Max and the Snoodlecock
Page 18
Max reached full sprint in a matter of seconds, but with nowhere to hide and death closing in, he pushed towards the fire pit in hopes of wielding the roasting spit. The cat’s thumping stride grew louder and louder with each passing second. Max glanced over his shoulder, only to stare down the bulging eyes and galloping legs of his impending doom. He whipped his gaze back to the pit, now a stone’s throw away, but caught the edge of a boulder underfoot. His legs crossed and buckled, sending him tumbling to the ground and skidding to a halt. A cloud of dust infected the air as he flipped to his back and raised bloodied palms over his face. The beast planted its paws to either side and loomed over the human with sadistic intent. Hot, musky breath flowed between a pair of massive fangs. Slitted green eyes pierced its prey through a thick mane of bronze fur. Max cowered beneath the creature, helpless and shaking. The cat roared, stretched its mouth wide, and came down upon its victim.
Max screamed.
But nothing happened.
He opened his eyes and peeked over trembling arms to find the beast standing over him, only with playful eyes and a puckered grin.
“Gotcha,” it said with a British accent.
The feline burst into laughter and leapt off to the side, leaving Max in a state of paralyzed confusion. It rolled on the ground and cackled like a jackass while Max struggled to make sense of the situation.
“You should have seen your face,” the beast said while slowing to a chuckle. “Classic.”
Max narrowed his eyes, lifted to a seated position, and slogged his gaze over to the feline. “Ra—Ross?”
“No, your mum.”
Max glanced into the field, then back to Ross, then back into the field, then up to the sky, then back to Ross. “What the fucking fuck?”
“Good question.”
“Why are you a tiger?”
“Also a good question.”
“And where the hell are we?”
“An even better question.”
Max responded with puzzled silence.
“We’re still on Yankar.”
Max added a twitching eyelid.
Ross grumbled and shook his head. “You shifted while occupying a complex domain, you silly prat. I thought you would have figured this out by now. Never shift on a planet that you don’t want to inhabit for the rest of your life. You’ve been a lucky knob thus far, but not this time. Now you’re stuck on a primitive version of Yankar, one where the Yarnwal never evolved. And how many versions of this rock do you think they exist on? Bloody few, that’s how many. I swear, one of these days I’m going to smack you across the cheek with a dead—”
“Wait, wait, just, wait a goddamn minute.” Max took a deep breath, gathered his wits, and steadied his voice. “How the hell are you still here?”
Ross cocked an ear back. “Oh, right, that.” He cleared his throat and glanced away, as if ashamed. “Well, my friend, I guess there’s something you should know about me.”
THE END
The story continues with:
Max and the Banjo Ferret
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Zachry Wheeler is an award-winning science fiction novelist, screenwriter, and coffee slayer. He enjoys English football, stand-up comedy, and is known to lurk around museums and brewpubs.
Learn more at ZachryWheeler.com
ADDITIONAL WORKS
Puki Horpocket Presents
Roy: The Most Chaotic Midlife Crisis in Cosmic History
Max and the Multiverse Series
Max and the Multiverse
Max and the Snoodlecock
Max and the Banjo Ferret
Max and the Multiverse Shorts
The Item of Monumental Importance
Nibblenom Deathtrap
Sparkle Pirate
Hiss Bot Hank
Immortal Wake Series
Transient
Thursday Midnight
The Mortal Vestige
eBook Box Sets
Immortal Wake
Max and the Multiverse
BEFORE YOU GO
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FREE EBOOK
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