“Could you find it in your heart to forgive him Eva?” my grandmother questioned.
It was with very little hesitation as I replied, “It totally depends on the circumstances, I know who it was with but I don't know for how long … once I know that I can answer that.”
Grandma reached out and patted my hand, “Whatever you decide my love, we're here for you.”
She stood from the table and I watched as she walked across the kitchen and washed the kitchen dishes, she looked out of the window where I guess she could see my grandfather working. Why couldn't I have found everlasting love like they had, together forever, best of friends, a team?
I hadn't come to any decisions as such, or made any plans but there was one thing that I needed confirming. I went back up to my room and made a call to John's office.
“Cain Enterprises, how may I help you?” the receptionist politely sang down the phone.
I disguised my voice and requested to be connected to John.
“I do apologize but Mr. Cain is out of office today and tomorrow, who can I say has called?”
This was exactly what I hadn't wanted to hear, “Oh, I was under the impression that Mr. Cain was holding the Mercer Conference today?”
The receptionist was being extremely helpful, “Mr. Cain postponed the conference until next month, he has actually gone away on a break for the next two days.” My stomach dropped and quite rudely I replaced the receiver without another word.
This was totally out of character for John, he was a workaholic, he never took time off work, he was clearly with Helena and they were cavorting around the country having sex everywhere! I didn't know whether I wanted to cry or be sick, my breath was sticking in my throat, I needed air. Rushing past Grandma I flew into the yard and didn't slow down until I reached the lakeside. Once I reached the water's edge I sat and calmed down, then the tears emerged, I sobbed and sobbed convulsively, my whole body shook with shock and despair. This was clearly not some fly by night fling, if John was taking time away from his priorities then it was something that was important to him. What to do next was something I needed to now work out.
As I strolled home I realized how much I missed being here, at the end of the day and whatever was in my future, I still considered this to be my home. I loved the city but I missed the noises and smells; there were no birds to be heard singing in the city and the air was so polluted you weren't able to smell anything else, here the flowers and grass and even the air smelt pretty. I walked along the path leading to Tommy's ranch which I had to pass to get home, all across the fields lining the ranch I could see the horses grazing on the fresh, deep green grass, tails whisking away flies and the odd rumble of whinnying as they ate. Horses were such powerful creatures but had always had such a calming effect on me. I climbed onto the wall to watch them. Having been sat there for about ten minutes I saw a young boy making his way across the field towards me.
“I'm afraid you can't do that Miss, this is private property and although it's not fenced off, the owner wouldn't appreciate you trespassing.”
I smiled and climbed off the wall into the ranch, this seemed to perplex the boy, he stood stock still, I think he thought that I was going to start a fight with him.
“It's ok, I know Mr. Silver personally, my family live next door, I'm Eva.” I extended my arm out to shake hands which the boy reservedly shook back. Just as the boy seemed to be trusting of me, we both heard galloping hooves. I looked over and saw Tommy coming towards us, he was riding the biggest black stallion I had ever seen, so sleek and glamorous, powerful and very, very dynamic. Pulling him over to the side of us, he began to froth at the bit, tossing his head and exerting his strength, it took most of John's own strength to contain his dominance.
“It's fine Jess, Eva is a friend of mine. Good job on the vigilance front though, she could indeed have been someone dangerous … you know what these young women are like.”
Jess blushed and made his excuses to leave, “Thanks Jess, nice to meet you.” I offered, it was unkind of Tommy to make fun of him but I knew he was only playing with him.
“Well young lady, think you can just walk around my land as and when you please do you?” He smiled, jumping down from the great height he sat upon. He casually tethered the horse to the post and took off his helmet, his blonde unkempt locks escaped and bounced back to their former glory. He was definitely a sight for sore eyes, dressed in a pair of black jodhpurs, riding boots and a clean, white polo shirt, he looked almost regal, a far cry from the raggedy young teenager I'd left behind, but had I really left him behind, I certainly didn't feel like I'd left Brereton behind and Brereton had certainly welcomed me back without any question.
“What's his name?”
Tommy looked over at his horse and proudly stroked his thick, black neck and chest, “This is Hugo, he's a belter, isn't he?”
I agreed that indeed he was, and Tommy went on to explain how he'd come across him, bought him instantly and broke him in single headedly, “He won't let anyone else ride him, we've tried but he just tosses them off every time.” Laughing he elbowed Hugo in his ribs, “You're a loyal young man aren't you Hugo?” Hugo let out a deep whinny, as if he was agreeing with Tommy.
Loyalty, now there was a word for the day. I didn't say anything but Tommy knew something was wrong. Instead of pressing me though he climbed up onto the wall where I'd sat before and held out his hand for me to join me. Sitting side by side on the perimeter of the ranch we probably looked like we had done all those years ago, only this time we were older and, maybe for Tommy, a little wiser.
“What's up, Blondie?” he playfully nudged me, and so with a great deal of self-containment, I opened up. Once I'd come to the end of the story Tommy jumped down off the wall.
“C'mon, that's enough of all that, we need to have some fun.”
I tried to object but Tommy was having none of it, “Now come on Eva, I'm not dismissing your troubles but I don't have any other advice for you apart from telling you to leave the selfish bastard, it's probably not what you want to hear so as an alternative and an insistence on my part, I will take you to have some fun. You need it and to be honest, so do I.”
So, I jumped down off the horse and before he could do anything about it, I un-tethered Hugo, jumped on his back and prepared to be tossed off, only I wasn't and as Tommy initially panicked and shouted out for me to not do it, he suddenly realized that Hugo was allowing me to stay in the saddle. We both froze in amazement; mine more with relief but nevertheless, amazement. I stroked his long, black silky mane and urged him to move forwards, he did, peacefully and happily. Tommy walked at the side of us and as we returned to the ranch house, neither of us could find any words.
Walking into the stable it seemed that my being on Hugo's back caused quite a stir, bodies popped out from everywhere to have a look, I could hear a round of applause and noticed that Jess was jumping up and down on a bale of hay with excitement. Hugo seemed to think that this was his one man, or should I say, horse show and he appeared to prance in his limelight.
Dismounting, I thanked Hugo for his good behavior and Tommy passed his reins to Jess for him to stable him.
“That was a silly risk you took then Blondie, but a well paid off one.”
I laughed at his remark, “Ah, Tommy, horses have great instincts when it comes to people and besides, I've been thrown from too many horses over the years, I wasn't afraid of that … however, I wanted to see if Hugo was privy to my feelings and you know what, I think he was. He knew I was feeling a little fragile and he behaved accordingly.”
Tommy agreed wholeheartedly, “Now, let's go get us some fun.”
He ran off ahead and into the house which in itself hadn't really changed that much, unlike the stables that had now become a growing empire. Tommy had lost his parents a couple of years back and naturally he had inherited the ranch. As kids we'd always spoken of our dreams and aspirations for the farm and the ranch and I'd always said how I'd longed to de
velop the farm into a place where people could come on their holidays and learn to ride horses. Along with the inheritance of the ranch, Tommy's parents had made some shrewd investments so with a hefty life insurance policy and the sale of the investments, Tommy had been left millions of dollars, thus being able to turn the ranch into exactly that. It wasn't like he was stealing my idea or anything, we'd both agreed on everything we'd talked about back then, I suppose we'd believed that we'd end up together and the farm and the ranch would be merged as one. I was pleased for Tommy, he deserved it.
With the truck keys in his hand we both jumped into the vehicle and headed off up into the village. “Where we going then?” I asked, not really caring but a question just for the sake of it.
“We're going to have a drink, do the pub quiz, grab something to eat and then … who knows?”
I turned on the radio, the pub quiz? Tommy wasn't wrong when he said we were going to have fun, the villagers were very serious and competitive about their weekly pub quiz, I recall Grandpa coming home from the pub one night with a bruised shin from Mrs. Withers, the local florist. He had shouted over her from an opposing team and she played hell with him, when he jokingly told her to pipe down she'd whacked him on the shin with her walking stick, he found it hilarious but she was deadly serious. Unfortunately, Mrs. Withers was no longer with us so I felt at ease that her walking stick wouldn't be making an appearance that night.
We arrived at the Swan's Neck in plenty of time to find a seat, grab a drink and gather our quiz paper and pens together. As I looked round I realized that we were actually the smallest team to be entering, however I didn't care, it was all for fun, we weren't there to win. Picking Norfolk n Chance as our team name it didn't occur to anyone that we were already joking around, it was only when the quizmaster read out our name over the microphone that it dawned on him.
The first couple of questions were pretty easy but we weren't to be fooled, the more questions, the harder it became but you could feel the tension in the room, it was thick with severity. For any of the answers that we didn't know, Tommy decided to write down a ridiculous possibility. It was childish but it made us laugh.
It was so easy to spend time with Tommy, almost like we'd never been apart, we fell back into place so naturally, verging on too naturally. It was noisy in the pub and although we attempted to talk a few times, it wasn't exactly the right night for intimate conversations and thoughts, I was thankful for the distraction. Had it not been for Tommy that day I think I would have got in my car and driven home to confront John. I realized that it had been the first time since the morning that I'd given John a thought, if my suspicions were correct he would be wining and dining the formidable Ms Grainger right now and I wickedly wished she would choke on whatever expensive meal she was eating.
There would be plenty of time for confrontation, arguments and battles when I got home, I had every intention of calling John himself tomorrow to see what he had to say, where he was and what he was doing. I had a good idea what he was doing but he had no idea that I knew, as far as he was concerned, he thought I thought he was busy with his conference for 2 days, so, catching the lying bastard telling lies to me would be him walking straight into my trap. Was it a trap, did I want some kind of lie to be proved, did I want revenge? I don't really know which direction my intentions were heading but for the time-being that seemed sufficient, for now I needed to concentrate on the night.
The drinks were flowing and everyone was smiling, the atmosphere was warm and I felt content, I was spending time with someone who liked me for whom I was, embraced my physique and saw no faults in me. I don't for one minute portray myself to be perfect, who is? But with Tommy I knew he loved me. I was surrounded by ordinary, down to earth people who didn't give a stuff who was currently head of the FTSE Index or who held the Forbes magazine cover that month. I doubt some of these people even knew who Donald Trump was, never mind John Cain. But, looking around, they were all happy; myself included to a certain degree, perhaps my own inner happiness had been here all the time. I would never say that my education or time in the city was a waste, and if John and I were to separate I wouldn't have any regrets but I was starting to think that perhaps my true destiny was here in Brereton, whether or not Tommy was a part of that remained to be seen.
My cheeks were in pain by the time we left the pub. Of course, we didn't win, we didn't even come close but it was all in good spirit and I'd loved watching everyone else's enjoyment just as much as I relished my own. Tommy slipped his hand onto my shoulder as we walked down the steps and into the street. The village was quiet and it dawned on me that most of the villagers were in the pub that night. The village itself was compact and self-contained, only storekeepers had vehicles because everywhere was within walking distance for the villagers, it seemed strange to see very few cars but can you imagine how clean the air was? There wasn't one single house that wasn't spotlessly maintained, beautiful lawns and gardens, paintwork immaculate and no litter to be seen, anywhere, it was idyllic and picturesque, I did feel more at home in the country than I ever had done in the city.
I had of course been aware of Tommy's hand on my shoulder but it was merely a protective gesture rather than a possessive or suggestive manner. It was when he gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze that it took me slightly by surprise, I looked up at him, “What?”
“Nothing … you having fun?” he asked with an amused smiled.
“I am actually, just what I needed, thank you Tommy, and you're a good friend.”
I felt Tommy's hand go into mine and he stopped us from proceeding, “Is that all I am Eva?”
I looked into Tommy's eyes, his sweet, kind eyes and my heart indeed melted, “I'm married Tommy.”
“For now, but surely you're not going to continue now you've caught him out?” The questioning on Tommy's face was determined to get to the bottom of my feelings and it unnerved me slightly.
“Tommy, John may have been rumbled … but at the end of the day, he still deserves a chance to explain and … I need to hear why he's chosen to do what he's done.” I paused but decided against holding back, “My feelings have never changed for you Tommy but at the moment you're a complication in an already messy situation.”
Without any kind of warning Tommy held my face and kissed me full on the lips, my immediate reaction was to pull away but I couldn't help falling into him, as his arms wrapped themselves around me I felt instantaneous safety, it was wrong but it felt just right. Running my hands up his strong back I could feel all the muscles rippling beneath my fingers and all I wanted to do was stay like this forever, nothing had changed between us, we were embarking on the same journey we'd taken twenty years ago.
“Let's go back to mine.” Tommy proposed and I couldn't find it in myself to refuse, I wanted this just as much as Tommy did and if infidelity was John's game then I could play it too.
It wasn't discussed but we found ourselves waking towards the stables back at the farm, on automatic pilot we pulled open the stable door and the familiar aroma hit me, in a kind of surreal fashion we were teenagers again; the smells, the nerves fluttering in my stomach and an intense feeling of anticipation. Neither of us were novices but we might as well have been, I'd never wanted anything so much, yet at the same time I wanted to run for the hills.
CHAPTER 5 – THE AWAKENING
I barely had chance to do anything further before Tommy's hands were upon me, like an eagle intensifying his prey before death he held onto my shoulders, his eyes had darkened with a pool of desire.
“You know this is right Eva; we're right, it was meant to be.”
His lips found mine and the feeling of overwhelming pleasure that took over my body was reminiscent of a thousand orgasms rolled into one. I had always loved kissing Tommy and now was certainly no different. As we'd enjoyed that same kiss 20 years previous, I now felt it with more reason, a definite conviction. Both our hands began to wander and as we clutched at each other's clothes and explored one anoth
er's skin, I couldn't help sensing the electricity that was bouncing between us.
Tommy seemed to know every place that I liked to be kissed, including the really sensitive area behind my ear which seemed to have a G-spot waiting to be tickled, as soon as his tongue flickered over it I suddenly stepped up a gear. Pulling Tommy down onto the floor, we were cushioned by straw and hay, and as we writhed and wrestled with each other's naked bodies there was eagerness, almost a necessity that neither of us could control nor stop, or even wanted to.
Rodeo (BBW Cowboy Romance) (BBW Western Romance) Page 9