by Jaime Marks
The Priestess sighed as she studied him but nodded. “There are, but they will be far easier to hear and I only say it to confirm your suspicions. The Lady Felycia is also Sacred Borne. Her Mother is indeed human but at the will of Lucerna a Sacred Mate was created for Lord Devyn a Devyion. It was necessary to help him heal and she knew it would help to bridge the gaps in the race when the time came.”
“What does that mean exactly, Alysse?” Devyn requested. He’d been standing quietly while they’d been dealing with the fallout of Kyle’s Mother’s reality.
“It simply means that the Lady Felycia is indeed your true mate. She holds a piece of your heart. You are meant for one another.” Devyn nodded and kissed Felycia gently.
“Whether it be at the hand of Lucerna or the Divine Being himself, all the unions present here are Sacred Borne,” she offered with a bow. “I will take my leave. I know you have much to sort through.”
They watched as she misted from the room. No one spoke for a while. It was like they were all shell shocked or something. Kyle couldn’t blame them. It was a lot to take in.
“Why is it she almost never has anything simply good to say?” Cymeryn sighed breaking the silence. “It is almost as if when she gives us good news it has to be either complexly difficult to understand or laced with information that is difficult to bear.”
Marcus clasped his shoulder. “We must try to remain focused on the positive. You were right about there being a connection to Kyle and this merely means that he truly is home. If we focus on the rest it’ll be enough to drive us all insane.”
Kyle rose and pulled Astryn up with him. He couldn’t handle any more of this. “Unless you need something, I need time before you expect me to sit through the meeting of the Council Elect.”
Cymeryn nodded slowly. “Do you wish me to accompany you, son?”
“No, I need some space. I don’t mean any disrespect, I just…it’s too much,” he shook his head and guided Astryn out of the room.
He needed to figure out how he felt about all of this. It wasn’t Cymeryn’s fault and he had no reason to be mad at him but he just didn’t want to talk about it right now. He needed to cool off.
Cymeryn watched him go. He had no idea how to make sense of this for him. “How do I help him through this when we cannot deal with it ourselves?”
Kato turned to face him. “You show him that you do not think any differently of him. He needs to know that he is still your son and still the Fae he was before this was revealed. In truth there is likely nothing you can say. He will come to terms on his own.”
“If you don’t treat him the same as you did before, you’ll lose him. I can guarantee you the only thing keeping him here right now is that it’s the safest place for Astryn. Even if he thinks she’d be better off without him he won’t risk leaving her safety to anyone else. They’re already bonding,” Byryn offered cautiously. “It’s not easy finding out everything that you believed about yourself is a lie.”
Cymeryn studied him a moment. “How are you handling it? It was obviously a shock to learn the truth of your lines and I am aware that discovering Wytheryn was difficult. I know Grifyn revealed your true lineage to your brother but I have heard he feels that we are merely manipulating him.”
Byryn shrugged. “I’ve come to terms with most of it. Wytheryn is another story. He doesn’t exactly come across as being open to Redemption and the guy literally hates me. At the same time if I’m to believe we have the same Mother then he’s part Fae. Given what Alysse told us about Teryn’s essence he might even be Sacred Borne. Wytheryn can’t be as Dark as he presents. There’s just something so, I don’t know, fake maybe? I can’t place my finger on it but I always feel like he’s not being genuine with me, maybe not with anyone. I don’t know how to reach him.”
“We will make time to talk to him together,” Marcus replied, “but not today. Kyle is right about one thing. We all need sometime I believe.”
Reyana stood and walked from the room without another word. It was not that she had issue with Kyle himself. She just could not deal with the fact that her Mother had died protecting the secret of her sister and in doing so denied her the right to ever know her. He could also feel the rage she felt that her former husband had not only taken advantage of her but her sister as well. It upset her greatly.
“How long before the meeting?” Cymeryn requested. He knew they would have to help ease their Queen.
“Not long enough it seems,” Marcus quipped also sensing her turmoil, “but we will have to make do.”
They were all feeling the backlash of the announcement. The only saving grace was that Kyle was indeed alive and well. He had to wonder if he had died would they have even known the truth or would the secret have gone with him to his grave.
Chapter 21
Astryn climbed onto the bed next to him. “You alright?”
“I will be,” Kyle shrugged as he looked her over. She was worried about him and he couldn’t have that, no matter how screwed up his head was right now.
“Come here, mea.” He lifted his arm as she curled up aside of him. Just having her close calmed him. “I don’t want you worried about me. The important thing is that Talerys won’t be bothering you with any more of his bullshit and your Father won’t be able to try to force anymore suitors or fake mates on you.”
“Right and I’m happy about that, but I’m still worried about you,” Astryn sighed. “Is it really that bad though? I’m not trying to diminish the weight of it, but your Mother was still your Mother and it doesn’t sound like she was a bad person. It sounds like she just had no idea who she really was.”
He thought about that for a minute. “Mom only ever wanted me to have a normal life, a human life. When my sperm donor came to visit she would make dinner and pretend everything was normal. Even though she knew that she’d be forced to share her bed with an unawakened Shade that could care less if she was dead she always tried to shield me from it. It was bad enough when she behaved for him, but it was downright hell if she fought back. They’d fight every time he took me to my Grandfather’s for my lessons because she said I should be allowed to grow up human.” He ground his teeth through the memories. “I always knew I was part Shade. Syneous insisted that I know my heritage and birthright, although his name was Sean then. He came and went as he pleased though, so most of the time it was just me and Mom.
“When he stopped showing up she met a man that finally made her happy. He was human. Took me fishing and taught me everything good that I ever learned about how to treat a woman.” He glanced down at her with a smirk, “or a female. She knew the punishment if she got caught but she kept him around because she said it was important for me to learn that not all men were like my sperm donor. She said it didn’t matter what I was. I didn’t have to be like him and his friends and I should always be true to myself, even if I had to hide it when they were around.”
“Why do you call him sperm donor?”
“Because that’s what he was. He might have been my biological Father but the only thing he ever really contributed to raising me was his sperm. He wanted me dead. I never knew why but he never minded reminding me of the fact. He never taught me anything worth a damn. Byryn and John kicking my ass taught me more about surviving in the world of the Shade than he ever did. He never earned the title Father so generally unless he was standing right there to demand it I called him by his name or sperm donor. Even then I tended to get around it.
“Cymeryn, he saved my life, offered me a chance to make my own way just for doing the right thing; like I should’ve done in the first place. He even risked his own life to rescue me. He’s more my Dad than Syneous ever was. There’s just something about him that I know I can trust. I thought I couldn’t have explained it if I tried but maybe it’s because we’re actually related and went through similar versions of hell.”
He shrugged it off not wanting to make too big of a deal out of it, even if it was to him. He’d seen enough to know th
at all that was just part of who Cymeryn was. He took care of his line and did what he thought needed to be done. No one had ever put themselves on the line like that for him before though. Even Byryn would’ve put him out if his Dad hadn’t given him a chance. Knowing he cared about him, the chances he’d given him, they meant everything to him.
“So then what you need to ask yourself is, has anything you’ve learned today changed any of that?” Astryn broached carefully as she brought his thoughts back to the crap Alysse had laid in his lap.
Kyle considered it for a while. “Not really. It just means I know more about who my family is, who my Mom really was, I guess. It just pisses me off that she had such a difficult life all because her parents couldn’t deal with the consequences of their actions. I mean, she never should’ve had to endure all that. She wasn’t some dirty secret and it pisses me off that they just gave her away and left her to try to figure shit out on her own. I’m angry, but no, it doesn’t change anything now. No one here even knew the truth so I guess it’s not really their fault.” He leaned down and kissed her head. “Thank you, mea. I didn’t think of it quite like that.”
“Anytime.”
She sat up for while looking down at him. Her tongue wet her lips and he knew what she wanted, but she was too sweet to ask and too shy to take. So damned pure and sweet.
He smirked at her. “What do you want, Astryn? Tell me.” She blushed and he reached up running his finger gently down her cheeks.
“What makes you think I want something?”
He chuckled, “I can sense you, mea. Even if I couldn’t, it’s in the way you look at me. The way you blush,” he teased. “You don’t need to be shy with me, Astryn. If you want to kiss me, you can. I would never deny you.”
She blushed again and looked down in embarrassment.
“What is it, baby? What are you afraid of?”
“What if I don’t…I don’t know…do it right?”
He had to smile at her innocence. “Mea, anything you don’t know I’ll gladly teach you when you’re ready, but we’ve kissed before. Your kisses are sweet honey on my lips, baby. I promise, you’ll be fine.”
She leaned down slowly and he held himself still, allowing her to come to him. Her lips pressed to his ever so tentatively, kissing him so softly at first that it made him want to devour her. He didn’t dare. She needed to learn to trust herself and him. Slowly her hand slid from where it rested on his chest up into his hair. As her confidence grew her tongue slid out teasing his lips, tasting him. He opened for her, holding himself back so she could set the pace as she explored his mouth, their tongues slowly dancing together. Wrapping an arm around her back he pulled her down on top of him so their bodies were flush to one another’s. She gasped into the kiss but didn’t break it.
When she pulled back he leaned up and kissed her chastely, caressing her cheek. “Perfect.” She blushed and he chuckled, “I love the way you blush, Astryn.”
She smacked his chest and he couldn’t help but laugh. He was starting to understand why Byryn liked picking on his sister so much. Astryn was cute as hell when she was mad.
“Yeah, well quit it. I swear you would have me blushing all day if you could.”
He watched her a minute thinking back to the night he met her. He wanted her to remember today, not for its chaos and all the crap with his lineage, but because it was the day she became his in so many ways. She wasn’t his completely, of course, but no one else would be able to court her now without one of them granting it, which would never happen.
In so many ways today was the day she became free because her Father couldn’t dictate her life anymore. She might’ve been from the moment Cymeryn brought her here, but she hadn’t believed it. Now she knew no one could take that from her and he would always protect her if they tried.
“Don’t make plans for tonight, alright?”
She studied him quizzically. “Why? What did you have in mind?”
“You’ll see.” He tapped her nose and she snapped her teeth playfully at his finger. “It wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you, now would it?”
Byryn kept a sense of Kyle’s mind as they walked back to their chambers. Part of him felt as if he should maybe go check on him or something, but he was attempting to block his thoughts. He knew nothing he could say would make any of this easier to swallow. His progeny had to find a way to come to terms with it on his own. The only person who really had any chance of reaching him right now was probably Astryn. They were bonding and as fast as it might seem, she was quickly becoming Kyle’s anchor just like Staryana was his.
He thought back to when he’d entered Cymeryn’s office and saw Talerys. The way he was looking at Astryn had triggered a fierce protectiveness in him. Really he’d had to keep himself in check because what he really wanted in that moment was to put Talerys through a wall. Some of it was actually what Kyle was feeling being fed through their connection, but he wasn’t kidding himself. He’d been every bit as enraged and protective of her as his progeny was at the time.
The situation with Astryn was odd for him in a respect. He felt a strong connection to her now. With his and Kyle’s bond strengthening, his attachment to her was growing. He didn’t know what to make of it. He’d always liked her. When he’d found her and Talerys arguing in the corridor after the Claimings the other day he’d felt an strong pull that compelled him to protect and care for her. Now he was pretty sure if that prick or anyone else hurt her he’d tear them apart just as badly as he would anyone who hurt his baby. How the hell Kyle had managed to hold it together through that shit had been beyond him.
Then again, that was the difference in their upbringing. Byryn had never had to restrict himself like that, well not until the night of Felycia’s attack. He’d always been free to let his rage and anger flow even before he was Commander. In fact, Trevyn had encouraged it. Kyle on the other hand had often been in situations that he’d had to hide what he was thinking and force himself not to react. It was probably second nature to him really.
With a sigh he reached out across their connection knowing the best thing he could do for him was to give him space, “Take the time you need, but if you need me, I’m here.”
It was a promise and he meant it. The bonds between them were strengthening. There was a closeness between them he couldn’t explain. Some of it was confusing as hell, but in a lot of ways it just felt right. There was only one person he felt closer to and he turned his full attention back to her as he pulled her close.
A twinge of guilt ran through him when he considered how Kyle would probably feel about how he’d treated his sister earlier. The only thing he’d asked of him was to care for and protect her. In some ways it felt like he was betraying that promise, but in others he knew that he was doing as she asked and seeing to her needs. It fed some deep seeded need that echoed through him and filled him with satisfaction, but…she was his mate, not his slave.
He pulled Staryana close as they entered their chambers and guided her to the bed. Byryn made her lay on her stomach, lifting her skirt. He had the Healer drop off some balm under the guise of a training injury and he wanted to take care of his baby.
Gently he massaged it into her cheeks. Her soft moan brought a smile to his lips. He knew just touching her was sending small pulses of pain through her and that combined with the tender massage was driving her crazy. They were so well matched in so many ways. He just wished he felt better about this one.
“You’re bruising some, baby. You sure you’re alright? I could heal this for you,” he offered hopefully. As much as he enjoyed laying his marks on her skin, he didn’t really like the idea of her in pain.
She turned her head to the side so she could look back at him. “Byryn, I promise the pain isn’t that bad and you have no idea how good it feels. I don’t want you to heal me. I want to feel it. Every time I do I remember your hands on me. I need that right now.”
He nodded absently. Some Shade females felt that way, thos
e in better situations. He just wasn’t sure how he felt about Staryana needing to feel it. She hadn’t been like that before Lazurys took her and he’d had a hand in that.
She rolled over to meet his gaze. “Stop. You can’t guilt yourself over what happened with Lazurys. It’s over and I don’t want to think about it anymore, but if you can’t get him off your mind how can I get him off mine?”
Byryn sighed knowing she was right. Their minds were too closely linked for her to block out thoughts about the bastard if he was struggling to do so. “I know. I just…we came back different, Staryana. Both of us. Our bonds are still strong and we’re still us, but I can feel it and I know you can too. I just don’t know what it means.”
She looked away but he didn’t feel any shame from her, only calculation as she weighed through their options. “I know. I haven’t tried to talk to any of the others about it yet. I mean, the only real examples I have are sexual and I’m not exactly going to talk to my Dads or my Mom about that. I’m not sure anyone else would understand either.”
“Yeah that would go over well.” He frowned considering it, “I know what you mean though. I thought about talking to Cymeryn because he’s my Grandsire. Honestly he’d probably understand what we were going through better than we do but, he’s like a Father to you now. Besides, Marcus and your Mom pretty much know everything he does. My Dad sure as hell wouldn’t get it. It’s probably important that we figure out someone to talk to though. I mean, we should make sure we can, right? Isn’t that what you and Kyle said? That you couldn’t tell anyone what was happening?”
She chewed her lip. “No, we couldn’t, but we’re talking to each other. Isn’t that enough? I couldn’t talk to anyone about anything to do with the Darkness that was infecting me last time. It was like the words never came no matter how hard I tried.”
He leaned down and kissed her head. “I don’t think so, baby. Lazurys wanted us bound to him together. He was adamant that we complete our bonds to him together because we would strengthen each other. I would assume if he managed to accomplish that he would want us to be able to confide in and communicate with each other. Let me think about it, ok? Maybe I can figure something out.”