Starting Fires

by Makenzie Smith

  On my turn, Candace and Mia returned, and they asked to play the next game. I totally sucked and swatted air on my first try. Lacy laughed obnoxiously, so I aimed for her on my next attempt. I hit the ball with aggression and it went buzzing straight for her. She wasn’t expecting it and was hit in the face. Hard. For a beach ball. It was a good thing we weren’t playing with the real deal. Clear that she was fine, everyone enjoyed a good laugh at her expense.

  Throughout the game, Lucas went out of his way to touch me under the water. And after a while, so did I. It felt like were doing something mischievous and I loved it. We were all having so much fun, laughing and joking, that I didn’t even realize the game was almost over until Lucas said, “This one’s for the win,” behind me.

  “What’s the score?” I asked over my shoulder.

  “24 serving 21. Keep up, Marzy,” he said with seriousness before smiling at me.

  “We can do it,” I grinned back at him. He spun the ball in his hands and our eyes lingered on each other. I honestly didn’t want to stop playing.

  As he hit the ball over the net, I turned back around. There were several good volleys before it came right to Lucas. He hit it all wonky, and it went high, heading off my side of the pool. Since he couldn’t hit it again, I scrambled to get under it, but in my excitement was struggling through the water. I’d never make it to the edge to knock it back in time.

  Lucas grabbed me around the waist and pushed me into the air, then moved his arms around my thighs to push me up higher. I propped one arm on his shoulder and reached over the side of the pool as it was coming down.

  “Get it, baby,” he said with excitement.

  My heart jumped at his choice of words. I started swatting at the air and heard him laugh at my flailing. Behind me, I heard Wally say, “Hit that shit!” And Charles, “Get it get it get it!” I was able to make contact and we all turned to see where it would go.

  It flew over the net and off to a corner nobody was guarding. As it hit the water, we started cheering. I was clenching my fist in victory and celebrating as my body slid down Lucas’. Joyously, he hugged my back to his front and kissed the top of the head. I wrapped my arms around his at my waist and couldn’t stop my huge smile. It was just a volleyball game, but in this moment, it felt like an enormous victory. Nicole and Lacey were swatting at the water and blaming each other for the loss. Wally came over and extracted me from Lucas. He whirled me around in the water and started chanting, “MVP,” over and over.

  “We want to play, now,” Candace said from the edge of the pool, effectively ending our celebrating. During the entire game, I’d forgotten she was even there. It brought my excitement down a notch. “It’s uneven numbers,” she continued. “Someone needs to sit out.” She looked right at me as she said it and I cleared my throat.

  Instead of making it a big deal, I looked around at everyone. “I think I’ll end on a high note and retire,” I said with a smile, climbing out of the pool. Just as I stood on the concrete, Lucas told Mia that she was taking my spot. Candace walked to the shallows and angrily got into the pool. While I dried off, I decided to sit in one of the long lounge chairs. Nicole’s bag was sitting next to it, her iPod resting on the top. I held it up in the air asking her if I could use it. She nodded, then made an annoyed face about Candace playing with them. I shook her sunglasses at her, too. She gave me a thumbs up. Not wanting to hear anything Candace said or did while they played, I put on her sunglasses and made sure my head and neck were dry as I put her ear buds in to start her shuffle.

  At some point, I dozed off and was shaken awake by Charles. Taking off her sunglasses, I realized it was dusk, and only the two of us outside. “Ready to come in or you wanna sleep out here all night?” he asked, reaching a hand down to me.

  I grabbed it and pulled myself up. “Did everyone leave?”

  “Inside,” he jerked a thumb in that direction. He started gathering up items that had been strewn across the yard while I put my shorts and tank back on. I realized that I really, really had to pee and wanted to change clothes, so I made my way inside and up the stairs. As I passed Wally’s bedroom, I saw Lucas standing just inside the doorway with his back to me. Wally was sitting on the bed, and we made eye contact as I passed. As I reached my bedroom door, I heard him ask Lucas, “So, what do you think about Marlowe?” and froze.

  Lucas didn’t reply, but then Wally laughed and said, “I know, dude.” I wanted to know what Lucas had done. Did he make a good face or a bad one? Did he do something vulgar? I crept into my room and slowly pushed my door, nearly to closing, so I could still eavesdrop on their conversation.

  “She’s fucking perfect, man,” Lucas said. I gripped the edge of the door and leaned into it, as if that would help me hear them better. “But Candace-”

  “But Candace what?” Wally groaned, cutting him off. “You don’t wanna be with her, just move on already.”

  “I’m trying! She randomly shows up every time I try to break ties with her. Causes these huge scenes. Our lives are so integrated I can’t just cut her out. She always finds some way to sneak her way back in.”

  “Look,” I heard Wally’s bed squeak as he moved, “you’re gonna have to put your foot down. This is exhausting. You don’t want her that way. If you have to be mean for her understand that, then be mean. It’s time to move on from this shit fest.”

  “Yeah…” Lucas agreed. They were quiet for a little while before he spoke again. “But even if I do finally cut her out and she leaves me be, I’m not looking for any type of relationship. I keep thinking I want to, but then something happens that makes me change my mind.”

  “I’m not saying you need to get in one,” Wally said, the bed squeaking again, and I imagined him falling back on it, folding his arms behind his head. “Marlowe just wants to have fun and be casual. I think you need that, especially after all the shit you’ve been dealing with the last few years. Don’t let Candace ruin it.”

  Lucas didn’t reply. Feeling guilty about listening to them, I decided to leave the door and go to the bathroom. After finishing, I looked in the mirror and noticed that my makeup was smeared under my eyes. Grabbing a face cloth I tried to get rid of it while I thought about what Lucas and Wally had said. I was glad I knew what was going on with Candace and I didn’t have to feel bad about physically wanting him. And he didn’t sound like he wanted a relationship either. Maybe it could be as Lacey suggested—just hanging out, none of the messy stuff. I shrugged at myself in the mirror. Whatever happened, happened. Worrying about it served no purpose.

  Lucas and Wally weren’t in his room when I walked past, and as I reached the bottom of the stairs, I realized I hadn’t changed. I was about to go back up when Mia called my name.

  “Come here,” she said and waved me over to the kitchen. Charles, Lucas, Candace, and Mia were the only ones in there. Everyone else had piled into the living room. I stopped at the kitchen island and stood in front of her. “Are you dating anyone?” she asked and I bristled. I hated that question. It was usually followed by a very uncomfortable conversation.

  A bag of peanut M&M’s was sitting on the counter. I reached in and popped one in my mouth before telling her ‘no’.

  “Good,” she said. “I know a great guy who’s also single.” She sang that last word and I grinned, despite myself.

  Pushing up on the counter behind me, I said, “Not interested.”

  She smacked her hand down. “Why not? He’s really funny, and super cute. Also he has a great job.”

  Candace was watching me hopefully, probably praying that I would say yes, while Lucas was pretending not to watch me. I rolled my tongue around in my mouth. “Pass,” I finally said.

  She huffed and was about to try pleading her case again, when Charles broke in. “Save your breath. Marlowe here isn’t dating. Taking a hiatus or some shit.”

  “Hiatus or some shit,” I said back to him in a mocking voice, not liking that he was making fun of me. He playfully pursed his lips
at me.

  “Jeez, what is there like a club of you or something?” She threw her thumb at Lucas. “He doesn’t date either.” Candace’s body went ramrod straight and she looked down at her fingers. “Here’s an idea, maybe the two of you can ‘not date’ each other,” she said sarcastically.

  I cut my eyes to Lucas. He picked a peanut M&M out of his hands, and brought it to his mouth, the candy resting between his forefinger and thumb. He smiled as his tongue took it, simultaneously winking at me. Grinning, I shook my head and jumped off the counter about to walk into the living room.

  In my peripheral, I saw Candace storming over to me. Was she about to hit me? Were we about to get into a verbal argument? I took a breath and turned to face her, ready to take whatever she was going to dish out.

  She stopped in front of me, her eyes blazing. She pushed some of her hair behind her ear, and I noticed that she had long nails. Note to self: stay clear of the nails. My stomach was turning over. I didn’t want to do this, but I wasn’t going to run and hide from her either. If she hit me or yelled at me, I suppose I could take it.

  At first I thought she was going to walk off, but then through clenched teeth, she said, “I will end your fat ass.”

  If she would have just said, ‘I will end your ass’ or even ‘I will end you, bitch’, I’m sure my reaction would have been different, but adding the “fat” onto it was completely unnecessary. I felt pathetic because I couldn’t think of anything to say back, so I just stood there looking at her, mouth agape.

  “Please. You wish you had her ass,” Nicole said. I looked over and saw that she was now standing next to me, Lacey on the other side.

  “Candace!” Lucas said sternly. “You need to leave.”

  She grabbed her purse off the counter and marched out of the house. Mia blew out a breath of air. “Sorry, Marlowe. That was my fault.” She turned towards her brother. “You should talk to her before we go. That was ridiculous.” Lucas ran a hand through his hair in frustration, but nodded his head and went after her.

  Ignoring everyone, I went into the living room and sat on the couch with my back to the arm, my legs stretched out in front of me. Ian and Wally were oblivious to the whole ordeal, focused intently on the video game in front of them. I watched as they ran around buildings and shot at people. A few minutes later Charles came in and kissed me on the top of my head. “Don’t let her get to you. Bitch be crazy,” he whispered softly.

  Bitch be crazy had never been spoken with more heartfelt sincerity. I chuckled and nodded at him. He took a seat in the empty recliner and asked to play the next game.

  While I watched them, I thought about everything. I liked Lucas, but I barely knew him. Though, I wanted to get to know him. Physically, he was everything I could ever want. Being around him gave me butterflies. We were both in a similar situation, wanting to move on with our lives, but not quite ready to jump into a relationship. I think he would understand my desire to keep things simple and casual. It had been seven months since I’d dated, and I was fine with being single, but it would be nice to have someone around. He was like a stepping-stone to repairing my battered and bruised heart.

  I’d be using him, but he’d be using me, too. We’d be each other’s means to an end. If it worked. If it didn’t I could just walk away. There would be no break up, no need to have long discussions about where things went wrong or how we could fix it. As long as I didn’t have to deal with Candace being in my face all the time, I was fine with that. Maybe he was outside having the talk with her right now—completely ending it as Wally suggested.

  Two arms grabbed me around the waist and lifted me up, breaking my thoughts. A body came under me and placed me back down into their lap. Lucas placed a hand on my leg and the other on the side of my neck. He brought my ear to his mouth. “Your ass is perfect,” he whispered.

  “Thank you,” I smiled and nestled into him, forgetting everything else. He draped his arm along the couch and I rested my head onto his shoulder, breathing in his scent—which currently had a hint of chlorine, but it reminded me of our volleyball game. After a few minutes, Nicole brought me my phone and told me that it kept dinging and that they were leaving. She gave me a cheeky smile as she eyed Lucas’ hand idly rubbing my leg while he watched the TV. I told them bye and checked my phone. The messages were from Juanita. I didn’t have her number in my phone, but I knew it was her because it said.

  Hey, this is Juanita.

  Next message:

  Just wanted to let you know that yourdad and I are gonig to be going out of town durign Thaknsgivng.

  Next message:

  Srry, we couldn’t get together like we talked about. Mabye for Chrstmas?Talk to you ssoon.-Jaunita.

  Ugh. She couldn’t even spell her own name right. And they were already making plans for Thanksgiving? It wasn’t even October. My fingers lingered over the keys, trying to decide if I wanted to reply. I wasn’t even planning to go to see them on Thanksgiving, and after what I’d said to her, I was surprised she approached me at all.

  Eventually, I settled with K and put my phone back in my lap. Lucas reached down and picked it up. Without saying anything, he unlocked it and went to my contact list, adding his name and number. Rubbing my back, he called himself, waited until his own phone started vibrating in his pocket, and then placed it back where I had it.

  Lucas didn’t ask for my number, he straight up took it. My body starting shaking with silent laughter as I took one arm and wrapped it around his back, hugging him to me. Lucas squeezed my thigh, just below my ass, and told the guys he had next game.

  Charles died on the screen. “Man, Ian. What the hell?” he yelled, throwing the controller in our direction. It landed by my feet, and Lucas reached over to grab it.

  He sat up and leaned over my legs as he started playing. It sort of felt like I was in the way. “Do you need me to move?” I asked him.

  “Absolutely not,” he told me. Even though I was ignored, I liked sitting like this with him, so I was glad he didn’t want me to. After he died, he tossed the controller over to Wally. I noticed that Ian was the only one who never passed his controller and figured out that he was the reigning champion. Everyone else was trying to dethrone him.

  After watching them play for a while, I felt my eyelids start to droop, and told them that I was going to bed. I went up the stairs alone and walked into my room alone. I stood in front of my nightstand and stretched high into the sky.

  “Hey,” I heard over my shoulder. It was Lucas. As I turned towards him, he stepped in and shut the door. “I’m sorry about today,” he said.

  I sat down on the edge of my bed. “What specifically?” I asked, needing to know what I was supposed to be forgiving him for.

  “Candace. I talked to her. I never intended to drag you through all of my mess.”

  “You didn’t invite her over here,” I said. “But thanks for the apology.”

  He sat down next to me and let out an exasperated sigh. “I just want you to know that I’m not trying to hide a girlfriend away somewhere. I mean she wasn’t my girlfriend back when you thought she was. And it’s definitely not what you think with Kate. At all.” He cut his hand forcefully, like that would never happen in a million years.

  I refrained from asking why she’d been at his house—even though I wanted to. If I wasn’t looking for commitment, I didn’t have a right to know. “Okay,” I said.

  “We good?” he asked, and I nodded. “Then come here.”

  He reached for me and pulled me into his lap. My bed was low enough that his feet were on the floor. Mine were wrapped around his waist, resting against the bed. There was no drawn out waiting for our lips to touch. As soon as I settled, I cradled his face and brought my mouth down to his. His hands slid up my waist and back as our lips moved. I ran my hands into his hair and turned his head, softly pushing my tongue into his mouth. He pulled my hips into his and I sighed.

  His fingers grazed my stomach, and they went higher and higher unt
il they ghosted over my breast. With the thin fabric of my bikini, I could almost imagine that he was touching it skin to skin, and then he pushed the top aside and palmed it in his hand, gently squeezing. I shuddered and rolled my hips, feeling him easily through his swim trunks. His other hand went to my ass and every time he put pressure on it, his fingers nearly touched me between my legs.

  Abruptly, he stood with my legs still around him and pushed me into the closed bathroom door. The jarring sensation pulled our mouths apart, and in the dim light of my desk lamp, I saw that he was trying to control himself. He was asking me if I wanted this to go further. I wasn’t sure. What would happen tomorrow? Would we be just a one-night stand? Or a regular thing? I’d never had a one-night stand, and wasn’t necessarily eager to add that to my belt. I needed more time to process all of this.

  I lowered my legs at the same time he brought his mouth back to mine, this time kissing me slower. More mouth than tongue. Once our breath evened out a bit, he gruffly said, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” then stepped away from me and walked through my door. I stood there for a moment after he’d gone, letting my pulse return to normal. After I took a shower, I got into bed and tried to drift off to sleep. My phone vibrated with a new text message, and I pulled it off my nightstand.

  It was from Lucas.

  Night Marzy, was all it said, but I still smiled from ear to ear.

  Night Lucas, I replied and snuggled into my pillow.

  Chapter 10

  Lucas didn’t call me the next day, or even send a text. I wondered why he hadn’t, but didn’t dwell on it, busying myself with homework instead.

  The following afternoon, I realized that our refrigerator was bare, and I went grocery shopping. It would be a nice surprise for my roommates. Charles was busy at work, and barely had time to do anything else. I had no idea where Wally ventured off to all day. I knew he worked at a video game store, but only part time. Where he was the rest of the day, who knew? I didn’t even think he owned a car.