Cortigiana (A Vamp Life Prequel)
Page 6
“I do love you.” He said suddenly. “I have been with the greatest beauties you can imagine. Seen the most romantic spots in the world. None of them compare to you, and I can no longer lie to myself. Every day I watch and every time I see you, you are lovelier than when I last looked upon your face.”
The revelation could not have been better imagined in my many dreams. In the fantasies, I had the ability to respond with the skill of a poet. Not so in reality. With mouth slightly agape, I simple shook my head and looked down at my hands. Antonio lifted my chin and caressed my lips with his. He tasted of the fine wine we’d had at dinner.
“Tell me the words I begged you to forget.” He whispered between brushes of his mouth against mine.
“No.” I said without conviction. “You will break my heart because you are afraid of Dante. I refuse to let you hurt me again.”
Antonio’s fingers were moving with skill and precision as he worked to lift my dress. “I promise to love you in secret like you proposed before. He will never know.” His arm went around me and his palm rested against my back as he pulled me against him.
“Can we run away?” I asked. A secret love affair I would take, but I wanted out of my life with Dante if possible.
“We do this my way or not at all. It is your choice.” He waited, surveying my face, anxious for an answer.
I was a hopelessly in love girl that would do anything he wished, so I nodded. “I love you,” was my answer and he accepted my response by slipping his length into my heat and filling me over and over with the perfect movements of his hips. The gondola rocked side to side as he made love to me. To this day, when I’m on the water or it’s raining, Antonio crosses my mind.
His large body sweetly smothered me in the tiny shelter. Maybe I should have resisted, but once I told him that I still loved him, he had little intent on asking permission to take me. Luckily, torturous months spent wanting him had left me in the same state of mind.
Whenever my voice grew too heated, too loud, he’d hold his hand over my mouth or seal in my delightful noises with his lips and thrust that much harder. He was a man possessed, released, growling. Once his resistance had broken, any semblance of restraint vanished. Dante may have been called “Master,” but Antonio and I both knew who owned me by the time we had finished.
Antonio nuzzled into my hair, panting heavily, wanting to take me again. He kissed my bottom lip, once… twice, and then reluctantly put a little space between us as he lowered my skirt and smooth the silk to cover my legs. With one palm on each of my knees, he pushed them together.
“I,” he cleared his throat and rubbed his brow with the back of his hand, “I am not sure what came over me. When you said those words, I lost control.”
His eyes lowered and I feared he regretted taking me. “You should lose control more often.” I panted, putting my fingers in my hair and shaking out the locks. The rain had left it a mess even before the sex.
“I am too dangerous when that happens.” He took both my hands in his and fell to one knee, kissing the tops of my fingers on each. “I swear to never hurt you physically.”
“I know.” I eyed him, confused why he would worry about harming me and why he would make such vows.
Little did I realize, giving myself to Antonio with reckless abandon that night would seal my fate. Dante had been able to hear our hushed voices, our professions and promises, and our moans of ecstasy from a balcony window. Sanuto was not a vampire to be crossed and I would learn the hard way how ruthless he could be.
When Dante returned from his meeting, I almost vomited because I was that scared of being caught. Antonio and I had tried to take care of any evidence of our illicit encounter. I had remained in the shelter, while Antonio had stepped outside into the rain.
“I hope you took good care of Evelina.” I heard Dante say almost too calmly.
“The rain came on quickly. She is a bit wet, but fine.” Antonio answered.
“Take us home, then. I must leave early in the morning.” He poked his head into the cabin to check on me.
What if he can smell the scent of sex in the air? I drew in several slow, deep breaths. I could.
Forcing on a smile to hide my fear, I greeted Dante. “Such unpredictable weather.”
“Yes.” He said simply, looked me over and then turned away.
Without so much as a goodbye, Dante and I parted ways with Antonio when we arrived at the mansion on the Grand Canal. I had started to relax a little. Dante didn’t appear to have any idea of what had transpired. He’d led me to my room which surprised me. I had expected to spend the night with him since he was leaving on business.
“Is something wrong?” I asked. The words were barely audible.
“Nothing. I… hate to leave you alone. Before I leave I will speak to Giulia so you will never be out of her sight.” Dante was agitated, but there was something else as well. Sadness? I could see it. Whether he knew something about my sin or was worried about leaving I couldn’t tell. “Do you love me?” He asked suddenly.
For the second time in one night, a man wanted me to say those loaded words. Maybe I should have told the truth. I wonder if it would have changed the way things happened. “Yes, Dante. How could a girl not love you?” I smiled sweetly.
He flashed a devilish grin that chilled me to the core. “On second thought, let me make sure you don’t forget me for a few days.” In an instant, he was behind me, pushing me toward his quarters. It was one of the most difficult nights of my life. I spent it face down while Dante gave me a gut-wrenching goodbye.
He was gone when I awoke the next day. I could barely walk and had bruises all over my body. Dante wasn’t known for being gentle, but I’d never taken a pounding like that before.
Shame found me. I was in my room, looking myself over in the mirror and it unexpectedly gripped me. Hard. A good, honest person would have told Dante the truth no matter what the consequences. That person was not me. I was weak, scared, and concerned only with what I wanted. Integrity had not fit into that equation.
A knock on the door drew me away from the mirror. I tugged on the sleeves of my dress and wore my hair loosely around my neck to hide the numerous marks of evidence from my rough night. Another knock caused me to curse under my breath.
“Yes?” I called out.
“It is Giulia. Antonio has brought up your meal. If you are dressed, I will send him in.”
“I am not hungry, thank you.” I said.
There was faint whispering between the two. I placed my ear against the door to hear what they were discussing. Giulia answered a question.
“No, sir. She must be lovesick. Earlier she would not eat or let a servant attend to her.”
Several more bangs on the door made me jump. “Evelina, open this door right now. You need to eat.” Antonio yelled.
“Go away. You are in no position to give me orders. I am the mistress of this house.” I placed my palms against the wood separating us and bowed my head. There was no way I could face the man I loved, looking the way I did, and after what I’d had to do with Dante.
“She does not know you are more than a bodyguard, does she?” Giulia asked.
“No. Let us keep it that way.” His voice grew hard. “That is an order.”
I could hear the sound of his shoes as he stalked off down the hall away from my room. Guilt and shame were such terrible friends to keep. After walking to the balcony, my favorite place of solace, I wiped the tears from my eyes for them to instantly be replaced by fresh ones. I sat down and idly picked one of the flowers growing in front of me. One by one, I plucked away the petals and let them float lightly down to the water outside. For what must have been hours, I did this as I tried to figure out a way to reach a happy ending. The same thought kept coming to me and it made me hate myself even more. Dante Sanuto needed to die for me to be free.
“Open this door right now.” Antonio said with impatience when I didn’t answer for the third time. His tone frightened m
e almost as much as Dante did. I mean, what did I really know about the man? From day to day, he changed. What he wanted changed.
“Please leave me alone.” I called out.
“You have been in this room for two days and have barely eaten. Grant me entry or I will break this door down.” His voice sounded strained and I envisioned him clenching his teeth.
Hesitantly, I crossed the room and let him inside. He pushed by me, slammed the door, and grabbed me firmly by the shoulders. I turned my head so I would not have to meet his gaze. This caused my hair to fall to the side, revealing the hectic pattern of fading bruises along my neck. They had never taken so long to disappear before.
“This is….” For a moment, Antonio appeared to be losing his quiet control, “This is more difficult that I imagined it would be.”
No words spilled from my lips because I had none to comfort him. I’d spent every moment since my last night with Dante wallowing in remorse. Antonio’s stare bore into me so severely that I had to turn my back on the man I loved. Pleasing many lovers as a courtesan had been easy. This was different. My heart could not bear it. It was as my mother had warned me.
“Evelina, I should not have been weak. This affair is my mistake. The vibrant, young woman that somehow touched my heart appears lost to me now.” His hands rested on my shoulders from behind before carefully gliding around my waist to embrace me.
“Take me away, Antonio. We will go far away to a place no one will ever find us.” I closed my eyes as his face nuzzled against my hair.
“It is impossible. We would be found. Besides, this… this is my home.”
It was my home, too, but I was willing to leave Venice and never look back again. “I have some money. We can make a new home somewhere. Please. I cannot take another night like that, not with him. Kill him if you must.”
Antonio turned me around to face him, burying my pleas beneath his warm lips. He pulled my body into his, keeping me close. Protected. The shame stayed, but somehow it faded a little when we kissed. My lover accepted what I had to do to maintain the lie. This made me realize, despite how perverse it felt, I would do anything or anyone if it meant I could be with Antonio.
“Do you think he suspects us?” He asked, briefly removing his mouth from mine.
“No.” I whispered, once again avoiding his eyes.
“Look at me.” The words didn’t form a question, but an order. I forced myself to do as he asked. “We have a month, maybe longer, to live and love as we please within this room and any other secret rendezvous spots we find around the city. Forget everything else, but the time we have together right now. Can you do that?”
I was unsure if I could, but I nodded. “Yes.”
His hungry mouth touched mine again and he picked me up, carrying me across the room to the bed and lying me down carefully. On the boat, the need had been urgent, hasty, and passionate. This time, he attended to my needs in a way my other lovers never had. With the softest touch of his tongue and stroke of his hands along my hips, I reached a plane of existence I never knew was real. As I rode out each wave of pleasure, I struggled to push his face away. It was too much. But, after each plea for respite, I begged for more to counter the request.
By the time he was done, I collapsed and sank into the covers beneath me like they were a fluffy cloud. Antonio slid up from where he’d been working his magic between my thighs and lay beside me. When I moved to return the favor, he placed a hand over my stomach and held me in place. All he did was hold me. He asked for nothing else. No man had ever done that before. My job required me to fulfill fantasies, but this was not work. This was love and I never wanted to give it up.
A whisper made me clench my closed eyes in protest. “Evelina.” The forbidden, deep voice spoke again. If the man were a dream, I didn’t want to wake up. His strong hand gave me a little shake and I finally opened my eyes.
“Antonio.” I sighed breathlessly and smiled. “Mm, it was real.”
He smiled in return, placing a tray over my lap when I sat up. “You have slept late. The first meal of the day has already been served.”
“Sorry. Did you stay with me all night?” I asked, using a silver spoon to gather some of the hot soup. Also on my plate was a portion of pasta, meat, and something to drink I had never had before.
“Until morning, yes. There were some things I needed to attend to.”
My attention, still on the drink, caused me to barely listen. I picked up the cup with both hands and inhaled the scent. The smell equaled heaven and my mouth watered. “What is this?”
“Chocolate. It is worth more than gold or silver. No one else here knows about it. Another secret between you and me.”
A tiny bit anxious, but intoxicated by the scent of the foreign chocolate, I lifted the drink to my lips and cautiously took a sip. It was the beginning of yet another love affair. One that would never end. The chocolate, rich and thick, tantalized every taste bud. It would have been bitter, but I could taste the sugar and vanilla beans that sweetened the beverage.
“This is the best thing I have ever tasted.” Almost as good as sex. I thought, but wisely left that part unsaid. “Where does it come from?”
“The chocolate beans come from across the ocean. I have a friend in Spain where the drink is popular. They crush them up into a fine powder.”
Amazed, I took another sip. I had been introduced to many foods during the Renaissance feasts, but never chocolate. “Thank you, Antonio.” Then, the wheels in my mind started turning. “We should travel across the ocean to the New World.”
Antonio shook his head and sighed. “Do not start that again. The trip would be too much for a woman and it is uncharted land. This place that they call America is far from ready for you to explore.”
“I could do it. Giulia is on equal footing with every man here. There is no reason I would not be fine.”
“I will hear nothing else about it.” He said.
“Forget I said anything. Living in the now.”
“Correct.” Once again he sighed, but stole a glance at me out of the corner of his eye. I could see a faint smile despite how much I frustrated him and maybe a hint of something else. An idea forming. “You would really journey there with me?” He asked, after two seconds earlier telling me to drop the subject.
“Yes. Anywhere.”
Days spent in my lover’s arms rapidly pushed worries from my mind. As my concerns faded, I nearly forgot about the impending return of Dante Sanuto and the dire obligations I would have to face. Nothing else mattered but Antonio. I was young and in love in the greatest city in the world. Art and music surrounded me. The fact that an outbreak spread across the city and worsened each day evaded me.
“Dance with me.” Antonio extended his hand and I accepted with a curtsey.
“There is no music.” I said. We were sequestered in my room, as often was the case.
That’s when the romantic musical notes drifted from below and into my open window. I released Antonio’s hand and ran to see where the sweet tones were coming from. The notes reminded me of the song my music box played. Below, a lone man in a boat skillfully glided a bow across the strings of a violin to create the lovely sound. The man and the music were one. I closed my eyes briefly, losing myself in the beauty, before returning to Antonio and taking his hand once more.
Although well-educated in the techniques of dance, the delicate movement and soft embraces Antonio and I shared could not be taught. Something deep down inside me resonated with him as we flawlessly expressed our needs, desires, and dreams in fluid motion.
“You are an angel sent to save me.” He whispered with a lightness of breath when he held me close, then dipped me backward and let his lips brush down my chest. Slowly, I was raised up to face him again.
“Save you from what?” I asked, as I was spun around and he pulled me close again, this time with my back to his chest.
“Myself.”
I had no idea what he meant, but the reverence his
voice held for me nearly hid the hint of self-loathing that accompanied it. Our bodies swayed back and forth together, as if we had all the time in the world and yet none at all.