Bridesmaid Lotto

by Rachel Astor

  If it hadn’t been for the massive house, the private lake, and well, the personal chef, I’d have almost forgotten that I was out on a date with a movie star.

  The meal was unbelievably fantastic, it really was better than anything we could have eaten at a restaurant, plus having an ultra private meal with Jake was icing on the cake. I would have been happy eating at a crowded restaurant, of course, but this was so much better.

  On the flight home I began to get sleepy. The combination of the fresh air and the wine was starting to get to me. By the time we arrived back to my house in his sports car I was asleep on his shoulder.

  Blinding strobe like lights woke me up as Jake was pulled up to my building.

  “Well, I guess the paparazzi found out about our date,” he said, obviously not too shaken up over the whole thing.

  “Oh shit,” I said.

  I wondered if the other Bridesmaids knew that my prize had been a date with Jake. If not, they’d be pretty pissed off tomorrow. Especially Rebecca.

  Jake was the perfect gentleman and walked me to my door. Thank goodness no one else was allowed into the building, even though the paparazzi, being the paparazzi, certainly tried to push in when we entered.

  At my door, which thankfully was three floors up, Jake must have decided we were safe.

  “I had a great time today,” he said.

  “Me too,” I said and smiled.

  He leaned in and kissed me again. I inhaled deeply, wanting to remember this moment, the way Jake felt, the way he smelled.

  “I’ll call you,” he said and turned to walk back down the stairs, his arm lingering for a moment as he let go of my hand.

  “K.”

  I opened the door.

  Mattie and Calla practically knocked me over.

  “How was it?” Calla asked.

  “What did you guys do?” Mattie said at the same time.

  “Guys, guys. Can I get my coat off and sit down for a second?”

  They backed off a bit but followed on my heels as I fell onto the couch.

  “It. Was. Awesome!” I said, nearly squealing.

  “I knew it!” Calla said. “You’re so going to marry him.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “What did you do already?” Mattie said anxiously.

  “Well,” I started. “He has his own lake. Which we flew to.”

  Calla and Mattie’s eyes got wider.

  “And literally he flew. He piloted the plane.”

  “Really?” Calla said. “I didn’t know he could do that.” She had the strangest look on her face, like she was really worried that there might be something she didn’t know about Jake.

  “Yeah, me neither,” I said. “But he was awesome. He made me feel totally safe.”

  “Wow. Then what?” Mattie asked.

  “We went out on his boat and circled around the lake, which is how I found out that he owns the whole lake. And then we went for a romantic walk where he kissed me in this little clearing.”

  “Whoa, back up girl,” Calla said. “What do you mean he kissed you?”

  “What, you don’t know what a kiss is anymore?” I asked.

  “No. I remember. It’s just that, oh my God, Jake Hall kissed you?” she yelled.

  “Say it a little louder,” I said. “I don’t think the people on the top floor heard you.”

  Mattie was staring at me in silence. His mouth was hanging open and he looked like he might be in shock. He finally noticed that I was staring at him. “You are the luckiest girl in the world,” he said. “Can you even imagine how many girls would kill to be in your position?”

  “Well, that’s a lovely thought Mattie,” I said. “Make me paranoid that the whole city is going to be after me. Besides, it’s just one date.”

  “One date! One date?” Calla said. “You spent most of the day with Jake Hall! The paparazzi have been outside for hours you know. This is huge. Huge!”

  “But I don’t want it to be huge. I just want to go out on a simple date with a guy I really like.”

  “You really like him?” Calla said, smiling.

  I smiled back, almost giddy. “And not because he’s Jake Hall, this big movie star. Because he’s Jake Hall, sweet, caring, down to earth guy.”

  “And totally hot,” Mattie added.

  “Yeah, and totally hot,” I agreed.

  “What else did you guys do?” Mattie asked.

  “After our walk,” I said.

  “And the kiss,” Calla interrupted.

  I smiled. “We went back into his house and this chef guy was there. He made the most fabulous meal and we talked about practically everything, did you know his mother is almost as annoying as mine?”

  “It’s fate,” Calla said, hanging on my every word.

  “And then we flew home.”

  “Did he walk you up? I didn’t hear anything,” Calla said.

  “Yeah. And he kissed me again at the door. He’s such a gentleman.”

  “I told you we should have been taking turns looking out the peephole,” Mattie said giving Calla a glare.

  “Yeah, that’s what I need,” I said, “more people ogling at me all day.”

  “Are you going to go out again?” Calla asked.

  I shrugged. “I hope so. He said he’d call me.”

  “So the outfit was a hit then?” Mattie said.

  “Yes Mattie, the outfit was perfect.”

  “And the hair,” he reminded me.

  “Yes, and the hair.”

  “Excellent,” he said, obviously quite proud of himself.

  “Thanks again Mattie, I don’t know what I would have done without you through all this.”

  And I really didn’t. My confidence level would have been at about zero if I hadn’t had the clothes to help me along.

  “And you too Calla,” I said. “Thanks for being so supportive. Especially since I know you were hoping to win the lotto.”

  Calla shrugged. “I still can’t believe someone I know won,” she said. But the look on her face said more than that. I could tell she was a little sad.

  “Well, I’d better get home,” Mattie said. “All those Makeover Margaritas have done me in.”

  As he walked out the door, I turned to Calla. “Geez, how many margaritas did you guys have?”

  “Um, we’ve pretty much been drinking since you left.”

  “Holy,” I said. “I hope you guys ate something.”

  “Yeah, we were lazy so we ordered a pizza.”

  I nodded. “Well, I think I’m going to head to bed. It’s been a long day.” It certainly didn’t seem like the trip to the spa had only been that morning.

  “Me too. Too much booze,” Calla said and followed me down the hall. “Good night.”

  “Good night.”

  Just before I fell asleep, I knew it was time for another entry in the Disaster Diary. I couldn’t have myself floating this high, and not even try to come back down to reality.

  Dear Disaster Diary,

  Alarm went off late that morning, so I was in a total rush. I showered as fast as I could and threw on some clothes straight out of the dryer. They were a little wrinkled, but I they were good passable. I threw them on and ran out the door.

  I arrived at school just as the final bell was ringing. I got to homeroom and everything was normal. I made my way to the science lab. The class was completely boring and I was fiddling with my pencil, which inevitably ended up falling off my desk. I reached down to find it, only I found more than I bargained for. A pair of my underwear were laying there on the floor of the science lab! The must have stuck to the inside of my pants in the dryer!

  I tried to hide them with my feet, but there was no way I could hide them without making some sort of large motion. I bent down and quickly threw them inside my binder only to look up and find at least four people staring right at me.

  The next morning when I woke up, I felt like the date with Jake had all been a dream. I spent a few minutes lying there trying
to convince myself that it had actually happened.

  “Hey,” Calla said when I came out of my room.

  “Wow,” I said. “You’re up already.”

  “Yeah. I couldn’t sleep anymore. My stomach is too barfy. Figured I could use some coffee.”

  “Yes! There’s coffee?”

  “Yup. And a newspaper.”

  I stopped in my tracks and let out a groan. “Do I even want to see it?”

  “Um, I doubt it.”

  I decided I’d better get my coffee before even thinking about looking at that paper. I came back out and sat with Calla.

  “Okay, lay it on me.”

  She handed me the entertainment section. The headline said, ‘Jake and Josie Get Cozy: Jr. Copywriter Takes Over Lead In Bridesmaid Race.’ The picture was of me leaning my head on Jake, asleep. My mouth was hanging open. It was decidedly not pretty.

  I groaned again. “What? It’s a race now?”

  “I guess,” Calla said. “Oh, and by the way, your mother’s already called and left four messages.”

  I sighed. The article went on to explain how I’d come to win the date with Jake and mentioned how we were gone for several hours.

  Further down there was a quote from ‘the previous leader,’ Rebecca Singleton. “If she thinks she’s ahead because she just happened to ‘win’ a date with Jake, she is sorely mistaken,” it said.

  There was a much smaller picture at the bottom of the article showing Jake leaving my apartment the night before. Of course there was speculation as to what might have happened during the ‘several minutes inside the building.’

  “God, what is with people? Is this really that interesting?” I said.

  “Well, I may be a little biased, but I have to admit I find it quite intriguing,” Calla said.

  The phone rang.

  Crap. Was I ready to face my mother yet?

  “Maybe you should just get it over with,” Calla said.

  I nodded and took a deep breath.

  “Hello?”

  “Josephine McMaster, I can not believe you didn’t tell me about your date!” my mother said.

  “Hi to you too, Mom.”

  “And what’s worse is that picture of you in the paper! Good Lord, don’t you close your mouth when you sleep?”

  “I guess not.”

  “Well for God’s sake, start.”

  “Mom, I’m sleeping, I have no control over it.”

  “Well, it was quite the scene at the club this morning. Imagine my embarrassment when all the ladies were congratulating me, and I had absolutely no idea what for. I could have died.”

  “I’m sure it wasn’t all that bad, mother,” I said. “After all, your daughter was out on a date with a movie star. Didn’t that count for something?”

  “Well yes, but you should have seen it. They were all waiting there like vultures, nudging each other so they could be the first to tell me the news. I had to pretend I’d known all about it already, but I’m sure my face when I saw the paper must have given me away. Not to mention that that ugly apartment building of yours was shown too.”

  “My apartment is fine, Mom,” I said. “Jake even liked it.”

  “I’m sure he was just trying to be nice dear.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Well anyway, I just wanted to phone you to congratulate you on your progress, dear.”

  “That was congratulating me?”

  “Well yes. Of course dear. Thank goodness for small miracles.”

  “Again. Thanks,” I said.

  “Call me when you would like to get together for brunch again dear,” she said.

  “Yeah. Sure. Bye Mom.”

  “Goodbye dear.”

  “That sounded like a fun conversation,” Calla said.

  “Yes. She’s very disappointed that I sleep with my mouth open and thinks it’s a miracle that I got a date with Jake Hall.”

  “Well,” Calla said. “That’s what mother’s are for. Sheesh.”

  The phone rang again.

  “If that is her again, I swear to God, I will drive out to the suburbs and strangle her right now!” I said.

  Calla thought it was best that she answer the phone this time.

  “Hello?”

  A few seconds later she handed the phone to me.

  Who is it? I mouthed to Calla.

  She shrugged.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey Josie, it’s Jennifer.”

  “Oh, hey Jennifer,” I said, glad to hear her voice.

  “So I saw the paper this morning,” she said.

  “Yeah. This is turning into a hell of a circus. Apparently the paparazzi were staking out my house most of the night.”

  “Sick. I have to admit, I feel almost as bad for you as I do jealous.”

  I laughed, hoping she was kidding.

  “I’m in your neighborhood doing a little shopping. Did you want to grab a cup of coffee or something?

  “Sure,” I said. “I can meet you in about a half hour. There’s this great little coffee shop just down the street from me.”

  I gave her directions to the coffee shop and hurried to get ready. I definitely needed to talk to someone who’d at least have a small chance at understanding what I was going through.

  Downstairs, there were still a few paparazzi stragglers.

  Do these guys seriously not have anything better to do? I thought. I hurried down the street, photographers in tow.

  “Hey,” I said, spotting Jennifer and sitting down.

  “I see you have company,” she said nodding out the window.

  I rolled my eyes. “Can you believe it? It’s so annoying.”

  “Speaking of the press,” she said. “I heard rumblings that Rebecca is trying to start a whole sabotage campaign against you.”

  “What? Really?”

  “She is so jealous that you’re getting more press time than her.”

  “But I don’t even want it,” I said.

  “I know, but she’s got her panties all in a bunch, and I seriously think it has very little to do with Jake, and a whole lot to do with publicity.”

  “God. I would give anything not to be followed by the press again. Oh what I simple life I used to lead.”

  Jennifer giggled. “It is surreal.”

  I nodded. “So do you have any other information about this sabotage project?” I asked, only mildly curious.

  I couldn’t imagine what kind of harm Rebecca could really do. After all, it wasn’t like I’d led a very scandalous life thus far. Although I made a mental note to keep my guard up, I wasn’t about to put it past Rebecca to just make something up.

  “No. Nothing. But I think she might be trying to recruit Bobbi Lynne to help.”

  “Really? I’m surprised that Bobbi Lynne would go along with that,” I said.

  Jennifer shrugged. “I guess she wants Jake too. But don’t worry, you and I can have each other’s backs, okay?”

  “Thanks Jennifer. I don’t know how I would get through this without you.”

  She nodded. “Me either.”

  ~ 11 ~

  Dear Bridesmaids,

  I have a very exciting update for you today. The first fitting for your dresses is fast approaching! I hope you will all agree with me that they are the absolute most fabuloso dresses ever to have adorned this earth. Please make sure you are at your appointments promptly at the stated time, as the store is making a special effort to fit you all in on such short notice. The times are attached as an Outlook file to make it easier to integrate into your calendars.

  Your Bride,

  Emma VanHorn

  I clicked into the attachment and saw that my appointment was tomorrow. Crap. I would barely be able to get there in time after work. And I absolutely, positively could not justify missing any more work over this ‘silly wedding thing’ as my boss called it. He was as about as impressed with my new Bridesmaid status as he was with the shampoo I used.

  If only my new celebrity stat
us were actually good for something, it might not be so bad.

  “Hey,” Mattie peeked into my cubicle.

  “Hey,” I said.

  “I thought I heard email being opened. Any messages from the stud?”

  “No. But I do have a new one from Emma.”

  “Ooh, let me see,” he said scurrying into the room, taking his usual place, looming behind my right shoulder.

  “Oh my gosh, the Bridesmaid dresses! I almost forgot you’d get to wear another fabulous dress. Just imagine, you will be forever captured in the wedding pictures!”

  “Exactly,” I said. “That’s why I am positive that it’s going to be some sort of hideous excuse for a dress.”

  “Oh, shush. You know that Emma VanHorn has impeccable taste.”

  I nodded. “And I also know that she’s not going to want any of the attention drawn away from her on her wedding day.”

  “Of course Emma is going to want to look better than her Bridesmaids, but she’s also not going to ruin her fashion integrity by choosing something hideous,” Mattie said.

  “I guess we’ll see tomorrow, won’t we?”

  Mattie gasped. “Oh my God, can I come with you?”

  “I hadn’t really meant the ‘we’ as in we’ll both go see, but I probably would need a little moral support. If the dress was hideous, I was going to need somebody there to remind me why I was doing this in the first place. Wait, why am I doing this in the first place?” I asked.

  “Because you are fabulous and Jake Hall is in the middle of falling madly in love with you.”

  “No, that’s not it.”

  “Oh right,” Mattie said looking rather frustrated with me. “Your silly little trip to Europe.”

  “Yes. That’s right. There is a real, concrete reason. Not some head in the clouds movie star fairy tale.”

  He left the room without arguing though the look on his face said that he did not agree with me.

  # # #

  That night Calla and I decided a quiet night in was on the menu along with some Chinese and a little stargazing on ‘Entertainment News.’

  I happily munched my Chow Mein.