Seacrets

by Adrianna Wingate

  "Maura child, I can see that are afraid. Don't be. Katy talks tough but I remember when she picked my first , he was the loveliest of men. I, too, was a virgin. She will make certain ya don't get some mean bastard. She's got a big heart. We're like her family, since she never had any kids o' her own, see?" Sarah dabbed at the corners of Maura’s eyes with dingy towel. There, there child. Everythin' will be all right. It's just rough the first time and then you'll get used ta it. You'll toughen up." She tried to quell Maura's fears.

  Maura could feel the hair stand on end at the nape of her neck, as if she'd been struck by a bolt of lightening. Her whole body shook for a moment and she lifted her face level to Sarah's and stated, emphatically. "I will never get used ta this way o’ life, nor do I intend ta let myself succumb ta some disgusting vile animal ta crawl all over me night after night or let him take the only thing o’ value I have left in this cruel world." She spun around on her heels, and with her skirts swirling and her dark raven curls flying behind her and stormed out of the great dinning hall. "I will die first." She shouted, behind her. “You mark my words Sarah!"

  Sarah shook her head and continued her drudgery, silently remembering how she, too, had made such statements, but did not make it out of a whore's life. She hoped Maura would make it out one day or die trying. "Never give up, girl. I'll pray for ya tonight, love."

  §

  Leif Gilmore sat in front of a roaring fire, in his favorite winged chair, sipping bourbon and worrying. He could hear the dull clinks and clanks of glassware, and muffled voices coming from outside his Library door. It was the sound of the entire estate going crazy over the wedding of his daughter. His meal ticket, is more like it. He knew that for without this union his fortune was all but gone. And he was not going to rest easy until this blessed event took place. He laughed, sarcastically, with that thought. The sad part is his wife nor his daughter know how financially bad off they will be, if Daniel welshes on his part of the bargain to marry Mallory.

  Years ago, Richard Hargendon made some poor business decisions and he borrowed money from Leif's holdings and promised a marriage union of Leif's daughter to one of his son's. Leif would not have to pay a dowry and also would then inherit half the Hargendon estate upon such a union, in repayment for helping him out in his hour of need. Now it was Leif's hour of need. His holdings are dwindling, do to his gambling and lavish spending on his very spoiled and ungrateful daughter. He could not last another year, in the trades, without the inheritance that this union will bring. He continued to rub his forehead as if it were about to explode.

  §

  Upstairs Mallory was having the final alterations made to her lavishly expensive wedding gown. All ten of her bridesmaids were in attendance. They all giggled and cooed over the sensuality of the white gossamer fabric she had chosen for her wedding night dressing gown.

  "Mallory darling you'll be lucky to keep this garment on for more than a minute or two." Her best friend Clarice snickered.

  "And why would I want to keep it on at all, Clarice." They laughed aloud, falling back onto the bed.

  Mallory shooed all the others away. Only she and Clarice remained in her chamber. When the door closed behind the others Mallory confided to her best friend. "Oh Clarry I can only tell you, of all my dearest friends, the whole truth of my heart." As they lay on their sides, braced against elbows, Mallory began talking of her lover, Thomas Turlington.

  "Clarry you know I think Daniel is one of the most handsome men in all of Boston, lord knows an excellent master in lovemaking. But my heart belongs to Thomas." She stretched out her arm and laid her head atop of it, while playfully curling an auburn lock about one finger, she continued talking to Clarice, but not really caring or noting if she were really listening to her. Many times Mallory just liked to hear the sound of her own voice.

  "Mallory, you are getting married tomorrow! This must stop, now! Do you hear me!" Clarice always worried overly much about her lifelong friend.

  "Yes, Clarice. I hear you, and so what of it." As she rose to her feet and walked over to her vanity. "Do you think for one moment that Daniel is planning on being faithful to me after we say our I do's? I think not! As a matter of fact he is going out on the town tonight with his brother and some friends and will probably lay down with some whore tonight. But I care not, Clarry, for tomorrow eventide I shall be Mrs. Daniel Hargendon. And all that trades money will be mine and I shall never have to worry about my life's needs." She said as she stared into the mirror, creaming her elbows and looking at her friend's reflection. "Come, come now, Clary. You know me. I'm like a cat. I have nine lives. I always land on my feet. I'll be fine."

  "But what of poor Thomas. Will you continue seeing him, even after you're married to Daniel?" Clarice asked, as if she didn't already know the answer to that question.

  "But of course I am, Clary. That's what will make my boring humdrum of a life more exciting. The thrill of not getting caught! Oh how I love being wicked. In fact Thomas is invited to the wedding. I just might find a private, lustful moment to let him have his way with me then." She laughed aloud.

  Clarice gave her the usual disapproving looks, but she knew well Mallory would do as she pleased anyway. "Why do you talk to me at all Mal. You just do what you will anyway." Clarice sat on the edge of the bed with her hands folded, staring down at them.

  Mallory walked over to her friend and sat beside her. She placed her arm around her and kissed her on her cheek. "If I didn’t have you to talk with I'd go insane. You are the only person in this whole world I truly trust. You are the purest relationship I have in my life. If I tell you things it's because it is too much for me to bear to keep it in. As for Daniel, well I care for him, but I don't love him in the way that you love your Robbie. Yours is a deep, true, once in a lifetime love. You got lucky. And for that I truly am happy for you. But I'm not you, Clary, and I never will be. I know full well why I am getting married tomorrow and none of it has anything to do with being in love. It’s all about money. So don't ask me to be someone I'm not, okay Clarry?"

  Clarice hugged her friend tight, then continued on with the finishing touches on the gown

  §

  Daniel sat quiet in front of the hearth in the main gathering room in his parent's home, at Hargendon Manor. He did not notice his mother had come to stand beside him.

  "Daniel, it is so wonderful to have you home again. I can see you are in deep thought, my son. You look as though you are awaiting the governor to declare a stay of execution."

  They both laughed aloud.

  "My dear mother, but you do have a lively sense of humor."

  “I do wish that ya father were here ta give ya some pearls o’ wisdom. I am here to listen if you want ta talk.”

  "I know that mother, and I'm grateful." A long silence passed between them.

  Mary Hargendon was a woman of slight proportions. Daniel towered high over his mother. Her hair was somewhat graying, at the age of fifty and one. Her skin showed nary a wrinkle. Her eyes were hazel and careworn."Daniel, I know ya do not want ta marry this girl. If ya were ta back out not a soul in this town would have a thing ta say about it. Everyone knows she's not exactly been faithful to ya while ya have been betrothed to her. She's been seen all over town with that Thomas Turlington fellow. She thinks no one has noticed. I don't want ta see ya unhappy for the rest of your life son."

  "Did you say Thomas Turlington?" Daniel queried.

  "Yes, why?" Now Mary was worried her son may want satisfaction.

  “Well I've heard that name before, but I can't remember where?" Is Godsey about the property, today?"

  "Yes. I think he's out in the stables getting’ the carriage ready for you take into town tonight." She had a worried look upon her face, at this moment. "Daniel, Ya are not lookin’ for satisfaction with this fellow, are ya?"

  “Mother, please, over Mallory? Be serious. I know damn well she's no chaste virgin. I'd have ta be a complete fool. And I'm no fool. Mother. This union is simply a
business debt that I am repaying for my father. Nothing more. "Satisfaction. That's laughable. I've got ta go, Mother. We'll talk, tomorrow, before the ceremony." He stood, and gave his mother a kiss atop her forehead and hurried to find Godsey.

  "Godsey, man. Are ya out here?" Daniel shouted.

  "Yes, captain, sir. I'm right around the stall, here. Somethin’ wrong, sir?" Godsey replied from behind Daniel's black stallion, Demon.

  "Godsey, do ya remember the name o’ the people that ya were ta take Maura to, before she went missing?"

  "Yes, sir, that'd be Turlington, sir. Thomas Turlington. I went there and he said he did receive the dowry monies for her but she ne’er showed up at his general store after the ship docked."

  For a fleeting moment Daniel thought he might have a chance to find Maura. Now his heart sunk, again. He’d never stopped thinking of her, not for one day. Why would she just leave without saying goodbye. The only thing that might have happened is if she had accidentally fallen overboard in her hast to retrieve her belongings. He felt haunted by her memory. He could hardly close his eyes at night without seeing her angelic face above his, without feeling her soft skin against his skin. Will I ever get over missing her? He would shake his head vigorously, at times and chide himself. You fool. Why are ya continuin’ ta think about this wisp of a girl? You were only with her a short time and she has this kind of hold on you? Then there would be other times when he would tell himself that this kind of love only comes around once in a life time." At times he felt grateful, he’d had the chance to know what real love feels like. Not just lustful feelings but really being in love from your head right down to your feet, kind of love. He had an all too familiar lump growing in his throat, again. Happens to him at least once a day, whenever she crosses his mind. Then he has to fight her out of his mind, and just to go on with his day. He especially thinks of her whenever he is in the presence of his soon to be wife, Mallory.

  "Godsey, I'm goin’ inta town early. Tell my brother Aiden I'll meet up with him and the others at the tavern, later tonight. I want ta go back down ta the docks and look around. Mayhap I missed some clue to Maura's whereabouts’."

  As Daniel walked away, Godsey shook his head, pitifully, and thought "Captain's got it real bad for that girl. He's got to accept the fact she's dead, plain and simple. Godsey, himself had come to that fact, some weeks earlier, when she had not showed at the Turlington's. He had cried his tears then. He felt as though he had let her down, as well as her father. He took out his handkerchief, blew his nose into it and stuffed it back into his vest pocket, then returned to his stable chores.

  §

  Maura was in her bed chamber, sitting before the vanity mirror. Katy was fussing all around her, putting the finishing touches on her coif and lip coloring. Maura was utterly appalled at her appearance. She had never worn lip rouge or coloring, of any kind to her eyes and cheeks. She felt cheap.

  Katy dressed her hair with bright colored feathers and brushed a bit of rouge to Maura's décolletage area. Maura's breasts were overflowing from the top of the undersized black and red dressing gown, Katy had chosen for her first coupling. Maura wanted to burst into tears, but would not give in to her feelings of despair.

  "There, now ya be ready for any fine gent." Katy chatted away, behind Maura, looking at Maura's reflection in the mirror.

  "If they were fine gents, they would be home with their wives and daughters, instead of here breaching their vows!" Maura quipped.

  Katy slapped Maura's face to the point of leaving a welt on the girl's cheek. "You listen ta me miss high and mighty. You ain't part o' that life no more, ya hear?" Her eyes glared with hatred for Maura. "You don't have no say anymore 'bout nothin'. You belong ta Kilern and ta me. Get that inta ya head, straight away. This is ya life now. No other!" Katy reached for her bourbon glass and took some ice from the glass to place on Maura's cheek, to try and get the swelling to go down. "Now look what ya made me do ta ya. No gent is gonna want a beat up ole hag. Keep that on ya cheek ‘til the swellin’ goes down and I'll come back and check on ya in a while." As Katy swaggered to the chamber door, she turned to Maura and said, "You be ready when I send the gent up to ya. And don't ya be givin' him no hard time of it or you'll get worse than what I just gave ya." Katy slammed the chamber door behind her and bolted it shut.

  Maura looked at herself in the mirror and began to sob uncontrollably. She thought to herself. "I must escape from here, tonight, before Katy comes back. I'll climb out the window. If I fall and break my neck, so be it. At least I'll die trying ta escape. I can not just give myself over ta this life. I cannot! I will not!" She stood up, walked to the window and looked out of it. It was a long way down. At least two stories high.

  She looked around the room for something that might help her to reach the ground. She looked again at her bed and then grabbed for her bed linens. Pulling them from the bed, she tied them together with the tablecloth and three long dressing gowns. She hung them out of the window and tugged hard on them to test their strength and length. They were long enough to reach the first landing. She'd have to jump the rest of the way. She tied one end to the bedpost and then made her attempt to escape out of the window.

  Maura sat on the window sill, terrified at the height she'd have to jump from, but then realized that is how desperate she had become to escape this vile life. She gave one more tug, for reassurance, and then jumped out of the window. With her eyes shut tight she swung down and to the right, crashing her body into the side of the building. She knew she would be bruised from stem to stern, come morning, but if she made it out, it would all be worth it.

  She opened her eyes and realized she came up immensely short, with regards to reaching her destination. She would have to jump a greater distance than she'd figured. When she stopped swinging from the bed linens she saw she wasn't that far from the tree outside her window. She pushed her feet out and away from the tavern's outer wall and attempted to try and reach the great oak and wrap her legs around one of it's larger, more secure limbs. It took several tries, but she finally made it.

  Inside the tavern, Katy kept hearing an odd thudding noise. It was difficult to discern of its origin, as the usual nightly arrivals were becoming noisier by the minute. Between the piano, and loud drunken voices, Katy was always ready for some headache remedy, by dawn. Katy spied the clock on the wall to be around twenty-two bells. She thought she would check to see if Maura was ready for her big debut.

  Outside Maura had at last reached the oak tree and was hanging on for dear life with her legs straddling a great limb. She remembered climbing much greater trees than this one, as a girl. She grabbed the limb with both hands and let her feet fall free. She hung for a moment and then let go, falling to the muddy ground, hands and knees covered. Maura could care less how filthy she was, at the moment. She was free.

  Katy swung open the chamber door wide and called out to Maura. "Come now girl. Enough of this childishness. Come out from underneath the bed and get ready for ya gentleman caller'." Katy stood for a long moment in silence. Then she felt a breeze come from across the room. She saw the linen trailing out of the window and waves of fury washed over her.

  Then fright over took her feelings of rage. She knew Kilern would not be happy and would most likely take it out on her sorry old hide. She rushed to the window and looked out but saw only the torn and tattered bed linens hanging from the tree. Katy slammed her fist onto the sill and cursed Maura "I will find that little wench, and when I do she will rue the day she misused my kindness, she will."She slammed the window shutters closed and stomped out of the room.

  §

  Maura had run around back to the livery. She thought to borrow a horse from one of the tavern patrons and leave a note of promissory. She washed off as much of the mud as possible in the horse trough. Then looked around for an old blanket to wrap herself into for the night. She found an old black woolen cape, hanging on a hook by one of the horse stalls, and donned it. She climbed atop an old paint, an
d rode out of the stable bareback, arms tightly wrapped around the horse's neck. She rode as fast as she could. She wasn't that far from the docks. She could smell the salt sea air. She thought it might be a hopeless venture, but mayhap Daniel's ship was still docked there and her belongings were still aboard. Daniel had mentioned his last voyage would have been the one they she sailed over on.

  If he hadn't sold his vessel as yet, then it may still be docked in the harbor. If not, then she would try and find out where he may be reached and obtain her belongings and a small loan of some sort. Surely he would not cast her aside after what they had shared. Could he have forgotten her already? She had not forgotten him.

  The night air was crisp and clear. It was springtime in New England. The atmosphere had a wet mossy flavor. Even so, there was still a cold, raw snap to the air, especially at night by the water's edge.

  Maura could see several frigates docked at waters edge but was still too far away to detect which one, if any, was the Arabella. She slid down off of the horse and tied her dressing gown sash around the animal’s neck and secured the horse to a post near the far end of the dock. She wanted to be able to make a quick get away, if need be. She shrouded her head, with the hood of the cape to try and disguise her identity. She knew it would be a matter of time before Katy would discover her missing and would be out scouring the docks looking for her.

  Maura cautiously began to make her way down towards the ships. As she approached the first ship she knew it was not the Arabella. It was too small a vessel. She continued on down the dockside. As she was approaching the second vessel, she saw a tall dark masculine figure walking towards her and intuitively hung her head downward to disguise herself.

  §

  Daniel stood in the portal of his cabin staring at his bunk, one final time. He could not be in here without thinking of he and Maura and the passion that they had shared. His one and only regret was he did not take her that night. It was not for lack of want. Oh he did want her. That he could not deny. Feeling as though he'd hit another dead end in his quest for an answer to her disappearance, he shook his head in an effort to try and push her, once more, out of his thoughts. He backed out of the portal and closed the door.