Back to Life

by Mellie George

  Slamming the shot glass down hard on the table, she glared at Brody. “I’ll slow down when I’m dead,” she said, looking at him in the eye. He looked angry for a moment, and Marissa looked worried. It suddenly got a little too quiet.

  “Hey, are you okay?” I asked, placing my hand on hers.

  She quickly snatched her hand away and her eyes quickly shot to mine, fire burning in them. “I’m fine. Never better,” she said. She looked away and began to pour herself another shot, but Marissa stopped her.

  “Rory, come with me. Now,” Marissa said sternly. She seemed like the type that was sweet and calm but could be tough when she needed to be.

  Rory sighed and sarcastically said, “Yes mom,” and stumbled behind her to the bathroom. Either those shots must have gone to her pretty quick or she’d been drinking before I showed up.

  I turned to Brody. “What the hell was that about?”

  “She’s pissed at me. Knowing her, she probably thinks I brought you here to set her up.”

  I felt a little stab of disappointment. “Why would that piss her off?”

  Brody looked a little at war with himself for a moment. He looked toward the bathroom, and sighed. “Rory’s had some bad shit happen in her past. About four years ago, she had a boyfriend. He was a good guy, a lawyer.”

  “Really? Lawyers don’t seem like her type,” I said, surprised.

  “Well, this one was different. They were definitely different, but that’s what made them unique.”

  I poured myself a shot and quickly tossed it back. “So, what happened?”

  He sighed. “She’d kill me if I told you this…” he trailed off. “She doesn’t like to talk about it. At all.”

  “Well, then don’t tell me. I don’t want her to hate me. I like her. Let her tell me on her own.”

  “What if she doesn’t want to do that?”

  “Then she just won’t.” In all actuality, I was intrigued. This guy must have done a number on her for her to swear off men altogether. I really wanted to know more, but honestly, even though I was a cop that carried a gun, I had a feeling that if I pried into her romantic history all I’d get was a hard kick in the balls. The thought made me smile to myself. “I can be her friend and not know everything about her. She can tell me what she wants to tell me.”

  He smiled at me. “Dude, where the fuck did Liam go? Why are you all sensitive and understanding now? As much as I love you, man, you were kind of a dick to girls in college,” he admitted.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I know I was. I’m just growing up, I guess. And, while we’re at it, let me ask you a question. Why the hell don’t you go for it with Marissa already?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You’re kidding, right? That girl is so into you it’s ridiculous. Hell, I’ve only met her once and I can see it. Why can’t you pull your shit together and go after her? Because if you don’t, I might just go for it,” I said, teasingly.

  He narrowed his eyes at me. Jealous rage was boiling under the surface in them. “You wouldn’t dare.”

  “You’re right, I wouldn’t. But the fact that you looked like you were going to kill me just now means you have feelings for her too. So, come on, what gives?”

  He rolled his eyes and sighed. “It’s because I don’t want to fuck things up, all right?” I just blinked at him and stared. “Look, that girl is important to me. She’s been my best friend since high school, and I love her to death. Believe me, I’ve thought about it, especially since I came to the city. I actually can’t stop thinking about it. I just don’t want to start something with her knowing it might end badly because if it does, I’ll lose her and it would put Rory in a bad position having to choose either her best friend or her brother.”

  “I get it. You don’t want to risk losing a friendship. However,” I paused, “it might turn out to be the greatest thing that’s ever happened to you.”

  “Okay, who invited Dr. Phil?” he joked.

  “I’m serious, man. Just think about it. She’s a great girl, and she’s right there waiting for you. All you have to do is go for it,” I said. I wish I had Brody’s romance problems right now. A beautiful girl I was into that had the hots for me too? I was dreaming, well wet dreaming, every night about the most smoking hot woman I’d ever met that didn’t want to give me the time of day all because of a bad breakup. I had my work cut out for me. But, no woman had ever made me feel this way, and even though it was going to be hard work, I could tell she was definitely worth it.

  Chapter 5

  Rory

  “Rory, what the hell is wrong with you?” Marissa snapped. “You were being really rude out there.”

  “Me? Don’t you think it was rude for Liam to happen to show up here the first night I went out since we were at Shadow? I know either you or Brody tried setting me up with him!”

  “No, Rory, we didn’t. Brody knew he might show up here, but we didn’t think you’d actually come with us because you’ve been a total asshole for three weeks! Besides, I don’t see what the big deal is. You two seemed to hit it off that night. I thought you could at least be friends," she said.

  I saw the fear in her eyes, and I immediately softened. I knew she was telling the truth. She of all people would know not to set me up with anyone, especially Liam. She didn’t know that I had been having unwelcomed fantasies about him for almost three weeks. I would be lying in bed, trying to fall asleep, and just as I was about to drift off, his face would flash into my mind, leading to some very potent, sexual dreams. It was bothering me to no end, and I was feeling so guilty. “I’m sorry, Marissa. He is a nice guy, I’ll admit that. I just…”

  She pulled me into a hug. “I know,” she said, smoothing my hair with her hand.

  “I just still miss him.”

  “I know you do. Please don’t be mad at me for saying this, but he’s not coming back, Rory. Stopping your life won’t change anything.”

  I felt a pang in my chest, and I thought I was going to start crying. I took a deep breath and stowed my emotions away. “I know,” I whispered. “I just don’t know if I’m ready for anything again. I’ve lost so much. I don’t know if I will ever be ready.”

  She pulled away and looked at me, eye to eye. “Rory, there’s only one way to find out. He seems to like you, and you know if Mason were here he would be kicking your ass right now if you didn’t take a chance to make yourself happy.” Marissa said.

  “I don’t know if Liam can handle what happened,” I admitted.

  “Rory, he’s a cop. He’s seen the worst of the worst. I’m sure he can handle anything.”

  “I’m afraid he’ll look at me like I’m damaged goods.”

  “Rory, you are nothing like that. You are an amazing woman and if you let him in and to the core of you, I bet he’ll be the best thing to ever happen to you.”

  I sighed nervously. “All I can promise is to try, okay? I’ll try being nice, but I can’t shake this guilt I have. I lost more than just Mason, you know,” I said.

  “I know. But I think if you let Liam in, you can finally begin to move past it and heal. He might help you be the old Rory again. So, what do you say? Are you ready to go back out there?” she asked, holding her arm out.

  “Okay. Let’s do it,” I said, and I followed her out the bathroom door. When we came back out, there were two women sitting in our seats at the table. God, I can’t even leave for five minutes without bar skanks pawing all over the guys! Marissa looked down at her shoes, frustration and hurt in her eyes. I grabbed her arm. “I’ll get rid of them, just go along with me, okay?”

  She nodded and we walked to the table. Liam’s face broke into a grin when he saw me, but his face turned into surprise when I nudged past the skanky brunette that was coming onto him and snaked my arm around his waist. Before I could think, I leaned into him and kissed his scruffy cheek. “Hey, babe, sorry I took so long in there.”

  He tightened his arm around me and traced his fingers along the bare sk
in of my lower back. I felt goose bumps forming again. “It’s okay,” he said. Marissa stood by Brody timidly, not knowing if she should make a move or not. I nodded at her, but she stayed still.

  I shot my eyes at the woman. “Um, you’re in my seat.”

  “Doesn’t have your name on it,” the woman said, acidly.

  “Well, I’ll write my name on it in your blood if you and your skeazy friend don’t get the fuck away from my boyfriend right now.”

  The bitch rolled her eyes. “Please. He’s not your boyfriend. Why would he want trash like you when he could have treasure like me?”

  Liam gripped me tighter…probably because he knew I was about to rip this girls face off. “The only thing trashy here is you, believe me. I could smell the dumpster road whore smell wafting off you from across the bar,” I shot back.

  Keeping the show going, Liam leaned in and lightly brushed his lips across my neck, making my heart beat faster. “Good one, babe.”

  The skanky woman looked over at her friend, and then back to me. “Well, if he’s been sleeping with your tatted up ass I’m definitely not interested now. I’d probably get an STD.”

  “That I probably got from the toilet seat you used in the bathroom.” I looked over and saw her friend trying to touch Brody, and fire shot through me. Brody was always too nice of a guy to tell a woman no, but actions speak louder than words. I was about to tell her off too when he all of a sudden stood up and grabbed Marissa around her waist, pulling her close to him. She gasped audibly as he grabbed her face and pulled her into a hot steamy kiss. I had to play it cool so the women would leave, but internally I was dancing a jig at the sight of them kissing for the first time. I could hear Liam chuckle under his breath.

  Rolling her heavily made up eyes, the woman turned to her friend and said, “Let’s get the hell out of here,” and they walked away. I took a napkin from the table and wiped my chair before I sat back down.

  “Just wiping the herpes off the seat,” I said, and Liam laughed, releasing me. I sat down in the chair and grinned at him. “Sorry for being so forward. You both looked like you needed some help,” I said, thumbing over my shoulder at Brody.

  “Oh, I think Brody’s doing okay on his own,” he said, nodding his head in their direction. I looked at him and hadn’t even noticed that he and Marissa were still kissing. Making out hardcore was more like it. Liam tapped my arm, and pointed toward the door. “Why don’t we give them some privacy?” he asked, holding his hand out to me.

  Smiling widely, I said, “Okay,” and took his hand. His hands were warm and big; my whole hand fitting inside his perfectly. He helped me off my chair and I said, “Hey, you two, we’re going to wait outside. Come find us when you’re done sucking face.” All I heard was a moan from Brody as we walked outside the bar. “So, now that my brother and my friend have ditched me, what do I do now?” I asked.

  “Well, you can hang out with me. I won’t bite. Not unless you beg,” he joked.

  “That’s not likely, pal.” I laughed, and then sighed. “Hey, I’m sorry about being a bitch before.”

  “Oh you weren’t being a bitch. It’s okay.”

  “Yes I was. If you hadn’t seen it, it’s because Marissa knew it was coming and saved me from myself. It had nothing to do with you.”

  “So, why don’t you tell me then?” he asked.

  “Come on, you don’t want to hear about my problems on a Friday night.”

  “Actually, I do. I want to get to know you, Rory. Believe it or not, I actually like you. I think you’re awesome and I’d like to know you better. Tell me,” he prodded. He likes me? Suddenly, I felt like a teenager, blushing about ten different shades of red.

  I looked down and sighed. “I thought they were trying to set me up with you. I thought that’s why you were here.”

  “And it bothered you that they wanted to set you up with me? Why? Is that a bad thing?” he asked me softly.

  “No, not a bad thing. I just…I have a lot going on in here,” I said, pointing my index finger to my head. “Stuff I’m sure you don’t want to know about.”

  “I bet you’re wrong. Try me,” he said. I realized we’d stopped at a bench outside the club, and he motioned for me to sit.

  “You might not look at me the same way,” I admitted. I can’t believe I was thinking of telling something so personal and heartbreaking to a virtual stranger. I had never been more afraid in my life.

  He lifted my chin with his fingers, forcing me to look at him. “Nothing you could say to me would make me think any less of you, Rory.”

  I took a deep breath. Here goes nothing. “I wasn’t always like this, you know. This bitchy, frigid woman. I used to be fun,” I said.

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. I used to be happy. Four years ago, I had this boyfriend, and he was a lawyer. His name was Mason Callahan.”

  “You, with a lawyer? Really?” he smiled.

  “Yes,” I said, nudging him in the ribs. “He was amazing. Cute, funny, and smart as hell. He could match wits with just about anyone and if you disagreed with him on something, give him ten minutes and you would totally be on his side,” I laughed. “Now that I think about it, that’s probably how he got me to go out with him in the first place.”

  “He sounds pretty great. So, what happened?” he asked.

  My hands started shaking. I have never said any of this out loud. I think it was going to make it sink in…make it too final. Taking another deep breath, I continued. “Well, he was up for partner at his firm, and one of the partners he was trying to impress had him running around like a dog for her. He would get her coffee, pick up her dry cleaning, and he would even pick her drunken ass up at bars all the time instead of taking a cab. On the night of our one year anniversary, we were out celebrating because...” I paused, trying to swallow the huge lump in my throat, “because he’d just proposed to me.”

  Liam was quiet as the night. “Ah,” he said, and waited for me to continue.

  “It had been a fun night, and I was so happy that he asked me to marry him. He always said he wanted to be married and have a bunch of kids and get a nice house and a dog,” I snorted, smiling.

  “He wanted kids so soon?” Liam laughed.

  “Oh yes. Mason absolutely loved children.” I gulped again, and continued. “Well, anyway, we were out celebrating when he got a call from that fucking bitch boss of his to come pick her up again. He wanted to stay with me, but he also loved his job. He was having a tough time deciding, so I made the decision for him and told him to go. I wish every day I hadn’t…” I stopped, feeling tears stinging my eyes.

  “Hey,” Liam said, wrapping his arm around me. “Rory, you don’t have to say any more.”

  “I have to get this out,” I whispered. I’d held it in for so long, and I was never going to get past it by ignoring it. I felt like it was choking me. Marissa was right. I couldn’t change anything by pretending it never happened. “After he left, I decided to go home. I got my coat and was headed out the door, when I heard sirens going down the road and there was a crowd gathered about two blocks away. I usually wouldn’t get involved, but I was curious. I followed the sound of the siren and when I got there…I saw him.” I stopped. My bottom lip was quivering.

  “Rory?” Liam asked, still rubbing my arm.

  “It was Mason. He’d been mugged. Someone mugged him while he was running off to help that bitch. They shot him, Liam, and left him there to die. He bled to death on that street in front of my eyes because that woman threatened his job. I hate her, Liam, I hate her,” and I could hold the tears back no more. Fat, salty tears began to pour from my eyes.

  “Oh, Rory, I’m so sorry,” he said, and pulled me into a hug. We just sat there, me in his arms, and he held me while I cried. I cried four years worth of tears, and he held onto me for each one that fell.

  Once I was all dried up, I pulled away from him, and looked at his shirt. It was completely wet. “Oh, Liam, look at your shirt. You’re soak
ed,” I said, sniffing.

  “Hey, don’t even worry about it. It’s okay,” he said, and he took his hand and wiped one of my wet cheeks with his hand.

  Suddenly, I felt embarrassed. I wiped my other cheek and looked down. “Oh God, I must be a mess. I’m sorry to break down on you like that.”

  “You aren’t a mess, Rory. If anything, you are even more beautiful.”

  “I am?” I asked, puzzled.

  “Of course you are. You put up this tough front, but you showed that you can be vulnerable too. That’s a good thing. I just feel so terrible for you. What you’ve lost…I can’t believe you kept something like this bottled up all this time,” he said.

  “It was just too hard to face, so I locked it away.”

  “Did they ever catch the guy?”

  Sniffing, I said, “No.”

  “I’m sorry, Rory.” We sat in silence for a moment. “So, that’s what you were afraid to tell me?”

  I tensed up inside. Actually, it wasn’t. Mason’s death was only half of what I wanted to tell him, but he was being so sweet and caring that I couldn’t bring myself to say anymore. I was afraid the rest of the story would make him run from me and never look back, and I was beginning to like him. I nodded and lied, “Yes.”

  “Oh Rory, you shouldn’t be afraid to talk to me like this. I want you to tell me things because I like you. A lot.”

  I sniffed again. “You do?”

  He nodded. “Forgive me, and please don’t be mad, but there is something I have to do,” he said, and before I could speak or even think, he moved his mouth to mine and kissed my lips softly. It was just a quick, closed mouth kiss, but the feel of Liam’s lips on mine was like an electric volt and the kiss was like a current that ran straight through me. I felt like someone just turned on a switch inside me, shining a light in the darkness that had consumed me for so long. It was the sweetest and most terrifying kiss I’d ever had. At that point, I hadn’t kissed anyone in four years, and the thing that scared me the most was that it didn’t scare me. Liam’s lips on mine felt right. He pulled away, his eyes still closed. “Wow,” he whispered.