Falling Fast

by Reynolds, Aurora Rose

  “She should be with me,” I whisper.

  “I have a nursing home I work closely with. They are one of the best in the state. Family is always welcome all hours of the day and night. You can spend as much time with her as you like. The nursing staff at that location is great, and your grandmother would have round-the-clock care, someone checking on her every hour, making sure she’s safe,” he explains, and my eyes close. I failed her, completely failed her. “I know it’s never an easy decision, but it’s the best one you can make for her and you right now.”

  “Can we check it out before we agree?” Colton asks, and my eyes open to look at him.

  “Of course,” the doctor agrees. “I would suggest you do that anyway. I know nursing homes have a bad stigma, but I promise that after you meet some of the staff and see the location, you’ll feel differently about it.”

  “We’ll go today,” Colton states, squeezing my hand.

  “Good. Now do you have any more questions?” he asks, handing me over a brochure before standing.

  “Not right now,” I tell him, and his face softens.

  “It will be okay, and Gia, I can tell that you think you failed her, but you didn’t. You saved her life. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been to pull her from that house, but you did it,” he says, and tears fill my eyes. “Check out the location then get back to me. I plan on moving your grandmother to a new room and keeping her here for a few days so we can keep an eye on her to make sure she’s okay after the fall she took.”

  “Okay,” I murmur, because there is nothing else I can do.

  “We’ll talk soon. My card is attached to the back of that pamphlet. Call me if you have any questions.”

  “I will,” I reply as he walks over to the door, opening it for us to leave.

  Going back to everyone, Rose tells us that Kirk left to open the bar so I tell Nina and Rose what the doctor said then listen to them tell me that they have to agree with him about his suggestion. Even though I hate it, I still understand why it needs to be done. It’s no longer safe for her to be home, even with someone there with her. I can’t watch her every second of the day, and just like a little kid, she needs round-the-clock supervision from people who understand her disease.

  “I’m going to take Gia over there to check the place out,” Colton tells them. “That way she can see for herself whether or not she thinks it’s a fit.”

  “That’s a good idea,” Rose agrees.

  “After Grandma wakes up, we’ll go,” I say, taking a seat in the chair I vacated earlier. “I won’t feel okay about leaving her until I see her open her eyes.”

  “That’s understandable, honey,” Rose agrees softly then she looks at her son and I feel my spine stiffen when she asks Colton, “Did you ever get around to cleaning out your spare room?”

  “Yeah,” he answers, taking a seat next to me.

  “Can Gia stay there while she gets things sorted out?”

  “Absolutely.”

  Uh… what?

  “That’s not necessary. I’m sure I can find a hotel or something.”

  “You’re not staying in a hotel.” Nina waves that comment away like it’s a fool’s idea. “I would offer you our spare room, but we don’t have one since Ned and I sleep in separate rooms.”

  That’s interesting to know.

  “And I would offer you one of ours, but the boys and the grandkids come up all the time, so there isn’t really space. Colton’s place is nice, and his spare room has it’s own bathroom, so you’ll have some privacy,” Rose says, and I wonder if her and Nina talked about this while we were gone.

  “I don—”

  “Genevria,” Nina whispers, cutting me off before I can give them a list of reasons why this is the worst idea in the history of the world.

  Spinning my head around, I see Grandma’s eyes opening up and I stand. Leaning over her, I rest my hand against her cheek. “Grandma,” I say, and she blinks up at me with confusion in her eyes then tries to sit up. Resting my hand against her stomach, I keep her in place. “It’s okay. You’re safe. Don’t move.”

  “I’m going to go let the nurse know she’s awake,” Nina tells us.

  I don’t lift my head to look at her; I just keep my eyes on Grandma, trying to keep her calm. “What…” she starts, but doesn’t continue. She blinks again.

  “It’s okay. You fell and hit your head. We’re in the hospital, but you’re okay,” I tell her gently, but she doesn’t react. She just stares up at me, which make the worry I’m already feeling, escalate.

  “Let me have a look at her, honey,” I hear an unfamiliar voice say, and I look up, seeing a nurse on the other side of the bed. Standing back, I feel Colton get close as I watch the nurse talk to Grandma, who doesn’t answer. She still seems lost and confused. The nurse helps her sit up then checks all her vitals again. “She’s okay. I’m going to let the doctor know that she’s awake.” The nurse tells me, “I’ll also bring some water for her to sip on my way back.”

  “Thanks.” I get close to Grandma once more. “Grandma?” I call, and her eyes come to me, but it’s like looking at a photograph. There’s nothing there. “I love you,” I whisper, and she blinks. “It will be okay,” I lie to her and myself, because if I don’t, I know I will break down.

  ~**~

  “It’s a nice place,” Colton says, and I pull my eyes off the window to look at his profile. He’s right; the Morning Point Nursing Home is a nice facility, beautiful actually. The huge cream-colored brick building sat at the base of the mountain surrounded by trees with a view of the lake out front. The interior wasn’t sad and depressing either. It looked like a home with a sitting area that had a large TV over a fireplace, big, oversized couches for people to lounge on, and two long tables behind that, where people were gathered doing an arts and crafts project, something the director told me happens twice a week.

  The rooms were also nice, soft yellow walls with hanging art, and big open windows with views of either the lake or the forest behind. There was also a covered outdoor area for the residents to use whenever they liked. But even with all of that, it still wasn’t home. I just had to keep reminding myself that we no longer had a home to go to.

  “She’ll be safe there.”

  She would be safe there with constant care and security. All the windows had locks on them, and the doors had coded locks, making it impossible to leave without someone with a badge letting you out.

  “It is nice, and it’s safe,” I agree, running a hand through my tangled hair.

  “When we get to the house, you can shower. I’ll call Tide and have him help me get your Jeep,” he says, reminding me of the fact I will be staying with him—something I have been trying to forget about all day.

  “I don’t have the key for my Jeep.”

  “Don’t worry about that,” he says, and I frown but ignore his statement.

  “What time did they say I could go back to the hospital tomorrow?” I ask as he pulls up to a stop sign.

  “Visiting hours start at ten and end at eight.”

  I wanted to stay with Grandma tonight, but Rose and Nina both refused to let me. They told me that I needed to get a shower, something to eat, and some rest before I went back, because I looked like I was about to—in their words—fall over. Even the nurses were on board with kicking me out, which is an ode to exactly how horrible I must look.

  “Do you want me to stop and pick you up something to eat?”

  “I’m not hungry,” I reply, leaning my head back and closing my tired eyes.

  “Gia, you need to eat something. You haven’t eaten all day.”

  “I had crackers,” I remind him, opening my eyes back up and turning my head toward him.

  “You had crackers that Nina had in the bottom of her bag for God knows how long. That does not count as a meal,” he grumbles, turning then turning again before pulling into the parking lot for Panera Bread. Moving into the drive-thru line, he looks at me. “Now, what do you wan
t to eat?”

  “You’re annoying.”

  “I’m not sure that’s on the menu, but I guess I could ask,” he retorts, and I let out an aggravated huff then look at the menu board, because I want to get this over with.

  “I’ll have a cup of broccoli cheddar soup and half of an avocado BLT sandwich, and I don’t have money, so you should probably ask them if they need someone to wash dishes,” I snap the end part, and he smiles. He fricking smiles at me, like he thinks I’m funny.

  Gaaah!

  Pulling up to the window, he orders me a bowl, not a cup, of soup, and a whole, not a half, of a sandwich. Then he pulls up to the window and pays, handing me the bag to put at my feet after they give it to him.

  “Thank you,” I tell him, only because it would be rude to open the bowl of soup and pour it on his head.

  “You’re welcome,” he laughs.

  “Whatever.” I point my eyes out the window and keep them there the rest of the drive, only to have my breath catch when we pull up to his house. No, not house, a cabin in the middle of the woods with the lake so close you can actually walk there in just a few steps.

  “This is it,” he tells me, parking and opening his door. Getting out with him, I grab the bag of food then head toward the front of the cabin, trying to take it all in. It’s not a huge structure, but it doesn’t need to be. The covered porch on the front with two rocking chairs side-by-side looking out over the lake is enough of a reason to want to live here.

  Stopping when he pulls a key out of his pocket to open the door, I look behind me when I hear a loud woof then freeze as a big black dog with a long furry coat bounds toward us at a full run.

  “Loki, heel,” Colton orders, but the dog doesn’t heel. He keeps coming until he’s up the steps. Taking a step back, I bump into Colton then let out the breath I was holding when the dog sits on his bottom a few feet away and his tongue lolls out the side of his mouth as he looks between Colton and me. “Gia, this is Loki,” Colton introduces, and I study the dog, which is bigger than any I have ever seen before. “He’s friendly.” He takes the bag from me while ordering, “Hold out your hand to him.”

  Looking from him to the dog, I reluctantly stick out my hand, and Loki scoots forward on his bottom, pressing his nose to my palm before licking it. Laughing when he licks it again, I run my hand over his fur-covered head and scratch behind his ears. “Good boy,” I whisper, and he scoots closer then gets up on all fours, shoving his head into my stomach.

  “I’d say he likes you,” Colton observes, and I grin up at him.

  “I didn’t know you had a dog,” I say to his back as he heads inside, so I follow him with Loki still pressing his face into my stomach to get some more attention.

  “I might give him somewhere to rest his head, feed, and water him, but Loki’s his own dog. He does his own thing most to the time,” he tells me as I shut the door and take in the space.

  I was right; it’s not huge, but it’s nice. The walls are all golden wood with a wooden staircase going up to the second floor that looks like a loft type area, a fireplace in the corner of the room with a TV above it, and stone going all the way up to the roof of the vaulted ceiling with lots of windows. The living room is open with a leather couch and a long island, also wooden, where two barstools sit side-by-side, separating the space from the kitchen. The kitchen isn’t big, but it’s big enough that two people could cook and not step all over each other’s toes. It’s nice, cozy even, and I can tell it’s a man’s place, since the décor is rustic and sparse with no photographs except for one of a hunting dog and a gun.

  “This is beautiful,” I tell Colton, turning around to face him once I’ve taken it all in.

  “I like it. It was actually my grandparents’ place. They left it to me and my brothers when they passed, and since neither of my brothers wanted it, I was able to buy it from them,” he says, coming around the island of the kitchen. “My room’s up in the loft, but there’s a bedroom down here.” He motions for me to follow him, so I do, walking around the side of the stairs, through a door, and into a small room with a window over the wooden twin bed that’s pushed up against the wall. There’s one side table and a dresser, with another door open where I can see a small bathroom including a pedestal sink, toilet, and standing shower. “It’s not much.”

  “It’s perfect.” And it is perfect, especially since my other option is sleeping in my car. “Thank you for this.”

  “It’s not a big deal.” He runs his hand through his hair then looks down at me. “Do you want me to get you something that you can change into after you shower?”

  “Are you trying to tell me nicely that I look like crap and stink?” I smile, but he doesn’t return it. His eyes get soft and his finger comes up to graze my cheek.

  “You don’t look like crap, Gia. I don’t think you could ever look like crap,” he tells me, holding my gaze, and my stomach drops in a good way.

  “If you have something, that would be good,” I say, needing him to stop looking at me like that.

  Clearing his throat, he looks away, running his hand through his hair again. “I’ll be back.”

  “Okay,” I respond, watching him turn to leave.

  Looking down at Loki, I rub the top of his head then jump when Colton pops out of nowhere carrying a stack of clothes, which he hands to me, saying, “Go on and shower. Cade’s wife, Janet, left some stuff in there the last time she was here, so feel free to use it. We can pick you up anything else you need tomorrow after you see your grandma.”

  “Thanks again.” I hold up the clothes that even inches from my nose smell like him.

  His eyes scan my face, and they do it for a long time before he turns and leaves, muttering, “I’ll be back. Shower and eat, Gia.”

  Bossy.

  “See you later,” I say to his back, and he turns to look at me over his shoulder before he lifts his chin and disappears.

  Figuring I should shower first, I head for the bathroom but pause to look down at my shadow. “Sorry, boy, you can’t come with me,” I tell Loki, who lets out a huff before dropping to his belly on the floor. Closing the door behind me, I get undressed and turn on the shower. As I look into the mirror, I see I was right. I’m a mess. My long, dark hair is a matted rat’s nest, and my green eyes look tired, the bags under them making them look worse.

  Letting out a defeated sigh, I get into the shower and let the hot water wash away the stench of smoke still clinging to me, then grab the shampoo. I use it twice then do the same with conditioner before using the body wash to scrub myself from head to toe. By the time I’m done, I barely have energy to get dressed, but I still do, and even though I don’t really feel like eating, I know I should, so I head for the kitchen with Loki right behind me.

  I get up on one of the barstools, pulling out my food and the plastic silverware they gave me, and take a bite of my sandwich before looking down at Loki, whose eyes are glued to my hand. “Here you go, boy,” I murmur, giving him the other half of my sandwich. He takes it, not even bothering to really chew. He just kinda swallows the whole thing before going over to his dog bed next to the fireplace, groaning in happiness as he lies down. Opening my soup, I take a few bites of it before putting the lid back on. I’m stuffed, and now I’m completely out of energy to do anything more than clean up my mess and plant myself on the couch, which I do.

  “Gia.”

  Hearing my name, I blink my eyes open, not remembering falling asleep. I wipe my mouth, because I’m sure I was drooling, and sit up. I look at Colton then look at the bags he has with him, familiar bags—bags that were under the bed in my room at Grandma’s. “You got my stuff. How?”

  “Tide and I went in through the window on the back side of the house,” he explains, taking a seat next to me on the couch and sitting forward to pet Loki when he wanders over. “Your Jeep’s out front. I found your purse and key in your room. I also got everything from your dresser and some stuff from the bathroom in the hall. I didn’t se
arch the rest of the house for more of your stuff, but I figured we could get all of it when the fire chief gives you access to the house.”

  “You broke into my grandma’s house to get my stuff?” I look at my bags, thinking that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.

  “Don’t cry, Dimples,” he whispers, while tears fill my eyes, making it hard to see.

  “I’m not,” I lie, as a sob climbs up the back of my throat that I can’t control, and before I can tell him I’m okay, he has me in his arms with my face tucked into his neck.

  “Let it out. I’ve got you,” he says gently, and all of the stress, worry, and sadness I have been feeling and holding on to for the past few weeks boils over. I cry harder than I have cried in a long time, so hard that it’s impossible to catch my breath, so hard that I don’t know if I will be able to stop. So hard, I end up crying myself to sleep in his arms.

  Waking up the next morning in my room, I lie in bed forever looking at the trees out the window, trying to build up the courage to go out and face Colton. I can’t believe he had to carry me to bed after I cried all over him last night. Even if he didn’t tell me to stop, I know no man wants a woman they hardly know crying their heart out in their lap. Knowing I’m going to have to face him sooner or later, I throw back the covers and get out of bed, wishing I had a pair of thick socks to wear since the wood floors are freezing cold.

  I go over to the bathroom, take care of business, and rinse out my mouth with water, since I need to dig through my stuff that’s probably still in the living room, to find my toothbrush or toothpaste. Once I’m done, I go to the door and open it an inch, just enough that I can peek out. I can’t see much from where I’m standing, but I can see that Colton isn’t in the kitchen. Opening the door the rest of the way, I step out, almost falling on my face when I trip over Loki, who is lying in front of my door.

  “Are you trying to kill me?” I ask him, giving him a rubdown when he stands on all fours and his tail starts to whip back and forth. “Come on,” I call, heading through the living room to the kitchen. The whole house is quiet, but it smells like coffee, so Colton had to have woken up at some point and at least made a pot this morning. After finding the coffee cups, I pour myself a mug, adding creamer and sugar that are sitting on the counter, before heading for the door. As soon as I open it, Loki runs past me to Colton who is sitting in one of the rocking chairs, wearing a pair of sweats and a dark blue thermal with his shoe-covered feet up on the rail. His hair is damp, like he just had a shower.