Safe in His Hands

by Amy Ruttan

  “Everything is going to be fine. Dr. Devlyn is one of the best.” Charlotte turned away from Quinn, silently handing him the reins of her clinic and praying to God she had made the right decision.

  “Thank you,” Rebecca whispered, as her husband squeezed her hand.

  Charlotte stood back with George, feeling utterly useless.

  “Is Lorna on her way?” Charlotte asked.

  “Her contractions are coming close together,” Quinn said. “Doesn’t look like Lorna’s going to get here in time. Are you allergic to latex, Rebecca?”

  “No,” she said. “Not allergic to anything.”

  “Good.” Quinn turned to the sink and scrubbed his hands. Charlotte helped him by drying his hands and putting on a pair of gloves. Their eyes locked for a moment as he slipped his scarred hand into the glove. Charlotte couldn’t help but wonder if he’d be able to deliver the baby. She’d watched him do exercises yesterday, had watched Anernerk massage his bad hand. Would his hand be strong enough to hold such a fragile life?

  Step in.

  Only she didn’t. Charlotte didn’t want to frighten Rebecca and she didn’t want George to blab to anyone that she had doubts about Quinn, the man who was going to save Mentlana’s baby’s life.

  Quinn sat on the rolling stool and Charlotte adjusted the lamp. There was no time for modesty.

  Quinn preformed the internal. “Ten centimeters and fully effaced.” He looked up at Rebecca and smiled encouragingly. “Time to start pushing. Bear down. Now.”

  Rebecca nodded and began to push, as George counted with Mr. Grise.

  Charlotte stayed by Quinn’s side, watching a new life enter the world.

  Please, God. Please let it be an easy birth.

  She’d never seen Quinn deliver a child before. He hadn’t liked her to watch him during his residency and she’d been very busy with her own. But he was gentle as he urged Rebecca on. He guided the frightened woman through the birth with so much care and concern that Charlotte’s heart fluttered, and in this moment she felt very connected to him. For all his talk about power and position it was evident he was just as passionate about health care and his profession as she was.

  “Good. Take a deep breath and push. Hard, Rebecca. Hard.” He was easing the baby’s head out. “You’re doing great, Rebecca. Again.”

  Charlotte smiled behind her mask as the top of the head began to appear. Doctoring in a remote community was never so rewarding as at this moment. And Quinn had always questioned her about why she hadn’t specialized. Here, she had a taste of it all.

  Rebecca screamed, a gut-wrenching cry of agony, and Charlotte didn’t blame her. This moment was known as the “ring of fire” for a good reason.

  “Scalpel,” Quinn said. Charlotte handed him the blade and he made a small incision to control the tearing. His hand was strong and steady as he made the cut.

  “Come on, Rebecca. One more good push and your baby will be here,” Charlotte urged.

  Rebecca grunted as the head passed easily and the rest of the baby slipped into Quinn’s waiting hands.

  “A girl,” Charlotte announced as she stared in awe at the tiny little life so delicately cradled in Quinn’s hands. His gaze locked on her. She saw a glimmer of envy and longing mirrored there. Hope flared somewhere deep inside her. The baby took her first lusty cry of life and Quinn looked away.

  “Take the baby,” he said, his hands shaking a bit. Charlotte grabbed a blanket and reached down to hold the squawking infant.

  As she stared down at the baby, tears stung her eyes as she thought of her own lost child. Rebecca had been so brave having a baby up here, away from what most people considered civilization. Braver than she was, even for having a baby, something Charlotte was terrified to even entertain the notion of again because she couldn’t bear the thought of losing another child.

  Get a grip on yourself, Charlotte.

  She carefully placed the baby on Rebecca’s chest, and Quinn cut the cord once it had stopped pulsating. The proud father cuddled his new daughter while Quinn delivered the afterbirth and stitched Rebecca up.

  “Good job, Dr. Devlyn and Mom.” George grinned at the happy parents, but Charlotte could see they were oblivious to everything. Rebecca’s gaze was focused on her crying, thriving baby.

  She recorded the APGAR and rubbed ointment on the baby’s eyes to reduce infection. After that she gingerly placed the baby on the scale.

  “She’s seven pounds eight ounces.”

  Charlotte then took measurements of the baby. When five minutes had passed she recorded the APGAR again and gave the baby a vitamin K injection. The hospital in Iqaluit could do the heel stick tomorrow.

  Charlotte swaddled the baby and took her over to the proud parents. Rebecca’s arms were outstretched, tears streaming down her red cheeks. The new mother nuzzled her baby eagerly. A pang of longing rocked Charlotte to her core.

  Charlotte wanted that. More than anything. More than any fear of what might happen.

  “Thank you, Dr. James.”

  “It’s Charlotte. Everyone up here calls me Charley, though.”

  Rebecca grinned. “Charlotte. I like that name.”

  “I think it’s a perfect name for her,” Quinn smiled. “I’ve always loved that name.”

  Charlotte blushed and smiled at Quinn. His eyes were twinkling and for a moment it was like the years had never separated them, that the hurt was forgotten. He returned her smile before turning away with the tray of instruments and medical waste.

  “You can rest the night here, Mr. and Mrs. Grise. We’ll take care of you, and tomorrow George or I will fly you down to Iqaluit. We’ll need to notify the hospital that you’ve given birth here.”

  Rebecca nodded. “Thank you, Doctor... Thank you, Doc Charley.”

  “My pleasure.” Charlotte peeled off her gloves and began to scrub. “George, make sure you set up a recovery room for them. I think there’s a bassinet here. I always have stuff on hand. There’s also some diapers and formula, if needed, in the supply room.”

  “I’m on it.” George seemed to hesitate as he began to place instruments on a tray to be sterilized. “What happened to Dr. Devlyn?” he asked in whispered undertone.

  “He’s right...” Charlotte trailed off as her eyes scanned the room. He’d disappeared. “Probably went to clean up. He’s done his job.”

  “Of course. He was fantastic. It gives me hope he’ll help Mentlana.” George’s voice shook at the mention of his sister.

  A lump formed in Charlotte’s throat. “You okay to fly to Iqaluit tomorrow?” she asked, changing the subject.

  “Yep. My schedule is free.”

  “Good.”

  She left the room and shut the door. Taking a deep breath, she slid down to the floor. Her knees were knocking and exhaustion hit her in waves. Emotions and adrenaline were still rushing through her. It had been watching Quinn hold the baby that had brought back a flood of emotions she’d thought long gone. He had been so tender, for a man who had always insisted he didn’t want or particularly like kids, which had never made sense to her, given his chosen specialty.

  The door to the clinic opened and Lorna shuffled in. Her face was haggard and she looked worn out.

  “Am I too late?”

  Charlotte stood, her body protesting. “Healthy baby girl. Sorry for dragging you out of bed.”

  Lorna shook her head. “No problem. I’ll be glad when Lucy leaves soon to study midwifery. I’m getting too...”

  “Tired. You’re ready to retire.” Charlotte offered.

  Lorna smiled. “You’re just too polite to say old, Charlotte.”

  “You’re not old. Your mother, Anernerk, is old.”

  “I’ll be sixty-eight soon, well past retirement age.” Lorna slumped down in the waiting-room c
hair and Charlotte sat across from her.

  “You can crash here for the night instead of trudging back home.”

  Lorna smiled weakly. “I just might take you up on that offer, help the new parents out and give you some rest.”

  “Thanks. Even though I was nothing more than a glorified nurse, it was an amazing experience.”

  “Does it make you change your mind?”

  Charlotte dragged her hand through her hair. Lorna knew about her miscarriage and how Charlotte felt about becoming pregnant again. Charlotte blamed herself for losing the child. She had been an intern and had taxed her body way beyond its limits.

  That’s why she’d lost her baby.

  “No,” she answered uncertainly.

  As the only doctor for kilometers around she was just as stressed, and she wouldn’t lose another baby. She couldn’t. It would kill her.

  On the other hand, holding that baby tonight and watching Quinn cradling that tiny little life with all the care in the world had made her rethink the decision she’d made five years ago.

  If she was given the chance to carry and have another baby, she’d do so in a heartbeat.

  Lorna arched an eyebrow. “There is uncertainty there.”

  Charlotte shook her head and stood. “I’ll make you up a bed in the other recovery room.”

  Lorna shook her head. “Avoiding a touchy subject. Obstinate.”

  “You know, you sounded just like your mother, then.” Charlotte chuckled and walked down the hall.

  “Low, blow, Doc Charley. Really low blow. I’m old enough to be your mother.”

  “Keep talking...Anernerk.”

  Lorna let out a guffaw as Charlotte disappeared round the corner to the recovery room. She made up Lorna’s room and could hear George making up the other one. Charlotte helped him settle the happy parents and the baby in the larger recovery room, the one usually used to house two patients, and got Lorna settled in the room opposite.

  It was quite handy because Lorna was well versed in postpartum needs and she said she would keep watch on the new mother and baby during the night.

  George collapsed on the waiting-room couch and was snoring by the time Charlotte finished sterilizing the instruments and cleaning the exam room, not wanting Rosie to have a heart attack when she came in on Monday.

  As Charlotte closed down and turned off the lights, she stared at the door that connected to her home. It was slightly ajar and she could see the flicker of a television. Quinn was still awake.

  She wanted to see him, to wrap her arms around him and kiss him. To finish what had almost started earlier today, but fear froze her in her tracks.

  No. She couldn’t deal with him tonight.

  Instead, she grabbed her dinner, which had been parceled up from the diner, and wandered to her office, staring bleakly at the old couch that had adorned their apartment. Her eyes were heavy and the couch was surprisingly inviting. She locked the door to her office, peeled off her clothes and settled down on the couch, covering herself with the afghan she’d draped over Quinn only a day ago.

  She was absolutely exhausted and tried to drift off to sleep, but the damn blanket smelled like him.

  CHAPTER NINE

  SHOUTING ROUSED CHARLOTTE from her slumber. She stumbled to her feet and the container from dinner last night fell onto the floor, scattering a few fries onto the carpet. One squished under her foot when she stepped forward and it stuck to her sock in a cold, mushy clump, making her curse under her breath.

  Charlotte hopped on one foot to peer out the window. She gasped, not because it was snowing, which it was. It was the sight of Quinn outside in the snow that made her voice catch in her throat.

  Quinn’s outside? Voluntarily?

  He was kneeling down and in his hand appeared to be a very expensive camera with a large telescopic lens. The shouting was from some of the village kids, who were rocketing past him from the slope just outside her office.

  The clinic was on the far edge of town, nestled up against a slope, and because there were no houses on the one side, the village kids loved to come over and toboggan on nice days. When it was snowing big fat fluffy flakes, it was not as bitterly cold out as it would usually be.

  As a kid zoomed past Quinn, the camera would follow. He was photographing the children.

  I never knew he liked photography.

  Or children, for that matter.

  A smile quirked her lips as he moved the camera and urged a large sled of five kids down the hill. The children were laughing and he was making funny faces as the child at the back pushed off.

  Quinn cheered and disappeared behind the camera, getting ready to take his picture. Charlotte was extremely attracted to this side of him, a side she’d never been privileged to see before. Watching him out there now with the village kids warmed her heart.

  She left her office, changed her mushy sock, and freshened up quickly. She had her winter gear on in no time flat and was out the door to join him. There was no way she was going to miss this opportunity.

  There was no wind and it wasn’t bitterly cold when she stepped outside. It was just a nice winter day, with soft flakes floating down.

  “Watch out, Doc!” Charlotte jumped back as a sled full of laughing kids whizzed past her. Quinn stood and grinned at her, his cheeks rosy from the cold.

  “Good morning, or should I say, afternoon?”

  “What time is it?” She’d been in such a rush to get outside she hadn’t checked the time.

  “It’s one. Hey, hold up, guys. Doctor coming through.” Quinn held up his hands and the eager tobogganers paused, but with a few “Awwws” as Charlotte jogged across the path of danger to stand beside Quinn. “All right, go, guys!”

  With a shriek from one of the kids, the next sled set off and Quinn snapped a few shots as it whizzed by.

  “I’m impressed,” Charlotte said.

  “By what?”

  “You, out here in the dreaded ice and snow.”

  Quinn chuckled and he capped his camera lens. “I couldn’t resist it.”

  “I didn’t know you did photography.”

  Quinn shrugged. “It’s no big deal. I dabble a bit.” He shielded the glare of the sun from the screen on the back and flicked through the images. They were beautiful photographs of the kids and other scenery. He’d also managed to take a shot of the northern lights. It was a stunning photograph that captured the green-and-purples hues of the aurora borealis dancing over the village.

  “These are beautiful. When did you take that?” she asked, pointing to the image.

  “Last night. You know, I’ve never seen the aurora borealis. I never bothered when we lived in Yellowknife, and when I was in Manhattan I kicked myself constantly for not making the time.” Quinn switched off his camera. “Light pollution in the big city sucks.”

  “What time did you get up?” she asked, changing the subject from the city, which was a point of contention between them.

  “About nine. George was taking the Grises down to Iqaluit. He was going to wake you, but you looked so darned cute huddled up on that old couch, food scattered all over the place.”

  Charlotte groaned, embarrassed he’d caught her flaked out and vulnerable instead of poised and sophisticated. “Thanks for doing that.”

  “No problem.” His eyes glinted as he watched the kids haul their sleds back up the hill. “You know, I’ve never tried that.”

  “What, tobogganing?”

  Quinn shook his head. “Nope, never. My parents wouldn’t take me or even buy me a sled.”

  “I thought your dad was very much into sports. At least, that’s what you told me.”

  “Hockey, yes, sledding, no. You can’t win a gold medal for sledding.”

  “You can for bobsledding,”
she teased.

  Quinn shrugged. “He wasn’t much for being a team player. I just had to be the best.”

  A pang of sympathy hit her. Quinn may have had two parents but he hadn’t had a fun childhood. Some of Charlotte’s best memories of her and her father had been out on the snow, sledding and snowshoeing. Charlotte grabbed his hand and tugged him towards the hill. “We’re going.”

  “What?” He chuckled. “You’re nuts. What about my camera?”

  “Jenny!” Charlotte called out to Wavell’s younger sister. She came bounding up, out of breath.

  “Yeah, Doc Charley?”

  “Can you hold Dr. Devlyn’s camera while I take him on your sled down the hill?”

  Jenny’s face broke into a huge smile. “Yeah, I can do that!”

  “Charlotte...” Quinn started as she took the camera from him and handed it to Jenny. “I don’t know.”

  “Come on, you big wimp!”

  He raised his eyebrows. “Wimp, eh?”

  She screeched as he lunged for her. She grabbed Jenny’s small sled and ran up the hill, Quinn following her. When they reached the top she sat down. “Sit behind me and hold on.”

  “How do we push off?” he asked as he sat down, his arms wrapping around her.

  “With your feet. But once we’re going, tuck them up so your feet don’t slow us down.”

  “Gotcha.”

  “Ready?” she asked.

  “Yep. Let’s get this over with.”

  Charlotte could hear the kids shrieking and laughing as she dug her feet in and pushed off. The sled picked up speed fast from their combined weight and they rocketed down the hill, past Jenny and the clinic. Charlotte screamed with pure joy as the wind whipped at her face and the cold air sucked the breath from her lungs.

  Quinn yelled and stuck his feet out as they headed towards the only road in Cape Recluse. The sled careened to the side and they were tossed out. Charlotte did a small roll and landed on her back. Quinn rolled and landed on top of her, pinning her to the snow.

  “Are you all right?” he asked breathlessly. “And my apologies for the excessive bad language.”