“You promise?” he asked with some uncertainty as he began to give in to her touch. Addicted.
She reached inside his pants and grabbed him and began to massage the stiffness of his hesitation. She nibbled at his neck and earlobes and tugged at his hair. “If you take care of me, I will take care of you.” Savannah pushed him back on the bed and grabbed the protection from the nightstand, applying it to his readiness. She climbed on top of him and lowered her body over his need.
“You promise?” Jesse’s eyes closed as he phrased the question, trying to maintain some form of control. “You are going to be my Kryptonite, aren’t you?” he asked as his hands reached for her.
“Jesse,” she whispered his name and began to slowly move her hips up and down. “If you love me, I will love you back.”
He quickly worked his way out of his pants and rolled her to her back, looking down at her with loving eyes. “You promise?”
“I promise,” she whispered to him, as he slowly made love to her, connecting them on a new level. It was a bad idea and he knew it. She knew it, but they were getting in deeper. At the end of the journey, someone was going to get hurt. There was no way around it.
The room was softly lit as the two snuggled under the covers, each one mindful of questions, concerns, and the fear of losing what they had found in each other.
“Savannah,” he called her name softly as she snuggled closer to him, her body indicating she had heard him call her name. “Why me? I mean, have you dated a white guy before or am I one of those things on your bucket list?”
Savannah slightly raised her left leg, allowing her calf to drape over his as she rubbed her soft leg against his very hairy one. “I have never dated a white guy before. You would be my first.” She continued to rub his leg with hers. “I guess,” she paused to collect her thoughts. “The night in my bathroom, when I touched you, everything in me came to life. Since then, I have never been more alive, filled with this new energy. I think if I try, I can do anything or be anything. I feel ...” she paused, “... whole again, when I’m with you.”
Jesse kissed her shoulder, tugging at a lock of her hair.
“What about you, Jesse? Do you have a love of darker berries?”
He was quiet for a moment. “No. You, too, are my first.”
“Why me? If I may borrow your question.”
Again he was quiet. “Great peace.”
Savannah bolted upright in the bed. “Do you mean p-e-a-c-e or p-i-e-c-e?”
Jesse pulled her back down into the bed, flinging his thigh across her legs as if to hold her steady. “P-e-a-c-e,” he spelled back to her. “I think I was five years old when I wielded my first hammer.”
In the past few months, Savannah had learned that he needed a few minutes to gather his thoughts with a usually spot-on analogy. She listened intently when he explained that he was a certified brick mason, as was his father, his father’s father, and his father before him. “I am also a certified welder, a certified electrician, and a certified H.V.A.C. mechanic. No one can walk onto my job site and tell me something about a project without me fully understanding what they are talking about. But ...” he paused briefly. “... there was never a question of what I would be or do when I grew up.”
Jesse explained that he came from a family of construction workers. The women he had dated all came from construction families. “If I had continued on that path, I would have married one to unite the family businesses. As the eldest child, it is given that I will take over after my father retires.”
Savannah said nothing as she waited for him to bring the words back full circle. “The night you kissed me in your bathroom, I went home a bit uncomfortable, but I slept.”
She turned in the bed to face him, wanting to understand.
“I have not slept well in seven years.” He kissed her on the nose. “That is, until I met you. I go home at night and sleep so comfortably, restful and content.”
His eyelids drooped a bit as if he were giving up the battle for sleep. He muttered the next words before drifting off, “I am cared for, loved, and I finally belong to someone. I am at peace.”
Soft snores filled the room as she lay there in the soft light of the lamp watching this gigantic man, covered in muscles, callouses, and way too much body hair. He was a gentle giant who wanted nothing more than to be loved and cared for. It seemed simple enough because Savannah knew she had started to feel deeply for him as well.
Chapter Fifteen
Saturday at 11 am, Jesse arrived with his toolbox and Chinese takeout. He didn’t want her to cook on a Saturday. Outside on the small covered patio was the completed headboard that Savannah had meticulously worked on. Jesse checked the joints and corners, and eyed the small finishing nails she used to connect the pieces. He was impressed with her use of the sander to smooth out the edges on the wood.
“I thought about covering the headboard with padding and fabric, but I love natural wood best,” she told him as she walked through the steps she had taken to complete the headboard, including the whitewood ornaments used to enhance the clean lines.
“This looks really good. One thing though,” he told her and she waited for his criticism. “The back has to be stained as well to protect the wood even though it will be against the wall.” Savannah stood there blinking at him, still waiting for him to tell her it was not good enough, but he didn’t. Instead, he took a look at the plans and noticed she had modified the drawings. He went to work on laying out the frame for the bed.
In less than an hour, the structure of the first side of the bed was complete. They took a quick break for lunch. As they sat at the kitchen counter she explained some of the changes she had made. The original drawing was too bulky and she liked the open squares better, for books, baskets, and options. Jesse ate in silence. A bit of sawdust and shellac was in the tresses of her hair. He stood close as he removed the bits of flakes until they were all gone, finally running his fingers through her hair.
“Savannah, can I ask you something?” he said as he held the jet black strands in his fingers. She flinched a little uncertain of what was coming, but told him to fire away.
“I noticed several black women patting themselves on the head. What is that about?”
Savannah stopped chewing and looked at him with uncertainty of where the question came from. But now? It was weird. “They do it because their scalp is dry and itching.”
“Why not just scratch the itch?”
“It will loosen the bond or the stitching of their hair extensions,” she said and went back to eating her chicken and mixed vegetables. Jesse stared at her in utter confusion. Savannah explained that oftentimes hair extensions are either sewn or glued in. After several weeks of sweating and no air to the scalp, it begins to itch. “Scratching can loosen the bonds or stitches as well as flake up the dry scalp, so the women pat themselves on the head instead to keep the style intact.” Jesse glanced at her hair.
“This is all mine,” she told him with a chuckle. He inquired about the thickness and length. “My grandmother was a Choctaw Indian. My mother has many of the Indian features. I inherited the nose, hair, and some of the coppery undertones in my skin. My brother, Jerwane, looks like a black American Indian.”
He stared at her face, taking it all in. The next question nearly made her fall off the stool. “What kind of hair would our children have?’
Instead of panicking, Savannah allowed the scientist in her to take over. She talked about recessive genes and dominant traits, including the fact that since they were both dark haired, the child would most likely have dark hair. “However, there is a high probability of the child having a dusky blonde colored hair, simply because of the mixed races.”
Jesse went back to his lunch then back to work, only stopping once that afternoon to ask, “When is your birthday?”
“November 8th,” she told him as she hammered the nails into the wood, double-checking her work with the level, ensuring the sides had been put tog
ether evenly. “When is yours?”
He held the other side of the wood, joining his piece to hers as she drove in a nail. “August 24th.”
They stopped at the same time and looked at each other. Jesse added, “That is supposed to be the ideal match, cosmically.”
“I was thinking the same thing,” she said before she shrugged and went back to work on the bed.
By the end of the evening, both sides of the bed were complete. The only things left to do was build the base, stain it, and move it to the room. She was pleased with what they had accomplished. Jesse patted her on the back and packed his things.
“You’re leaving?”
“Yes, let’s not push our luck.” He stepped inside and closed the patio door. In the kitchen, away from prying eyes, he took her in is arms and kissed her. “I will see you on Thursday evening.”
Chapter Sixteen
July
Jesse sat in the conference room at Montgomery Construction staring out the window. Although he was not alone, his thoughts drifted into nothingness as he questioned the morality of the choice he was about to make. In his heart, he was not this type of man.
The bids for the contracts for the Riverchase units were up in the air, and he held the deciding votes. It would be easy to award the contract to a company that had worked on other projects, but it might be wise to allow another firm the opportunity to be a part of the Montgomery Construction team. The plans were simple. The ground had been broken and the utility lines were being put into place. In a month, the concrete would be poured and the architect would begin meeting with the new condo owners. There was little room for error, and at this late stage, it would be foolproof.
If the contract was awarded to Green & Associates, the firm which employed one Darwin Finney, then that man would be occupied for at least six months to a year. New homeowners were fussy. They were picky and they took a great deal of finesse and handling. Jesse wasn’t sure that Darwin possessed the capability to do the job, but his credentials were impeccable. This type of project would either make him a better man or show his true colors. One thing Jesse was certain of was something he had learned first-hand—these types of projects took a toll on relationships. In order to do it right, the hours required would wreak havoc on a fledgling marriage. Assigning this project to Darwin Finney would end his relationship with Savannah.
He heard his named called, but refused to answer as he pondered a choice that would say a great deal about the type of man he was becoming. Jesse held up his hand begging for a moment of private thought. Sweet thoughts wandered to Savannah’s beautiful lips, those long silken cinnamon legs, and a sweet spot that tasted like nectar from the gods. His body was reacting to the thought of those legs wrapped around his waist. When they were in bed, she gave herself freely, holding nothing back and satisfying him in a way that resonated into his soul.
Jesse’s brow furrowed when he again thought of Darwin coming home to his dinners, his meatloaf and mashed potatoes, and his homemade apple pie and grape Kool-Aid. His breathing became ragged as he imagined her packing Mr. Insensitive’s lunch for work. He could almost stomach the idea of sharing her love with him, but it was the thought of her belly being swollen with that asshole’s child that pushed him toward the edge.
He didn’t want to be this type of man, but she was making him fight for her love, her affection, and his Thursdays in Savannah. Fuck it. He hated sharing and Darwin had to go. Jesse popped to his feet, alarming everyone at the table.
“I say we assign the contract to fresh eyes. Let’s go with Green & Associates, let that Finney guy serve as the architect. He can’t screw it up any worse than Jacob did on the last one.” He left his notes on the desk and made his way for the door. It was Thursday and there was a beautiful woman awaiting his arrival. Both the dinner and the loving would be hot and ready when he walked in the door.
On Sunday, he would head to the church and pray for his sins, but right now there was one sin that was calling his name. His smile was genuine as he pulled from his assigned parking space at Montgomery Construction and hit the road. He punched in her number. She answered the phone with an actual purr.
“I am on my way to stroke that kitty.”
Darwin sat at the dinner table on Sunday with Savannah and her mother with a gloat on his face. He was totally pleased with himself, as he bragged to both of them about being named as the lead architect on a new job. This was awful. Savannah found herself excited for him, but not for the same reason.
He leaned back in his chair and sipped his coffee, boasting about the number of hours that were required to do the job well. Savannah’s only thought was the number of hours she would be free to be with Jesse. His birthday was coming up and she wanted to do something special. The chances of doing something outside of her condo were small, but behind those doors, she could do whatever the hell she wanted.
She and Jesse had laid out a few smaller projects after they finished the bed to ensure his Saturday visits, but she wasn’t sure what she was doing. Her patience with Darwin had increased as he tried to learn how to please her body, but it always ended the same way. Six minutes of heavy breathing, four short thrusts and he would be done. Some attempts had been made with penile rings to lengthen his staying power, but sex for Darwin was about him. His feelings, emotions, and sex drive were all compelled by his selfish need to please himself first. A life of sexual frustration seemed less appealing each time she lay under him and lied.
Chapter Seventeen
August
Jesse wanted to be honest with Savannah, but their entire relationship was built on an untruth. Tonight, there was no sex. Jesse had something on his chest and it was not moving. This had a direct effect on what was not happening in his pants. He took a deep breath as he gazed deep into her eyes. “Savannah, I am in trouble here.”
Her hands rested upon his, with eyes encouraging him to say what was troubling his heart. It felt like a blow to the chest when Jesse admitted, “I am falling hard for you.” He spoke softly. “I had a say in the awarding of the contract.” He waited for her admonishment.
“I understand what you are going through. It’s a rough road we are traveling. I feel like warm, runny defecation in white pants,” she said as she held his hands.
Jesse’s eyebrows went up as he tried to imagine, but not imagine the image she had just given him. He shook his head, trying to remove the visual from his mind. Savannah rubbed the fine hairs on the back of his hands. “I know, but I’m happy to have him out of our way for a while.”
There was no way to hide his frustration as he raised his voice to her, “Then why in the hell are you still planning to marry him?”
Carefully, using her words in a softened tone, Savannah explained that passion was great for keeping things interesting, but not required to maintain a long-term relationship. Nights of hot sweaty sex don’t pay the bills, feed the children, or afford nice vacations. “I want a nice life, with nice things.”
“But don’t you want those things with a man who listens and appreciates you Savannah?”
“I have those things. What he appreciates in me is not the same thing you value in me. One can stand the long haul. The other goes away when my belly is swollen and I have no desire for sex.”
Jesse was angered that she could only see him in a sexual way, regardless of the hours he had put into her projects to show another side of himself. “What about love, Savannah?”
The calmness of the delivery of her words was far more unsettling than her views on committing her heart to another. Love, she told him, was the one word the Bible took pages to define what it was not.
“Love ...” she told him. “... emptied my bank accounts and ran off to be a casino dealer in Biloxi. Without that money, I sat in the dark for two weeks, living by batteries and candlelight. I ate cheap salty noodles or leftovers from my mother’s house for nearly three months. I went on dates with people I didn’t like just to get a decent meal. I have not been upright
since. I still live paycheck to paycheck, always afraid that something will get skewed and I lose everything ... again.”
Jesse watched with some concern as Savannah stared him in the face, delivering a statement that nearly crippled him, “Love has never done shit for me but break my heart. I don’t need love to survive, Jesse. I need security.”
This was something they would disagree on and it was hurting him. He had made a decision to reward a man with a job so he could have free reign with his woman. A woman who has just confessed she did not need, or believe in, love. Jesse’s stomach rolled as he realized the complexity of his dilemma. He loved a woman who was not sure she knew how to love him back, although she promised she would. She lied to him, to get him into bed.
What was he thinking? She promised to marry the other sap and look at what she was doing to him. He thought about the guy in the parking garage who was obsessed with her. He had gotten a face full of pepper spray and a nut shot. He needed to get out of here and he needed to leave now. Once she touched him again, his power to do so left, along with his resolve. He had fallen into a trap, a trap he didn’t think he could get out of, but there had to be a way to show her that she did love him and it was okay to do so.
Lake Purdy was beautiful this time of year. Jesse sat with his father, dangling a pole at the edge of the water, waiting for a bite. Big Sam, as friends and family called him, watched his son with some interest. Seeing there was something troubling his eldest child, he wanted, like any father, to fix the issue. He could see, however, that whatever was sitting on his shoulders was a big load.
Jesse was a great deal like his mother, Big Sam thought as he watched the snake make his way across the grass. It was nonpoisonous, so he said nothing as the reptile sought a place to shelter itself from the early morning sun. Big Sam adored his wife, but sometimes that woman made a mountain out of an ant farm and would overanalyze everything to the point of obsolescence. When it was all said and done, the simplest solution was evaded, only to be replaced by a long-term plan that was just too tiring to even consider.
Thursdays in Savannah Page 8