Silence followed the whirlwind of questions. About the time Nikki thought she wasn’t going to answer, Dani cleared her throat.
“You’ve met him. Nikki hasn’t. Forget I said anything.”
Jackie gasped then laid a hand on her twin’s arm. “Reid?” She looked at Nikki. “Reid McAllister. He’s the twins’—”
“I don’t want to talk about him.” Her knuckles were tight around the steering wheel, and her jaw was set as she stared down the road.
“Okay. We were talking about Adrian and Nikki anyway.”
With a groan, Nikki closed her eyes. Was she really just thinking how much she missed her sisters? “What about you, Jackie? Any guys in your life?”
“Come on, Nikki. You and Adrian would make a great couple.”
“First of all, I’m not staying, and I can guarantee he is not a casual-dater kind of guy. Second, I think he did ask me out, but it was so awkward I’m not really sure. And third, he’s younger than me.”
“By three measly years. Wait, he did ask you?”
“What do you mean awkward? Like how?”
She lifted her leg to stretch it out along the back seat. “He invited you both to come along. My knee is hurting. I need to put ice on it as soon as we get home. Jackie, are we dropping you off at your house or you staying the night again?”
“Oh, no you don’t. You could care less about your knee, so don’t start using it now.”
She blew out a puff of air, forcing stray strands of hair out of her eyes. They were going to make her talk. “He started with Mia having a sleepover, and how he worries too much. Then he said he has a friend playing in a band and wondered if I liked live music.”
“He invited us? That’s bad. What did you say?” Danica turned on her blinker.
“Gwyn came up with her car problems and that was it.”
“He did ask you out though. How cute.” Jackie hit her twin’s shoulder.
Danica laughed. “I think I was the last date he had, and that was four years ago. It was a disaster. He had to be nervous.”
“And you don’t find me going out with him a bit uncomfortable?” Nikki couldn’t believe she was even contemplating going on a date with a guy that took her sister out.
“Oh no. We’re friends and help each other out as single parents. He’s involved with the 4-H Club, the church youth program and a mentor with the teen-parent program in Uvalde. He’s a great guy.” She shrugged. “It just didn’t click between us. You know?” Her gaze cut to the rearview mirror. “Right now in my life, I need to focus on the girls. At the time, I still had Reid in my head. You need to date a nice guy and get over the last jerk.”
Jackie turned again. “Adrian is really the best. Maybe he’s always liked you. A lot of the guys liked you in high school, but you weren’t interested in anyone.”
No, she had been all into a guy who was using her. She allowed him to treat her like a dirty secret. “Maybe he’s too nice. I’m a train wreck.”
Danica snorted as she pulled into the long drive to the family home where they grew up. “You can’t have done anything worse than me. I mean, come on. I went off to college and came home alone with twins.” She jammed the beast into Park. They all sat there in the dark. Jackie removed her seat belt and wrapped Danica in her arms.
“And now we have two more beautiful girls in our family. Which is good because I don’t think I’m ever having kids, and at the rate Nikki is going, she’ll never make me an aunt. She has her life all together and doesn’t need a man.”
Her stomach flopped and punched. Pressing her hands tightly against her middle didn’t help. If she didn’t say something now, she probably never would. It wasn’t fair that they didn’t know the truth. “Danica, I’m so proud of you and how you handled the situation. I’ve done worse, but I ran and hid from everyone.”
The twins looked at her. They both reached across the seat and held out their hands until Nikki joined them and formed their triangle. Jackie smiled. “The Triad. Remember you started this when we were little and said we would always have each other no matter what? It’s for you too, big sister.”
She nodded. There was no gentle way to start this, so she jumped in with both feet. “Back in high school? I didn’t leave my senior year because of Dad’s ex-wife.” She heard the bitterness in her own voice. Filling her lungs to capacity, she held her breath before forcing it all out. “It was easy to blame it on Sheila because we were fighting all the time, but I...” Each of the twins squeezed their hands around her wrist. The words lodged in her throat, threatening her ability to breathe. It was just mental. She could do this. “I was pregnant, and I didn’t want Daddy to know.”
Lifting her chin, she looked up. Danica and Jackie looked at her as if she had spoken another language. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, both girls jumped out of the car at the same time. The warmth of their touch vanished. That was it. They were gone.
Before another thought could form, they had the back doors open and were scrambling inside to hold her like they would never let her go. Her eyes burned and her vision blurred. She blinked a couple of times before admitting she had tears trying to escape. They had her arms pinned and she couldn’t wipe the senseless things away.
Danica leaned back and used her thumb to clear the wet trail off Nikki’s cheek. “What happened to the baby?”
“Our great-aunt Gloria became my legal guardian and helped set up an adoption. Her grandson and his wife wanted to adopt, but they were on a waiting list so long they had given up. When she went to them, they were so excited and the baby was actually family, so that was a good thing. It was a little boy. They named him Parker.”
“So it was an open adoption? Why didn’t you tell us?”
“I still don’t understand why you left. Who’s the father?” They spoke so fast and on top of each other she wasn’t sure who said what.
“I was the strong one, the one who held the family together when Momma died. I didn’t think Daddy could handle it along with all of Sheila’s drama. I just...ran. I couldn’t face him, couldn’t see the hurt and disappointment in his eyes.” She swallowed down the acid that threatened to spill over. She was in this far. She might as well tell them everything. “Tommy Miller.”
In unison the twins gasped. “Did he...?”
“No. No, it was nothing like that. I was in love and he told me that Vickie didn’t really love him, but their parents were pushing them together. He needed Mr. Lawson’s recommendation to get into law school and the scholarships he wanted. He said if I could just wait, that once we left for college it would be just the two of us. He told me I kept him sane, and I believed every word.” Head down, she squeezed her eyes shut. How could she have been so stupid not to see he had used her? She had been his dark secret.
“Hey. What’s going on out here?” All three jumped at Sammi’s voice. Their little sister stood just outside the door behind Jackie. “Everything okay? Are y’all crying?” She moved in closer, but then backed up. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“Oh no, it’s fine.” Nikki reached past Jackie and held her hand out. Her baby sister wasn’t a baby anymore. A grown woman stood in front of her. “We’re having a sister talk and you should be here.”
Jackie twisted to make room for Sammi in the tight space.
Sammi wrapped her arms around her middle. “So what are you talking about?”
Danica and Jackie both looked at Nikki. She didn’t have another word left in her.
Clearing her throat, Jackie started backing out the Suburban. “We should continue in the house. I’m too old to be hiding in the back seat.”
Sammi followed. “But why are you all crying?”
The twins exchanged a look then turned to Nikki. With a quick nod, she gave them permission to tell their little sister. Danica s
tarted the story and Jackie finished.
Sammi stopped. “That’s why you left us, Nikki? Y’all knew?”
Danica put her arm around Sammi, but she pulled away. “No. No one knew.”
Glancing among them all, Jackie looked to Nikki for help. “We just now found out.”
The hurt in Sammi’s eyes gave Nikki another reason to feel guilty. She wanted to hug her, but the don’t-come-close look warned her to keep her distance. “So cousins on your mom’s side have him?”
Nikki managed a nod and stepped forward, hand reaching for Sammi.
Her baby sister took a step back. “Daddy blamed Momma for you leaving.” Sam bit her bottom lip and looked toward the house before leveling a stare at Nikki again. “So it wasn’t my mother’s fault?”
“No, she’s not the reason I left. I’m so sorry.” There wasn’t anything left to say.
“We have to tell Daddy. He has always blamed Momma.”
Nikki nodded. With a sigh, she put an arm around Sammi and held on tight this time. She wasn’t going to lose her baby sister. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I need to tell him.”
Tears in her eyes, Sammi nodded.
The twins wrapped their arms around them. She found herself in the middle of a warm hug from all three sisters. God, please forgive me for not having enough faith to be honest about my mistakes.
This was why she needed to stay away from Adrian and the temptation of wanting what she couldn’t afford to risk. Once she told her father, she was sure he would want her to leave. All the years he had blamed Sheila because of her mistake... Would he forgive her?
Her sisters surrounded her in love, but she couldn’t see their stubborn and stern father letting go of the past so easily.
The front porch light came on. “What are y’all doing out there in the dark? Girls, get in the house.”
With her sisters walking by her side, she passed through the front door of her childhood home. She needed to keep her focus on her plan. Get better and get the funds to buy her own business. A business to fill her days with adventures of the physical kind, far from Clear Water and Adrian De La Cruz. He was dangerous to her heart.
Chapter Eight
Adrian took the smoothed wood from George. He glanced over at Nikki. She’d barely said hi when he walked into the store this morning. Now she seemed to be avoiding him by organizing the old chairs, separating the broken ones from the solid ones. Her whole body moved as she sanded the top of a huge abandoned pine table.
Did he ask her out again or just wait for her to say something? Normally he would talk to George, but he hesitated, which worried him also. The song “I Just Can’t Wait to Be King” sounded from his brother’s front shirt pocket. Nikki looked at them with a raised eyebrow. He had to laugh as his brother’s dark skin turned red. Should he save his brother’s man card and explain the fairy-tale song? George stepped into the staircase.
The new polished wood warmed Adrian’s hands as he lined it up. Now would be a good time to ask. He leaned the plank against the exposed rock and turned to face her.
His twin came up the steps. “That was Mrs. Miller, again. She says we left some tools in the sheep barn. I know we didn’t. Those are her husband’s old tools.”
Adrian shook his head. “Go. She probably just needs someone to talk to. I can finish this. After lunch we can start taking down the old drywall in the rest of the rooms.”
“Sure you’re not just looking to get rid of me?” Eyebrows wiggled followed by laughter that had Adrian gritting his teeth. “And you need to teach your daughter about the privacy of people’s belongings.” George waved his phone.
If Adrian had anything with some weight, he’d throw it at his brother’s retreating back. She could think whatever she wanted about his brother. He wasn’t going to explain the cartoon ringtone.
With his twin gone, he joined Nikki at the table she rubbed down. He ran his hand along the grain she had already polished. The wood glowed with new life, but a few stains and flaws still remained. He liked the evidence of all the people who had used the table in the past, bits of stories embedded into the wood. Nikki kept her attention on her work. She acted as if he wasn’t in the room, let alone standing next to her.
“George’s ringtone was Mia’s doing.” His twin owed him. “She gets a kick out of messing with our settings since I won’t let her have a phone of her own. It’s her little revenge against us.”
She chuckled. “I like your daughter. It did surprise me. I always thought of George as more of a classic guy, Patsy Cline and Hank Williams.”
“Speaking of music. Last night I asked if you wanted to have dinner with me.”
She looked up at him and smiled. That had to be a good sign. He leaned a hip on the edge of the table and crossed his arms. “Well, I kind of asked. So now I’m asking you on a real date. You know, the kind grown-ups do. Just you and me. No sisters, brothers or daughters.” He watched her face, but she kept her head down, focused on the table. “I’d think we’d have fun together.”
“As long as you know I’m leaving. Once I’m one hundred percent and have enough money saved up, I’m going back to Arizona.”
“So it’s a date. Next Thursday?”
“Why not?” She shrugged and looked up at him with a slight grin before going back to the old table.
Not a huge endorsement. He wanted her to look at him again. “What’s the money for?”
“Money?” She was looking at him, but confusion marked her eyes.
“You said you were here to save some money. I was wondering what you were saving for.”
“Oh.” And back to the table her attention went. “I want to start my own outfitters company, wild adventure tours. How long have you and George run your own business?”
Before he could answer, a tentative knock warned them that they were not alone. Adrian looked up and blinked a couple of times. There was no way he was seeing this correctly. Charlotte Walker stood in the open door frame. Her hair was lighter, but it was the person who’d walked out on him and his daughter over ten years ago.
Numbness gave way to a sudden pulse of blood driving through his veins. What was she doing here?
“Hi, Adrian. It’s me, Charlotte.”
“I know who you are. What I don’t know is why you’re here.”
From the edge of his vision he saw Nikki stand. “Hello, Charlotte.” She held her hand out. “I’m Nikki Bergmann.”
Charlotte gave her a tight smile while shaking her hand. “I remember you. Your sister told me Adrian was up here. I’m sorry to barge in like this, but I need to talk to Adrian, and I thought this would be a safe place.”
“Sure.” She turned to Adrian. “I’ll go downstairs for a bit. Let me know when you want to get back to work.”
“Stay.” His gaze stayed on Mia’s mother. “I’ll be back to work soon enough, and I’d rather not be alone.” He forced his hands to relax from the knotted fists they had made when she walked into the room. Flexing his fingers, he looked at Nikki. “Stay, please.”
“Okay.” She moved to stand behind the table.
“Why are you here?” Breathe, breathe.
“I recently finished college and have a nursing job in Kerrville. I even have my own place. I, um... I’ve been sober for three years now.” She pulled a coin out of her pocket and showed it to him as if it proved something.
His stomach turned. “You’re living in Kerrville?” That was too close.
She nodded with quick jerks, looking a little desperate. “Yeah, I finally have my life together.”
“Great, but I still don’t know why you’re here, at my place of work.” In his gut he was afraid he did know. Mia. She wanted Mia.
“I’ve been working with a therapist, and we agree that I’m ready to meet my daughter.”
“She’s not your daughter anymore. You gave up all rights and walked out on us. You haven’t called or written. Nothing for ten years. Now you want to meet her? You didn’t even want to hold her on the day she was born, the day you gave birth to her.”
“I wasn’t ready, and I knew if I looked at her I wouldn’t be able to let her go. I had to leave. I’m sorry, but I did what I thought was best for all of us at the time.”
Rage that he thought he’d got over ten years ago boiled from the pit of his stomach, nearly choking him. “I gave up everything and all you gave up was my daughter. It’s too late. We don’t need you now.”
Hand out, she stepped closer to him. “I know I hurt you and I’m sorry, but I was too selfish to be a mother. I was also alone. I didn’t have the kind of support that surrounded you. My dad was a raging alcoholic. My mom only wanted to keep him happy. I couldn’t count on them for support. You had your mom, dad and George, not to mention your sisters. They hated me.” She looked down, dropping her hand.
He just stood there, letting the silence hang between them. She started twisting her hands, acting scared.
She had the nerve to lie then act as if he was being too hard on her. “Don’t you dare play the victim here.” The blood pounded in his ears.
He needed to settle down and get her out of here, but it was like all the anger he had pushed down now had the opportunity to lash out and say all the things he had wanted to say to her ten years ago, but she had left without a word. Just a note and the note was long gone, ripped to shreds.
“Now you’re making stuff up. They didn’t hate you. But none of that matters. You need to leave. Mia doesn’t need a mother. You decided that when you left us.”
Her gaze darted to Nikki then back to him. “You had the whole town. I was an outsider who dared to ruin the local star’s future. I didn’t have what you had. Adrian, I didn’t have anyone.”
“You had me.” His fist slammed into his chest. “My family was more than willing to take you in and help with the baby. You didn’t want our help.” He stood closer and pointed a finger at her. “You just wanted the next party.”
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