by S. Herrera
I knock softly on her door, hoping not to draw too much attention to myself.
She swings the door open and greets me before walking away. “Did you have a hard time finding the place?” She asks as she is opening cupboards and getting out plates, bowls, and silverware.
“Nope.” I leave out the part about being here before with her brother and Wren.
“Oh good. I've called and ordered a ton of Chinese food. That sound good?”
“That sounds perfect.”
“Do you want to watch a movie?” Sawyer looks over her shoulder at me and I really take her in.
Her auburn hair has a slight curl to it, hanging loose and messy down her back. She's in tight workout leggings that cling to her skin. And a small, cropped t-shirt that allows a small sliver of skin to show between the two pieces of fabric.
“Wyatt?” She says, interrupting whatever that was.
“Yes, a movie sounds great.” I answer, thankfully remembering what the question was.
Sawyer smirks, like she totally knows I was checking her out. Because that's totally what I was doing, but she’s Knox's little sister.
I turn and walk over to the couch while she moves around in the kitchen. Shrugging off my coat, I dig my phone out of the pocket before tossing it on to the chair.
When the screen lights up, I see a text waiting from Wren. Man, the guy has a sixth sense.
Wren: What are you up to today? Want to grab dinner?
Shit. I don't lie to Wren. But I can't tell him that I'm hanging out with Sawyer alone. At her place.
Me: Actually, I've got dinner plans.
Wren: Date?
Me: No, just a friend.
Not a total lie. As long as he doesn't ask who it is, we are good.
Wren: Who?
Wren: Did you hear the news?
There it is. I was wondering why he would want to give up time with his wife to have dinner with me. He leaves in just a couple short months for spring training.
Me: Yes, Everly called me. I’m fine.
Wren: Okay. If you’re sure…
Me: I am. Talk to you later.
I toss my phone onto the chair along with my coat at the same time Sawyer walks into the living room.
“Let’s pick a movie while we wait for the food to get here.” She plops herself down onto the couch next to me and kicks her feet up on the coffee table.
The differences between her and Knox are glaringly obvious. It’s hard to believe they’re even related sometimes. But I push that thought out of my head and choose to see her as more than just his little sister but no more than a friend.
chapter four
“If you don't stop moving, you will be walking down the aisle with a scrunchie in your hair, Everly.” I tell her, as I attempt to pull her hair tightly into braids at the top.
“Would you really do that do me on my wedding day?” Everly's brows furrow in concern.
“Stop moving, and you won't have to find out.”
She stares at me for a few seconds in the mirror before the trance is broken by Charlotte coming into the room, rattling off who is here and what’s left to do before everyone walks down the aisle.
When we get out there today, I won't be standing up front with the bride and groom. I will be sitting in the front row, holding the most important guest at the event, Emerson.
After everything I have done and put my family through, I'm glad to be here and have an important part of this day. Getting to be here for the holidays and huge family moments like this make me reflect, and I'm so grateful to have a loving and patient family.
In the months since I've been home, there have only been a handful of times that I have been tempted to leave. It was the hardest when Erik was calling every day in the beginning. Since I'm a glutton for punishment, I wouldn't change my number. Once the calls started to drop off just after a few weeks, there was even a part of me that was upset.
Logically, I know leaving the way I did was going to be the only way I got out of there. I feel guilt or something like it sometimes, knowing he must have stopped calling because he found someone else. I hoped that he wasn't treating her badly, but I know the truth. Erik is broken, and until he works on himself, he will always be the same.
Charlotte's voice breaks through the haze of memories I've lost myself in. I mentally shake it away and focus on the finishing touches of Everly's hair.
I listen as Everly lists off the things she wants to say to my brother in her vows and Charlotte writes them down, trying to help her finish them last minute.
I smile because Knox has found his forever in Everly. She is absolutely perfect for him in a way that means she will challenge him at every turn and drive him crazy.
I finish up Everly's hair and she hides away in the bathroom to do her makeup and write her vows. Charlotte takes Emerson and starts getting her ready for her dress. I take these free moments walking to the door where Wyatt is supposed to be waiting for Everly. I'm happy to find, as I open the door, he is leaning against one of the columns.
Wyatt straightens and sticks his phone in his pocket. “Is it time?” he asks.
“Not yet. She's finishing up, but I wanted to come say hi.”
His smile is my favorite. It's big, carefree, and so happy that you can't help but return it. The smile reaches his eyes, making it easy to get lost in. “So really, you just came to see me.”
“Yeah, I wanted to make sure you remembered what you were supposed to do. I don't want you messing up their wedding.” I joke, poking him in the chest. His solid, broad chest.
“Well, considering I have gone through all of it multiple times with each one of you women, and even once with Knox... I think I've got it.”
“Wait, Knox made you go through it with him?”
“Yes. He wanted to make sure I knew which direction the aisle was and that I walk Everly in that direction towards him instead of kidnapping her and running away. Of course.”
“I would have paid to be there.” I laugh, resting my hand on his arm.
“Wren was. And he laughed the entire time. There might be pictures, possibly a video.” He deadpans.
“Was there alcohol involved in this?” I eye him, trying my best to hold back the laughter that keeps wanting to bubble up.
He just gives me a look that says, what do you think?
I let the laughter loose, his serious face being the final nail in the coffin. But I'm cut off when I hear Charlotte giving everyone their orders to get moving.
“Well, it sounds like we are getting close.” I look back over my shoulder, listening for anyone to come out the door. “Are you sure that you're okay doing this?” I ask. I still worry about his heart when it comes to Everly.
“I'm good, Sawyer. If I weren’t, I wouldn't have agreed to do it. Trust me.” He reaches out, taking my hand in his and giving it a good squeeze. “I am walking one of my best friends down the aisle to her future. It's an honor to hold this place since her father can't.” He squeezes my hand one more time before releasing it, allowing me to walk back into the house.
When I walk back inside, everything happens quickly. As Everly gets Emerson dressed, Charlotte sends the moms outside to find their seats, and I give Emmy a quick kiss and head out to my own seat.
I find my seat, waiting and watching. I watch Knox pacing back and forth when Wren leaves him to walk Charlotte down the aisle. He turns and faces the lake, waiting until he hears the music that will bring him his future wife, the mother of his sweet baby girl.
When he finally turns, I see the stress leave his body as every muscle relaxes and pure happiness crosses his face. I'm pretty sure there was even a tear. I turn to watch Wyatt and Everly walking towards us, arm in arm with Emerson holding on to Everly. They look like a family.
This can’t be an easy image for my brother to see. It’s all his fears come to life. But judging by the look on his face, it’s like Wyatt doesn’t even exist.
The sight of them causes something to
stir in my chest. It just looks right, Wyatt with a beautiful woman and child by his side.
As they get closer, I force myself to push all those thoughts away and focus on my part, Emerson. When they make it to the front row, Everly kisses the top of Emmy’s head and hands her off to me. She starts to fuss for just a moment until she realizes that it’s Auntie Sawyer that has her.
We sit and watch them walk the last ten feet before Wyatt takes the seat beside me. My free hand not holding Emerson is resting on my leg until Wyatt loops his pinkie through mine, dragging my hand down into his.
And that’s how we stay for the rest of the ceremony. My hand in his, never looking at each other, never speaking a word.
The reception feels just one big dinner party. Our close family and friends are all here to celebrate Knox and Everly. The official, legal, start of their little family. Maybe they didn't do things in the right order, and there was a time that no one really knew if they would even end up together. But they did it.
“Hey,” Wyatt says, coming to sit next to me at the table saved for our group.
“Hey yourself.” I say, taking a quick glance to see that we are alone, and no one seems to be paying us any attention.
I'm not really sure why we try so hard to hide our friendship. Other than the fact that my brother would probably hate it. He would for sure hate it.
It could also be because we both know, deep down there is something more than friendship here. And if anyone else were to see us, they would know it too.
“This turned into quite the party for being in the middle of the week.”
“Right? I totally get what she was doing by making him get married on Valentine’s Day, but did it have to be a Wednesday? Classes are going to drag tomorrow.” I joke, but I would have been here no matter what day of the week it was.
“This is Everly and Knox we’re talking about.” He doesn’t need to say any more than that, we both get the point.
We sit there at the table, just the two of us. Talking and eating as the party goes on around us. Friendship with Wyatt is easy, and I find myself smiling constantly.
Aside from the short time that everyone in the wedding party sat down to eat, Sawyer has been alone at our table while everyone else dances and mingles with the few guests, most of them we don't see all the time.
Knox and Everly's wedding is much smaller than Charlotte and Wren's was. Partly because Everly doesn't have much family outside of us. Knox only invited a few family members of his own, aside from his parents and Sawyer. But a small intimate wedding is fitting for these two. Everyone that matters is here.
A small wedding also means that it doesn't go unnoticed that Sawyer and I have spent the entire evening talking and laughing with each other.
At first, I hadn't thought anything of it. Being around her is so familiar since we have been hanging out lately. Then I started to notice the glances, and Wren's increasingly frequent trips back to the table.
He’s starting to get suspicious, and while Wren likes to keep things to himself “just to see how things play out”, I feel like this is one that he won't keep to himself. And the last thing I want is to ruin this night for Everly because her new husband barely tolerates me as is.
“Wyatt, I have a huge favor to ask. You don't have to say yes, but it would mean a lot if you did.”
“What is it, Everly?” I try not to let the worry seep into my words, but she's got me on edge.
“How would you feel about walking me down the aisle at my wedding?” She says the words quickly, like she has to get them out before she loses her nerve.
I blow out the breath I'd been holding. Replaying her question in my head and asking myself, how would I feel?
I've spent months trying to convince everyone around us that I'm fine and moving on from Everly. But it's in this moment that I stop and really think about how true that is. I'm waiting to feel something, some sort of pain, regret, or even betrayal at what she is asking of me.
But I don't find it.
I don't come up with any jealousy, or envy, wishing that it were me instead of Knox. I'm actually honored that she is asking me of all people.
“I would love that, Everly.” I tell her before thinking of Knox. “Wait. How does Knox feel about this?”
My words are met with silence. “Everly?”
“Well...” She drags the word out before finishing. “He wasn't thrilled when I brought it up, so I decided to ask you first and see if you were even willing to do it.”
“Of course, I’m willing to do it. But I don’t want it to start something between you and Knox.”
“It’s really important to me, Wyatt. And I know Knox will understand and be on board once he has time to cool down.” Her tone is calm, and I feel like it’s the truth. Knox will understand, he loves her enough to put his feelings about me aside to make her happy.
“I’ll do it.”
“Thank you. It means a lot to me and I think Dad would love that I chose one of my very best friends to take his place.” The emotion is thick in her voice, and I have to clear it from my own throat before agreeing with her and ending the phone call.
Knox ribbing me about which direction I was going to lead Everly was the first and only time he addressed the fact that I would be walking her down the aisle. But I can’t blame him for the animosity between us.
We’d finally put our differences aside when Wren and Charlotte needed us to be there. Then I blamed him for my relationship with Everly ending and stepped in as Everly’s support when she was pregnant with his baby. So, I can see where he might be a little frustrated with my existence.
I look next to me where Sawyer sits in a long green gown with her red hair pulled to the side in huge, elegant curls. Anything more than friendship with her would only add to his reasons for not liking me and might push him further away from being able to tolerate me like he does now.
“Hey, do you want to dance?” Sawyer asks, as she turns and catches me watching her.
I want to tell her that we probably shouldn't and that it's not a good idea. But the way she bites her lip, waiting for my response…
I can't tell her no.
Instead, I offer her my hand and lead her out onto the dance floor when she takes it. I can feel the eyes on us, but I never take mine from her.
From the countless hours we have spent talking, I know how she hates to be the center of attention. In high school, she used to crave it. She lived for the cheers when she crossed the finish line. Now, after everything she has been through in the last year, she prefers to be on the sidelines, blending in.
The song is a slower one, and I spin her around the dance floor with an ease I haven't felt in a long time. She leans into me, allowing me to take control instead of fighting me for it. With her head resting on my chest, and her body in my arms, something changes between us.
I try to focus on the song and moving my feet around the floor. The man sings about her needing something that she’s never had before and how he wants to give it to her. That her heart doesn’t deserve breaking and he’s willing to give her whatever she wants and needs if he’s her man.
By the time the song ends, our bodies are pressed together, closer than we should be. With her pressed to me, I can feel every beat of her heart beating as rapidly as mine. It’s not from the dancing. Sawyer lifts her head to look up at me, bringing her lips only inches from mine. My eyes dart from her eyes to her lips and back up.
“Let’s go grab a drink.” Wren’s hand claps down on my shoulder, saving me before I can do anything stupid.
Broken out of my trance, my hold on Sawyer loosens, and I take a step back, putting some space between us. Her arms drop from around me and she takes a smaller step back as Wren removes his hand from my shoulder.
“I’ll meet you over there?” It comes out as more of a question than a statement, he’s obviously unsure about how to read the situation.
Something about his words kick me back into gear. “Yeah, sure.
” I say as I offer Sawyer my hand to lead her back to the table, but we don’t make it very far before her dad stops us.
“You owe me a dance, Bug.” Ben says to Sawyer before looking at me. “I’ll take her from here.” His smile is tight and maybe a little forced.
I smile politely, glancing at Sawyer before making my way to where the bar is set up to meet Wren.
“What are you doing?” Wren says as soon as I walk up to him. I point at his water and he nods toward the cooler that he pulled his from. I take my time grabbing a water before answering him.
“I am dancing at a wedding and getting a drink. What are you doing?” Wren isn't amused by my answer, if the eyeroll and clenched fist are any indication.
“Let me rephrase, smartass. What are you doing with Sawyer?” His voice drops a few levels when he says her name, looking around as if to make sure no one heard him.
“Again, dancing. We are friends, Wren. Like the rest of us.” I open and down about half the bottle of water as he carefully debates what to say next.
“It didn't look like it does with the rest of us.” He takes a drink of his own water. It's Wren though, so I know he isn't finished with me quite yet. But he's struggling to find the words and that's unusual for him, he always knows what to say.
“This is a dangerous game to play, Wyatt.” He pauses, looking around us again. “That's his little sister, and she's been through a lot in this last year.”
“There is no game. And I'm aware of what she's been through.” I tell him, honestly. “What exactly do you think is going on here?”
He takes a deep breath and blows it out before answering. “I think your pursuing her out of some misguided attempt at getting over Everly and maybe getting back at Knox.”
I don't give him the satisfaction of denying his claims because we both they’re bullshit. It pisses me off that he would even think of me that way. Without looking at him I walk away towards the table that has our names on it. If he wants to keep talking, he can follow me.