getting the coffee order ready.
Lily snagged a table and sipped her coffee while she waited for Phoebe. Moments later, Phoebe sat down and looked expectantly at Lily.
Lily traced the edge of the lid on her coffee. The mere thought of talking about Noah kicked her pulse up a notch. “Well, the thing is…I’ve been seeing Noah.” She paused and glanced over at Phoebe. Phoebe’s eyes widened slightly, but she remained quiet.
“It’s, um, kind of a lot. It happened fast, but I really like him and now I don’t know what to do. I don’t want Jake to get all protective and stuff, so it’s not like I’m trying to hide it, it’s just I don’t know. Ugh.” She rested her forehead in her palms for a moment before looking up. Phoebe’s eyes were warm and soft.
“I think I’m in over my head here.”
Phoebe’s smile was slow in coming, but her glee was evident. “This is perfect! I wondered how long it would take you to get over yourself and give someone, anyone, a chance. Noah’s seems like a great guy. Jake has nothing but good things to say about him lately. When did you start seeing him?”
Lily’s face was so hot, she was surprised she didn’t melt from embarrassment. “Just a few weeks ago,” she mumbled. “I don’t know what Noah thinks, but…”
Roxanne happened by their table right then and interjected. “If you’re wondering what Noah thinks, he’s in love with you.”
Lily’s head whipped up. Her heart clenched and hope crashed through her. Please, please let that be true. “How do you know?”
Roxanne grinned. “Because when I gave him a little lecture about how he’d better be good to you, that’s what he said. I told you, you’re overthinking this.” Roxanne swung her gaze to Phoebe. “Noah’s in here almost every day, so I’ve gotten to know him since he’s been back in Catamount. He’s head over heels for Lily. If you ask me, they’re perfect for each other. Noah’s just as private as Lily is and he’s a total sweetheart. I mean, the guy came home to take care of his mother because she has cancer. Then there’s the fact that’s he’s totally easy on the eyes and with a body to die for. Not like I have a thing for him, but you do,” she said, meeting Lily’s eyes with a mischievous grin.
Lily’s figured her face might as well have been painted bright red at this point while her heart threatened to pound its way out of her chest. Noah told Roxanne he loved her? She was almost afraid to believe it. She wanted to run back to Jake’s office and drag Noah outside to hear him say it himself.
“Well, if I was wondering how you felt
about him, I’m not anymore,” Phoebe said wryly.
Lily swung her eyes back to Phoebe, her face getting even hotter. “I…ugh. I’m terrible at this. I don’t know. Half the time I think I’m crazy, and the other half—I can’t stop thinking about him.” She nervously twirled her hair around her finger and took a gulp of coffee, savoring the heat of it.
Someone called Roxanne’s name. She turned to holler she’d be right over and turned back to Lily. “Just like I said, you’re overthinking it.” She caught Phoebe’s gaze. “Tell her. You did the same damn thing over Jake for years.” At that, Roxanne leaned down and tugged Lily into a swift hug before striding away, filling coffees as she moved through the deli.
Phoebe waited a beat before speaking. “Since this is the first I’ve heard of it, I can’t say I know a whole lot about what’s going on between you two, but I know the look I saw on your face. It perfectly captured how I felt about Jake before we finally sorted things out. I don’t know Noah too well myself, but Roxanne’s judgment is rock solid. If she thinks he’s a good guy, he is.” Phoebe paused, her eyes assessing. “I don’t mean to be too nosy, but does Noah know you’re…”
Lily put her face in her hands. “Oh. My. God. You’re seriously gonna go there? I can’t believe I ever told you that. I know you’re the one who told Jake too, which is half the reason I’m worried about how he’s going to react.” She dropped her hands and eyed Phoebe. “Yes, Noah knows I was a virgin. That’s not an issue.”
Phoebe had the grace to look chagrined. “I didn’t mean to make it sound like it was a problem, but you were kind of stressing about it. As for Jake, it slipped out one time when we were talking. I wish like hell it hadn’t because you’re right. He’s pretty damn protective when it comes to you.” Her moment of chagrin passed when her eyes widened. “Wait a minute? Did I hear you right?”
Lily sighed. “Yes. I said ‘was.’ Not that I still am.”
A slow grin spread across Phoebe’s face. “Well, well. Noah was the magic charm, huh?”
The blush that wouldn’t quit kept getting hotter. Lily didn’t bother to reply and only shrugged.
Phoebe chuckled. “Fine then. Well, as worried as you were about it, I’m happy that’s all taken care of now. Not that you’re asking me, but I think the sooner you tell Jake about Noah, the better. Let him know how you feel and tell him to back off.”
Lily sighed, her tension easing slightly. Phoebe had a point. “I’m with you there. Honestly, it’d be easier if I wasn’t so insane over Noah. I wish I had more experience with men. I can’t stop thinking about him. But how do I know it’s as good as I think it is?”
Phoebe rolled her eyes and sighed. “Maybe I dated a little more than you did, but honestly, you don’t know something’s good until you have it. The way you look when you talk about him tells me it’s good. It sounds like he feels the same way, so I’m with Roxanne on this one. Stop overthinking it.”
Lily took a breath and nodded slowly. She wished she could reconcile her mixed feelings about being a shifter with everything. Somehow, falling for Noah the way she was rubbed against her anxiety about it. She worried she was letting her emotions run the show. She’d seen shifter relationships blow up in spectacular fashion. As deeply as she felt for Noah, it would be devastating if that happened. “Easier said than done, but I’ll try. I think I’ll talk to Jake about it this afternoon. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
Chapter 11
Noah stood with his back to the door, straining to stay calm. Jake paced in front of him, his hand slashing through the air with every word.
“Did you think you could hide this from me? She’s my sister! The second I saw you look at her when she asked you what kind of coffee you wanted, I knew.”
Jake stopped in front of him and whirled to face him. “Tell me now how long this has been going on and what the hell your intentions are?” Jake was vibrating with anger.
Noah didn’t think it would be particularly helpful if he was too direct about how he felt—Lily turned him inside out, his body needed her as much as it needed air. He’d do anything for her. No, he thought perhaps that wasn’t how he should word his feelings when it came to Jake. He heard footsteps coming up the path to the door and then the door pushed against his back. He stepped out of the way. Hank and Dane had left a few minutes ago. Lily came through the door carrying a holder with coffees for all of them, including the now departed Hank and Dane. Her eyes bounced between them. She took a deep breath and set the coffees on Jake’s desk before turning to him.
“What the hell is going on?” she demanded.
Jake glared at her. “Were you planning to mention whatever the hell is going on between you and Noah here?” he asked, pointing at Noah, his eyes hard and cold.
Lily’s cheeks flushed, but she didn’t back down. “In what world do I have to report to my big brother when I get involved with someone?”
Jake swore and rolled his eyes. “You’re my only sister. I get to be protective. Plus, why do you need to hide anything?”
Lily threw her hands up. “Because I was afraid you’d act like this.” She turned to Noah. “Did he threaten you?”
Noah shook his head, figuring the less he said, the better.
She swung back to Jake, her hands on her hips and her eyes flashing. “I’m twenty-eight years old, Jake. Just like you can go about your business with Phoebe without giving me and everyone else a blow by blow, so can I. I meant to talk to you about Noah soon anyway. Don’t be an ass. He means a lot to me. Don’t you dare blame him for not saying anything to you because that’s my call, not his.”
Noah’s chest was tight. Hearing Lily’s quick defense of him and declaration that he meant a lot to her nearly choked him up. It was entirely unnecessary for her to step in to protect him from Jake’s wrath. He figured Jake was pissed not because he thought he had the right to say who could or couldn’t be with his sister, but because he cared about his sister and wanted to make sure she was with someone good enough for her. Noah could only hope he was—because every day that passed made it more and more difficult to imagine life without her.
He squared his shoulders and cleared his throat. “I get why you’d be concerned about me. Seems like you want to make sure Lily’s with someone good enough for her. I can’t say if I am, but I love her and I’d do anything for her.” His words came out rough, but he kept his gaze on Jake. His heart pounded because he didn’t quite know if Lily felt for him what he felt for her. His instincts told him she did, but instinct could be weak against the vagaries of mind and emotions. But he wasn’t going to hide behind his fear with Jake.
Jake met Noah’s eyes. The anger in his expression eased, if only slightly. The silence was heavy as Jake considered him. Jake’s gaze traveled back to Lily, a question in his eyes. Noah couldn’t see Lily’s face, but whatever Jake saw there caused him to nod firmly. He turned back to Noah. “You love her, huh?”
Noah nodded. This was definitely not the way he’d have chosen to tell Lily how he felt, but he wasn’t going to shy away. Jake remained silent for another beat before swinging away to lean against his desk.
“Don’t suppose I need to say this, but if you hurt her…”
Lily stepped in front of Jake and lightly pushed against his chest. “Oh my God! Is that necessary? What if I’m the one that hurts Noah? It’s so ridiculous for you to be all tough like this.”
Jake’s expression softened as he chuckled. “You’re not going to hurt Noah. You have a heart of gold. If he didn’t mean a lot to you, you wouldn’t be standing here getting in the middle of this. You can act like it’s because I’m your brother, and maybe it is, but any of your friends would kick his ass if he hurt you. Phoebe would be first in line.”
Lily threw her hands up and snatched her coffee out of the holder. “Whatever.” She swung around to face Noah. His heart tightened, his breath became shallow, and lust surged through his veins. Lily was like a direct line drug to his hea
rt and body. All of it was mixed together—love, lust, and everything else that was Lily.
She took a swallow of coffee, her blue eyes on him. “Are you done here?”
Noah managed to nod. Relieved as he was that the cat was out of the bag, so to speak, he still didn’t want to get a hard on in front of Jake. He forced himself to look away from Lily to Jake. “I’ll touch base after I visit Theo and see if he’ll talk.”
At Jake’s nod, he paused and gathered himself. “Look, I hope you know I wasn’t trying to be sleazy and pull one over on you about Lily. I know she means a lot to you. Things just…happened. I wanted it to be her choice to talk to you about it, but it is what it is.”
Jake looked between them, a rueful smile passing over his face. “I get it. Hope you understand where I was coming from.”
The respect Noah had for Jake only increased as a result of Jake’s protectiveness of Lily. Noah nodded and turned away. Lily snagged his coffee and handed it to him. “You might as well get your coffee before its cold.”
***
Lily stood by the windows in her living room, looking out into the snowy trees behind the house. After Noah’s declaration to Jake, she’d had this idea she would tell him how she felt. Instead, she’d walked outside and promptly freaked out, all but running to her car and telling him she’d see him later. He’d looked as perplexed as she felt. After she got home, she worked for a few hours, burying herself in mind-numbing, tedious coding fixes.
It was late afternoon now with the sun beginning its slow bow. It was sliding down behind the trees, lavender and pink streaking the sky in its wake. A cardinal landed on a tree branch nearby, a flash of color in the fading light. Lily’s phone dinged. Pulling it out of her pocket, a text from Noah blinked at her.