I’ve refused to answer the phone when she calls, and I delete her texts, but she won’t give up. I know her well enough to know that she’s going to force something soon. Hopefully we’ll have time later tonight for me to tell Quinn everything. I need her to know what really went on, and what’s still going on now.
I pull into the parking lot of Owen and Candi’s converted warehouse. Their place is hella cool; I’d love to have something like it with my woman. Well, she isn’t currently mine, but I feel like I’m getting closer to having her back completely. I’ve let her set the pace, and I’m pretty sure she’s been happy.
The sex has been awesome, especially the times I’ve made love to her slow and sweet. That’s not our usual way lately. She seems to need me rough and hard, like we’re imprinting ourselves on each other. But, I’ve insisted on going slow sometimes, so she could feel the love that she needs from me. I think we were both surprised with how awesome it was, feeling that slow build, and getting each other there without the desperation of needing a fast release. Hearing her softly say my name as she came those times, instead of her usual screaming it, almost broke my heart and then put it back together again.
I’ve got a smile on my face when I step off the elevator into Owen’s apartment. “Hey, man, glad you could make it,” Scott tells me.
“Thanks for inviting me.”
“Quinn has become like a sister to me, Zane, so you better tread carefully,” Ryan warns me.
“I am.”
He nods, and I let out the breath I’d been holding. I’m a pretty tough guy, but Ryan Griffin is not someone you want to mess with. He’s built like a tank and is extremely loyal to the people he cares about. Quinn is, apparently, now one of those people, which makes me happy, even if he does scare the shit out of me.
“Has anything changed?” Owen asks me.
“Nope. I still tell her I love her every day. We make love every night. Sometimes we eat dinner and hang out beforehand. And sometimes she sews while I watch TV, until she’s ready for me. We sleep in the same bed every night, so I guess that’s something.”
“It’s more than I gave Chloe, that’s for damn sure,” Ryan reminds me. “And I felt guilty as fuck the whole time. I’m guessing Quinn feels guilty, too. Just give her time.”
“I plan to. I’ll give her all the time she needs.”
We sit down to play, and it’s really nice to be hanging out with these guys. The Griffins are cool dudes. I’ve met their friends Sean and Danny a few times before and liked them. I leave Owen’s place a few hours later with a lot less money than I came with. Scott wasn’t kidding when he said that Owen and Sean would clean me out. It’s cool, though. I didn’t take more than I could afford to lose.
* * *
Quinn
I really love this group of girls. I’d met them all before, but when my world fell apart, they came together to help hold me up. Every one of them spent time with me, talking to me and holding me as I cried. That’s what they do for each other, and I’m so thankful that they welcomed me into their group. I’m a little worried about what they’re going to say about me and Zane now, though.
I haven’t been at Erika’s long before the questions start. Yasmin is, of course, first. “Are you still just sleeping with Zane?”
“Umm…yeah…well, kind of. We eat together and watch TV sometimes.”
Chloe narrows her eyes at me. I’ve sensed that she’s been upset with me, but I don’t know why. “Is that all you want from him? Sex?”
“Yes. No. No. I want all of him, but I’m scared.”
“There’s something you don’t know about me and Ryan, Quinn. When I first came back to him, he only wanted sex from me. I slept with him and got on my knees for him for weeks while he dated other girls. It was horrible and degrading, but I thought I deserved it for hurting him. And I was honestly just so thankful to have something with him. Ryan still feels bad about it, even though he’s the perfect husband now.”
“I-I’m not dating anyone else. It’s not the same thing.” I look around, and the girls give me sad smiles. “I just can’t trust him yet.”
“Maybe it’s not exactly the same thing, but I hope you make a decision soon. After what happened at the wedding, I didn’t think I’d ever side with Zane, but on this I do. I love you, you know I do. But this is just wrong.” She smiles at me and walks into the kitchen, leaving me standing there, stunned.
I look around back to Yasmin. “Do you think it’s wrong, what I’m doing?”
She sighs and then looks me in the eye. “Yes. I do. No one was angrier at Zane, than me, for what he did. But I was there when he called Scott after you two first slept together and you told him you weren’t his girlfriend. He sounded so devastated when he said he didn’t want to just have sex with you. We convinced him to go along with it, because we thought you’d want more.”
I slump into the nearest chair. I want him to hurt, but then at the same time, I don’t. Deep down, I know I was wrong, but I let my fears override everything. And he did everything I wanted because he does love me.
“I see you beating yourself up. Don’t. We’ve all made mistakes with the guys,” Candi tells me. “Now that Chloe and Yasmin have told you how Zane’s hurting, you can fix this if you want.”
“I do. I will.”
“Good. Now hold my baby. Hope will cure anything that ails you.”
I take the beautiful little girl from her and cuddle her close. At almost six months old, she’s definitely got a personality of her own, cuddling me back like she knows I need it. The next few hours go by pretty fast, as we watch the classic 90’s movie, Ever After. I laugh and joke with Erika, Sam, and Olivia, as well as the other girls. Chloe and I hug it out, and I thank her for her advice. The only person who’s kept her distance a little is Alex.
Erika tells everyone when Sean texts her that the guys are on their last poker hand, so we all get ready to leave. As I grab my coat from the closet, Alex comes up to me. She looks around to make sure no one is near us. “If you aren’t dating anyone else, why have you been out with Miles several times?”
“Miles? We’re good friends.”
“He doesn’t have female friends.”
“I guess I’m the first.”
“Really? You haven’t slept with him?”
“Really. I haven’t slept with anyone except Zane in seven years.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“Why would you care if I was sleeping with Miles?”
“No reason.”
She starts to walk away, but I grab her arm. “Listen, Alex. I love Miles, but he’s not the type of guy you should be thinking about getting with. He doesn’t want a relationship. I don’t know if he ever will.”
“Thanks for the advice, Quinn, but I’m an adult now, and I can do what I want.”
“I know that, Alex.” I’m a little shocked by her outburst. She’s always been so level-headed. “I’m sorry I upset you.”
“It’s fine. I know how he is.” She hugs me and then walks out the door.
I follow soon after. I need to beat Zane home so I can surprise him. I hope it’s not too late.
Chapter 5
Zane
I’m not expecting to see Quinn leaning up against the wall between our apartments when I got off the elevator, but there she is. Her eyes brighten when she sees me. I hate to disappoint her, but I just can’t do this tonight.
“Hi, Z. How was your poker game?”
“I lost.”
“Oh. Well, maybe I can make your night a little better.” She reaches out to run her hand over my arm.
“Not tonight, Q. I’m really tired.”
“Okay. Umm…well…I just wanted to…umm…tell…you. You know what? Never mind.”
As tired as I am of all of this, I can’t stand to see her upset. Plus, I need to know what’s got her so stressed out. I reach for her and hug her close. “Tell me whatever you want. I want to hear what you have to say, even if it’s bad.”
> She looks up into my eyes and smiles. “It’s not bad. At least I don’t think it is.”
“Yeah?” I rub my thumb over her chin and kiss her lightly on the lips. “Then hit me with it.”
“I love you, Zane.”
I freeze as I look into her eyes, searching for the truth. It’s there. Honestly, I knew it was, but I was worried that she’d never say it to me again. “Thank you.”
“I’m sorry I haven’t said it before. I was so scared, but then when Chloe told me how she felt when Ryan would only have sex with her, well, I-I just knew I needed to tell you.”
“This isn’t Chloe and Ryan’s situation, Q.”
“No, but I was still pretty mean.”
I won’t lie to her. “Yeah. You were.”
“You were going to give up, right? That’s why you were going to turn me down, isn’t it?”
“No. I was never going to give up. Never. I just needed some time to come to terms with the fact that is seemed like you weren’t going to want more.”
“God. I’m so sorry I made you think that. Feel that. I want everything with you, Z. Everything.”
“You sure?”
“Yes. Totally and completely sure.” She bites her lip and looks nervous. “Can I be your girlfriend?”
“No.”
“No? Oh. Okay. Umm…I’m gonna go.”
I drop to one knee. “Q. I want you to be my fiancé, not just my girlfriend.”
“Oh my God.”
“Will you marry me?” I hold out the ruby ring that Owen helped me make for her.
“Yes.”
She’s crying as she drops to her knees in front of me. I slide the ring on her finger and kiss her sweetly. After a few minutes, I pull us both to our feet and pick her up. I carry her straight to my bed and lay her down gently.
“Tonight’s going to be slow and gentle, Q. I need to make love to you.”
“I won’t argue tonight. I want you to make love to me.”
I smile before bending to kiss her again. As I lick her lips, she helps me take of her t-shirt and jeans. Then she helps me with mine. I move back to look at her in her beautiful coral lace bra and panties, with the ink I gave her on her arms, breasts and stomach. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”
“Show me, Zane. I need you to show me.”
I don’t hesitate as I unclasp her bra and push it to the side. I lean up higher and nibble on her neck, then make my way across her shoulders to her collarbone. The top of her chest gets some of my attention before I move lower and take her left nipple into my mouth. I’m sucking, licking, and biting her as she bucks up underneath me. I switch sides and continue alternating for several minutes.
It’s time to go lower. I nip at her ribs and swirl my tongue in her belly button before reaching her hips. Then hook my fingers into her panties and pull them down just enough to see her glistening and ready for me. I leave the panties at her knees to constrict her a little, as I lick her lips and suck her clit into my mouth. She moans and grabs my head to push me down. I smile as I lick her wetness up. She’s trying to move her legs, but can’t with her panties holding her. I stop a moment to push them down, and she spreads her legs wide for me.
It only takes a couple more minutes, and just one finger, to have her screaming my name and pulling me up her body. I enter her in one slow thrust as she takes my lips, kissing me hard. I’ll let our kisses get intense, but I’m keeping things slow down south. It’s a beautiful torture as I slide in and out, inch by inch. It’s worth it though. I know that when I come, it’s going to be explosive and crazy.
We continue kissing as I feel us both start to build. I remove one of her hands from my hair and place it between us. She starts to circle her clit, like I wanted, as I move my hand back up to play with her nipples. I pinch her hard as I thrust deep and she goes over again. The feel of her convulsing around my cock, as her body goes crazy beneath me, pushes me over after her. I don’t remember ever coming as hard, or as long, as I do this time. I go so long that it triggers a third orgasm from Quinn before I collapse on top of her.
“Damn, baby. That was…just wow.”
“Who would’ve thought a ring could make it that much better.”
I roll to the side and pull her onto my chest. “Do you like it?”
“I fucking love it. It’s so beautiful and unique. Where did you find it?”
“Actually, I made it. With Owen’s help.”
“You made it? That’s just…just…oh I’m so going down on you once I get some strength back.”
“I won’t argue about that, but you don’t need to. You said ‘yes’ and that’s all I need. Ever.”
“I love you so much. Thank you for coming back for me and not giving up.”
“Thank you for giving me the chance to win you back. I love you, too.”
I cuddle her up in my arms, and we both fall asleep. I didn’t get my blow job, but I could care less. I got my woman and nothing’s better than that. Now I just need to tell her about Whitney and Chicago. We agreed on tomorrow, and I can’t wait for her to know everything. I need her to understand, even if it doesn’t forgive what I did.
* * *
Quinn
We fell asleep before I could keep my promise to Zane, so I wake him up with my mouth in the morning. “Fuck, Q,” he tells me as he wakes up and starts thrusting into my mouth.
I squeeze his balls, using my other hand to pump while I take him as far into my mouth as possible. Less than a minute after he’s awake, he’s coming hard, the hot liquid coating my throat on the way down. “Mmm. You taste so good.”
“Not as good as you, baby.”
Before I can even register it, I’m on top of his face reaching for the headboard. He’s not slow and sweet right now. He attacks my pussy and clit. There are fingers, tongue, and teeth working on me immediately. Combined with how turned on I was already from having him in my mouth, I don’t last even a minute. “Zane!” I scream as I ride his mouth to completion.
“Now that’s the way to wake up,” he says as he pulls me down on top of him.
“You didn’t have to do that.”
“I love doing that. You know it.” I do. I smile at him before he captures my lips.
I feel him getting hard again and lift myself up over his erection. He guides himself into me and I ride us both into another round of explosive orgasms. We would probably stay in bed all day, but I have to get to work. We go another round in the shower before I leave for next door to get dressed. Zane hands me a breakfast sandwich as I step out of my apartment.
“Go kick some interior design ass, babe. When you get back, I’ll help you with your sewing if you want.”
“You’ll cut my patterns?”
“Of course. I love helping you.”
“Thanks. I’ll see you later.”
“Don’t forget that we’re talking tonight. I really want you to know everything.”
“I haven’t forgotten. I’m ready to hear it all.”
We kiss and say our “I love yous” before I get on the elevator. I’m smiling as I step off onto Ryan’s floor. As I walk to my workspace, I can’t help but look down at my ring. It’s a beautiful square cut ruby surrounded by a gold band engraved with images from old-school tattoos. Hearts, birds, ribbons, crosses—they’re all on there. It’s breathtaking and the fact that Zane made it just makes it even more special.
“Quinn, is that an engagement ring?” I look up to see Chloe looking at me, her eyes wide.
“Yeah. It is. I took your advice and told Zane I loved him. He got down on one knee and gave me this.”
I hold my hand out and she takes it, looking at the ring. “It’s beautiful. And unique.”
“He made it. I guess Owen helped.”
“Wow. I’m really happy for you.” She pulls me into a hug and then steps back. “Now I feel better about being such a bitch last night. I was coming over here to apologize.”
“You weren’t being a bitch. I needed to realize w
hat I was doing and how I was hurting us both. You helped me do that.”
“Everything’s coming together for you. The store, now Zane. I didn’t ask you about your trip last night, either. Did you get some awesome fabrics?”
“I did. I can’t wait to start working on the dresses.”
“I can’t wait to buy a bunch of them.”
“Thanks again for being so supportive and letting me stay here a couple days a week.”
“I love working with you, Quinn, but I know interiors aren’t your dream. I appreciate the fact that I can still borrow your talent while you pursue your real love.”
“Borrow away,” I tell her with a laugh.
She steps into my office and goes over plans for the latest building with me. Ryan will break ground after the Tucson building opens. We’ll be going back for the opening parties, and I can’t wait to have Zane there with me. I’ve already planned my dresses for each party and I’m honestly looking forward to the formal industry party the most. I designed myself, and my friends, awesome ball gowns. My man will have to be in a tux. He rarely dresses up, but when he does, look out! I mean, seriously, I’ve seen a few women almost faint at the sight. I might have been one of them.
After Chloe leaves, I shore up all the courage I have and call my parents. I know they’re not going to take the engagement well. They treated Zane like a son. Loved him like a son. But when he walked out on me, well let’s just say I had to stop my dad from going after him. With his Glock. I love them and understand that they want to protect me, but I know I made the right decision when I told Zane I’d marry him. I would never be happy with anyone else while I had a chance with him. I’m both relieved and disappointed when neither one of my parents answers their phones. I guess I’ll just try again later.
I’m just getting ready to leave for the day when my phone rings. I see that it’s Maggie Griffin calling and answer it with a smile. “Hi Maggie.”
Designing the Love Page 4