by LS Sygnet
Johnny snorted. “I never thought of that bullshit as freedom.”
“Is that so? When I first came to Darkwater Bay, I had no less than a dozen people warn me that you were an avowed bad boy, a real womanizer who never got beyond a one-night stand.”
“That’s a lie.”
“No, it isn’t. Briscoe, Forsythe, scores of others said the same thing about you. You wanted me to believe it was only a façade you maintained while you were undercover for OSI, but you convinced a hell of a lot of people that it was true.”
He ignored my accusation, even though I didn’t intend it to be one, and refocused on Crevan. “I presume Tony will call when he’s got a time set with Rham Goddard to talk about the prodigal brother.”
“Yeah, though we weren’t sure if you wanted to take the interview or if you wanted us to do it.”
Johnny glanced at me. “I’d be interested in her take on what he has to say. She’s the one who talked to Madden and found out that Kyle Goddard was his nephew.”
“I’d be happy to interview him with you, Johnny.”
He grinned without humor. “I was thinking that maybe you and Briscoe should talk to him.”
I squeezed all the blood out of my knuckles. “If you think that’s best, I’ll be available most of the day. Just let me know when and where Rham Goddard will be available.”
“You’ve got something else on the agenda today?”
“Yes,” I said. “I have a friend who not only wants me around, probably needs me at the hospital too. I think you should know now, so you’re not surprised by this later, but I plan to offer Devlin a place to stay here with me while he recuperates.”
“Which room?” Johnny’s eyes narrowed to the predatory hawk glare.
“The one he has used every time he stays here,” I said. “Second floor master suite.”
“You two are hopeless,” Crevan sighed. “I thought you were coming back here last night to get things settled. Why are you still sniping at each other?”
“Because she expects me to believe that she loves me, but all the while she’s been here, she planned to leave just as soon as Datello was behind bars.”
“Are you nuts? I told you why I’m still here!”
“Right,” he drawled. “You’re not so sure you can live without me. Let me know when you figure it out, Doc.”
My shoulders caved inward. “Crevan, you know how to get in touch with me when Briscoe is ready to talk to Rham Goddard. I’ll be at the hospital.”
“Run off to the other guy you’re not sure you can live without,” Johnny muttered.
I didn’t stick around to hear what else he had to say, but Crevan’s admonishment followed me toward the garage.
“Are you trying to push her into the arms of another man? Jesus, Johnny! What the hell is wrong with you?”
Devlin was sitting up in bed with a tray peppered with a variety of clear liquids for his first breakfast after surgery.
“Would you like to join me for a cup of weak tea and lime Jell-O?”
I grinned. “No thanks, I had my fill of that lovely menu when I pulled my post operative stint here a few months ago. I may never be able to stand the taste of Jell-O again.”
“How goes the case? Did you have any luck with Madden at the concert last night?”
I explained what I learned the previous night. Devlin’s eyes widened.
“Damn. I knew that Madden had family here in Darkwater Bay, but I didn’t know he changed his last name.”
“Apparently he did. He seemed pretty shaken by the news that Kyle, aka Kylie was the murder victim the other night. Underwood insinuated that Madden had some deep dark secret that he’d likely kill to keep buried. I couldn’t help but wonder if that’s what it was.”
“No way,” Dev shook his head. “When Madden told you that he’s open minded enough to live and let live, he wasn’t lying. If there’s any kind of secret, it isn’t a sex scandal, I guarantee. Madden had a pretty colorful drug history before he cleaned up his act. Rumor had it that his side business used to be more lucrative than the music. I suspect that if there was even an ounce of truth to it, that Scott wouldn’t want it known widely.”
“Surely a statute of limitations would prevent him from prosecution at this point,” I said.
“Maybe, then again, who knows for sure?”
“Interesting,” I mused. “So I guess it’s on the agenda today that Briscoe and I talk to the younger Goddard brother. Orion wants his take on this alleged family feud. Madden admits to distance, but says it’s nothing in the grand scheme. He was merely concerned because Theo Goddard never discouraged his son from being quite so out and proud, and Scott felt that it invited undue risk to Kyle’s safety.”
“I’m glad Johnny’s come to his senses, Helen.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” I shrugged at his concern. “Eh, we’re talking at least. It’s a step in a better direction than actively avoiding each other.”
“Are you sure that isn’t what you’d rather do right now?”
“No, Devlin. I love him. We might both be equally confused on a few things, but that is one fact that I can’t escape, and I wouldn’t want to even if I could. I miss my lover, my best friend, the only person that I’ve ever trusted completely.”
“I hope that’s not an indictment on our friendship.”
“Of course not, Dev. But with Johnny…”
His eyes drifted past me. “With Johnny what?”
“I finally realized that he knew me better than I know myself. On one hand, that scared the hell out of me. Now that it’s gone, I miss it like crazy. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so alone in my life.”
Hands came to rest on my shoulders. “You might’ve said that last night, Helen.”
“Johnny…”
He crouched beside my chair and peered up at me. “Is that how you really feel?”
“Yes.”
“Did you tell Devlin that he’s coming home with us to recuperate when he leaves the hospital?”
“I hadn’t gotten around to it yet. Are you sure you’re all right with that, Johnny?”
He lifted one of my hands and pressed the knuckles to his lips. “We’re good now.”
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“Goddard is on his way to OSI. Are you ready to talk to him?”
I swallowed the knot in my throat. “I guess.”
“I’m not gonna force you to do the interview with Tony, Helen. We need this information too much for any interpersonal conflict to block progress. You and I will talk to Goddard.”
“Devlin, when do they plan to let you out of here?”
“If all goes well with Jell-O, I should be ready to leave day after tomorrow,” he said. ”Just in time for the funeral. That is, if I dare show my face.”
“I don’t imagine I’d feel a whole lot different if I were in your shoes, Devlin,” Johnny said. “And I can’t speak for anyone but myself right now. I knew Ned Williams as well as any detective at Downey Division. He wouldn’t want you to feel guilty for surviving. Anybody who wants that doesn’t deserve to call themselves Ned’s friend.”
“Thanks, commander,” Devlin said gruffly. “It means a lot to hear you say that.”
“Helen, we should probably head over to OSI,” Johnny said. “Do you need a minute to say goodbye?”
I shook my head. “I’ll be back later tonight, Dev. Try to get some rest.”
“If you were a real friend, you’d smuggle in a burger and fries when you come back.” He toasted with a spoonful of Jell-O. “Good luck with the case. Remember what Chris and I said about Underpants. He’s by far your most likely culprit in this mess.”
Johnny was quiet until the elevator opened in the basement level of the parking garage. “Chris really hates this Underwood character too, Doc. I trust him. At the same time, I can’t quite shake the feeling that somebody might’ve made all of this land a little too conveniently at Underwood’s feet.”
“I can�
�t disagree with that feeling. For as bright as Underwood claims to be, I get the sense that he’s truly clueless when it comes to realizing how bad all of this is starting to look for him. Beyond what Chris and Devlin have told us about his history, is there any other motive he might’ve had to murder Madden’s nephew?”
“Beyond the obvious, that he hates homosexuals? I can’t think of a one.”
“Plenty of reasons that people might want to see Underwood arrested for murder though,” I said. “This case shouldn’t be so confusing.”
“That seems to be this week’s recurrent theme. Our case is a confusing mess, along with my memory, our relationship, your feelings about friendship versus how they gel with your feelings for me.”
“Johnny –”
“I’m not chastising you, Doc. I get it now. The majority of this is my insecurity, because I can’t remember jack shit that would help me trust what I feel. Then again, you’re pretty adept at sending mixed signals. You want me living under your roof so maybe I’ll remember. Meanwhile, you want your friend recuperating there and clearly, he’d leap from the mountaintops if you gave him the slightest indication that you were interested in more than friendship. I feel like every time I turn around, some dude is leering at you.”
“That’s not true.”
“Don’t tell me how I feel.” Johnny pinned me against the side of my Expedition. “Just because you’re clueless doesn’t mean I’m blind.”
“Well I am blind. Or at least have tunnel vision.”
“Oh yeah?”
I nodded. “All I can see is you.”
“That was true,” he eyed me critically. “My gut hasn’t let me down with you, has it?”
“Not so far.”
“I guess that was the part I was struggling with the most. Well, that and one other thing.”
“What?”
Johnny shook his head. “I’m not sure I should tell you. Given your anger toward Tony right now, I suspect that I already know how you’ll react.”
My heart hardened to a stone lump in my chest. “What did he tell you?”
“He thought you would literally kill Mitch Southerby for what he did to me. He believed it, Doc. It scared the hell out of him.”
“And?”
He pinned me to the car with a steady gaze. “I get the distinct impression it wouldn’t have been the first time you killed somebody that hurt you that much.”
My heart pounded out a verbal rhythm. Don’t panic. Stay calm. Don’t panic. Stay calm.
“Doc?”
“I did want to kill him for what he did to you. I think that’s a pretty human response when someone hurts the person we love most in the world. Do I need to remind you that you did kill Fredrick Jackson after he shot me?”
“I see your point,” but it was clear that Johnny was unconvinced that my reaction was normal and borne of frustration and fear. “Still, according to the police report, there was a very real danger of Jackson finishing the job, whereas when you threatened to kill Southerby, he was safely in custody.”
“Right,” I gritted my teeth. “In custody in the same place he previously escaped by faking his own death once before. Sue me. I had a momentary lapse of reason.”
He nuzzled my neck. “I’m not saying I disagree per se. You just freaked Tony out.”
“Yeah, so much that he was hoping you’d never want to see me again.”
“Nah,” Johnny inhaled deeply. “He just didn’t want me to wake up to learn that my girl was facing murder charges.” His voice dipped to a low whisper. “He doesn’t know that you’re really smart enough to get away with it, does he?”
“You’ve been an investigator long enough to know that nobody is really smart enough to get away with murder, Johnny.” Fear clenched my heart in a vice. Was Johnny starting to remember, and if so, did his suspicion of me reflect that he never believed what I told him about Rick’s death? Or was all this doubt the fruit of seeds planted by Tony Briscoe?
Chapter 17
Rham Goddard was not what I expected. His brother, Scott Madden, was a wild, ginger-haired rock star replete with tattoos everywhere the naked eye could see. He had holes pierced in his ears, through an eyebrow and God only knew where else that was hidden by his clothing. The baby brother on the other hand had russet highlights that reminded me of Crevan’s hair, or mine for that matter. The style was conservative short, and he seemed to have an appreciation for a wardrobe that went beyond ripped denim, faded t-shirts and high-top sneakers.
He rose and extended one hand when Johnny and I entered the conference room adjacent to Johnny’s office at OSI’s headquarters. “Detectives, what has Scott done this time.”
No preamble, just jump straight to the assumption of his summons. Johnny pulled out a chair for me and waited until I was settled before sitting beside me.
“Mr. Goddard, thank you for coming out here on such short notice. We did want to talk to you about your brother, however, Scott Madden isn’t the brother we want to discuss right now.”
His forehead wrinkled. “Theo?”
“I understand that your brother and his wife take an annual sabbatical on their boat every year,” I said.
“Sure,” Goddard said. “Oh my God. Did something happen to them?”
“No, sir,” Johnny reassured him quickly. “They’re expected back tomorrow, a little ahead of schedule, but safe and sound.”
“We hope,” I murmured. “I guess I should be candid, Mr. Goddard. We have questions about Scott and Theo’s relationship, an estrangement that Scott says has existed for some time, and the source of the problem.”
Concern bled into confusion. “Why on earth…? All right, though I can’t imagine why the police would care about any of this. Scott and Theo were barely ten months apart in age, detective, so I guess it’s somewhat natural that there would be a rivalry between them. Theo is the opposite of what Scott has always been. Theo excelled in school. Scott made a point of being a horrible student – not that he isn’t every bit as intelligent as Theo, it was simply one of many ways he defined himself as someone distinctly separate from a brother who was often mistaken for a twin.”
“And Theo resents that Scott wants to be unique?” I asked.
“No, no. He pretty much rolled his eyes at Scott’s antics and accepted it for what it was. Even when Scott was up to his eyeballs in substance abuse, Theo could always be counted upon for support, moral or otherwise.”
“What other kind of support would Scott need beyond moral?” Johnny injected another salient question.
“Financial of course. Nobody burns through money faster than our brother. Rehab isn’t cheap, and until a few years ago, Scott was pretty much in a cycle of spending as much time in rehab as he was on his career.”
“Was it when he became religious that the rift widened?”
“Well, to be honest, Theo and I were less than thrilled when Scott announced that he was a bona fide Buddhist, but the change in his personality was undeniable. He seemed calmer, more centered, he was certainly more thoughtful and capable of admitting that he made mistakes. Part of my brother’s lifestyle I think is that no one has ever called him to task when he’s out of line, let alone flat out wrong. He became spoiled when no one dared stand up to him, and suddenly, there was a nuclear meltdown whenever anybody danced close to that line with him.”
“But Buddhism changed his outlook that dramatically.” I didn’t ask, because Goddard had verbosely explained one simple fact.
“He did a complete one-eighty with us,” Rham said. “Home for holidays, even though in his new religion, there are no Christian holidays. Suddenly, our in-your-face brother was respectful of our differing beliefs. He showed an interest in our lives, our well-being. It was hard to suspect that the changes weren’t genuine.”
“But Theo had his doubts.”
“No, Detective Eriksson. If anybody had doubts, it was me. You’ve got to remember. I’m significantly younger than Theo and Scott. I’ve watched this
dance they do for my entire life. I kept waiting for the punch line, for it to blow up and coat everybody with blood and guts.”
“Did it happen eventually?” Johnny asked.
“Not the way you’d imagine, Commander Orion. About five years ago, Scott was home for a visit, and told Theo that he was concerned about our nephew Kyle. Kyle is one of those kids who makes a very compelling case for the biological influence in homosexuality. I swear, the kid was really born a flamboyant, out of the closet, fearless guy who only had eyes for other boys.”
“Theo disapproved?” I knew that Scott’s version of the story was opposite what I suggested.
“No, but Scott told Theo that for Kyle’s safety, he ought to curb some of his more outrageous behavior. He said he saw unspeakably cruel behavior directed at kids like Kyle as he traveled the world, and I quote, kicked some serious ass in defense of people like Kyle, but that he was apt to incite violence if somebody didn’t rein him in.”
“I see,” truly I did. Madden had been forthright with me about one thing at least.
“Well, Theo flipped over it. He called Scott a hypocrite for living his outlandish, often dangerous and always illegal lifestyle for so many years, and then claiming enlightenment and encouraging Kyle to live a lie. Theo really ranted and raved, but Scott held his ground. He told Theo there was a difference between honest living and tweaking the noses of everyone Kyle encountered – and really, who better to know the difference than Scott? He elevated nose tweaking to a high art form. In one sense, I understand that Scott wanted to spare Kyle some of the pain he’s endured from learning everything the hard way. On the other hand, I see Theo’s point. We pat our sons on the back for being stereotypical jocks. If Kyle wanted to be the prom queen instead of prom king, Theo was going to be supportive.”
“Your brother is a clinical psychologist, yes?” I asked.
He nodded. “They both had points that were valid, but as with just about every other major issue between Theo and Scott, the solution lay somewhere in the middle. Kyle could stand to tone down his behavior, but he shouldn’t hide who he is either. Sounds confusing, doesn’t it?”