Queen of the Demonweb Pits

by Paul Kidd - (ebook by Flandrel; Undead)

  “Wish me luck, Hen.” Escalla cracked her knuckles and prepared to change shape. “Were the tanar’ri imps or quasits? I forget. Wait! Wait! It’s quasits! Right! Got it!”

  There was a brief pop, and Escalla disappeared. In her place stood a hideous little demon—horned, clawed, with a sting on its tail and a cookie-cutter mouth filled with teeth. Escalla’s distorted voice came from the beast as it skittered off into the rubble.

  “Back in ten!”

  Enid watched her best friend go, and arched her brow. “Eerie.”

  Escalla the quasit kept a hard grip on her frost wand. It was too late now to ask her to leave it behind. The hideous little demon shape hopped up onto the rocks, then disappeared.

  Long, anxious minutes passed. Beyond the lingering sound of screams, a strange rustling sound could be heard. It was the sound of a vast multitude of creatures on the march—an army moving slowly away. The wind blew through the ruined city, making the rubble shift and hiss. Jus kept Benelux in his hand, and Cinders’ red eyes scanned the ruins. Henry kept watch. All seemed quiet.

  A giant spider came out of the ruins, dragging a corpse wrapped in silk behind it. It moved awkwardly, finding the burden heavy. As it worked, a quasit came bounding out of a window. The little demon ran fearlessly beneath the spider’s legs. Annoyed, the huge black widow hissed but left the quasit alone. The spider disappeared around a corner as the quasit slipped into the shadows and sat happily beside the Justicar.

  There was a pop, and the quasit now wore Escalla’s face.

  “Right! They’re loading that spider palace up with loot. Gold and stuff. They’re getting ready to move out.” Escalla lashed her little demon tail. “I think the west tower of the citadel might give us a way up onto the spider palace roof. From there we can slip across without being seen.” The girl stood, took a peek out of cover, then waved the others on. “Coast is clear! Let’s go!”

  She changed her head back into quasit shape. The Justicar moved like a vast, silent bear as he followed her. Next came Enid, with Polk running at her heel. Henry spied a coal lump in the ruins, pocketed it for Cinders, then scuttled awkwardly backward, covering the rear with his crossbow.

  The entire town lay empty. The gates were smashed in, and the few small towers crumbled from blows made with demonic force. Bloodstains splashed the walls in dry brown crusts, and the courtyards reeked of death. But there were no bodies—no slaughtered guards, no dead ladies-in-waiting. Lolth’s minions had scoured the city clean, taking every corpse for the value of its meat. Escalla the quasit waited in the shattered gateway as her comrades caught up. She peeked about a corner, scampered across a dangerous patch of open ground, and waved her friends to follow. Jus crossed at a dead run, disappearing into darkness as he dived behind a door. With a nervous glance at the walls, the others followed swiftly and slipped into the empty castle halls.

  They descended into a kitchen that had been thrown all awry. Pots and pans were crushed and buckled. A charred, twisted human skeleton lay over the cooking range where it had burned. Enid leaped over the party and landed at the opposite door, where she stood peering and thrashing her tail.

  “I hear singing!”

  A strange music drifted through the air—joyous, carefree, the sound of a girl without a care in the world. The music was unearthly, and strangely unsettling. Her fur standing on end, Enid nosed open a door and peered into a long, dark corridor.

  The singing was louder. Enid edged forward, her nose sniffing. Hurrying across the kitchen, the Justicar caught up with the sphinx. “Enid, careful!” he whispered.

  There was a hissing squeal as a giant black widow spider launched itself out of the corridor straight at Enid’s face. Jus lunged, but Enid merely stamped her foot. Her big paw smashed the spider to the pavement, swiftly followed by another spider clinging to the wall. She trod the monsters as she walked into the corridor.

  “It’s only spiders. Come on!”

  Jus looked down at the squashed spiders, met Escalla’s gaze, and shrugged. He followed behind Enid as the big sphinx padded down the hall toward a glimmer of light.

  The singing grew louder, more gay, and beautiful. Enid settled down on her haunches beside a shattered wall, peering curiously out into the light.

  “Oh! Look here!”

  Escalla avoided squished spider, scampered over to Enid’s side, and joined in the view.

  A courtyard spread itself under the sky. The walls were lined with flayed human corpses that had been nailed to the stones so that the impaled bodies formed a grisly colonnade. Once-graceful flowering trees now had skulls hanging from their branches like fruit. A portable stove seemed to be cooking toasted cheese, and the broad fountain, beautiful with mosaics, now brimmed with milk and almond oil. Sitting happily in the bath was a drow woman of stunning beauty. In the pool her silver hair floated all about her sheer black skin. Her eyes were quicksilver fire, and an aura of darkness shimmered from her skin. The drow beauty sang as she lolled in perfect happiness. She sang like a choir of angels. Behind her, shambling, imbecilic slaves milked a cage of butterflies to help top up the woman’s bath.

  Standing at the edge of the bath and looking extremely annoyed was a strange tanar’ri female. A thin, sharp featured woman with bobbed black hair with a tart expression on her face, she was consulting a notebook and shooting meaningful glances at a big hourglass propped beside the bath.

  Watching the scene below, Escalla cocked her frost wand.

  “Check it out! Hoo-hoo! Bathing in butterfly milk! Gal after my own heart!” Escalla changed back into normal form, buck naked, armed, and dangerous. “’Course, I’m still gonna have to kill her nasty.”

  In the courtyard below, the black-skinned beauty stood to rinse her hair. Henry stared at her naked figure in shock. “You mean that’s Lolth?”

  Escalla stretched and posed. “Sure! Check out her arse! You only get perfection like that in goddesses and faeries!”

  “You can tell just by her bottom?”

  “Yeah. Well, that and the pall of total evil that surrounds her.” Escalla kept her back flat against the stone wall, looking for a way to creep closer to Lolth. “Come on. Maybe we can get closer.” Escalla risked another peek at Lolth. “Hoo-hoo! Natural blonde!”

  She moved onward.

  Henry followed, whispering in fright. “I thought Lolth was a sort of spider!”

  “So she smartened up her grooming habits a little! Now come on!”

  Down in the courtyard, the six-armed demoness finally convinced Lolth to leave her bath. The six-limbed woman was forced to set her notebooks aside, find the goddess a towel, then pour Lolth a drink. The Justicar watched the creature at work, feeling almost sorry for her. The woman’s six arms were always busy.

  “I wonder who she is?”

  “Easy.” Escalla leaned close and gave everyone a nudge. “See? She’s a handmaiden! Get it?”

  A dire glance came from Jus. “You’ve been working up to that one for a while?”

  “I’m a comedy natural!”

  Lolth was leaving. The adventurers moved swiftly into the castle, following with all due stealth. Lolth’s voice could be heard in conversation with her six-armed assistant. They spoke in the language of the tanar’ri—sibilant, hissing, and in Lolth’s case, almost beautiful.

  Jus levered open a door. Lolth’s voice sounded louder, closer. The goddess was capable of all manner of magical spells. Their one chance of eliminating her was a surprise attack. Jus crept across a bloodstained room to another door, let Cinders listen, and then signaled Henry to take position to open fire.

  “Wait!”

  Escalla dived into the portable hole and returned with a little folded packet. She sprinkled diamond dust over Jus, her wings fluttering and her eyes crossing as she wove her spell.

  “There! Stoneskin! It’ll block the first half dozen hits you take.” The faerie looked regretfully at the packet, mourning the passing of her engagement stone. “If she lays a glove on any of
us, we’re finished!”

  Escalla readied a spell. Enid unsheathed her claws. Polk settled his hat, and Henry knelt with his magic bow pointed and ready to fire. The Justicar took one brief look over his comrades, gave a nod, and flung open the door.

  They had reached a balcony overhung with a crushed and broken ceiling. The view looked out over another open courtyard, and the tail end of Lolth’s procession could just be seen exiting through a distant gate. Shambling slaves carried milk buckets and clothing. The six-armed demon brought up the rear, three curved swords jutting through her belt.

  Lolth’s party drew out of sight. With a glance to make sure they weren’t seen, the Justicar led a stealthy advance along the balcony.

  Down!

  Cinders’ warning came a split second before a red streak flashed. Jus dropped to one knee, his sword catching a blow that should have smashed his head in two. Sword blades rang—brilliant red against blinding white. A figure tumbled from beneath the ceiling, spinning as it fell, and then the blades crashed against each other in a blur. A red blade hit Jus across the back, spitting sparks as the sword uselessly struck Escalla’s stoneskin spell.

  The eagle-helmed warrior had clung upside down between the roof beams. Hissing, it fought in a mad stammer of speed, the red sword like a streak of light as it strove to slaughter the Justicar. Jus blocked the attacks, then Cinders blasted out a massive gout of flame that engulfed the far end of the balcony.

  The cadaver leaped clear an instant before Cinders’ flames struck, and it clung to the rafters like a bat. Annoyed, the hell hound fired again, and this time the corpse shot away like an arrow, leaping over Jus’ head. The Justicar spun, blocking a sword stroke that sheared at his head. Cinders’ flames boiled and thundered along the balcony, sending the others diving madly away. Hovering in midair, Escalla worked the arming slide on her frost wand.

  “Hey, bony! Suck on this!”

  The Justicar swore and dived aside. Enid crashed into Henry and covered him as she threw herself into cover. Cackling with glee, Escalla fired her wand, a blast of ice smashing into the balcony. The undead monster turned agile handstands, bounding away. Escalla followed, playing a storm of lethal cold and razor sharp ice shards all over the creature as it fled.

  “And that, my friend, is that! You took on the wrong gal’s squeeze! No one touches the faerie!”

  Deadly clouds of frost cleared. The cadaver emerged, its teeth set into a snarl, silent and deadly. The red sword in its hand sheathed the creature in a glow that had kept it safe from magic.

  The grin fell instantly from Escalla’s face. “Holy mother pussbucket.”

  The Justicar struck from behind, blindingly fast, but Recca caught the blow. Sparks showered from their blades, and Benelux screamed in pain.

  That hurt!

  Jus tumbled free, and in his hand, Benelux’s gleaming metal showed a scar.

  The red sword! Benelux fluttered in panic. It’s full of blood from last time! I think it gets sharper the more blood it has!

  Enid roared and leaped, and Jus swung at the cadaver. They tried to bring it down from both sides. The monster parried Jus, twisted away from a punch that could have snapped its neck like a twig, then turned a somersault over Enid’s two hefty claw blows. The cadaver landed at Enid’s side and slashed with its sword, ripping a gash along the girl’s flank. Blood was instantly sucked into the sword. Enid reared and roared, cracking a wing out to try and bowl Recca over. The corpse jumped easily over the huge wing, then staggered as Henry leveled his crossbow and opened fire.

  The magic crossbow blurred, hammering out five bolts that tore into the screaming cadaver. The monster staggered back, then surged forward again, shot through the neck, chest, and skull. It tore the crossbow bolt out of its own eye, and the wound flared and healed. The withered body glowed with light as the hellish creature rebuilt itself. It started toward Henry, then whirled and parried as the Justicar’s blade stabbed a lightning-fast blow at its spine.

  Henry drew his sword and tried to fight, only to have the weapon struck out of his hands. Escalla whirred in with her lich staff, but the corpse leaped and dodged, spinning over her. Only the Justicar held his ground. He locked blades with the monster, then shot his arm over Recca’s forearm, trapping him tight. Perfectly partnered, Cinders opened fire. The hell hound’s flames blasted into Recca’s face, blinding the monster and melting the helmet’s surface. The undead cadaver hurled away, then staggered and fell as the Justicar severed its leg at the knee. Enid attacked again, but her blows were blocked, then the one legged monster leaped clear, hurtling back at the Justicar.

  A miss from the red blade hit the wall, and solid granite shattered like porcelain. The Justicar roared and swung his sword down in a blow so massive it drove the undead monster to its knees. Sparks showered as blade met blade. Jus’ huge strength kept his enemy crushed to the ground, and he kicked Recca’s face with one heavy boot, breaking the corpse’s neck, skull, and jaw. The monster ploughed over the balcony and smashed to the ground two dozen feet below.

  “We did it!” Escalla was exultant. “The dead dude’s toast! Teamwork rules!”

  Everyone rushed to the balcony rails. Below them, Recca sat, reached hands to his head and reset his own broken neck with a crack. Green blood pumped from his injuries, and where the blood touched his dead flesh, his wounds disappeared. His eyes were still regrowing, but already footsteps thundered as Lolth’s guards came to investigate the noise. Jus grabbed Polk under one arm and threw himself back through a door into the citadel. The others followed suit, Enid staggering and weak. The Justicar slammed a hand against Enid’s wound and sent a pulse of healing magic into her. The wound closed after the second spell, and Jus instantly led the way up a shattered flight of stairs.

  Outside in the courtyard, there were yells and screams. Something had apparently interfered with Recca’s healing. The Justicar raced up a flight of circular stairs, pounding hard and fast. Escalla shot through the air and took the point. Enid squeezed the whole stairwell shut behind. They ran and ran until the stairs ended in a door. Jus smashed heavy oak and steel open with one crash of his shoulder.

  The door opened upon a rooftop. Wind whistled, and from this great height, all the world seemed exposed. The flattened, ruined city lay all about. Flooded plains stretched for miles around. To the north, a vast army scuttled, slid, and marched beneath a cloud of abyssal bats. Beside the citadel stood Lolth’s titanic mobile palace. The huge machine squatted like a tarantula. Lolth and her entourage were mounting steps into the monster’s maw. A gap of fifty feet led from the citadel roof to the spider palace’s gleaming back.

  Jus flicked out the portable hole and leaped inside. Henry and a protesting Polk were pushed in after him. Holding the hole in her mouth, Enid gathered and sprang out into the open air. Her wings lofted her effortlessly across the gap, while Escalla flew beside her, covering the jump with her wand.

  Enid landed on the spider’s broad metal back—and everything went wrong. Her feet skated out from under her. The metal was as slick as butter. She thrashed her wings impotently, unable to fly, and began to slide toward the ground a hundred feet below.

  Hovering nearby, Escalla landed—had her own feet shoot out from under her, and began to slide. Her wings wouldn’t lift her. As Enid slithered past, the faerie turned into a snake, her clothes hanging loose on her coils, and whipped herself out as a lifeline to hold Enid by the paw. Eyes bulging—tail wrapped around Enid and her neck wrapped about a jutting piece of metal, Escalla gagged as Enid hauled herself up to safety and tried to cling flat against the slippery, greasy metal.

  Flailing at the end of Enid’s paw, Escalla the snake tried to get a grip on the metal hull. “Jus. Help! We can’t fly! Something’s wrong! We can’t fly!”

  Escalla was being torn in half. The Justicar shot out of the portable hole and slipped. Groping for the magic rope on his belt—a rope taken from an erinyes a few short months before—he grabbed Enid by the scruff of her ne
ck and lashed the rope like a whip. It wrapped itself about a porthole cover. The Justicar roared and tried to hold on, but Enid’s weight was too heavy.

  With a ponderous lurch, the spider palace began to move.

  It rose from its crouch, its legs straightening. Hanging desperately on the magic rope, Jus felt the whole world give a sickening sway. Rocking like a ship in a mad sea, the spider palace trundled over the ruins of Keggle Bend. With Enid slipping in his grasp, Jus gripped the sphinx and Escalla, the magic rope cutting into his hand.

  Ringing like monstrous bells, the spider palace’s feet crashed over stones and splashed into muddy fields. Jus felt his grip giving way as the palace moved ponderously toward its gate to the Abyss. The magic circle gave off a sickly light. A stench of death, decay, and filth leaped into the air.

  Jus’ grip slipped. He roared and caught himself, blood leaking from his palm where the rope burned through his hide.

  “Hold on!”

  Henry appeared in the mouth of the portable hole and tried to stab a handhold into the palaces hull. Escalla turned into an octopus, her flailing suckers failing to take hold of the alien metal. Jus slipped again. The air around them turned thick with sulfurous smoke, ash, and death, and suddenly the whole team fell.

  The bronze hull slipped past in a blur, and then the group was falling free. Escalla turned into a bat. Tumbling free, Enid thrashed her wings, felt resistance, and thrashed madly at the air. She broke the fall and saved them all from death. With a lurch, she crashed into the ground. The universe shook as titanic metal feet thudded to the ground beside them, and the spider palace marched on its way.

  They lay on a field of ashes. The sky above them was purple as venous blood. Distant shapes wheeled and screamed in heavens that stank of death. Lolth’s spider palace clanged and crashed, disappearing into the murk with frightening speed—and suddenly the adventurers were alone.

  Escalla fluttered down and returned to form. Henry and Polk had fallen from the portable hole. They lay beside Enid, who blinked in shock, staring at the sudden change of scene.