Dead Weight

by Casamassina, Matt

  He didn’t know California well and couldn’t really see much of it through the rain and blackness of night, but the details that did shine bright before they blurred by his vision suggested more desert. Flatlands, weeds and shrubs, rocks, and then darkness. For some stupid reason, he thought they might cross the border into blue oceans and sandy beaches and was imagining what they might look like when their high-beams lit up a huge barrier in the road.

  He pumped the brakes and the Flex’s rear-end drifted several feet before the tires caught the road again and the vehicle straightened out. With the car finally slowed, he focused on the impediment — the object so out of place that at first his mind refused to accept it.

  “What the hell?” Aurora asked and then cupped her mouth, strangling a gasp.

  “I see it,” Zephyr said.

  And he did. Someone had placed a portable basketball goal— the kind normally found curbside or in the backyards of neighbor’s houses—in the middle of the street. The full system. A thick base and brackets held the long steel pipe that raised upward to the backboard, rim and net. This was an odd thing to be discarded on a freeway, yes, but that wasn’t why Jordan screamed from her place in the backseat.

  “Don’t look at it, Jord! Close your eyes,” Aurora called back. “Zephyr, get us out of here.”

  Dangling by a thick rope from the rim of the court was a soaked corpse, blackened, bloated and badly decomposed. Two things were wrapped around the dead man’s neck, itself ripped, stretched, and threatening to tear away. The first was the rope which someone had used to hang him. The second was a big red sign that simply read, Welcome to California.

  34

  The Golden State

  Hours later, when they pulled off the highway into Palm Springs, the mood was as dead as the man who received them. None of them talked a lot about the body or after it. And even now, with so much death, some of it by his own hands, it was a shock to see a corpse like that. Not just the loss of life, but murder. And for what? Some sick joke? Some warped message?

  The rain had finally relented, at least. And the more they drove into the depths of California, the more lights they saw twinkling in the distance off either side of the highway. Somehow, electricity still burned and surged to these rickety settlements on the outskirts of nowhere.

  Aurora pointed into the night. “I didn’t realize how much I missed the city lights. You know?”

  “Me too,” Jordan added from the backseat. “And another thing. Maybe Disneyland still works, too.”

  “If Disneyland is still working, I promise you that we will go.”

  Hotel Red Leaf was modern, chic and pretentious. The kind of place people went to get away from reality for a few days. The kind of place whose inflated bill at the conclusion of the getaway brought reality back home. The reception lobby was awash in golden light from an assortment of featureless, square lamps and some brand of electronica played through unseen ceiling speakers. A huge fish tank was cemented into a cavity of a nearby opaque wall and a dozen or more large fish of various colors floated upside-down inside it. Of course, the reception desk was lifeless and when Zephyr scaled the counter to search for keys, he was not surprised to find a heap of uniforms and shoes sans their owners.

  The old luxuries of the hotel belied the dangers of the new world beyond its walls, and as they searched the lobby, they carried their guns. Aurora escorted Jordan to the bathroom while Zephyr scoured the reception office for instructions on how to use the place’s electric key system, and was amazed when he found a one-page tutorial that actually worked.

  The suite was on the far side of the hotel and on the way, they passed the outside pool, still alight and positively alluring, even in the cold weather. Thick steam rose from the water as it waited motionless for someone to enjoy a swim. Cabanas and lounge chairs surrounded the pool and a barbecue rested in one corner. The pool itself was of the infinity kind and a waterside bar welcomed swimmers at one end. It was fully stocked, which did not go unnoticed.

  “Yes, please,” Aurora said and Zephyr imagined her in a bikini. Come on, dude. Focus. Pay attention.

  The suite was a score. The place was gargantuan, luxurious, and altogether gorgeous. Vaulted ceilings and dark hardwood floors throughout. A stylish selection of modern furniture and art gave way to two expansive living spaces, three bedrooms, and french doors that opened poolside.

  “Wow,” Aurora said, after they’d completed their sweep of the place.

  “Yeah. This is even cooler than our house in Las Cruces,” Jordan seconded.

  “It might be bigger, too,” Aurora remarked.

  “No kidding,” Zephyr said, plopped into one of the sectionals, instinctively palmed the remote and turned on the television. It flickered into life with an electric hum and a brighter shade of black, but no signal greeted him.

  “OK, so what’s the plan then?” Aurora asked. “I’m hungry and I could use a hot bath, which reminds me, if we don’t have hot water, I’m gonna grab some shampoo and sit in the pool. And I kind of want to get drunk.” When Zephyr stared at her, she shrugged and added, “What? Sorry. It’s true. We’ve kind of had a shit night, dude.”

  Then she turned to Jordan. “You don’t care, right?”

  “No.”

  “See?”

  They all claimed their bedrooms. Naturally, Jordan wanted to sleep with Zephyr again and didn’t respond well to the prospect of her own room. However, when he assured her that his quarters were adjacent hers, she gave a little, and when he bribed her with the possibility of investigating Disneyland at their earliest convenience, she relented and allowed the separation. He felt guilty about it, but they couldn’t continue sleeping together forever, particularly if he and Aurora were going to—what? What would they be doing, exactly? His heart skipped a beat as he pondered the likelihood of going to bed with her. Not even sex. Just sleeping next to her. Curling up with her. He recognized for the dozenth time that she held so much power over him. Did she even know that? And did he hold the same power over her? He thought probably not.

  They were too exhausted to rummage for food, so they ate from their snack bags— a dinner of Doritos, peanuts, donuts and water—everything a growing body needed. When they were all finished, Aurora marched off to see if the water ran hot and returned minutes later beaming. She told them she planned to take a long, “scalding hot” bath and that, like before, they needn’t wait for her.

  “Can’t we go swimming instead?” Jordan nearly begged. “The pool water is hot.”

  Aurora shook her head. “We don’t have any swimsuits.” Then she looked at Zephyr with a raised eyebrow as she always did when presenting him a challenge.

  “Lemme guess,” he said. “You want me to find some.”

  He returned a half hour later with a bag full of swim shorts, bikinis and one-piece bathing suits in different sizes and colors. He started out with the plan to pillage some rooms for these items, but was relieved to learn that the hotel was home to its own clothing shop and once he finally unearthed a key to it, he also discovered a robust supply of options.

  “OK, mission accomplished,” he said and handed the bag over to the girls. “No idea what sizes you are so feel free to try some of these on. I grabbed everything I could find so something’s gotta fit.”

  Jordan dug through the bag first and then skipped into the bathroom with several bathing suits in her arms. When Aurora finally investigated the contents, she looked up at him, frowning.

  “How come only the bikinis are in my size?”

  “What? Oh, uhm, I don’t know.” He met her gaze and smiled. “I mean, I really couldn’t say.”

  “Uh-huh.” But she smiled back. “This is how it’s gonna be, is it?” She stretched a skimpy bikini bottom before him to accentuate her point. “And I suppose you found a thong for yourself?”

  “Sadly, none in my size.”

  “I guess they don’t make them that small,” she mused.

  “Nope,” he said, ignoring
her. “I think just the bikinis run that tiny.”

  They each seized a bathroom and changed. Zephyr slipped out of his clothes and into the swim trunks in seconds and then stood in front of the mirror and studied himself. His hair was a little longer, but he thought it worked. He looked taller, leaner, his muscles more defined than they had been just weeks ago. It was the world now— nothing came easy. Everything required work. And their idea of fun was shooting practice. Yes, his eyes were a little bloodshot and looked tired. Still, for the first time in his life, he thought he looked more like a man than a boy, and he felt good about it.

  He found a bathrobe and pulled it tight over himself before stepping back into the living room. Jordan joined him minutes later, but Aurora made them wait forever. He was about to go knock on her bathroom door to make she sure was all right when it finally swung inward and she emerged wearing the same white, fluffy bathrobe that adorned him.

  “OK, ready?” she asked.

  He rolled his eyes. “Yeah. For about an hour.”

  “Hush.”

  There was, of course, no way of knowing if the hotel was as unoccupied as it appeared to be and Zephyr insisted on a proper probe before any of them could go swimming. Jordan groaned, but Aurora said it was the smart thing to do. So, dressed in bathrobes and armed with guns, the three of them explored the entire grounds, knocked on some doors, and looked for any recent signs of activity. Save for some leftover clothes, though, they never discovered any evidence of anybody.

  His paranoia never quite dissipated, and yet the pool was too good to pass up. When they finally set their weapons down nearby and approached the waters, a smile crept over his face. He loved to swim. Was pretty good at it, too. He’d been a standout member of the high school swim team before the world broke down. When he dipped his toe in, he discovered it not just warm, but Jacuzzi-hot, and without looking back at the girls, he disrobed and dove.

  “Is it great?” Jordan called to him when his head came topside again. She was practically vibrating with excitement on the edge of the pool, her robe now tossed in a pile behind her.

  “It’s nice and hot. Come on in.”

  She didn’t wait for another invitation. Aurora, meanwhile, watched them from her perch on a nearby lounge chair, her arms crossed as though trying to hug away the cold.

  “What’re you doing?” Zephyr called. “It feels great. Hop in here.”

  She reached into the pockets of her robe and pulled out bottles of shampoo and body wash respectively, placed them both at the edge of the pool, started to disrobe and then glanced at Zephyr, at which point she stopped.

  “You coming?” he asked.

  “OK, so…” She studied her fingers. “I can’t get in with you looking. I thought I could. But I can’t.”

  “Why not?” He knew he was enjoying this much more than he should, but he couldn’t stop himself.

  For once, she didn’t have a response to his query, and if the sun had been shining and there was any real visibility at their little oasis, he was sure her cheeks would prove bright red.

  “All right,” he finally relented and turned around. “Better hurry, though, because I might be tempted to take a little peek here.”

  “Don’t!”

  “I’m just kidding. Take it easy. Get in already then.”

  There came a little splash as she lowered herself into the water and even then he kept his promise and stared in the opposite direction.

  “All clear?” he finally asked.

  “Yeah.”

  She submerged herself and moved toward the far end of the pool with the broad, sweeping strokes of a practiced swimmer. As he watched, Jordan’s head appeared beside him and he had no time to react as she spit water directly into his face. When the giggling girl tried to swim away, he gave chase, caught and then tickled her until she threatened to pee in the pool. Then he hoisted her high and dunked her. She came up laughing. The two of them played in this way for several minutes and finally Jordan surrendered and swam to the shallow end of the pool to practice hand-stands. So he paddled over to Aurora’s corner and when she saw him coming, she allowed herself to sink deeper into the water.

  “What’s going on over here?” he asked as he drew near.

  She was neither standing nor fully swimming. Instead, she treaded in place, and every so often used her arms to push and float.

  “Just enjoying the warmth.”

  “I gotta admit, it’s pretty nice.” When she made no reply to this, he asked, “All right, is something wrong?”

  “No—I just…” She finally met his gaze. “It’s a little different now. Us. Since we kissed. Don’t you think?”

  “Different in a good way or bad way?”

  “Good. No, definitely good. Just, different.”

  “How so?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. I guess I’m afraid you’re…” She broke off. “It’s stupid. I like you, Zephyr. I just don’t want to mess this up.”

  “I like you, too. And you won’t. I mean, if anybody will, it’ll be me. Because I’m an idiot. I think we can both agree on that.”

  She laughed, moved closer, and wrapped her arms around him. He kissed her, and she didn’t pull away. Rather, she pushed into him, meeting his lips and body with her own. It was electric, magnetic, and wonderful. A little too wonderful.

  “So,” he fumbled, backing away, “I’m just gonna… I’ll be over there. I apologize. It’s not you. Or, I mean, it is. That last kiss. I’m… I’ll be back.” Then he started in the opposite direction.

  For a second, she only stared at him, then she cradled her mouth with both hands and giggled. “No, baby, come back,” she called. When he didn’t, she swam after and eventually caught up to him.

  Zephyr held his arms out to her. “Seriously,” he said and laughed. “Just gimme a minute.”

  “Is that all you need?” she asked and stuck her tongue out.

  “Honestly? Probably.”

  An hour later, the three of them shivered back to the suite and then divided into their respective bathrooms. Zephyr thought the hot shower felt even better than the pool. After he toweled off and slipped into a tank top and sweatpants, he beelined to the kitchen and prepared a quick snack, and as he sat on the living room couch eating Cheeze-Its crackers and wondering why swimming always made him ravenous, Jordan appeared in a brown sweatshirt and flannel pajama bottoms. Her long blonde hair was brushed and pulled into a ponytail that dangled to her back and she looked altogether cozy.

  “Can I have some?” she asked and plopped down beside him as he handed her the box. Then he leaned back, yawned and fixated on the ceiling. Jordan started fiddling with the television remote, but he barely noticed as he slid deeper into thought.

  What kind of answers did the people of Alpha really have? And how? He pondered this for a long time. No matter how he attacked the question, he always slammed into the same brick wall, which was that the event itself was so widespread, so encapsulating, that it could not possibly be manmade. And if that really was the truth of it, how could mankind hope to understand it?

  “Turn to Channel 101 to see the latest Hollywood hits,” a voice blared to some vapid jingle and he nearly rocketed away from the couch before his eyes snagged on the television. Somehow, Jordan had cued the hotel’s in-room entertainment service on the screen and it was still functional, which meant that they could rent movies or even play old Nintendo 64 games. Or so he thought, anyway. Much to the little girl’s chagrin, when they actually tried this, an error message and a suggestion to contact the front desk appeared on the unit.

  “Sorry, Jord. Looks like the hotel needs our credit card info before we can rent anything, and there’s nobody left to take it,” he said.

  She grumbled something about how nothing ever worked anymore and then meandered into the kitchen, popped the lid on a can of Pepsi, and drank. As she was doing this, Aurora’s bathroom door squeaked open and she moseyed out in her fluffy bathrobe, her hair still wrapped in a towel. S
omehow, she looked even more sedated and snug than Jordan.

  “Hi,” she said, and smiled. “What time is it? Any idea?”

  He studied the television and finally saw it on display in the upper-right corner of the screen. “Almost ten.”

  “Getting late.”

  “I know, I know,” Jordan said. “I’m going.”

  “No, that’s not what I meant—you can stay up as long as you like.”

  “It’s OK. I’m tired, anyway.” The little girl skipped to Zephyr, hopped onto his lap, hugged him and then pecked him on the cheek. “I’m gonna keep the door open a little.”

  “OK.”

  He squeezed her back, and then she rose and embraced Aurora before she bid them good-night and retreated into the bedroom. When she flipped the light off a few minutes later, the door was completely ajar, so Zephyr pulled it to a sliver.

  “Not all the way,” she called.

  “It’s still open. Night.”

  “Night.”

  Aurora lay on the thick, leather chaise beside the couch, and she smiled at him as he made his way back to the living room.

  “So?” she asked.

  “So, what?”

  “Any thoughts on how we can spend our last pre-Alpha night together or do you just want to go to bed?”

  His heart quickened at the thought of it. He had to admit, now that the possibility seemed almost within his grasp, it wasn’t exclusively exciting, but terrifying. Just sleeping next to her—

  he wasn’t sure he’d be able to get any real rest. And if it was the other thing — well, what if he sucked? Aurora was the unattainable prom queen, not the girl next door — whom, by the way, was out of his league, too. He still couldn’t believe that she had any interest in him and held true to his conviction that she would, for whatever reason, eventually discover him to be a fraud and then abandon whatever it was they had going. A bad performance in the bedroom might accelerate that inevitability.