Forever We Fall

by Chloe Walsh

  “What about Lee?” I asked, forcing myself to stay focused. “How many times can they call her to testify?” I frowned deeply. “I don’t want her up there, Kelsie.”

  “Hopefully just the one day,” Kelsie replied as she opened her legs for a moment before crossing them once more. “And then you’ll all be free to carry on with your lives.”

  “What about the letters?” I whispered. Something was seriously fucking bothering me about those letters and I couldn’t put my finger on it. Doubt was creeping into my heart. All those letters she’d sent me, begging me to come see her, that she had something to tell me, something about a plan . . . I was starting to wonder if I’d made a mistake in not hearing her out. “Are they going to ask me about the letters?”

  Sighing deeply, Kelsie patted my legs and smiled. “The letters are our little secret . . .” Her voice trailed off as she narrowed her eyes at something behind my head.

  Turning in my chair, I smirked when my eyes landed on Lee, who was kneeling on the floor with her sexy, jean-covered ass sticking up in the air. “Sorry,” she apologized, red-faced, as she gestured to Hope who was kicking around on a fold-up changing mat. “She’s teething at the moment. Her tummy’s a little upset . . .”

  “There’s a restroom just down the hall,” Kelsie growled, scrunching her nose up at the smell. Jesus, I hadn’t even noticed the smell until now. I was probably immune. “I would prefer if my office wasn’t used as a nursery,” she added cattily and my hackles rose.

  “Oh.” Lee blushed crimson. “I’m sorry.” Climbing to her feet, she hoisted Hope into her arms and rushed to the door. “Kyle, I’ll wait for you outside,” Lee said quietly.

  “Lee, hang on, baby,” I called out, but she had already slipped out the door, closing it quietly behind her.

  Turning my head around, I glared at Kelsie. “What’s the problem here, Kelsie?” I asked coldly. “Is it my kid? Do you have a problem with my daughter?”

  Shaking my head in disgust, I jerked out of my chair and glowered down at her. “If you work for me then you work for them. It’s a package deal, sweetheart,—dirty diapers included. If you have a problem with my family then you better tell me now.”

  “No, Mr. Carter,” she whispered, eyes wide and tear-filled. Dammit, not another crier . . .”Of course I don’t,” she rambled on quickly. “She’s a lovely little girl—as is Miss Bennett.” Blushing furiously she added, “I apologize if I was abrupt. I have no experience with children or their mechanics.”

  “Jesus, don’t start crying,” I groaned, patting her on the shoulder awkwardly, feeling like a tool for making yet another woman cry. Jesus, I needed to rein it in. My head was all over the place lately. Every damn thing was getting on top of me and I needed to get a handle on my temper. “Sorry,” I muttered. “I’m . . . uh, a little on edge lately.”

  “Well, I’m always here to listen if you need to talk, Mr. Carter,” she replied softly as she patted my arm. “As your legal advisor and as your friend.”

  “Thanks,” I said as enthusiastically as I could. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “Lee, you’re overreacting,” Kyle growled as he walked through the foyer of the Henderson Hotel, with Hope resting on his hip and my body welded to his side. “Yeah, I get your point about the whole diaper thing, but as for the rest of it? She was just doing her job.” Turning the corner of the corridor, he placed a possessive hand on my lower back as he opened the door of his office and led me inside. “She’s a damn good lawyer, baby.”

  “Oh, I’m sure she’s very thorough and attentive,” I muttered through clenched teeth.

  Kyle had been acting strange for a couple of days and with Derek still in Idaho I was struggling to break through his concrete walls. I knew he was exhausted and worried about literally everything, but I couldn’t let this crap with Kelsie slide. We’d just come from Kyle’s attorney’s office and I was still simmering with anger. I hadn’t noticed it until today, but Kelsie Mayfield definitely had an interest in my fiancé that went above and beyond her professional duties. Anger at her blatant attempt of flirting with Kyle was bubbling inside of me. She needed to back the heck off and he needed to open his eyes and see that woman for what she truly was. A manipulator.

  “Is she so devoted to her other clients?” I tossed out cattily. “I thought she was supposed to talk us through the procedure of the trial, Kyle, not hang on your arm and bat her eyes.” Exhaling harshly I added, “Which as far as I remember used to be covered with glasses. I guess she forgot to put those on this morning—along with the rest of her clothes.” The memory of Kelsie crossing and uncrossing her barely clad legs entered my mind and all the blood in my body rushed to my face. If I had noticed the suspender clips and thigh high stockings she wore then so had Kyle . . .

  “She wasn’t hanging on my arm,” Kyle said in weary tone as he settled behind his desk with Hope in his arms. “And I pay her to be thorough and attentive.”

  “Obviously, you don’t pay her enough,” I growled as I stalked over and sank down on a chair at his desk. “Otherwise she’d able to afford clothes that covered her body.” In the forty-five minutes I’d sat watching that woman coo and fuss over Kyle, I’d also copped at least five unwanted flashes of her breasts. Her perky—up to her freaking chin, child-less—breasts. “Has she ever heard of a bra?” I muttered petulantly as anxiety and jealously swirled inside of me. “Or a shirt with buttons?”

  “Are you jealous?” Shaking his head, he grinned broadly. “You’re actually jealous of her?”

  “I’m not jealous,” I lied. “I’m insulted with her underhanded provocative tactics.” Folding my arms over my chest, I glared at his stupid smirking face. “She was making a play for you, Kyle. Right in front of me. Right in front of your daughter.”

  “No, she wasn’t,” he scoffed, dismissing me with a flick of his wrist. “Lee, she wasn’t making a play for me. She was doing her job. You’re being irrational, baby.”

  “Yes, she was, Kyle,” I seethed. “I know what I saw. She wants you.” I’ve seen that look before . . .

  Bouncing Hope on his knees, Kyle continued to grin at me with fond amusement glittering in his eyes. “Lee, you have nothing to worry about,” he said gently. “I haven’t looked at another woman since the night we met.”

  “Don’t, Kyle,” I mumbled, pressing my fingers against my temples. “Don’t say things that aren’t true.” I knew Kyle was faithful now, but telling me he hadn’t looked at another woman since we met was a lie. The painful memories of his many other women crashed through my mind like a cannonball.

  It wasn’t his fault he attracted the female sex like bees to honey, and I wasn’t trying to be clingy or hurt him by bringing this up, but I was scared to death. That woman wanted my fiancé and had made no qualms about it . . .

  The months I’d spent using a pillow to cover my ears while he entertained those other women in the bedroom next door to mine penetrated my mind and I cringed. The first six months I’d been with him had been hell on earth for me. The very reason we had been in an attorney’s office in the first place was to talk about a woman whose only ambition in life was to have him.

  “That was a long fucking time ago and you know it,” Kyle hissed, stirring me from my brooding thoughts. Sighing heavily, he looked at a complete loss as he shook his head. “I can’t believe you’re throwing it back in my face.”

  “I’m not, Kyle, and I don’t want to fight with you,” I replied quietly as I rubbed the skin over my heart. “Just be careful around her.” That’s all I wanted him to do. “You’re keeping things to yourself again,” I added softly. “You seem more vulnerable than usual. I just need you to be careful, that’s all.”

  “You don’t trust me,” he said flatly.

  When I took longer than three seconds to answer him, Kyle jerked out of his chair and strode over to the playpen in the far corner of his office before gently setting Hope down. “After everything we’ve been th
rough,” he mused in a thoughtful tone, stroking Hope’s curls. Straightening his spine he turned to face me. “You still don’t fucking trust me.”

  “Yes, I do, Kyle,” I said honestly and calmly. I didn’t want to fight with him—things were tense enough without us being at each other’s throats. “It’s her I don’t trust.”

  Stalking over to his desk, Kyle leaned against it and fixed his glare on me. “Is that why you keep avoiding setting a date?” he asked, his voice menacingly calm. “You won’t marry me because you think I’m gonna cheat on you?”

  “What are you talking about?” I demanded, losing patience. “How does us getting married have anything to do with your attorney flirting with you?”

  “Prove it,” he taunted, ignoring my question.

  “Prove what?” I asked with a sigh. “Why in god’s name are you behaving like this?”

  “Set a date. Prove you trust me,” he taunted in a derisive tone of voice. “Do what you promised you’d do and marry me.” Raising his brow, he sneered down at me. “Or are you gonna keep leading me on until we’re eighty?”

  Shaking my head, I clasped my hands together and inhaled a steadying breath. “You’re obviously looking for an argument, Kyle,” I said quietly. “I’m not taking the bait. This conversation is over. We’ll talk about it when you’re civil.”

  “What’s wrong, princess?” he asked with a smirk. “Don’t you trust me enough to marry me?”

  “Why are you being like this?” I demanded. “Why are we fighting?”

  “Why are you being like this?” he shot back, furious. “And I’m not sure . . .”

  The soft knock on the door came as huge relief to me, breaking the heated stare-down that had developed between us, but my relief was short-lived when I turned around and saw the familiar blonde head.

  I groaned internally when Mike Henderson sauntered into Kyle’s office, smiling broadly. “I thought I saw you in reception earlier,” he said to Kyle. “Twice in one week?”

  “Someone has to check up on your stupid ass,” Kyle shot back, teasingly. Straightening his back, he flashed Mike a friendly grin, masking his fury effortlessly. “I see the place in still standing,” he said with a smirk. “And I’ve been through the books. Good job, man. I’m impressed.”

  I sat in a state of bewilderment as the pair chatted openly. Two years ago, I never would have thought Kyle and Mike could be civil to one another, let alone joking and teasing. Time definitely seemed to be a healer for the half-brothers.

  “Thanks Kyle.” Mike beamed with pride, clearly basking in the praise from his older brother. Kyle didn’t hand out compliments too often and I guessed that’s what made his simple words of praise even more valuable to Mike.

  “Hello Lee,” Mike said, addressing me with a small inclination of his head.

  “Mike.” I forced myself to smile politely in return, the memory of Derek’s skeletal frame and heartbroken grief still fresh in my mind, rebuking me from initiating any further pleasantries.

  “Any word from . . . Linda?” Kyle asked, breaking the awkward silence, his tone suddenly anxious.

  “Nothing, man, sorry,” Mike mumbled and I felt my heart break for Kyle. His eyes darkened and clouded over, his frame sagged, and I felt a surge of anger towards Linda Stone. As annoyed as I was with Kyle right now, I felt the strongest urge to wrap my arms around him and coo and fuss. The angry tension wafting off him and the heat in his eyes were the reasons I stayed securely in my seat.

  “Dad stopped by,” Mike added in a serious tone, causing Kyle to stiffen. Oh god, it just keeps getting better and better . . . I closed my eyes, feeling a headache coming on. “Twice last week,” Mike added quietly. “And once this morning. I sent him packing, Kyle.”

  “And what did dear old daddy want?” Kyle spat, his knuckles turning white from the grip he had on the desk.

  “I’m going to go for a walk,” I mumbled as I stood up quickly. My stress levels were through the roof and the hostility in the room was becoming too much. Walking over to the playpen, I lifted Hope into my arms before making my way to the door.

  “You’re not going anywhere,” Kyle ordered. “Sit down, Lee.”

  “Don’t talk to me like I’m a dog, Kyle,” I warned. “I won’t take it.”

  “Fine. You either sit here or you go upstairs and sit in the suite,” he shot back. “Make your choice, sweetheart.”

  “You can be a real asshole sometimes,” I whispered, feeling completely debased.

  “An asshole that keeps you alive,” he shot back, tossing our old room key at me. “Upstairs. Now.”

  “You’re an asshole,” Mike declared in a disgusted tone.

  “I know,” I muttered as I stormed over to my desk and sank down on my chair. Scratching my head in confusion I tried to piece together the last few days of my life. “I have no idea why I just did that,” I confessed. Why the fuck had I picked a fight with Lee of all people? Jesus . . .

  I shook my head in disgust with myself. I was more rattled than I’d thought. Jimmy’s phone call the other day had riled me and Cindy’s visit on top of that had shaken me up. The fact that she refused to give a fucking inch with regards to Linda’s whereabouts was driving me insane. Goddammit, what the hell did they think I was going to do to the woman. All I wanted was to see her for myself—to put to rest the niggling worry in the pit of my stomach that was telling me something was wrong.

  “I do,” Mike replied as he took the chair opposite me. “You did it because you’re an asshole.” Shaking his head in disgust, he folded his arms across his chest and glared at me. “She’s been through hell and back and you speak to her like that? You are an assho . . .”

  “Alright,” I warned. “I think we’ve established what I am.”

  “Why were you fighting?” he asked quietly. “Or am I allowed to ask?”

  I stared at Mike for a moment, weighing up my options. Fuck it . . .”She thinks our lawyer made a play for me,” I mumbled, deciding to lay it out there. I was getting pretty tired of holding everything inside. Linda had always been my confidante—the one person in my life who I could lay all my shit bare to and know she could handle it. Without her to talk to I was drowning fast. Derek was still in Idaho—and recovering from a depression so deep it nearly killed him—and Lee . . . well, I’d just messed that right up.

  “And was she making a play for you?” Mike asked levelly. “Lee’s not the type of girl to overreact about something like this,” he added. “Something must have happened that touched a nerve for her.”

  “I don’t know, Mike,” I groaned. “I don’t pay attention half the time. Maybe Kelsie was, but I wasn’t biting.” Jerking out of my chair, I paced the floor aimlessly as I tried to figure out why I’d been such a tool to Lee. “I’m so goddamn confused lately,” I confessed to my brother. “I don’t like feeling like this, Mike.”

  “Like what, Kyle?” he probed gently.

  “Like there’s something going on that I should know about, but don’t,” I admitted. “Something big is going on with Linda and I’m being kept in the dark and . . . Rachel,” I choked out. “She sent me these weird letters for months before the trial.” Turning around to face Mike, I sighed heavily before whispering, “I have no idea why, Mike, but I feel like I’m overlooking something. Something vitally important.”

  “Is there anything else?” he asked.

  I rolled my eyes at the stupidity of his question. “What do you think, man?” I pulled at my tie, freeing it from where it was choking my neck. “I have a list as long as your arm of problems.”

  “Kyle,” he said in a coaxing tone as he stood up and walked towards me. “Don’t take me the wrong way on this, but you’ve been under a lot of pressure. Maybe you need to take a break? A holiday or something.” Patting my shoulder, Mike’s brows creased in concern. “Dammit, you’re shaking like a leaf,” he hissed. “Your whole body is trembling, Kyle.” Clamping his hands on my shoulders he sho
ved me down on my chair.

  “I took it out on her.” My shoulders sagged and I dropped my head in my hands. “I shouldn’t have taken my shit out on her.” What I should have done was told Lee about Cindy’s visit, but I couldn’t work up the nerve. She would worry and I’d given her plenty reason to in the past. Dammit . . .

  “Listen, Kyle, you’ve been under a hell of a lot of pressure for a very long time,” Mike said slowly. “And you’ve been dealing with everybody else’s problems, on top of your own.” He stroked his bottom lip as he stared at me. “You’re going to crash and burn if you don’t take a breather. Have some fun, man. You’re only twenty-three-years-old. “

  My phone vibrated in my pocket and I slid it out. “I don’t have time for fun, Mike,” I grumbled as I unlocked the screen and read the text.

  “I have to go,” I whispered as I shoved my phone back in my pocket and jumped to my feet, the message I’d received was burning, tearing through my heart like a goddamn freight train.

  Hospitals freaked me out.

  Every time I stepped foot inside the doors of one, my body broke into a cold sweat.

  That’s the way I looked when I found Linda inside one of the white clinical treatment rooms.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” I whispered, as I stood frozen in the doorway of her hospital room, every muscle in my body locked up in fear—in pure fucking terror. Every instinct in body wanted to bolt, run the fuck away from this room. These rooms were never a good thing. It was built into human beings: a self-preservation warning.

  These rooms were bad.

  “So, you found me,” Linda rasped as she lay curled up in a ball on her bed. “Kind of figured you wouldn’t let it go, kiddo . . .” She started wheezing and held her hand to her mouth. “You’re just like your grandfather.” She coughed again and I flinched.

  She wore no cover-up and my stomach dropped into my ass. She looked so worn out. Her eyes had the darkest shadows underneath them. Her hair was gone.