Lose You Not

by Kristie Cook

  She ran off for the inn, my only response a snowball to her back. Watching from an upper window, Mammie shook her head, smiling. She’d been able to return to our realm, but not as often as before or for as long.

  “What is it about the Roca men that makes them so irresistible?” Addie asked, as she strode up the driveway Xandru had plowed overnight.

  Giving her a pointed look, I descended the steps to meet her. “There’s only one I find irresistible. As far as your pick, I have no idea.”

  “Yeah, me, either.” She sighed. “But you know, you can warn Sindi away all you want, but it’ll never work. Look at me. I can’t get past friendship and booty calls, but for some reason, I hold out hope for more.”

  “Well, if he’s anything like Xandru in bed, it’s definitely the booty calls that are irresistible.”

  “Yeah, those booty calls are pretty fucking awesome,” she said on a sigh. She bumped my shoulder as we began walking toward the square. “Don’t tell them that, though, or the next thing we know, one of them will be starting a booty call business.”

  We hit the corner of Main and Eleventh and continued north toward Into the Mystic New Age Books and Gifts on the east side of the square, where we were meeting Harper Sinclair.

  I braced myself, before saying, “So Tase is okay.”

  As expected, Addie growled. “Like I care.”

  “I know you do. I also know you won’t ask. But being your best friend, I will anticipate your questions: He’s doing better. He’s regained control, more like he was in the beginning. And …” I angled my head to look at her. “He misses you. He won’t stop asking me about how you’re doing.”

  We walked in silence for several strides, Addie pretending to ignore me.

  “That Eye is a dangerous piece of incredible magic, in the wrong hands,” she finally said.

  Understanding, I went with the subject change. “Well, I’m glad it’s in yours now. I don’t think anybody else’s would be more right. Definitely not Tase’s.”

  “No shit. If he’d kept that thing much longer, he would have been way worse off than Gabe. We all would have.” She suddenly growled again. “Hey! You made me talk about him.”

  “Sorry, not sorry. So are you going to tell me how you knew? About the Eye of Valerian and the cage and everything?”

  We stopped in front of the new age shop, but Addie blocked the door for a moment. “That’s why we’re here.”

  “To meet with Harper.”

  “Yes.”

  “Because she has this new power to summon demons?”

  Addie’s nose scrunched. “No. And it’s not a new power, but she’s learning how to control it now. She can also summon and channel other spirits.” She bit on her lip for a moment, making me tense with whatever she was about to say. “Michaela, she channeled your parents on New Year’s.”

  I flinched. “What? Eloise said they’re surrounded by darkness.”

  “Yeah, well, that’s kind of Harper’s thing. She can get past—or through—the darkness.” She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper that she handed to me. “This is what she scribed.”

  I opened the ball of paper to find a message scrawled on it, the handwriting nice and neat at first but becoming harder to read as the message seemed to gain in urgency:

  Atanase holds the Eye of Valerian. He covets the power for himself. Wants to harness it. Lacks understanding and respect. Just like our boys. History will repeat itself. Stop him Adelaide. Save our son. Save our daughters. Save our town from another massacre. Put the Eye in its cage. A skull in a shack on the side of the mountain.

  I looked up to find Addie watching me. “This is how you knew?”

  “Yes. And the message was right. I found the skull—the cage—in the Rocas’ mountain shack when Xandru and I were hunting down Tase.”

  “Wow.” I blinked as realization dawned on me. “Harper can communicate with my parents?”

  “Apparently. And we think they have more to say.” She pointed to the paper, at a place that I thought was just scribbles at first glance.

  “It says come back.”

  She turned and opened the door. “So here we are. I thought you might want to join us this time.”

  We entered the warm shop that was stuffed full but artfully arranged and inviting. New age books lined the bookshelves, which were painted in an array of bright colors. Candles in all shapes and hues were on display on tables covered with colorful scarves. Glass cases showed off jewelry and crystals. A mauve and gold chaise lounge and stuffed blue-checked chairs sat near an herbal tea counter. All was surrounded by purple walls.

  Eloise, Harper’s aunt, came through the beaded curtain in the back, dressed, as always, in brightly colored leggings and a tunic.

  “Good morning, girls,” she greeted with a smile as she brushed back wisps of auburn hair from her face. “Harper is in the back room. Same place as before, Addie.”

  With a nod, Addie led me through the beaded curtain to a back room, dimly lit with a single table lamp. A petite woman with long brown hair, about our age, was sitting on the opposite side of the table with paper and pencils spread out before her. When we entered, she looked up at us with pretty green eyes, her bare face showing off a natural beauty, especially when she smiled.

  I’d met Harper a few times in the past, but didn’t really know her, except through Addie, who’d spent a lot of time after school at the Academy, where the other girl had gone. Socially, Harper had always kept to herself. Since I’d been on the Court, and with recent events involving her, I’d learned why. Now, she was trying to find her place with the rest of us, with Addie’s help.

  “Hi,” Harper said with a hint of shyness. “Um … have a seat.”

  She motioned to the mismatched chairs on our side of the table. Addie and I peeled off our coats and hats, then sat down next to each other.

  “Did Addie explain how this works?” Harper asked. I shook my head. “Well, you basically sit there, and I bring demon spirits to the party.”

  “They’ll even fetch the booze,” Addie added.

  I looked back and forth between the two of them, trying to figure out if they were serious.

  Harper snickered. “I’ll try to leave the demons alone today. You want to talk to your parents?”

  “You can really reach them?”

  “I guess I did on New Year’s. But in fair warning, I haven’t done this much. I’m still learning.”

  I nodded. “Okay. Well, let’s try. What can it hurt?”

  Harper cringed. “Let’s hope nothing. This time.” She quieted for a moment, then said, “Mihail and Irina Petran, your daughter is here.”

  I held my breath, but nothing happened at first. Then the energy in the air shifted, and Harper’s hand suddenly grabbed at a pencil and began writing:

  We are here Irina and Mihail

  “Oh, my god,” I breathed. “Mom? Dad?”

  Hello again dear daughter

  Tears filled my eyes, but I didn’t know what to do. I looked at the paper and writing instruments around me, wondering if I should write a note.

  “You can talk to them,” Harper said.

  “Um … I miss you both,” I started, feeling awkward.

  Harper scribed: We miss you Gabe Aurelia. We are sorry. So sorry.

  “Me, too,” I blurted. “I wish you would have let me stay here. I didn’t get to say goodbye to you.”

  We tried to do what we thought best. We were wrong. We should have never done that to you. We are sorry.

  My throat tightened. I had so much to say to them, but now that I had the chance, words failed me. Maybe because of the lack of privacy, with Harper and Addie here. Or maybe because I knew discussion was pointless. They admitted they were wrong and apologized. We couldn’t change anything. It was time to let go. At least now I could say goodbye, tell them I loved them one more time.

  We love you so much, too. We are so

  Harper’s hand stopped movin
g.

  My focus flew from the paper to her face. “What happened?”

  She shook her head and whispered, “Something’s with them.”

  “Mom, Dad, are you okay?” I asked, trying to suppress the panic in my voice. “Mammie can’t find you. Eloise says there’s darkness around you.”

  Harper’s hand remained still.

  “Mom?” My heart picked up speed at the thought of losing them already. “Dad?”

  “Mr. and Mrs. Petran?” Addie said.

  The room fell deathly still and quiet for several heartbeats. A sob leaped into my throat.

  But then Harper’s hand began to move frantically:

  Need help. Infernum. Break the curse.

  I gasped and looked at Addie. “They’re in the Infernum? But how? Why?”

  In Infernum. Part of curse. Adelaide. Eye of Valerian. Break the curse. Break us free.

  Harper wrote the same message three times, then the pencil fell from her fingers and rolled across the table, as she slumped back in her chair.

  “They’re gone,” she whispered, her hand trembling. “Something was trying to stop the message. I think it took them away.”

  I didn’t know how long I sat there, stunned, staring at the papers.

  “What do we know about the Infernum?” I finally asked.

  “It’s a place like a purgatory to trap supernaturals who can’t be killed but should be,” Addie said. “Immortals, demons, and the like.”

  “But moroi can be killed. We’re mortal. They died. Right? So what are they doing there?”

  “Dark magic could have sent their souls there,” Harper said. “They said it was part of a curse?”

  “And something with the Eye of Valerian,” Addie said.

  I stared at the paper Harper had been writing on.

  “Break the curse. Break us free,” I murmured.

  “And my name.” Addie pointed at it. “They were trying to tell me this. It must be why they said to come back last time.” Addie grasped my hands and pulled them to her, twisting me in my seat until I faced her. She dipped her head to lock eyes with mine. “Which means they know I can do this, Michaela. That it can be done. I can end Tase’s curse and break them free, too. I will do this, okay?” She stared at me, her brown eyes imploring as she waited for an answer. “I can do this.”

  I slowly nodded. “Okay. Yeah. I trust you.”

  “Okay.” She gave me a small smile before turning back to Harper. “Again—this is badass, girl.”

  “I hope I can help,” Harper offered. “Whatever you need. I don’t know if I can get them back, but we can try another time.”

  Addie stood, taking me with her, since she still held my hand. “Sounds good. In the meantime, I have work to do. Lots of research. Maybe I can bring them questions, if we can reach them again.”

  Harper stood, too, and gave me a smile. “Are you sure you’ll be okay?”

  I nodded. “Um, yeah.” I cleared my throat because my voice came out hoarse, then I tilted my head to the side, toward Addie. “My bestie is a powerful witch. You can apparently do some really cool shit that will help. And me—” I paused, thinking. “Well, I don’t know what I have to offer, but we’ll figure this out. Right?”

  “Right.” Harper’s grin widened when I included her.

  “Definitely.” Addie released my hand, but looped her arm around mine.

  She turned us and walked us toward the front of the store, but I stopped at the door, pausing for a moment.

  I looked over my shoulder. “Harper, you should join us for girls’ night sometime. Graysin and Callie won’t mind. But you might have to be careful with Sindi. She has over a century’s worth of dead family and friends she’ll want you to channel.”

  Harper smiled. “That could be fun. Girls’ night, I mean.”

  “I’ll call you,” Addie said as we stepped out into the cold, blustery January morning. The sun had made a showing, but they were calling for more snow tonight. At least the skiing would be good this weekend.

  We walked back down Eleventh Street toward Main and our next destination.

  “What do you think about the Collector?” I asked Addie as I stared at the pawn shop sign we walked toward. “Do you the skinwalker was telling the truth?”

  “That’s what you’re thinking about right now?”

  “It’s what I want to think about right now.”

  She released my arm. “Okay, got it. Well, first of all, I forgot to tell you that we’re pretty sure the skinwalker is the same one that had been at the inn last spring. I kept some goo from the mine to test, and it seems to have all the same traits as the other goo. But there’s no way to know for certain. As far as the Collector …” She shrugged. “I don’t know. Faux-Magda seemed to know a lot about our town’s artifacts, so maybe. Maybe she or he or it is the Collector.”

  “Yeah, maybe.” I tilted my head forward, toward the pawn shop. “Or it could be Old Man Mills. I mean, he’s a dragon. Maybe artifacts are his treasure.”

  “I don’t know if he’s sinister enough to go as far as they did to obtain the Eye of Valerian.”

  “True, but I still don’t trust him. With that logic, though, it could be Roman. Or Ada Daryn, leader of the Green Coven.” Which, I’d learned since being on the Court, was the primary coven that took care of the Court’s nastier business that the Lunas didn’t want to dirty their hands with.

  “Oh,” Addie said. “They could be working together. They are a thing.”

  “Ew. Really?”

  We stopped at the curb to cross Main Street, and Addie leaned in close to whisper in my ear. “Graysin and Callie caught Ada blowing him at last year’s Moons in the Mist Bonfire.”

  “Oh, gross! I didn’t need that image in my head.”

  She laughed. “You’re welcome. So I guess that’s another mystery we need to solve: Is the Collector real?”

  “I think we should let the Court work on that one. You have a more important mystery to focus on.” I’d tried to say it lightheartedly, because I knew she was attempting to cheer me up, but the subject was too heavy and fell flat.

  We walked the rest of the way to Coffee Haven in silence, not breaking it until we sat in a corner seat with hot drinks in our hands.

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” Addie finally asked.

  I huddled over my cup of nectar, staring at the table as I self-assessed. Then I looked up at her. “Yeah. I’m okay. Gabe’s better. Aurelia’s … Aurelia. Xandru has some kind of surprise date planned for us that he swears will be the best date ever. And my friends are awesome. So what if my parents are trapped in purgatory, fighting off demons and the worst kind of evil darkness there is that wants to eat their souls?” I snorted. “But I trust you, and I believe in us. I know that somehow, we’ll all be okay.”

  She nodded. “Okay. Good.”

  “I mean, it’s mostly on you,” I added. “They actually gave your name. To break the curse and save Tase, and set them free from Hell. And all before Tase gets himself killed and Lucifer himself chomps on my parents’ souls. No pressure or anything.”

  She rolled her eyes. “No pressure. I got this.”

  If only I didn’t know her well enough to sense the uncertainty in her voice.

  But I really did trust her. And I honestly believed if anyone could succeed at this task, it was Adelaide Beaumont.

  I also knew she wouldn’t have to do it alone.

  After all, she, too, was family.

  Epilogue

  Michaela

  Aurelia and Gabe ditched me for the Festival of Lights. I’d even done my best mom-style guilt trip about it being our first one together to honor our parents and Mammie. After all, the Festival of Lights was about paying tribute to the town’s fallen who’d protected the people and the town’s secret during the Massacre of 1876, and ever since. Our parents and Mammie had played a role in protecting the people then and since then, and now they were gone, too.

  But Aurelia preferred to do the
whole thing with a group of friends, and Gabe just wanted to go to Cody’s house so they could play video games right after.

  “I told them it was a school night, so they’d better be home by nine, though,” I told Xandru as we rode down Main Street in his truck, admiring the bright pink and purple streaks in the sky as the sun set behind Miles Mountain.

  “Ech. You’re such a mom,” he teased. The hand that had been resting on my thigh gave a playful squeeze as he turned right on Eighth Street.

  “Hey, where are you going? Addie, Sindi, and everyone are meeting us on the slopes. Other way.” I pointed behind us.

  “Remember that surprise date?”

  “You mean, the best date ever?”

  “Well … surprise.” He looked over at me with a broad grin.

  “Wait. Now? But everyone else is waiting on us. What about the Festival of Lights?”

  He hitched his thumb toward the rear window. “I have lanterns in the back. Everyone else? Who the fuck cares?”

  I turned to look out the back window, glancing at the lanterns and a bunch of other stuff piled up in the bed. My gaze slid up, though, toward the ski slopes behind us, where all of our friends were. Then I turned and slumped into my seat, although I was admittedly excited to see where he was taking me. Sindi and Addie might have been mad, but they’d get over it. Or, for all I knew, they were in on the whole thing.

  I figured out the where pretty quickly. “You’re taking us to our spot?”

  He didn’t answer, but drove in silence. And that was exactly where he went. But instead of parking us as usual, facing the town, he backed in.

  “Stay here a minute,” he said, before sliding out into the cold.

  I turned in my seat and watched as he hopped into the bed of the truck, but then he hung a blanket over the rear window, blocking my view. I sighed as I turned back around and stared into the darkness that was quickly descending. Anyone who’d never been in the mountains in the middle of nowhere had no idea just how dark dark could be. Within minutes, only the snow, a faint glow, could be seen.

  My door opened, startling me. Xandru held his gloved hand out. “My lady?”