RECYCLED MEMORY

by Richardson, SH

  The regulars started to show up right on cue; I could almost set my watch by them. Bob and Lucile, the construction workers from the next town over, and of course Chet, the local panhandler who always managed to scrape up enough change for a cup of coffee every morning. Nothing ever changed with these guys; they sat in the same seats, ordered the same lousy meals, and somehow managed to make me laugh during my roughest of days. There were times when I felt so alone, as if the world would open up and swallow me whole and no one would give a shit if I disappeared. Then I’d get to work, and my days were filled with hours of shit talking, over-the-top sexual innuendos, and loud obnoxious banter. I realized early on why being here brought on such a strong sense of peace; it wasn’t hard. It reminded me of a familiar place where I was no longer allowed to visit. Where my heart had been ripped from my chest, and where dreams died while love faded away. The diner was my junkyard now, and my customers deserved to have their fresh coffee served with a smile.

  Too bad it tasted like toxic waste.

  The crowd dispersed quickly with promises to return the next day. Odie was busy catering to Marcus’s every whim; she even went so far as to line his lap with napkins, so he wouldn’t spill any crumbs from the dry-ass sandwich he’d ordered. I was tempted to save him from her unwanted attention, but the sour look on his face every time she stopped by his table was just too funny to pass up. It served him right for sitting there all morning playing watch dog when I told him it was completely unnecessary. I shot him a knowing smirk while I reached beneath the counter for more napkins. The stupid cow bell over the door rang out with an annoying clank, a sign that a new customer had arrived.

  “I’ll be right with you,” I yelled without looking. Once I grabbed the pack of napkins, I stood with my usual stranger smile and froze.

  “Take your time, Maribel Laine, I’m in no hurry.”

  Whatever snarky response I might have had died on my lips when I took one look at the man sitting before me. He was symmetrically beautiful, dark hair complimented his dark eyes, sharp lines to his jaw and cheekbones, stylishly dressed in classic Italian. He was breathtaking. Young but not naïve, he’d seen some shit in his lifetime. The man exuded power without so much as trying, and he’d said my name as if we were long-lost friends.

  “I’m sorry. Do I know you?” I probed.

  “Darragh MacCabe, very nice to meet you.”

  He extended his hand in greeting, and I shook it with trepidation. Marcus caught my look of unease and made his way over with a spirited Odie hot on his heels. I warned her with a shake of my head not to fuck around before she made it to the counter. Marcus’s nostrils flared with every menacing step he took toward MacCabe. His right hand was hidden inside his jacket and could only mean one thing.

  “You got two seconds to state your business, fucknuts,” Marcus hissed.

  “Ah…the dutiful boyfriend who shot one of my men in the leg. I’m Darragh MacCabe, and you must be Marcus Mecken. Ex-Marine Special Forces and current love interest of Ms. Maribel Laine’s, I presume. Very nice to make your acquaintance.”

  Odie inhaled sharply when she heard MacCabe call Marcus by name. I’d confided in her a time or two about the man who had broken my heart years ago, and now she could finally add a face to the legend.

  “I said…STATE. YOUR. FUCKING. BUSINESS,” Marcus repeated with a dangerous undertone to his voice. The only hint that MacCabe was even the slightest bit rattled was the flexing of his hands into fists at his sides. He recovered quickly and got right back on track with the purpose of his little visit.

  “I just stopped by to discuss a little business with Ms. Laine…” he tried to downplay.

  “You got something to say you, say it to me, motherfucker. Not her.”

  “I see.” He paused to straighten out his already impeccable-looking suit.

  “Okay, then, Mr. Mecken. Let’s talk about my fucking money and how you plan on repaying your debt to my organization.”

  BOOM.

  THIRTY-FOUR

  Marcus

  THE LITTLE BLOND WAITRESS was really getting on my fucking nerves. She had a nice set of tits on her, but that voice made me want to do a backflip off the roof of the tallest building in Remington. She ran her mouth about every fucking thing, from her favorite flavor of hummus to her upcoming gynecological exam. Fucking chick was relentless. One look at Maribel’s knowing little smirk on her face as she worked the morning crowd, and I knew she’d sent that little space cadet my way just to fuck with me. The lingering taste of the sweetest pussy I’d ever felt against my tongue was the only thing that kept me from completely losing my shit every time she approached the table. Poor thing didn’t stand a chance, not after what had happened that morning at Fox’s apartment. No fucking way. Having watched Maribel ignite and scream my name when I ate her dripping-wet cunt was just like old times. Only better. She was the only woman I wanted in my bed, beneath me, where I could look into her eyes while I fucked her like the beast I’d become. Eight years of separation, and she was as much mine now as she was when I’d left for the Marines. Soon, little pocket. Soon.

  An urgent text from Range flashed across my cell phone. He needed to see Maribel and me back at the junkyard as fast as possible. I knew my brother; he wouldn’t send up a red flag unless shit was mission critical, so his request wasn’t to be taken lightly. Maribel was gonna be pissed that we had to leave right away, but she’d deal. She had no choice. I stood up from the table and tried to shake off the annoying leech that wouldn’t stop her yammering when I caught sight of Maribel at the counter. She’d serviced her regulars throughout the day with ease, but the new guy waiting to order was different; she was afraid of him. Her demeanor was guarded, and her eyes darted back and forth like she was looking for the nearest escape route.

  My woman was in trouble.

  I reached inside my jacket and grabbed one of my fully loaded nines. I was set to blast that fool if I had to, and fuckin’ with my girl was the quickest way to a world of hurt. I picked up on his body language, the sureness of his stance, and that my-shit-don’t-stink attitude. Fucker stuck out like a priest in a whore house. Fancy-ass shoes, manicured fingernails, a full set of real teeth. Definitely not the sort to hang out in a shitty-ass diner like Nipsy’s. Once the bullshit introductions were over and it was time to get down to business, I allowed my beast to rise to the surface where I needed him to be.

  “You’ll get your fucking money, MacCabe. Until then, get the fuck out.”

  “No need for such hostility, Marcus. Can I call you Marcus? Did you know that Buck Calhoun was an old friend of my father’s? Apparently, those two old war dawgs did some business back in the day. Way before our time, I’m afraid. We were sorry to hear of his passing last year. Death is such a horrible thing. It’s so… final.” He tried to rattle me, put me on edge.

  “Tell me something, MacCabe, did you hear your boy scream like a bitch across town when I put two bullets in his pussy ass? I’m willing to bet you did. Good help is hard to find these days.”

  “The Few. The Proud.” He mocked the Marine slogan. “Now about my money. That’s a hefty nut to come up with all at once. The salary for government employees must have improved some since the last presidential election if you managed to save that much.”

  “Not your concern. Like I said, you’ll get your fucking money.”

  “I don’t doubt that for a minute, Mr. Mecken, not in the least.” MacCabe turned to leave but stopped short unexpectedly.

  “He’s a big step up from that last boyfriend of yours, Ms. Laine. I approve your choice. Please, give my regards to your family.” Fucking prick.

  The thinly-veiled threats hung in the air long after MacCabe left the diner. He’d done his homework, of course; any good criminal would if he had any common sense. The fact that he had come here alone, unarmed, placed him squarely in the cocky-but-not-stupid section. Showing up here wasn’t his big play anyway; MacCabe was too smart to show his hand unless he absolutely had to.
Any one of us could be a target if we weren’t careful, my brothers and their women included.

  They had to be warned.

  “Change your clothes, Maribel. Range needs us at the yard.” She flinched at my harsh command but made no effort to move from where she stood behind the counter. MacCabe’s visit had shaken her to the core. Her brows pinched together as she worried her bottom lip with uncertainty.

  “Check my locker, babe. I’ve got some clean things in there that should fit.”

  The blond waitress gave her a tight smile and sent her toward the back of the diner with a wave of her hand. Once we were alone, she didn’t waste any time sticking up for her friend and setting my ass straight.

  “Hurt her again, and I’ll slice off your cock and eat it with fava beans and a nice bottle of Chianti. Are you picking up what I’m putting down, GI-Joe?” she snapped.

  “Watch your own back, Odie, and I’ll look out for Maribel’s. You feel me?” I shot back.

  “I’m entrusting her to you.” She pointed at my chest. “Don’t make me regret that decision,

  soldier.”

  I had been wrong about the little waitress; she cared about Maribel more than she cared about herself. That was the makings of a true friend, and for that, I would always be in her debt. Still, she talked too fucking much, which was probably the reason why she didn’t have a man. A hard cock down her throat would cure her of that shit; it just wouldn’t be mine. Maribel emerged from the back dressed in jeans and a T-shirt seemingly more in control. My fighter was back. Odie promised to cover for her with the owner, and we set out on the bike toward the junkyard. She held on to my waist a little tighter, breathed a little deeper, and felt a whole lot smaller than she had just hours before. If only we could drive off and leave all the bullshit behind. Until we tackled the past, I wasn’t sure she’d actually run away with me if I asked her to. I wouldn’t bet my dick on it. She’d probably tell me to get fucked, and not in a good way. I’d left behind a girl but came back to a woman, a woman who really didn’t know the man I’d become during my time in the Marines. War changed people, and not for the better.

  Her choice whether or not she could live with that.

  I pulled the bike to a stop at the side of the house. One look at the silver BMW parked in the driveway, and my balls shriveled up in my jeans. I could hear that bitch screaming like a banshee over the rumble of my Rinehart full exhaust like she was standing right next to me. Something told me to pull off and deal with that bullshit another day, but Maribel didn’t wait. She jumped off the back of the bike and ran inside before I had a chance to stop her. Fuck me.

  “Glad to see you two finally decided to show up. You’re goddamn lucky that Clover took Shelly to the doctor and won’t be back for a few more hours, or I would’ve chunked this skank to the curb twenty minutes ago.” Range stood clear across the room with his arms folded across his chest and a deep scowl on his face. A thick, corded vein pulsed in his neck as he tried to reel in his anger enough now that I’d arrived to take charge.

  “Go to hell, Range.” Marci stood from the couch wearing ten-inch heels and a dress that was so short I could see the outline of her pussy lips peeking out from under the hem.

  “I didn’t come here for your shit. I came for that asshole who broke into my father’s office and pointed a gun at his face,” she accused, face tight with indignation.

  Maribel’s breath caught as she stepped closer to where Marci stood and sought her attention.

  “Marcus would never do something like that. You’re just here to cause trouble like always. Why don’t you get the hell out of here and crawl back into that dark, dirty hole where you came from,” she challenged.

  Range stomped out the back door with his ass on his shoulders; he’d obviously seen enough of the sister’s long overdue showdown. I could hardly blame him for bailing when he got the chance. If history proved anything, the bitch was just getting started.

  “My, my, my. Little sis finally grew some claws.” Marci smirked. “What’s it been, Maribel? Five years? I should’ve known you’d go crawling back to that clod after everything you put our parents through. I would ask if you were crazy, but we both know the answer to that question, now don’t we. Isn’t that why you’re working at that bullshit diner serving bums and street people? You’re pathetic.”

  “How did you—?” Maribel sucked in a breath.” Shut your fucking mouth.”

  She turned away from Marci and lowered her head in embarrassment at her chosen profession. Maribel had jack shit to be ashamed of. Marci had never worked a day in her life, unless sucking dick was part of the new McDonalds menu. Normally, the idea of shooting a woman never entered my mind, but for this cow? I was willing to make an exception. Marci had gone out of her way and made things difficult for Maribel for as far back as I could remember. The battle between these two sisters was a long time coming, yet I couldn’t sit back and let Marci run her usual mind games on my girl.

  “Is that the best you’ve got? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Calling her crazy so you’d feel better about not taking your sister’s back all those years? Your bullshit insults are as useless as that old douche bag hanging in your shower. Give it up, cunt,” I seethed.

  “Ohmigod.” Marci clapped her hands and laughed in Maribel’s face. “You haven’t told him, have you? Holy shit! Today really is my lucky day.” Her smile was sinister, as if she had been waiting for that moment her entire life.

  “Please, sissy. I’m begging you, don’t do this. Not now.” The fuck?

  Maribel’s eyes welled with tears as she pleaded with everything she had. I’d never heard her call Marci sissy before today, a term of endearment I was sure she hadn’t seen fit to use in a long-ass time. The heartless bitch who stood in front of her never even batted an eyelash at her sister’s obvious pain. What she failed to realize was that it didn’t fucking matter what she had to say. Whatever dark secret, family rumor, or dirt from the past she was about to spill would never change the way I felt about Maribel. We all had shit hidden in our closets, personal details we avoided sharing. She’d get no judgment from me. I wasn’t one to talk.

  “Why don’t you ask your little girlfriend over there how she had to have her brain fried at our parents’ expense? Or how she was locked away for over a year at one of the top-of-the-line funny farms just so she could function without slitting her wrists. Or how about—”

  “ENOUGH! Get the fuck out, Marci, or I swear to Christ, I’ll end you.”

  I ran up on her so fast she lost her footing and nearly fell on her face. Maribel bolted out the back door and took off running before I could stop her. The smirk on Marci’s face told me she got exactly what she wanted; to cause more pain to a woman who’d already had too much of it.

  “You happy now, cunt? Make you feel good to fuck her up that way? She never did shit to your skank ass, but you just couldn’t leave her alone, could you?” Bitch had the nerve to look offended. The fuck was she playing at?

  “When I was ten years old, I told my father that I wanted to become a successful doctor and work alongside him in adjoining offices.” She swung her air off her shoulders and smiled almost painfully. “And do you know what he said to me, Marcus?” She didn’t wait for me to answer. “He said, ‘Don’t be silly, my beautiful golden princess. Your sister will be the doctor in the family, and YOU will marry a handsome prince. Just stay as pretty as you are, and you’ll make Daddy very happy.’ Can you believe that shit?” she asked with a miserable shake of her head.

  “Yeah, because you were and still are a nasty fucking whore. What else did you expect him to say?” I was being a dick to her, but so what? She’d hurt my woman, and for that, she got zero respect from me. She could go play victim to some other fool. This one wasn’t buying.

  “When Maribel cut us from her life, it felt like Christmas morning in the Laine household. I finally had my father all to myself. No more walking encyclopedia to get in my way. He was mine.”

 
“So, you dry-fucked your only sister in the ass for fuckin’ years because Daddy didn’t hug you enough? You think her life was easy? Working her motherfuckin’ ass off to make something of herself while you ran around spreading your legs for every Tom, Dick, and more dick you could get your hands on?”

  I was about to lose my shit with this bitch if I didn’t get the fuck outa there and find my woman.

  “He was finally mine, Marcus!” she screamed. “He never gave a shit about that. All he worried about was his brain child and why she refused to speak to him. I was the victim of soft bigotry and low expectations, so I did what he wanted me to do and used this face” —she pointed to herself—“to get what I wanted for once. Unconditional love from anyone willing to give it to me.” Marci gathered her purse and jutted her chin in my direction. “I’d say it worked out for the best, wouldn’t you, Marcus?” she finished with a self-deprecating laugh. The bitch had gone cock-crazy from too many years of overuse.

  “Make your peace with God or whatever blood cult you worship, bitch. I see you again…you will not be seeing me. Nod if you’re pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down.”

  It was then I saw the tears in her eyes, and I felt as sorry for her as she did for my woman.

  Too little too fucking late.

  THIRTY-FIVE

  Maribel

  WHERE THE HELL WAS I going?

  There was only one place for me to run to, the only place that made sense. I knew he would find me, my tough guy; all roads led to this one inevitable moment. I took a seat inside the darkened room where the surroundings were so familiar, and I waited. My breathing finally leveled; the only thing that could be heard was the steady thump of my heartbeat as I thought back to the not-so-distant past. How much time had Marcus and I spent in this tiny cabin while we learned what it meant to love one another? The heart was the hardest working muscle in the human body; life ends when it ceases beating. That’s a no-brainer. But what happens to us when the heart is broken beyond repair? You live and breathe with a hole in your chest so big that nothing and no one could ever hope to fill it. You walk around with your head up your ass hoping like hell that one day it would finally all just… stop.