Even If You Don't

by Kimberly Blake

Char doesn’t seem to agree with my statement either. “Not as hot as Eric, but definitely very cute.”

  After her pep talk, we head back to the deck. We take our seats and Griff has joined the table now.

  “What’d you have to go get?” He asks.

  We didn’t think the lie through so I look to Char and she’s no help.

  “Tampons,” I announce. It was the first thing that popped in my mind. I want to facepalm myself. Eric starts grunting like he’s uncomfortable. Griff puts his fingers in his ears and starts saying “Lalalalalala” and Parker just laughs. Guys are so weird.

  I’m eager to change the subject so I start talking about the trip coming up. My brother takes a seat and joins the conversation. Everyone is really excited because it’s basically a free vacation. We’re also happy for Dan because he’s really happy about getting married. That’s when Lauren shows up and the excitement from everybody is a bit more muted. Lauren walks over to my brother, who is sitting on the other side of Char, and makes him go into the house with her to have a little “chat.” Eric makes a comment on how “chat” is a code-word for “bone.” I don’t quite agree with his assessment as Lauren looks pretty irritated.

  Griff gets up to tend to the grill. Eric goes back to his phone, as usual. Char looks upset. Should I push now? No, I should wait until we’re alone. Then there is Parker who is trying his damndest not to look at my boobs. It’s pretty comical and I almost laugh out loud. It’s secretly thrilling that someone is noticing me over Charlotte and I’m all about it.

  “So Parker, you said you were a football coach?”

  “Yeah, I’ve been an assistant coach for a team about an hour away for the past five years and when this position opened up, I jumped at it because the school is in a better division.” I immediately start doing the math in my head. If he started coaching right out of college and he finished at 22 then he’d be 27 which is my age. Match made in heaven. He’s still talking about the differences in the lower and high-level schools so I tune back into the conversation so I don’t miss anything like last time. He might ask me out. Maybe we can role play and I’ll be a naughty cheerleader. That would be fun. I can probably still do the splits, but I’ll have to practice first. I don’t want to hurt myself before the main event. I see him looking at me, my eyes this time, and it looks like he’s waiting for me to respond. I don’t want to just blurt out “yes,” because what if he asked if I have a boyfriend or if I’m a convict or if I have a third nipple? Let the record show that the answer is no to all of those. No nubbins here.

  So I say, “What’s that now?”

  Char rolls her eyes because she knows I’m in my head again. That’s where I spend the majority of my time.

  Parker just smiles and repeats his question, “What is your job?”

  “Ohh, I’m a marketing coordinator for IT Solutions. It’s a firm downtown. I work three days in the office and two from home. A lot of people work remotely because it’s an IT firm and this way we can occupy less space by sharing offices and cubes with employees that work on the other days. It’s really just riveting stuff.”

  “Sounds like it,” he chuckles. I like his chuckle. It’s cute, like him. I kind of want to eat him up. Maybe that’s just because I’m hungry.

  “Hey Griff, are those burgers done? My stomach is about to eat itself,” I yell to Griff by the grill. He gives me a thumbs up above his head without turning around and starts loading them onto a plate. Parker looks amused by my outburst. I excuse myself from the table to go inside and grab the condiments from the fridge. I slide open the glass door and step into the house. I hear Lauren going off on Dan. I try not to listen because, as you already know, I like to stay out of things that aren’t my business, but I can’t help but overhear Charlotte’s name and my ears perk up.

  I hear Dan say, “Charlie’s not even going to be there!” Dan’s the only one that calls her Charlie. Just like Char is the only one that calls him Danny. I have a distinct feeling that Lauren doesn’t like that either as she emphasizes her name when she speaks next.

  Lauren yells, “But Charlotte is here now, isn’t she?”

  Dan sounds frustrated, “She came with my sister. What am I supposed to do? I’m not going to ask her to leave because then Macy would have to leave too.”

  “Well, maybe they should both leave. I mean, my goodness Daniel, can’t Macy get her own friends? Why does she have to follow you around like a puppy dog?”

  My appetite has immediately vanished. I remind myself that this is a very good reason not to bother with other people’s issues. They might just become your own.

  I grab the stuff from the fridge quickly and load up my arms with mustard, ketchup, pickles, cheese, and lettuce and start to slide out the door. As soon as I’m on the deck I almost collide with Char, who is heading inside, so I tell her I need her help and transfer some of the stuff to her. We put everything on the table and she turns around to head inside again and I grab her arm. I really don’t want her to walk into that conversation. Whatever that was.

  “Hey Char, I’m not feeling so hot. Do you think we can head out?” She gives me a strange look but says okay. I tell her that we should just head out the side gate rather than going inside so we won’t disturb Lauren and Dan. I insinuate that I agree with Eric’s earlier assessment that they were going in there to bone and Char looks like she’s about to puke. She readily agrees and we say our goodbyes. I’m pretty bummed to cut short my flirtation with Parker. I should have gotten his number, I think to myself as I climb into my car. Once we pull out on the street Char asks me what’s going on.

  “I’m feeling kind of nauseous. I think I need to just go home and lie down. What’s up with you?” Now is the time to push I’ve decided. Because something is going on with her. She’s fiddling with the hem of her shorts while she bites her lip.

  She looks up at me and she just looks so damn sad. Her eyes are brimming with unshed tears as she explains what has been bothering her. “Ever since your brother and Lauren got engaged, he’s been so distant. We use to go to dinner every single Thursday night at Freddy’s Taco Shop. I swear we’ve never missed a single Thursday since we started the tradition unless one of us was out of town, and he didn’t show up last week. He didn’t even have a good excuse. He said it slipped his mind. We’ve been doing that for years! How does it just slip his mind?”

  I’m starting to get a better idea about what’s bothering her. She’s missing her other best friend. He’s disappearing, and Lauren is the reason.

  “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry. I don’t think he’s doing it on purpose.” Except, I think I just lied to her because if the conversation I overheard earlier is any indication, we’re not quite welcome, according to Lauren. So he’s probably avoiding Char to make Lauren happy. Which makes sense because, you know, he’s marrying her but it sucks for us. I suggest we go back to my place and drink some wine and watch terrible romantic comedies and she agrees.

  I’m pulling out a couple bottles of wine to get us started. I’m running low so I make a mental note to grab some next time I’m at the store. I mean, I only have like 5 bottles left. The rack is practically empty.

  Char says, “Hey, I thought you weren’t feeling well earlier?”

  “You know, I think it was a false alarm. It was probably all those butterflies I was feeling after meeting Parker and I mistook it for nausea.” She looks at me skeptically but drops it.

  That’s when my phone pings. I have a couple of messages that I’ve missed and didn’t realize it.

  Dan: Where did you go?

  Dan: Why didn’t you say goodbye?

  Dan: The guys said you were feeling sick.

  Dan: Let me know if you need anything.

  Gosh, what a mother hen. I shoot him a text thanking him for his concern and letting him know I’ll be okay. Then in pops another message, this time from an unknown number.

  Unknown number: Hey, how are you feeling?

  Me: Who is this?

  U
nknown number: Parker Hastings

  This is where I start doing a happy dance. I literally start dancing in my kitchen and Char is staring at me like I’m crazy.

  I decide to go old school AOL on him.

  Me: A/S/L

  For those of you who don’t know, that means age, sex, location.

  Parker: 27/Male/Your brother’s backyard

  I’m impressed that he didn’t put “yes please” instead of male for the sex question. Because even though he’s an adult, I find that many men still have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old boy. I’m about 99% positive his brother would have answered that way.

  Me: How did you get my number? I don’t recall you asking for it.

  Parker: That’s because you left before I got the chance.

  Me: Oh… well, that still doesn’t answer my question.

  Parker: I swiped Eric’s phone and stole if from his contacts.

  Me: I don’t believe you. Eric is never without his phone. I think it has become one with his hand.

  Parker: Lol, he left it on the table when he did a cannonball in the pool.

  Me: Now that I believe. He would never endanger his phone by taking it near water and he does like his cannonballs.

  Parker: You never answered my question. How are you feeling?

  Me: Much better, thanks for asking.

  Parker: That’s good to hear.

  I think about responding but I don’t want him questioning anything else so I place my phone on the counter and join Char on the couch. I tell her about Parker texting me and she perks up a bit from her earlier slump. She’s happy for me and so am I. Someone is interested in me! Maybe I’m not a potato.

  We settle on the couch and watch our chick flicks. I end up staying up past Char and debating about texting Parker back. I decide it’s too late to text a normal person unless it’s a booty call and I’m definitely not going to booty call someone I just met, even if he is hot. I’m just not that kind of girl. I’m a lady, I’ll have you know. Hahahaha, sorry even I can’t quite make it through that without a laugh. I don’t text him, though. I head to bed and fall blissfully asleep.

  Chapter 2

  I’m awoken the next day by an angry angel. I realize the angel is Char and she’s angry because apparently, I’m diagonal in the bed. “How can such a small person take up so much of the bed?!”

  I throw my pillow at her and then I realize I now don’t have a pillow. I make poor life choices. I decide to get up and make breakfast because, you know, food is vital to living organisms. I’m just starting on the eggs when Char walks out of my room dressed and ready for the day. She’s stolen one of my tops and is wearing her shorts from the day before.

  I make two plates and set them at the bar so we can eat. She says she need to go back to her place after breakfast because she’s working this afternoon and wants to get a nap in since she didn’t sleep so great. She says this while giving me a pointed look so I know she’s referring to me taking up most of the bed. I feel a little guilty about that but not a lot guilty because I was kind enough to let her stay, and I just made her breakfast.

  After I drop her off at her house, I go through the Starbucks drive-through for a latte. After my pick-me-up, I’m ready for the day. I go home and start getting dressed for the late service at church.

  After church, I head to my mom’s house for a late lunch. She always cooks a big meal on Sunday, so that’s always where I end up because… food. My step-dad is in the living room with his kids, grandkids, and Dan, making dad jokes. I always find his jokes hilarious but I’m also a huge fan of puns too, so maybe I’m not the best judge of what’s funny.

  Todd, my step-dad, has two grown kids. Shelley is a single mom. She’s 35 with 5-year-old twin boys. Her ex is a deadbeat so she’s parenting on her own and doing a kickass job of it. David is my brother’s age, 30, and he is married to Meg. They have a 2-year little girl who I totally want to steal. As a matter of fact, I try to steal her every Sunday, but I’ve only managed to get her to my car once.

  I walk into the living room and the twins run over to me and grab onto my legs. One on each. I’m always happy to see them, and I take a lap around the room with them attached to my legs and giggling. They finally release me and run back to their Legos. Then I seek out Mia who’s chubby cheeks I can’t wait to squeeze. She’s sitting in David’s lap, so I grab her and sit beside him on the couch. She’s babbling in her own toddler speak and I just start babbling back.

  Dan looks over at me. “You look like you’re feeling better.” I’m about to ask him what he’s talking about and then I remember that I was supposed to be sick last night so I just nod my head in agreement.

  He goes back to talking to David about baseball and I go back to making faces at Mia. My phone pings, reminding me that I got a text earlier, and I grab it from my purse. Mia snatches it from me before I can look at it and starts swiping. You’d be surprised how much a 2-year-old can do with a phone. The kid even has her own iPad. She is spoiled rotten but the iPad was a gift from Dan and me, so I guess it’s partly my fault.

  I see that’s she’s on my messages and pressing buttons and I decide that if I ever have kids I’ll have to put a lock code on my phone.

  I grab the phone back and notice that she’s typed a nice little message out. The message I just received was from Char. It just said she’d meet me for drinks on Monday after work. However, the message Mia has replied to was the one from Parker last night.

  Me: asjdkonfewiaonvdahg;ane

  Parker: Day drinking already?

  Me: Ha-ha, no. Not today anyway. A very cute two-year-old princess stole my phone.

  Parker: The ladies, they do love me.

  Me: You’re not her type. Too tall, too old, you probably have cooties, etc.

  Parker: Darn, looks like I’m going to die alone.

  Me: I already had that revelation a few days ago.

  I should really keep my mouth closed. Or I guess I should metaphorically muzzle my fingers since I’m typing. I realize that I sound slightly pathetic bringing up my revelation that I’m going to die alone. Mia is grabbing for my phone so I just hold it out of her reach as I wait for Parker to reply. I’m not paying a bit of attention to anyone else in the room, but apparently, they’ve been watching me.

  David says, “What’s got you so smiley?” I just ignore him as I bounce Mia up and down on my knee.

  Dan is apparently curious as well. “Who are you texting, Mace?”

  I think about responding that it’s none of their business but I realize that a response like that will look as though I’m hiding something. Which I’m not… not really. So I just say, Char. Which is technically the truth because she did text me earlier and I’m going to text her back.

  Todd laughs, “Of course, you two are joined at the hip even when you’re not in the same place. Why didn’t she come over today?”

  “She had to work this afternoon.”

  Dan narrows his eyes at me. “If she’s at work then why is she texting you?”

  Shoot, I didn’t think this through, as usual. She had sent that message earlier before her shift started and she never has her phone with her because she leaves it in her locker. Dan is her second best friend so he knows this. I’m good at bluffing though so I roll with it.

  “She always makes time to text her best friend.” I give him a smug look. He snorts at this. It’s always a competition between me and him about who her best friend is. It’s stupid because we all know I’m number one.

  “Well, she never texts me during work. I distinctly remember her telling me they aren’t allowed to have their phones.”

  I respond, “I guess she just likes me better. I’m worth the risk.” Dan rolls his eyes. He really needs to work on that. He’s 30 years old. I mean, I roll my eyes all the time. It’s second nature, but I’m also not an old man like him. You’d think he would have better manners by now, especially since he’s engaged to Lauren. She’s super anal about stuff like that.

>   Before I know it, it’s time to eat, and not a moment too soon, so we head into the dining room. The table is huge, but it kind of has to be to fit everybody. Our family grew exponentially when Mom and Todd got married a year ago. Before that, it was just Mom, Dan, and me. Our Sunday dinners were a lot quieter back then, but certainly not as much fun.

  I’m itching to look at my phone but I don’t want to draw more attention to myself after earlier, so I silence it and stick it back in my purse. I definitely don’t want Dan to know that I’m texting Parker. Not that he’d care. He’d just rag me about it nonstop and that annoys me to no end.

  The food is amazing and I’m glad I’m wearing a flowy dress because if I was wearing pants I’d definitely have to unbutton them. I speak from experience. I’m not proud of that fact, but it’s a fact nonetheless.

  I start to say my goodbyes as I snatch up Mia and head to the door. Meg stops me before I get out the door and grabs her daughter back. My plans are once again foiled.

  “She looks just like me, Meg. We have the same eyes. Blue eye color is a recessive gene, you know. This is not a coincidence. I think she’s my kid” The kid really does look like me even though we’re not blood-related in any way.

  Meg just laughs and takes the chunk back into the living room. I head out to my car and grab my phone as I’m walking.

  Parker: Maybe we can die alone together.

  Parker: … Or not… did I lose you there?

  Parker: Maybe we could go eat somewhere together instead of dying?

  Parker: Ok, this is getting embarrassing since you aren’t replying.