by Ward, Alice
“I will,” Matt promised.
I left Matt to get ready for his date, crawled into my truck, and drove home to my new reality.
***
When I got back to the ranch, the horses were in the pasture and the barn was quiet. Renee’s Honda was parked at the house, so I knew she and Daddy were still basking in their excitement. I’d had my fill of love struck stares for the day, so I left them alone and spent a quiet afternoon outside. I cleaned the horse stalls, saddled Mayhem, and went for a long, leisurely ride in the mountains. Mayhem knew the trail as well as I did, so I relaxed in my saddle and let my mind wander.
Is Matt right? Am I overreacting to Daddy and Renee’s engagement because of my feelings for James? The fact that we’ve slept together does complicate things… but I’m also positive that Daddy and Renee haven’t known each other long enough to take such a big step. Why can’t they just date for a while? Why does everything have to change so fast? Maybe James is right…
Mayhem’s foot slipped on a rock and startled my attention back to the present. I gripped the saddle horn and leaned forward, determined to stay on my horse. Mayhem stumbled for a few exhilarating seconds, went up on his back legs, and then mercifully regained his footing. I gently pulled back on the reins and brought the horse to a stop. I dismounted, moved the flat rock off of the trail, and steadied my nerves.
Maybe that was a sign. I was thinking terrible things about Renee, and I almost got thrown off my horse. Maybe I should do what Matt said and find a way to make peace with all of this.
My stomach grumbled so loud it startled Mayhem. I pulled my phone out of a saddlebag and saw that it was almost five in the afternoon. I swung myself back into the saddle and pointed Mayhem towards home.
I’ll try to give Renee the benefit of the doubt. Surely they’ll have a long engagement. I’ll keep an open mind. But if she does anything that makes me think she’s with Daddy for the wrong reasons, I’ll help James break them up.
Mayhem weaved down the mountain trail and back to flat land. Once we reached the pasture, I gave him a light kick to the flank and let him gallop back to the barn. Renee’s car was still at the house and James’s truck had reappeared in the driveway.
Great… I guess it’s only fitting that our “first official family breakfast” be followed by our “first official family dinner”. I guess I’m just going to have to get used to this… or find somewhere else to live. I wish Matt’s house was bigger… maybe I can talk him into moving.
I dropped down from the saddle and led Mayhem into the stables. I was surprised to find Dallas sitting at the small, battered table.
“Hey, Dallas. What are you doing down here so late?”
“Cole called Mary and me earlier and told us the happy news,” he replied with a gentle smile. “I wanted to make sure you were handling it okay. Cole said you didn’t have the reaction he’d expected, and I was afraid it might be a little bittersweet for you, considering your mom.”
At last! Someone finally understands!
“Are you doing all right?” Dallas asked.
“I’m not sure,” I confessed with a sigh. “I know I should be happy for Daddy… but it’s hard. I keep thinking about how different life would be if Mom had just stayed in the house during that blizzard.”
Dallas took the reins from me and led Mayhem to his stall. “Willow, I think that thought has haunted Cole since the day of the accident,” he told me softly. I followed Dallas through the stables and perched on a stall door while he pulled off Mayhem’s saddle.
“You were too young to remember that day,” Dallas continued. “The storm was so bad I thought the world might be ending. Snow and ice bombarded the mountain, and the sky was lit with constant lightning. The thoroughbred barn was hit…”
“And that spooked Momma’s horse,” I said with a nod. I’d heard the story plenty of times, but listening to Dallas tell it again gave me an odd sense of comfort. It was nice to know that someone still remembered my mom.
Dallas nodded as he brushed out Mayhem’s coat. “Jack of Hearts… he was one of Aces High’s colts. Rose had big plans for that horse. When she found out he’d bolted from the barn, she insisted on going after him herself. Cole tried to talk her out of it. He begged her to let the ranch hands handle it. But Rose was stubborn and headstrong… kind of like another horsewoman I know,” he added with a smile. He returned the horse brush to its peg on the tack wall and we walked back towards the front of the stables.
“Your dad and I went out with Rose,” Dallas continued. “We were dammed fools, all three of us. The snow had let up a bit, lightning was still awful. The weight of the snow and ice had collapsed fences all over the ranch. We picked up the horse’s tracks and realized he’d run for high ground.” Dallas paused and I could see the pain that day still caused him. “And then suddenly, it felt like the entire mountain was moving with the thunder. Rose was a few feet in front of us one minute and… gone in the next.”
Tears filled my eyes as we sat down at the table. I wiped them away and Dallas put a comforting, calloused hand on my forearm.
“Willow, I know this is hard. But I need you to understand what I saw that day. I watched Rose disappear. And then I turned to Cole and watched him do the same. A light went out in him… a light I never thought I’d see again.”
I knew where he was going. “Until he met Renee?” I asked.
Dallas nodded. “She’s brought him back to life, Willow. I know this isn’t easy for you. But Rose would want your dad to be happy. She’d want you both to be happy.”
I shifted in my seat, unsure of how to respond. “I’m trying… or at least I want to want to try… if that makes sense.” It was the truth. I wished that I wanted to get to know Renee better, that I could find a way to want a new family. But to me, family meant me and Daddy at the main house, Dallas and Mary behind us, and grandparents who sent cards for Christmas and my birthday. That kind of family had been just fine for the last twenty-two years and I had no desire to change things.
“Wanting to want to try is a start,” Dallas said with a patient smile. “Keep an open mind about things and remember I’m always here to listen if you need to talk.”
We stood, and I wrapped Dallas in a hug. “Thank you for coming down to check on me, Dallas.”
“Any time, kiddo.”
We released each other and then climbed into our trucks to drive the short distance home.
***
A strong, salty smell greeted me as I stepped into the house. I followed voices into the kitchen, where Renee was bent over the stove stirring a large skillet of thick, white gravy. Daddy and James sat at the table, each nursing a longneck beer.
“Willow, I’m so glad you’re home,” Renee greeted me. She set down her whisk and crossed the room to hug me. I gave her a quick, stiff embrace and pulled away with my nose turned up.
“I’m sorry, but what is that smell?” I asked. “Did someone spread saltlick around the house?”
“Oh, those are the boiled peanuts,” Renee explained as she rushed back to the stove. She resumed her gravy whisking and continued. “They taste better than they smell, I promise. I wanted to do something special tonight, so I’m making a full blown Southern feast.”
“Renee’s really outdoing herself,” Daddy said, beaming with pride at his new fiancé’s kitchen skills. James peeled the label off of his beer bottle in long, thin strips, not even trying to hide the fact that he was bored. I grabbed a beer from the fridge and leaned against the counter as I surveyed the kitchen. It was a mess of flour, grease, and dirty dishes. Two covered skillets sizzled on the back burners while a stock pot boiled next to the gravy. Another pot sat covered next to the stove.
“You have outdone yourself,” I told Renee. “Is there anything I can do to help?” I didn’t actually want to help, but I’d promised Matt and Dallas that I’d be nice.
“Oh no, sweetheart,” Renee insisted. “You just sit down and relax. I’ll have everything ready in just
a few minutes.”
I was grateful for the out and joined Daddy and James at the table.
“How was your ride, pumpkin?” Daddy asked.
“A little more exciting than I’d planned on. There was a big, flat rock in the middle of the trail. That rain last week must have uncovered it. Mayhem slipped a little, but he stayed upright and I stayed on him. We need to call the farrier out though. I’m pretty sure he knocked a shoe loose.”
“There’s no need to call anyone,” Renee called out from her side of the kitchen island. “I can fix it.”
“You can?” I called back, surprised.
Is there anything you can’t do?
“Of course I can. Your father and I were just working on a list of things I’m going to start handling around the ranch. Shoeing the horses is one of them.” Renee brought a large bowl of boiled peanuts and four empty plates to the table. It took a few moments for the full meaning of her words to sink in. My mouth dropped open slightly, and I looked across the table at James. He looked as miserable as I felt.
A list of things she’s taking over around here? That was fast. What the hell else is she suddenly in charge of?
I turned to Daddy with anxious eyes. “I didn’t realize we’d be shuffling responsibilities around so soon. Care to fill me in on the changes?” I swallowed nervously and waited for his reply.
“Relax sweetheart, your barn is still yours. In fact, it’s all yours. I’m signing over my stock in the horses to you next week,” he announced with a broad grin. “Along with the deed to the lot the barn is on.”
“I don’t understand…”
Renee returned to the table with a large platter of chicken fried steaks and Daddy rose to take it from her. “I’ll explain everything in just a second, pumpkin,” he told me. “Just let me help Renee with the rest of the food.”
I took a long sip of my beer and stared at James. “Do you know what’s going on?” I mouthed silently.
He clinched his jaw and nodded. “I don’t think you’re going to like it,” he whispered.
I took a peanut from the bowl so I’d have something to do with my hands. The shell was waterlogged and squishy. I couldn’t bring myself to eat it. I dropped it onto my plate and wiped the saltwater onto a napkin.
Daddy and Renee carried dish after dish to the table. They finally sat down and I took in the food in front of me: chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, pan gravy, fried squash, biscuits, and collard greens fried with bacon.
This is her master plan… she’s going to give him a heart attack.
I served myself just enough food to be polite and waited impatiently for everyone else to fill their plates. Anxiety killed my appetite, but I forced down two bites of potatoes before turning back to Daddy.
“So, you were about to explain something?” I pressed.
Daddy swallowed a large bite of steak and washed it down with his beer. “That’s right. I’m signing over the deed to your barn lot and my stock in the horses. I’m also signing over that lot near the waterfall, the one you want to build on one day.”
My face flushed hot with confusion. “You’re signing over the waterfall lot too? Does that mean… are you kicking me out?”
I couldn’t believe it. I’d dreamed of building my own home on the ranch someday, but I never imagined I’d be kicked out of Daddy’s.
“Well of course we’re not kicking you out,” Renee assured me. “We just didn’t think you’d want to live with us. James certainly doesn’t. Your father and I just want you to have the option of getting out on your own… whenever you’re ready.”
I stared down at my plate and pushed mashed potatoes around with my fork. “I guess that makes sense. But why are you signing over the barn and the horses?” I asked without looking up.
“Because you’ve earned it,” Daddy answered with a shrug. “Also because there will be some changes around here, and I want you to know that the thoroughbreds are yours.”
Here it comes… what’s he given her control over?
Daddy shoveled another bite of food into his mouth and I finished my beer. I set the empty bottle down on the table and James wordlessly rose to get me another.
“What kind of changes?” I finally asked. James returned to his seat and passed me the open bottle. I took a long drink while I waited for Daddy to answer.
“Well, obviously Renee and James will be moving onto the ranch. Renee will live here, of course, and James will be in the free staff cabin,” Daddy began. He took a large bite of mashed potatoes and Renee continued for him.
“I’m going to sell my house,” she explained.
“Our house,” James corrected her.
“Fine, our house,” she agreed, rolling her eyes. “James can’t afford the mortgage and it makes more sense for him to be here anyway.”
“It does?” I asked. I raised one eyebrow and looked at James.
“Yes,” he replied, his jaw clenched again, the muscle working under the skin. “It makes sense, considering my new job.”
I was completely lost. “Your new job…?”
“I want to cut back on my workload, Willow,” Daddy announced. “I want to spend time with my new bride. Dallas has agreed to take on some of my administrative chores, and James is going to step in and help him with the day to day ranch work.”
“You’re looking at the new assistant foreman,” James said dryly.
I was stunned. I looked from Daddy to Renee, and then back to Daddy. “You’re retiring? But you’ve always said you’d never retire.”
“I’m not retiring, just lightening my load. I want to focus on the work I actually enjoy… the work Renee and I can enjoy together.”
“So does this mean you won’t be working in my barn anymore?” I asked Renee.
“I’ll help out when I can,” she assured me. “But with all the traveling we’ll be doing soon, you should probably start thinking about hiring someone new.”
All the traveling we’ll be doing? Of course… now that they’re engaged, Renee will be coming to the Derby with us. Damn it, the whole reason we hired her in the first place was so Matt and I could leave town together.
“Of course,” I replied with my best polite smile. “That’s probably a good idea.”
“I’m so glad you agree,” Renee replied, her voice dripping with excitement. “I’d like for us to both have some free time. I have so many ideas for your program and I can’t wait to share them with you. James was never interested in breeding. It will be so nice to pass my knowledge on to someone.”
Renee took a long drink of her iced tea and I stuffed my mouth full of steak to keep from smarting off.
I knew it! She’s taking over everything. My house, my ranch, my horses… I don’t need her knowledge. This is my only connection to Mom, she can’t have it.
I swallowed the food along with the words that wanted to spew from my mouth. After another sip of beer, my temper calmed but wasn’t yet even. “You have ideas for my program?” I asked. For Daddy’s sake, I did my best to hide the frustration in my voice.
Renee nodded happily as she rose from the table. She walked to the counter top and pulled on oven mitts. “I know you have your eye on that stallion up in Sterling, but I don’t think you should buy him just yet. I’d like to take you to a few farms while we’re in Kentucky. A couple of my old friends are running their parents’ program now. They’re producing some amazing stock. I think that a little Bluegrass blood is just what this place needs.”
And I think we’ve got too much already.
Renee returned to the table with a bubbling peach cobbler. She sat it on a trivet and spooned a huge portion onto Daddy’s plate.
“I appreciate your input, but I made final payment on Locomotion yesterday,” I said as Renee sat back down.
“Well, you can still look at the Kentucky horses,” Daddy broke in. “I’d like to see them too. We’ll make a family trip of it.”
“Oh Cole, that would be wonderful!” Renee gushed.
>
I couldn’t sit there a moment longer. I pushed my chair away from the table. “Renee, the cobbler smells amazing, but I’m too full to try it right now. I left Mayhem saddled. I should really get back to the stables and put him away for the night.”
“Okay sweetheart… I’ll leave some warming in the oven for you,” Renee called out as I escaped from the kitchen. I rushed through the house and out the front door with James at my heels.
CHAPTER 2
“Willow, wait,” James called as I raced down the driveway. I moved towards the stables without acknowledging him. “For heaven’s sake, Willow, they might be watching us. I told them I was coming to help you, could you just wait for me?”
I stopped, but didn’t look back. A few moments later, James was at my side. We continued to the stables without looking at each other.
“How the hell did his happen?” I hissed as we stepped through the open barn door. “How the hell did any of this happen?” I collapsed in a chair and held my head in my hands.
“Mayhem isn’t saddled,” James observed.
I looked up at him impatiently. “Of course he isn’t. I just had to get out of there,” I spat. “No offense to your mother, but if she thinks she’s going to swoop in and start changing things around here, she’s got another thing coming.”
“Well no offense to your dad, but he’s going to learn real soon that marrying my mom doesn’t give him the right to tell me what I can and cannot do,” James snapped.
I looked up, finally meeting his eye. His eyes were narrowed and a thick, green vein pulsed on his forehead. He sat down in the chair across from me and angrily kicked the dirt.
“I take it there’s a story behind your new position?” I asked. “How did they get you to agree to be the assistant foreman?”
“At first, Cole made it sound like I’d be doing him a huge favor. Mind you, this was after my mother announced that she’s selling the only home I’ve ever known. Your dad asked if I’d help out around the ranch since I’ll be living here. I hesitated, because I want to get back to bull riding. I told them that and your dad gave me a big speech about being a man, settling down and accepting some real responsibility. Then Mom made it pretty clear that I’ll be expected to work for my keeping. I need a place to live, and if I want to live here, I have to work here.”