Amy Sumida - Perchance To Die (The Godhunter Book 12)

by Unknown

  I almost giggled but the way she stared at me left no room for merriment. I quickly directed my gaze back to Emma's train, I really didn't want to step on it like I'd done with my mother's when I was a teenager. Yeah, that's right, I had the honor of being my mom's only bridesmaid when she was getting married. Then I accidentally stepped on my mom's train when she was walking up to the altar... and it ripped. I was haunted by that image for years.

  Then something occurred to me, maybe I wasn't the only one haunted by my mistakes. I glanced back at Hel. Yep, Trevor's aunt was now staring at him possessively and with a creepy intensity that I didn't want to ponder. I guess she still hadn't gotten over how I helped Trevor escape Niflheim... and her strange potentially incestuous clutches.

  Finally, we were standing before Fenrir and Loki. Trevor gave Emma's hand to Fenrir and stepped back, offering me his arm. I took it and we positioned ourselves to the left of the couple. I gave Emma an encouraging smile and tried not to fidget with the torque. At least I hadn't torn her dress. First disaster averted.

  “Welcome everyone,” Loki started. “As your Valdyr is otherwise engaged, I've offered my services for performing this ceremony.” The crowd chuckled a bit. “It's with great happiness and honor that I join my son to this woman in the magical bond of the Froekn. May the Moon ever smile upon you, may your path lay clear and unbroken, and may your happiness in each other grow with each passing day.”

  Then Fenrir took over. It wasn't like he needed direction after all, he'd done the ceremony enough to know it by heart, but this would be the first time he said the words for himself. I felt a flutter of delight from the butterflies of my love magic.

  “I will treasure your life above my own,” Fenrir's deep rumble rolled across the gathering, “and stop the blade meant for your heart with my own body.”

  “Your death would be my death,” Emma said her lines in a confident voice, just as strong as Fenrir's. “I release you from your vow and bid you instead of dying, to live for me.”

  “So be it,” Fenrir nodded and shocked everyone by tearing up. “I will put your needs above my own. I will go hungry so that you may eat.”

  “Your hunger would turn the food to ash in my mouth,” Emma smiled gently up at Fenrir. “I release you from your vow and bid you instead to keep your body nourished for me.”

  “So be it,” Fenrir swallowed hard. “I will love you above all others, including myself, without conditions or expectations.”

  “I do not desire blind love. I release you from your vow and bid you instead to love yourself first, so that the love you give to me is strong and pure.”

  “So be it,” Fenrir was barely able to get the last part out, he was so choked up. He took a deep breath to compose himself and held out a ring to Emma. “Will you accept me as I am,” he stopped and closed his eyes briefly. I nearly lost it then, knowing that this question meant the most to him. “And wear this symbol to let all know of our commitment to each other?”

  “Yes, I will,” Emma kept her control but her lips were trembling. She held her hand out and he slid the ring on her finger.

  The crowd erupted into cheers and it took a long while for them to quiet enough that Emma could repeat her vows to Fenrir. When Emma had finished and the crowd had cheered and quieted once more, Loki laid a hand on Emma and Fenrir's shoulders.

  “Three vows made and three refused. Freedom offered and thrice rejected. You are bound now by the powers of the Moon and the magic of the Froekn. Cleave one to the other for only together will you survive eternity. So shall it be!”

  Magic shifted over the couple in a wild rush, I felt the tingles of it along my skin as the Binding settled into place. Emma may not have been a Froekn, and she still wouldn't be able to shift into a wolf, but she was family now and the magic recognized her as one of ours.

  “The Froekn has a new Rouva,” Loki continued. “Will the old Rouva present herself to relinquish her torque?”

  I stepped forward and smiled at them both. I was overjoyed that they were finally bound together and my love magic was pretty thrilled to see the completion of its prediction as well. I lifted the torque with its wolf head tips and placed it around Emma's neck.

  “I freely give up the torque,” I said the words they'd made me memorize, “and bare my neck with respect to the new Rouva.”

  Emma leaned forward and placed a kiss on my throat. The Froekn cheered, though the rest of the crowd was a little confused. I didn't blame them, it was kind of weird but it was a wolf thing. Something about submission to the new alpha, so who was I to complain?

  “And I offer one more present to the couple,” I smiled at the surprise in Fenrir's face. “The day we first met, I showed you a glimpse of the future, of the woman you were meant to love. It's with profound happiness that I stand before you two and see you bound together, and it's with thoughts of that happiness that I offer you a blessing,” I held my hands out to them and they placed their hands in mine immediately. I loved them for that, for their instant trust in me. I called on my love magic and felt it come fluttering to life inside me. I let it flow down my arms and into them, Emma's eyes going wide when it hit. “Love has united you already but now the magic of love will protect what you've forged. You will never lose that lightness of spirit that comes with new love, the butterflies in your belly and the magic of that first kiss. It will always be there for you, bubbling inside your hearts, that you shall never lose sight of what it means to have found a love as great as yours. I offer you this blessing, as is my right as the Goddess of Love. Will you accept it?”

  “We will,” Fenrir had finally got his emotions under control but now Emma was crying.

  “We will,” she wiped at her tears.

  The magic joined us all briefly, shining brightly inside them, and then it rushed back home to me. They both stepped forward and hugged me before I backed away and found Trevor waiting behind me. His eyes shone with unshed tears as he took my hand and led me to our places on the left. He kissed my cheek and leaned his forehead to mine. I felt my wolf lift up beneath my skin to nuzzle against him, accepting the love and gratitude he offered.

  I looked back to see Fenrir lean slowly down to Emma and kiss her to the roar of shouting Froekn, Intare, and gods. Then he picked her up and carried her off into the dark forest. Wild, beautiful, and short, you gotta love a werewolf wedding.

  We all headed back up to the house, where the reception was being held. By the time I got up there, the party had already started, with loud music and hellbrew aplenty. My lions were raring to go and the wolves were howling, while the gods watched it all with the satisfied air of ones who were properly entertained.

  I was talking to Blue, telling him about the dogs in Sochi and asking him to contact Sarama, when I saw Thor. He didn't look so good, paler than usual and distraught. I followed his gaze and saw Griffin talking to a couple of Froekn women. My stomach lurched but I pushed away my hurt. He was back, this was what I'd wanted, and hadn't I tempted fate by saying I didn't care what happened as long as Odin came back? I wouldn't play the hypocrite now by getting angry.

  “I'll talk to you later, Blue,” I said distractedly. “I think I need to go take care of something.”

  “Of course,” Blue nodded. “I'll see to it that Sarama is notified about the dogs.”

  “Thanks.”

  I headed toward Thor. He was obviously upset and he, unlike myself, hadn't signed on for this. He deserved some comfort and if I happened to comfort myself along with him, well I apologize for being a selfish brat.

  “Thor?” I put a hand on his arm and he flinched, looking down at me with the air of a man enveloped in his own musings.

  “Vervain,” he whispered and started to shake. “He's back but he's not him... and I don't like the man he's become.”

  “Come on,” I pulled him into the hall and then into the library. With the shutting of the door came a comforting quiet and he sighed and sank down into one of the many leather couches spread around th
e room. I sat beside him. “I know he's not himself yet but I have faith that his memory will return one day.”

  “What if it doesn't?” Thor looked like a lost little boy. I guess no matter how powerful you are, your father will always make you feel like a child.

  “If it doesn't return,” I rubbed his back, “then we'll be satisfied that he's here with us, even if he doesn't know who he is.”

  “I want Odin back,” he said softly. “This infant with the careless attitude and angry stare is not my father.”

  “He is, he's just confused.”

  “Vervain,” Thor shook his head and started to cry. He fell into my lap, a big heap of muscles that I had to lift my arms into weird angles to hold.

  I felt his arms go around me, the sharp, salty, ozone scent of him filling my nose, and I sighed. I was glad Thor felt comfortable enough with me that he could hug me again but the familiarity of the hug had me feeling a bit awkward. I missed Thor, I would always miss Thor, and a part of me would always love him but it was a distant piece of my heart, hidden by greater loves and stronger ties. That small part of me glowed with pleasure while the rest of me cringed in dismay.

  Just as I started to pull away, the door opened and my first thought was that it was Trevor come looking for me. I was loathe to share Thor's pain with Trevor but my alpha would need an explanation for this and it had to be done. But it wasn't Trevor standing in the doorway, it was Griffin. He had his hand on the handle and his mouth was hanging open.

  “Isn't he supposed to be my son?” Griffin hurled the accusation at me like he'd caught us mid-coitus. “This is just disgusting.” He turned and left, muttering about lying women who couldn't be satisfied with four lovers.

  I gaped at Thor and he stared at me with wide eyes. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Griffin had totally misconstrued the situation but Thor and I had once been an item and I had the same reaction when I discovered my past with Odin. It was kind of unsettling. The main reason for laughter instead of tears though, the reason I didn't go running after Griffin trying to explain, was that he'd come looking for me. Griffin must have seen me leave with Thor and he'd come to stop whatever was about to happen. A man who didn't care about me wouldn't have bothered.

  “Well,” I huffed a shaky laugh. “I guess he's pissed.”

  Thor's face cleared and then he began to smile. “That was the most Odin behavior I've seen out of him so far. Maybe you're right, Vervain. Maybe he will remember.”

  “I hope so,” I looked out the open door. “Cause I really don't want to have to explain our past relationship to Griffin.”

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  When we all got back to Pride Palace, I found Griffin waiting for me again. This time he was sitting on the stairs with a bag at his feet. The others saw him and assessed the situation as quickly as I had. They left in a hurry, climbing the stairs towards their rooms instead of waiting for the elevator. Trevor and Kirill left last, getting into the elevator only after I nodded to them.

  “You're leaving?” I finally went over to Griffin.

  “Yes.”

  “Where you gonna go?”

  “I don't know but I can't be here any longer.”

  “Okay.”

  “You're not going to try and stop me?” He looked a little surprised and maybe even a little disappointed.

  “You keep forgetting that our situations were reversed once,” I sat down on the stairs next to him. “I was the one who couldn't remember you. You were patient with me so how can I be anything less with you? If you want to leave, you can, you're not a prisoner here, but why don't you move into my house in Hawaii? You could start working at Trevor's club if you want, it's not too far from the house. Earn a little money, start making a new life for yourself. You can even use my car, if you can remember how to drive.”

  “I think I'll stick to tracing for now,” he slid his eyes over to me. “You'd really let me stay in your house, no strings attached?”

  “Whether you remember or not, you're Odin. You're not just some stranger,” I sighed. “If you need anything I have, it's yours, just ask. You can stay at the house for as long as you need to. I might need to come by occasionally to pick up some things but I've been spending most of my time here anyway. So you might as well use it. Get your head cleared and decide what you want to do. It's up to you. I'll be here if you need to talk or if you need help with anything, okay?”

  “Okay,” he nodded. “Thank you, Vervain.”

  “You're welcome.”

  “Were you really about to sleep with Thor?”

  “No,” I sighed. “I was comforting him because he was upset.”

  “Upset about what?”

  “You. The relationship between Odin and Thor was strained for awhile. They were just getting back on the right track when Odin died. It's been hard on Thor, having you back and yet further away than ever.” I stood while he gaped at me. “I'll go get the house keys and take you down to Kaneohe.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  “It's mayhem, absolute mayhem,” Torrent exclaimed as he came into the bedroom.

  I was curled up between Trevor and Kirill on our couch, watching TV with them. We all looked up as Torr walked in, Kirill shutting off the TV with a click of the remote.

  “What's mayhem?” Trevor asked.

  “In Vermont,” Torr plopped down into a chair next to us and rubbed a hand over his face. He was wearing a black shirt with white lettering. It read: I am the Matrix. “Those mutants of Tawiskaron's are attacking people in the woods. The humans think they're animal attacks so they sent out hunters. The mutants then led the hunters in a merry chase and tricked them into firing on each other. This has happened twice already and the only reason it hasn't happened a third time is that the hunters are beginning to get too scared to go into the woods.”

  “Mutants are tricking hunters into firing on one another?” I frowned. “They didn't seem that bright.”

  “They're mutants, not zombies,” Torrent leaned forward in his chair. “Plus, I think Tawiskaron is controlling them like puppets. This has the stench of puppet master all over it.”

  “Puppet master stench? I don't think I'm familiar with that one.” I lifted a brow at Kirill but he just shrugged. “Is it kind of like varnish or more of a cotton and wood odor?”

  “Vervain, are you listening to me?” Torrent whined.

  “Yes, of course,” I sat up straighter. “Did you tell Teharon?”

  “Not yet, I just found out.” he worried at his lip. “I've been keeping an eye on the Inter Realm and I just spotted the news.”

  “Okay, I'll go call Teharon and let him know that his brother has begun to implement his plans and it appears that those plans are to use his mutants to get humans to fire guns on each other.” I stood up. “It's unique, I'll give him that.”

  “Somehow I doubt that he's going to stop at a bunch of hunting accidents,” Trevor observed dryly.

  “No, I'm sure you're right,” I sighed. “Why do we have to hunt so many of our friend's relatives? I even kind of like this guy now. He made the most awesome coffee I've ever tasted.”

  “And he has nice suit,” Kirill added. “I zink I may start vearing more suits.”

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  There was a baby crying somewhere. The piercing wails were hurting my sensitive ears. It was in distress, that wasn't an ordinary cry. That was pain. Hurt. Fear.

  I wandered through the dark building, peering into every room I passed by. The cries just continued to echo, making me more and more nervous with each passing second. Who's baby was that? There were so many infants now. It couldn't be the phooka pups, this sounded much younger than they were. Was it Hunter or Mini V? It could be Daoir or Deidre. Zariel. I picked up my pace, beginning to run through the empty halls, my heels clicking on the faded linoleum like a harbinger of doom.

  “Where are you?” I cried into the shadows and they seemed to coalesce, taking frightening shapes. Tall, menacing shapes. Holes gaped
where mouths should have been and the glimmer of teeth was revealed. “Leave it alone!” I shouted at the shapes. “It's just a baby!”

  I stumbled over a chip in the linoleum and fell to my knees, scraping my skin like a child. The shadows closed in on me and I shrunk back, clutching at my stomach. My pregnant stomach. I looked down in horror, realizing that the cries were coming from me, echoing inside me. Then the belly was simply gone and there was a baby in my arms, red-faced and screaming.

  I couldn't tell what sex it was, didn't know if it was human, god, or fey. I couldn't tell anything beyond the fact that it had some powerful lungs. I winced against the sound and saw that the shadows were closer now, looming above us. I jumped up and pushed through them, hunching my shoulders around the wailing baby. My terrified baby.

  “Yes, shhh,” I crooned as I ran. “I know, I'm scared too but it's going to be okay. Mommy's going to make everything okay.”

  I laid out the child on the dirty, cracked floor, wrapping its blanket more firmly around it. Then turned to face the oncoming threat. I threw my hands down but no knives clicked free of my gloves, so I reached for my kodachi but I didn't have it on my hip. I willed my hands into claws but they just remained as they were. Human. Useless. I had nothing to defend us against the threat. I couldn't save my child from the shadows that hunted us. How could I be a mother? How could I have decided to do this to my own child? This was insanity.

  The babe continued to cry behind me, as if it sensed that the end was near. Mommy couldn't protect it, no matter how much power she collected. There would always be someone faster, stronger, smarter, and she had already reached her limit. No more power for the triple trinity being, the complete one. There was no hope for us. No chance to get stronger so we could save ourselves. Cry, baby, cry.

  “Hush little baby, don't say a word,” I started singing as the tears poured down my cheeks and I walked forward. At least I'd die before my baby would. No one should have to see their child die. “Mamma's gonna buy you a mockingbird.”