by Mike Sherer
the!accusation!was!clear.!!
!
I!frowned.!I!kept!telling!Jeri,!the!leader!of!a!support!group!I!
attended,!that!sleep,!not!anger,!was!really!the!issue!I!needed!to!
work! on.! Keely! Radcliffe! appeared! attractive! enough! that! in!
other! circumstances! the! thought! of! asking! her! out! for! coffee!
may!have!entered!my!stream!of!consciousness.!As!things!stood,!
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neither!her!looks!nor!her!play!to!my!sense!of!guilt!had!worked!
for! her! so! far.! A! more! direct! route! seemed! in! order! so! she!
didn’t!string!this!out!all!morning.!
!
“What!do!you!want?”!!
!
She!recoiled!but!recovered!quickly.!“I’d!like!you!to!help!me!
find!him.”!
!
I! shook! my! pounding! head,! pain,! lack! of! sleep! and! the!
absurdity!of!her!proposal!clouding!my!thoughts.!“I!haven’t!seen!
or! spoken! to! Perry! Langford! since! he! went! to! prison.! I! don’t!
know! where! you! got! my! name,! but! you’re! barking! up! the!
wrong!tree.!I!don’t!have!a!clue!where!he!is,!and!don’t!know!that!
I!care!to.”!
!
“Please.”!She!took!a!faltering!step,!her!eyes!beseeching!me.!
“Hear!me!out.”!
!
“Keely,!was!it?!Where!you!come!from!maybe!it’s!perfectly!
acceptable!to!call!on!people!at!this!hour!of!the!morning.!But!in!
my! world! it’s! bedtime.! I! get! cranky! and! just! a! little! bit! testy!
when! I’m!up!past!my!bedtime.!A!holdover,!I’m!sure,!from!my!
childhood! and! no! doubt! one! of! my! many! failings.! Whatever,!
you’ll! just! have! to! excuse! me.! I! think! you’ve! mistaken! me! for!
someone!who!cares.!Good!luck!to!you,!whoever!you!are.”!
!
I!spun!on!my!heel!and!left!her!standing!there.!On!the!way!
down! to! my! apartment,! I! wondered! when! I’d! skewed! my!
priorities!so!far!off6kilter!that!I!preferred!a!down!pillow!to!the!
company!of!a!pretty!woman.!
!
Not!long!after,!I!dreamed!of!a!skinny!kid!with!dirty!blond!
hair,!a!nose!that!looked!as!if!had!been!flattened!by!the!smack!of!
a!nun’s!ruler!and!eyes!the!color!of!a!hazy!summer!day!in!L.A.!
flecked!with!yellow!smog.!His!wide!mouth!perpetually!turned!
up! at! the! corners! in! a! “He6e6re’s! Johnny”! smile,! the!
accompanying! glint! in! his! eye! either! mischief! or! madness.! I!
could!never!be!sure!which.!!
!
He! picked! up! a! two6foot! cylinder! of! polished! aluminum!
from!a!worktable!in!the!garage.!About!three!inches!in!diameter,!
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it!gleamed!in!the!dim!light,!almost!as!if!lit!from!within.!Half!the!
six6bay!garage—formerly!a!small!barn!on!what!had!once!been!
the!outskirts!of!town—held!a!workshop,!the!other!half!an!odd!
collection!of!antique!cars.!A!treasure!trove!to!young!boys,!filled!
with! tools,! gadgets,! car! parts,! dingbats! and! widgets,! whozits!
and!whatchamacallits,!the!shiny!cylinder!just!one!more!toy!in!a!
fantasy!playground.!!
!
Grease6stained! canvas! tarps! hung! haphazardly! over! a!
Model! T! and! a! horseless! carriage! that! predated! the! Ford! by!
two!decades.!An!old!woody!wagon,!cherry!as!the!day!it!came!
off! the! assembly! line,! sat! in! one! corner,! hood! up.! Wires!
sprouted! out! of! the! engine! compartment,! curling! over! the!
fenders! like! vines.! A! big! lathe! and! drill! press! stood! in! one!
corner.! Wooden! worktables! and! benches! lined! the! walls,!
covered!in!wood!and!metal!shavings,!small!pyramids!of!gunk,!
oil!spots!and!hand!tools.!Dust!motes!floated!in!the!sunlight!that!
angled!inside!an!open!garage!bay!door.!A!puff!of!air!redolent!of!
oil,!solvents!and!newly!cut!grass!stirred!them!lazily.!
!
The! kid! tipped! the! cylinder! on! end,! resting! the! butt! on! a!
bench.! The! cylinder! sported! a! half6inch! hole! on! top,! a! dead6
center! black! bull’s6eye! ringed! with! silver.! He! picked! up! a!
dented!can!containing!black!powder!and!poured!some!into!the!
hole.! Using! a! metal! rod! tipped! with! a! square! of! stained! blue!
cloth,!he!tamped!the!powder!down!into!the!hole.!He!centered!a!
clean!circle!of!white!cotton!over!the!hole!and!shoved!it!inside!
with! the! rod.! From! another! can! on! a! shelf,! he! tipped! a! single!
stainless!steel!ball!into!the!palm!of!his!hand.!The!metal!marble!
gleamed!in!the!light,!heavy!in!his!hand,!but!so!shiny!it!appeared!
clear!and!weightless.!Grinning,!he!held!it!up!between!his!thumb!
and! forefinger! and! dropped! it! down! the! hole.! It! disappeared!
with! a! soft! rasping! sound.! He! tamped! another! cloth! round! in!
after!it.!!
!
He! set! the! cylinder! into! a! vise! bolted! to! one! end! of! a!
wooden!sawhorse,!and!gently!cranked!the!jaws!closed.!With!a!
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wave!he!signaled!me!to!take!the!other!end!of!the!sawhorse,!and!
we!carried!it!outside!and!placed!it!in!the!driveway.!He!inched!
his! end! around! until! satisfied! with! where! it! sat,! and! ducked!
back! into! the! garage.! A! moment! later,! he! lugged! a! bag! of!
cement! back! out! into! the! hot! summer! sun! and! leaned! it! up!
against! a! leg! of! the! sawhorse,! then! went! back! inside! and! got!
another.!!
!
When! he! finished,! he! pulled! what! looked! like! a! piece! of!
string!from!one!pocket,!and!a!wooden!kitchen!match!from!the!
other,!a!gleam!of!triumph!in!his!eyes.!He!poked!the!string!down!
into! a! small! hole! in! the! side! of! the! cylinder! I! hadn’t! noticed!
before.!Slick!as!you!please,!he!bent!down!and!struck!the!match!
against! the! concrete! drive.! He! touched! it,! still! flaring,! to! the!
fuse.!We!watched!it!spark!and!burn!down!into!the!hole.!!
!
A!second!later,!the!cylinder!spat!fire!with!a!resonant! boom!
that!rattled!my!teeth!and!made!me!jump.!Fifty!yards!away,!the!
half6inch!steel!ball!ripped!a!chunk!the!size!of!a!melon!from!the!
trunk! of! a! big! oak! tree.! Despite! the! forty6pound! sacks! of!
concrete! mix,! the! sawhorse! flew! ten! feet! behind! us.! Blood!
trickled!down!one!of!my!shins!where!it!had!clipped!me!on!the!
way.!
!
“Per6 ry!”! A! woman’s! voice! called! from! the! house.! “Perry6
winkle!Langford,!what!on!earth!are!you!up!to?”!
!
With! a! grin,! Wink! grabbed! one! end! of! the! sawhorse! and!
quickly!dragged!it!into!the!garage.!
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!
!
Chapter&5&
!
!
Langford! pushed! himself,! finishing! his! last! taekwondo!
pumsae! with! as! much! exertion! as! he! could! muster,! his! bare!
torso! glistening! with! sweat.! He! pulled! up! and! walked! around!
the! clearing! with! his! hands! on! his! hips,! breathing! heavily.! He!
took!in!the!woodsy!scents!of!fir,!spruce!and!cedar!and!the!sa
lt!
air!coming!off!the!water!in!front!of!the!cabin.!The!flat!expanse!
of!water!reflected!the!light!blue!sky!of!early!morning.!An!eagle!
chattered! high! in! the! topmost! dead! branches! of! a! nearby!
Douglas!fir.!
!
“Good!morning!to!you,!too,”!he!said!with!a!small!smile.!
!
The! eagle’s! high6pitched! piping! cleared! the! last! of! the!
cobwebs! from! his! brain.! He’d! slept! like! the! dead! for! the! first!
time! in! years.! In! prison,! he’d! learned! to! sleep! with! one! eye!
open.!In!prison,!he’d!learned!a!lot!of!things.!His!first!year!inside!
he’d! spent! in! a! SHU—single! housing! unit—in! “D”! unit! in! East!
Corridor.!Not!the!worst,!but!housing!reserved!for!really!violent!
offenders.! The! egregiously! brutal—the! hard6case! murderers!
and!those!with!revolutionary!tendencies—got!locked!down!in!
“H”! unit,! otherwise! known! as! “the! hole.”! The! solitude! had!
nearly! killed! him.! Twenty6two! hours! a! day! in! a! space! only!
twice!the!size!of!a!grave.!But!good!behavior!and!a!sympathetic!
warden! had! earned! him! a! cell! in! “C”! where! he’d! had! more!
freedom—a!communal!mess!hall,!more!recreation!time,!access!
to!the!prison!library!and!the!commissary.!
!
He’d! made! a! point! of! not! risking! a! return! to! the! SHUs,!
keeping!his!nose!clean,!working!hard!at!the!various!prison!jobs!
he’d!held!over!the!years.!He’d!found!ways!to!manage!prison!life!
without!succumbing!to!its!degradations.!But!he!knew!solitary!
confinement!would!have!slowly!driven!him!insane.!And!then!a!
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few! years! earlier,! just! like! that,! the! entire! prison! had! been!
converted!to!a!medium6security!facility.!!
!
He!stretched,!grateful!to!the!old!man!who’d!taught!him! tai*
chi! in! the! exercise! yard! every! day.! Distance! learning,! he’d!
called! it,! watching! and! emulating! the! man’s! movement! from!
two!enclosures!away!in!silence,!since!talking!was!a!punishable!
infraction.!Demonstrating!or!practicing!martial!arts!had!been!a!
“high!severity!prohibited!act,”!but!the!old!man!had!convinced!
the!assistant!warden!that!it!was!a!form!of!meditation!integral!
to!his!Buddhist!religion.!Langford!had!recognized!it!for!what!it!
was—slow6motion! self6defense! skills.! Skills! that! had! warded!
off! the! few! attempts! others! had! made! to! turn! him! into! their!
bitch,!teach!him!respect!or!simply!put!him!at!the!bottom!of!the!
prison!pecking!order.!All!he’d!wanted!was!to!be!left!alone,!and!
it!hadn’t!been!long!before!most!of!the!cons!recognized!he!was!
no!threat!and!steered!clear.!Later,!with!the!Internet!privileges!
he’d! earned,! he’d! studied! the! tae* kwon* do! forms! he! now!
practiced.!
!
The! lack! of! fences! and! bars,! barbed! wire! and! guards! still!
seemed! otherworldly! to! him.! He! wasn’t! used! to! the! lack! of! a!
schedule,! and! he’d! automatically! been! waking! early,! keeping!
prisoner’s!hours.!He!didn’t!mind.!Mornings!here!on!the!outside!
were! glorious,! quiet! and! peaceful.! Sunrises,! which! happened!
early! this! time! of! year,! were! the! most! gorgeous! things! he’d!
seen!in!twenty!years.!He’d!spent!his!first!few!mornings!at!the!
cabin! sitting! on! the! shore! watching! the! sky! lighten! and! turn!
pink,! orange! and! finally! a! brilliant! turquoise! as! Earth!
inexorably!spun!on!its!axis!toward!the!sun.!!
!
He! put! thoughts! of! prison! out! of! his! mind.! No! sense!
dwelling! on! the! past.! Besides,! he! needed! his! head! clear! to!
accomplish!all!he’d!set!out!to.!There!was!more!work!to!do!on!
the!cabin!and!he!needed!supplies.!All!that!could!wait,!though.!
Breakfast! first.! After! his! workout,! his! stomach! growled!
ravenously.!
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*!*!*!*!*!
!
A! second! boom! echoed! in! my! ears! as! Wink’s! smile! faded!
along!with!the!dream.!I!frowned!in!my!sleep!and!slowly!drifted!
up! to! consciousness,! the! noise! finally! registering! as! someone!
pounded!on!my!door.!
!
“Keep!your!damn!shirt!on,”!I!yelled.!“I’m!coming.”!
!
I!yanked!on!a!pair!of!blue!jeans,!ran!my!fingers!through!my!
hair! and! padded! barefoot! across! the! cold! wood! floor! to! the!
door.! A! man! in! a! suit! appeared! on! the! other! side! of! the!
peephole.! I! didn’t! recognize! him.! Sensing! my! presence,! he!
raised! a! badge! in! front! of! the! peephole.! The! sight! of! it! jump6
started! my! heart,! sending! a! surge! of! adrenaline! coursing!
through!my!veins!like!a!hit!of!cocaine.!
!
“FBI,”!the!badge!said.!“Open!up,!Mr.!Sanders.”!
!
My!palms!grew!damp!and!clammy.!“What!do!you!want?”!
!
“Don’t!make!us!kick!in!the!door,!Mr.!Sanders.”!
!
I!could!have!told!him!to!go!away,!but!he’d!probably!come!
back.!And!if!he!made!good!on!his!threat,!it!would!take!an!extra!
shift!at!the!restaurant!to!pay!for!the!damage!to!the!door.!The!
bright! aqua! numerals! glowing! on! the! microwave! in! the! small!
kitchen! dog6paddled! into! focus—11:22.! At! the! rate! my! pulse!
thrummed! in! my! ears,! going! back! to! sleep! was! out! of! the!
question.!With!a!sigh,!I!swung!the!door!open!and!padded!into!
the!kitchen!to!make!a!pot!of!coffee.!
!
The!first!suit!through!the!door!stood!in!the!middle!of!my!
small! apartment,! alert! but! relaxed,! eyes! following! my!
movements.! A! close6cropped! nap! of! tightly6curled,! steel6gray!
hair!framed!a!face!the!color!of!my!usual!morning!latte.!A!grill!
brush!in!matching!gray!covered!his!upper!lip.!He!wore!the!suit!
with! practiced! authority,! radiating! a! presence! larger! than! his!
slight!stature.!A!collar!pin!in!the!freshly6starched,!snowy!white!
shirt!pushed!the!knot!of!a!regimental!tie!into!the!room!like!a!
signal!flag.!!
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!
“Mr.! Sanders,! I’m! Special! Agent! Drucker,”! he! said.! High!
cheekbones! and! crow’s! feet! around! his! eyes! suggested! he’d!
known!how!to!smile!once.!Maybe!he’d!forgotten.!
!
Drucker,* rhymes* with* “f___er.” ! Too! early! to! think! in! those!
terms,! but! mnemonics! and! forced! concentration! helped! me!
remember!names!a!little!better!at!least!some!of!the!time.!
!
“And! what! makes! you! special,! Agent?”! Chalk! it! up! to!
nerves;!I!heard!the!words!at!the!same!time!he!did.!
!
The! small! sigh! and! curled! lip! said! he’d! heard! it! before.!
“This!is!Special!Agent!Taylor.”!He!waved!a!hand!without!taking!
his!gaze!off!me.!
!
A!second!man!had!followed!the!first!inside,!much!younger!
and!not!as!comfortable!in!a!suit,!though!it!hung!well!on!a!body!
head! sprouted! without! benefit! of! a! neck! directly! from! broad!
shoulders! that! rippled! under! the! material! as! he! moved.! A!
shadowed! area,! like! the! stubble! against! his! dark! complexion,!
outlined!male!pattern!baldness.! Mr.*Clean,*in*those*white*pants,*
like* sailors’* pants;* Taylor* rhymes* with* “sailor.” ! He! stepped! to!
one! side,! sizing! up! the! place! as! if! casing! it,! and! examined! the!
books! and! magazines! strewn! on! the! coffee! table.! He! hadn’t!
given!me!more!than!a!glance!since!he’d!entered.!
!
The!coffeemaker!burbled!behind!me.!I!took!a!step!toward!
Drucker,! arms! outstretched,! wrists! pressed! together.! His!
expression!went!from!curious!to!scornful.!
!
“What,! no! warrant?”! I! said.! “Guess! you! wouldn’t! have!
kicked! in! the! door! after! all.”! I! watched! Taylor! riffle! through!
some!papers!on!the!small!dining!table!that!doubled!as!a!desk.!
“Find!anything!interesting?”!!
!
His!attention!didn’t!even!flicker.!!
!
Again!my!mouth!moved!before!my!brain!had!a!chance!to!
edit.!“No!one!likes!The!Donald’s!comb6over,!but!I!don’t!get!how!
shaving!your!head!hides!the!fact!that!you’re!bald.”!
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!
Drucker!tensed,!one!of!his!hands!balling!into!a!fist,!but!the!
corners!of!Taylor’s!mouth!turned!up,!and!he!looked!at!me!for!
the!first!time,!face!spreading!into!a!grin.!
!
“You! must! be! out! of! it,! man.! Shaved! heads! have! been! ‘in’!
ever! since! everybody! wanted! to! ‘be! like! Mike’—even! Bruce!
Willis.! Jordan! made! hairless! as! macho! as! hirsute,! if! not! the!
epitome!of!cool.”!
!
He! came! over! and! stuck! out! his! hand.! “Bob! Taylor.! I! saw!
you!play!once!when!I!was!a!kid.”!
!
Why! people! still! remembered! the! two! seasons! of! ball! I!
played! at! UW! always! managed! to! mystify! me.! I’d! been! good,!
not! great.! I’d! used! the! fact—and! the! few! resultant! sports!
connections—as! leverage,! when! necessary,! for! clients! of! the!
public!affairs!firm!I!once!worked!for.!But!I’d!spent!most!of!the!
intervening!years!trying!to!forget.!!
!
I!met!his!firm!grip,!trying!to!swallow!a!mouthful!of!foot.!
!
“You!got!sick!or!something,!came!down!with!some!weird–”!