His & Hers

by Francheska Fifield

  He doesn’t seem to notice it’s not soda, normally he complains at me the whole time trying to get me to give in and give him a coke. It doesn’t happen and we don’t really argue it is more habit than anything. Neither of us ever stops complaining and neither of us changes. It is something I will miss.

  Cindy calls again and I push ignore. She wants to go get drunk. Even last time I only had one beer. The others drank more for sure, but I’m not a get drunk kind of girl.

  “Trisha, go out, have some fun. You will feel better. We can talk tomorrow.”

  He goes to his office and slams the door. And now I have angered him. My moping around the house is probably annoying. I text Cindy and tell her I am up for a girl’s night. Maybe Will is right; maybe I will feel better after going out. I haven’t left the house in a week; if I am going to have to leave soon I want to spend all the time here I can now.

  I go to the kitchen and bake and bake. By the evening when I have to start getting ready there are brownies, cookies, and breads. I do feel a little better. Then I think about how I will have to mass cook for Will and leave directions for reheating tapped to everything so when I leave he won’t die before getting a replacement for me. Unless he already has someone lined up.

  Once again I am bummed so I go and take my shower, not really caring how I look. I throw on a skirt, halter, and shoes. My hair goes into a ponytail. I put studs in because I don’t really care how I look tonight. I’m not trying to attract anyone. I am just miserable and looking for a distraction.

  I shove money, my ID, and my cell into my pockets. I will just plan on staying at Cindy’s place so I won’t need to bother Bobbi or the guys tonight. I walk out and the pizzas arrive. I take them into my kitchen and arrange them. I set up the chips and drinks and look around. It is amazing how much I have come to think of this kitchen as mine. In just a few months. It is funny how quickly the right place can become home to you.

  “You look nice.”

  I smile at Will and shrug.

  “I didn’t put any effort in it. Just grabbed stuff out of the closet really.”

  He nods.

  “You don’t need to put effort in to look beautiful Trish.”

  I think that is the nicest thing he has ever said to me. I go over and hug him as tight as I can. I hear a bit of intake in breath so I might be squeezing too hard, but he doesn’t ask me to stop so I don’t.

  “Be careful tonight. Call if you need anything Bobbi and I will come right out ok?”

  I nod and let him go, going to put on my shoes so he doesn’t see me cry. I can’t ask to stay. If it is what he wants then I shouldn’t force him to keep me here.

  The guys all burst in and I swallow my tears. I am so getting plastered tonight. Just one night of letting loose and forgetting how much this sucks.

  “Hey where are you going?”

  I smiles at Tommy.

  “Out. I’m going to try the girl’s night without the arrest this time.”

  They laugh and go straight to the food. A car honks and I grab a light jacket; fall is cooling the air down a bit here. I wave to everyone and walk out the door ready to start my night of fun.

  A few hours later I feel sick as a dog. I’ve had more drinks in the last three hours than I can keep track of. I started to feel fuzzy after an hour and kept going. While the others have taken breaks to dance I stayed at the bar….for the whole three hours.

  Cindy drags me into the bathroom where I throw up for what seems like forever. She helps me get mouthwash to gargle, mouthwash you can buy in little bottles, and gives me gum which makes me feel less disgusting but not by much. She splashes water on my face and dries me up, but it doesn’t help me feel better at all.

  “Why are you crying Trisha? And what the hell is with you tonight? You don’t ever drink when we go out, even when we are walking and shopping and stop for lunch.”

  “I have no home.” I am crying? I reach up and sure enough something wet is smearing my hands now. I guess alcohol is not good for me. I am puking and crying. Tonight was not the best night to get drunk for sure. I am so miserable and now I feel worse. I slump to the floor, lay my head on my knees, and just let the tears flow.

  “Trisha, give me your phone.”

  I don’t listen to her I just keep crying. She reaches into my pocket looking for my phone but I don’t care. Next thing I know I am mostly unconscious and someone is picking me up. I can hear Cindy talking to someone, but I’m not sure who it is or why it matters. She is letting them take me. Whoever it is. That is all I process before falling completely unconscious.

  I wake up and look around. I am in a bed, there is a bedside clock and it says 3 am. My head is pounding and I don’t recognize anything. Looking around I see I am in a hotel room. How the hell did I get here? And where is here?

  “Oww.”

  Sitting up to fast is a bad idea. I put my heel to my head and press. Pressure doesn’t help at all. Note to self, never drink again.

  “You’re awake.”

  Will comes over and put a cold wash cloth to my head. It feels a bit better. He hands me pills, please be strong pain killers, and water. I swallow them without thinking or caring what they are. I really can’t feel any worse.

  “Where are we?”

  He sits on the bed next to me. I slump back into a laying down position. He takes the washcloth I dropped and dabs my face and head. It feels good, but I am too tired to do it myself so I dropped the thing.

  “A hotel near the bar you were at.”

  “Oh. Why?”

  Thinking hurt so I am waiting for him to jump in on his own at any time and spare my head by telling me everything.

  “You passed out. Cindy freaked and called me. Bobbi and I headed right over, but the guys were still at my place awake and worried. I figured too many people wouldn’t be a good idea once I saw you. I didn’t believe her when she said you got so drunk you passed out. I thought maybe someone had spiked your drink or something.”

  I don’t even try to shake my head, if I do I am puking and I am smart enough to know it.

  “No. It was all me.”

  “I brought you here so you wouldn’t have twelve more guys trying to play nursemaid. They were so worried; I got a call or text every hour until about two. I guess they finally fell asleep.”

  “Thanks. I would have gone insane.”

  He smiles and takes the wash cloth off my face. I feel hot again instantly.

  “I figured. Come on let’s get you into a bath or shower. You will feel more sober after a cold shower.”

  I know there should be some reason to protest, but I can’t think of it so I let him help me up and to the bathroom. He turns on the shower and goes to leave. I stumble just trying to stand up straight.

  “Help.”

  “Help? I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “I can’t stand alone. I can’t even sit up on my own.”

  He sighs and looks around. He is red. Why is he red? Has he drunk a lot to? I reach out and his face feels as hot as mine. Yup he got drunk to. So why can he stand and I can’t?

  “Alright, let’s get you into the shower.”

  He gets my top off and my skirt. My shoes are MIA already. He then shoves me in to the shower and closes the door behind me. It takes less than a second for me to gasp and try to find my way out. He holds it closed until I stop gasping and remember showers aren’t always cold. I turn the knobs and it get in, warm. When it starts to fog he leaves the bathroom. Well isn’t he a smart ass.

  “Now my undergarments are soaked.”

  I strip them off and toss them over the shower door. I will deal with that later. I find the shampoo and body wash and I use an entire bottle on my hair and body. I am gross. Hopefully Will doesn’t need a shower as well.

  When I get out I dry off and spot a brush on the vanity along with an unopened toothbrush and toothpaste. I take full advantage of all. Even deodorant. Wow, this hotel is well equipped.

  I throw on a
robe because I don’t have anything else to wear. I find, tucked in a corner of the bathroom, one of those small stacked washer dryer sets. Sweet. I throw in all my clothes and prepare to go out there. My head feels a bit better, but I wasn’t holding out any hope my stomach wouldn’t turn on me again.

  “Hey, I ordered some food from the kitchens. It’s soup. I know you don’t really like soup, but you have to eat and it’s good for you. Also rolls. Bread products are great to help soak up the alcohol. Although, as much as Cindy saw you drink I should feed you coal. She said you drank a lot when the others were off dancing or so the bartenders said. Why were you drinking so damn much? I’ve never seen you touch alcohol and even your last incident the cops said you were way below the limits. One beer at most they said.”

  I hang my head and hug my stomach. Ugh I feel like shit. Will sighs, comes over and helps me to a chair with a table full of food. I sit down and slowly munch on the bread and ginger ale.

  We sit in silence for a few minutes as Will watches me eat to make sure I am. This is a role reversal.

  “If you didn’t want to leave you could have said so.”

  Where did that come from I hadn’t said anything….had I? I was so drunk I don’t remember what I said or when.

  “Uhhh, I take it I talked a bit when drunk out of my mind?”

  He nods and smiles.

  “A bit is an understatement. You kept saying you wanted to go home. I thought maybe you meant with your family at first. Then you mumbled on and on about having to leave your kitchen…”

  I did not. Oh please God, tell me I didn’t. What if I said something truly embarrassing or made a pass at him?

  “And feeling bad because I would starve without you.”

  I had? Oh man. I am never drinking again.

  “Ahhh.”

  One word answers is all I am capable of until I know my tummy will keep food down while talking.

  “So why didn’t you say you wanted to stay?”

  “You were looking at applications…”

  “Only because I thought you wanted to leave.”

  I flinch. Ouch Will’s raised voice hurts.

  He sighs and puts his head in his hands.

  “Trisha you drive me nuts.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  He comes over and kneels in front of me brushing my hair out of my face.

  “Not in a bad way. Trisha you were so upset I was trying to help, but I didn’t know what was wrong and then there’s the fact that I’m just terrible with people anyway. The more upset you got the less I could focus on anything I should be doing because I was so worried.

  “I was only looking at applications because you were looking for another apartment. I saw you looking at them online once. I then remembered what you said about leaving when we first made the deal, when we were driving out here. Honestly, I forgot about it after the first two weeks of having you with me. I never wanted you to leave and if you told me you didn’t want to I would have tossed the applications and never given it another thought.”

  He doesn’t want me to leave? Hung over is not the best time to have this conversation, but still I am so happy I jump at him knocking him over. I just lay on top of him hugging him not caring that my stomach and I have a difference of opinion right now.

  “I think you just broke something on me.”

  I shuffle off him and pull his hand signaling him up. He doesn’t look broken. So I hug him again. We are both sitting on the floor…ohh, comfy carpet.

  “Trisha you should be eating. Trust me it’ll be better with food in your stomach. Well better in the long run….”

  I grab his face and cut him off in midsentence with a kiss. I’ve wanted to, more than once, but never had the courage to do so. Now I am still a little drunk and it is excuse enough to try it and see if he feels the same about me.

  His eyes pop out of his head and he starts to kiss me back before pushing me away from him and looking half crazed.

  “Trisha, you still have a lot of alcohol in your system. Not like this.”

  “You don’t want to kiss me?”

  He clutches me to him and hugs me tight.

  “I want to, but you aren’t yourself right now. I want to kiss you when you aren’t drunk and feeling vulnerable. I want to know you want to be kissing me.”

  For some reason I feel what he is saying is important, but my body and head are not communicating well. So I let him sit me back in my chair and feed me soup since I can’t hold the spoon steady myself.

  Then he tucks me into bed and goes to sit on the couch. There is a pillow and blanket and it is pulled out into a bed. How sweet.

  Chapter Nine

  Next time I wake it is brighter than I remember. I get out of bed and find I am able to walk on my own. I go to bathroom quietly since Will is asleep. I shower and clean up again (more shampoo and everything have miraculously appeared), grab my clothes from the dryer and dress.

  Hurray, I am human again. I have a headache and take some Tylenol I find on the side of the sink. My stomach feels mostly normal, like when you recover from the flu and feel okay, but starved and you want to pig out but know you shouldn’t.

  I go out to the living room/ bedroom and look at Will asleep on the couch bed. I take the blanket and pull it up over him. I take his glasses off so they won’t break and put them on the table. I grab the phone near the bed and call room service. I have them send stew and a lot more rolls (no use tempting fate) and a huge pitcher of water. Hydration can only help me now.

  I chow down and when I finish I have no idea what to do. Will is still asleep so TV is out. I pick up the phone and call the house. I wonder if the guys or Bobbi are there still.

  “Hello. Will how is she?”

  “Nice to know you care Tommy.”

  “You’re alive!”

  “Of course I am. Will was such a good nursemaid and is now sleeping on the couch. I’m shocked you guys are still there.”

  It is 10 am and they are usually gone by then if there is no breakfast waiting for them, plus Will is gone.

  “Will said he would call in the morning before we left to tell us how you were. We had to order Ihop and Bobbi picked it up in exchange for some.”

  “Sweet deal.”

  “Yeah. Well we didn’t get a call so we texted, we didn’t call in case you were asleep.”

  “He’s unconscious on the couch bed. Taking care of a drunken girl is tiring I guess. It was 3 am last time I woke up and he was wide awake then.”

  “Probably in case you woke up. Bet you snored after. Drunken people always snore when they pass out.”

  Oh God, I hope not. How embarrassing. Well like I can be any worse than attacking him on the floor.

  “Trisha did you hear what I said?”

  “What? Sorry Tommy I’m still a bit out of it.”

  “I said we cleaned up so you don’t have to worry about it when you get home. Although I doubt Will would make you clean anything for a couple days. But we know how OCD you are so we picked up everything and vacuumed.”

  How nice of them

  “Thanks. I should go. I don’t want to wake up Will. The poor guy had enough trouble helping me all last night.”

  “What kind of trouble? Were you violent?”

  Does jumping him, pushing him to the floor and trying to make out with him count as violent? “Uhh, not exactly.”

  “Not exactly?”

  I can hear the grin in his voice. Damn nosey friends.

  “Ohh you didn’t!”

  “Didn’t what?” Play it cool.

  “You tried to have sex with him didn’t you? You little tramp!”

  I hear a lot of background noise all of a sudden I notice I’m on speakerphone. Great.

  “No. Not exactly.”

  Hooting, hollers, and five minutes of them getting out their male hormones later I am sighing in frustration.

  “Don’t say anything to anyone. He stopped me so I don’t exactly know where we stand.”
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  “Oh I wouldn’t worry about that. Try it now and he won’t stop you I bet.”

  “How can you be sure?” It’s not cheating asking his best friends really.

  “Because he has liked you since before you moved here and it got a whole lot worse real fast when you moved in with him. We IM daily and trust me that boy has it bad for you.”

  Isn’t this a betrayal of friendship? If my friends were this unsubtle I’d dump them and get new friends. Maybe it is different for guys.

  “What has he said?” It’s not cheating if they offer me the information. Tommy laughs and the others all snicker.

  “Why do you think he runs off with his lawyer to get you out of trouble, gives you compliments all the time, and lets you get away with taking time away from his work?”

  I never thought of it that way. He butts heads with me about the working less thing all the time. And I only make him come out for meals and walks so he doesn’t waste away.

  “That’s not what I asked you Tommy.” He laughs at my frustrated tone, all of them do.

  “Ask him yourself how he feels about you. It’s the only way you will know for sure. We can say all we want, but you won’t believe it until you hear it from him.”

  Damn him for knowing me well enough to use that against me.

  “Tommy sometimes you suck.”

  “What’s he doing now?”

  I almost drop the phone when I jump.

  “Will!” Okay that is still a bit too loud for my head. I can hear the chuckling through the phone. Will looks at me oddly, grabs the phone, and asks Tommy what’s up. I can’t hear what they are talking about, but Will does keep glancing at me as I walk to the balcony and open the door. It is a cool day, but it feels nice. I go outside and close the door behind me. Please Tommy, don’t tell Will what we were talking about. How embarrassing would that be?

  “Here you don’t want to catch a cold.” He hands me my coat and I smile while I shrug it on, but didn’t zip it up.

  “The cold feels good right now.”