Thirteen Cents: A Novel (Modern African Writing Series)

by K. Sello Duiker

  “When will he be back?”

  “When he’s finished eating. He gets very hungry, T-rex, and there is nothing big here so he goes down below to eat the people.”

  “Does he eat children?”

  “Yes, he eats everything,” she says proudly like a mother, “he doesn’t waste.”

  “Do you think he’ll eat me?” I say, a little scared.

  “No. But he will if you don’t stay.”

  “Then I’ll stay,” I say.

  “You know there used to be many T-rexes.”

  “How many?”

  “Four.”

  “But that’s not many.”

  “Have you seen T-rex before?”

  “No,” I tell her.

  We hear loud thumping noises outside and the earth shakes a little.

  “That’s T-rex,” she smiles coyly, “do you want to meet him?”

  “Why?”

  “He’s my husband,” she says, a little insulted.

  I go outside with her and we stand on the roof of the cave.

  Down below in the city we see T-rex stomping over cars and tearing apart buildings; chewing people but they can’t scream because their lips are sewn together with wire.

  “That’s my husband,” she says and squints to get a better look at him.

  I watch him destroying the city and feel scared. We go back inside.

  “So he’s the last T-rex, then.”

  “No, you are, he’s getting old.”

  “Me? But I’m still growing.”

  “I know,” she says and looks at my scales, “you are going to be big just like him.”

  “Really?” I say and my eyes grow big.

  “That is your father.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me before? I’ve been searching for him.”

  “Because you never asked me,” she scolds me, “you asked me where your home was.”

  “So this is my home?”

  “I don’t know. Do you like it?”

  I don’t answer her for a while.

  “I like it here but I don’t know where to sleep.”

  “You must sleep where you like.”

  “Can I sleep in here?”

  “Of course, don’t you remember? You used to sleep here.”

  “But where will you sleep?”

  “With T-rex,” she says and hides a naughty laugh.

  “But I’m hungry.”

  She cooks meat over the fire. She adds herbs and other things that smell nice. I eat all I can.

  “I was very hungry,” I thank her.

  “What else do you like to eat?”

  “Sometimes when I’m really hungry I eat rats but they are not tasty.”

  “Why?”

  “Because they just smell of piss all the time, even their meat.”

  She sighs. I can see she is a little sad but I keep talking to make her think about other things.

  “I’m really tired,” she says, “I must get back home.”

  I look at her sadly as she leaves. When I go outside she is gone and it is misty. So misty that you can’t see your hand when you put out your arm in front. She must be quick, I think and go back inside. After a while Gerald comes in. He finds me cooking some meat over the fire. He sits next to me and tries to speak but his lips are also sewn together.

  “Don’t try and speak, your lips are bleeding,” I tell him.

  He makes muffled sounds and points wildly with his fingers.

  “What, you’re hungry?”

  He nods.

  “No, you can’t eat.”

  He bleeds as he tries to speak. The blood drips to his bare chest.

  “Oh wait. I can hear T-rex outside,” I say excitedly.

  The earth rumbles.

  “I think he’s calling you,” I say and turn over the meat. It burns on a stick. Gerald goes outside. I follow him out of the tunnel. The mist has cleared. In the distance we see T-rex. He stomps and takes big steps.

  “I think he wants you,” I tell him and pat him on the back.

  He shakes his head.

  “You have to go. You know that, don’t you? I’m too little to eat you. But I’m growing up fast.”

  He shakes his head.

  I smack him with my tail and he falls. He cracks his head on a rock but still gets up. T-rex gets to him and chews off his head. Snakes pour out of his neck. He slashes them with his sharp nails and eats Gerald. I go back inside to finish cooking my meat. I put it over the fire for a while. When it’s red and bleeding, I eat it.

  18

  I wake up feeling thirsty. It is hot again and the sun is up. I go outside and take off my jacket and pants. I put them on the slab of rock to air them and climb on the roof. The other idiot’s left but I see he tried to make a fire. It’s a small thing. I stand with my rough feet in the ashes and piss. The sun shines. I feel its heat on my face. Today I’m going to swim, I tell myself. I get down excitedly and wash at the stream. I think of nothing but swimming. I drink lots of water. Afterwards I put on my clothes and walk to the other side.

  I pass tall grass and climb up rocks. My hands are also beginning to look rough. My skin peels but it doesn’t bleed. From the highest point on the mountain I look around and go towards the hills. White people are everywhere. They think they own this mountain, I say to myself as I look at them eating Simba chips and drinking Coke. They point at things like they fear nothing. Look at this, look at that, I hear them say. Let’s go here, let’s go there. And they walk like they own the road. They don’t look at the ground. They only look ahead of them. That’s why animals are always running away from them when they try and see them up close. White people don’t know fear and animals know that.

  I walk on my own, the sun always behind me. I go down a steep path with railings and begin to see water, blocked by a long wall. I walk towards it. I get onto a bridge and walk. I get to the other side of the bridge and see the water. This is what that idiot was talking about, I think. I look around and there is no one. I take off my clothes and lay them on white rocks. The whitest rocks I have ever seen. The water is a dark brown colour. Near the water’s edge tadpoles swim.

  As much as I want to dive in I decide against it because there are rocks. They are beautiful but they are still rocks. I take a few strokes and swim out. The water is warm on top but below my feet feel cold. It must be deep, I think to myself. I don’t swim far out because I saw water pouring out of the other side of the bridge. If I’m not careful the pump will suck me out. I cut into the water with my arms. I feel strong. I think of nothing but the water. When I float and look around, the water seems black. You can’t even see your hands underneath. It’s a bit scary but it’s still water, I encourage myself. A man walks down the bridge towards me. I swim quickly back and forth, splashing everywhere.

  “Excuse me,” a coloured man says standing on the rocks, “you’re not allowed to be in there. This is a reservoir.”

  I swim towards him. I get out of the water naked and go for my pants.

  “Sorry, you’re not allowed to be here. Regulations,” he says as I put on my pants.

  “Are you like the police here?” I ask as I look at the things on his shoulders.

  “Something like that.”

  Why do grown-ups always say that? I’m not stupid. Why can’t he just tell me what he really does?

  “But it’s hot.”

  “I know, but it’s not allowed.”

  * * *

  I stay on the mountain for four days. Every night I make a big fire in the cave. I burn all sorts of things, mostly arms and legs and lots of monsters. And every day I wake up early and swim at the reservoir before that man comes to work. I have great swims and learn to play with water alone.

  At night I have strange dreams. I always see Saartjie. I remember one dream very well. I was walking near the reservoir at night with her. The moon was hiding. We made a small fire to see in the dark.

  “Mantis is angry,” she says to me with her big eyes.

/>   “Who’s Mantis?”

  “He stays on the moon but sometimes he walks the earth.”

  “He must be able to fly.”

  “He can do anything. He made T-rex.”

  “Did he make you?”

  “Of course,” she says like I asked a stupid question, “he’s my father.”

  “So why is he angry?”

  We sit under a tall tree that looks like it doesn’t belong there. She starts sobbing. I just sit there. After a while she stops crying and wipes her tears.

  “I don’t want to cry but things are difficult.”

  “What things?”

  She shows me an old wound under her breast. I can see maggots crawling in the wound.

  “Mantis,” she says looking at the wound, “is very angry.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “The eagles stole my babies,” she starts to cry again.

  “Eagles?”

  “They fed them to T-rex. But he didn’t know they were his babies. That’s why Mantis is angry,” she says and sucks green at the back of her throat before continuing. “Mantis is very angry. Nothing can be done to change that.”

  Then, in my dream, I take out a small bone from her ribs. I use it to take out the maggots under her breast. Then I sew up her wound with some string. I tie another piece of string to the bone and hang it under the tree. We sit and watch maggots crowding round the bone. They become so many that we have to move from under the tree. We sit near the rocks and watch the reflection of the sky in the still water.

  “Mantis is coming,” she says, terrified.

  When we don’t expect it an old man suddenly appears.

  “This is my father,” she says sadly.

  He walks with a long cane and his back is bent. His skin is dry and he has many wrinkles like someone was drawing lines on his face. And his eyes are like dirty water. They are murky and hold scary secrets. I watch him closely as he takes small steps.

  “You must go back into the earth, Saartjie,” he shouts when he reaches us. She starts crying.

  I get up to greet him but he smacks his cane on the ground. My bum itches, so I sit down. I look at him with fear.

  “You tried to cheat me,” he yells with an old voice.

  “It was his idea,” Saartjie says and wipes her tears.

  “And who are you?”

  “My mother was a fish,” I tell him in my dream.

  “I ate her,” he says carelessly. “Now tell me who you are!”

  “I’m not sure,” I tell him, “but they call me Blue.”

  “Sometimes when you’re sleeping I swim in your eyes. It keeps me young.”

  “So you want to cheat death?” I challenge him.

  He stares at me with the scariest eyes I have ever seen.

  “I want to see T-rex. What have you done with him?” Saartjie suddenly demands.

  “Nothing.”

  “Then why didn’t he come back home tonight?” she starts crying again.

  “She is always crying,” I tell him.

  “I drink her tears,” he says.

  “Why?”

  He doesn’t answer me and then says something strange.

  “The stars have told me that you’re the nothing. You eat anything and everything. You’re always hungry and you’re always thirsty. But you won’t eat me. I am going to kill you.”

  “No! Go and leave Saartjie alone. The stars have told me. I can also hear them.”

  “You are the devil’s child. Only a stupid man like that would have a child like you.”

  He turns around and walks back. He disappears into the night.

  “Why are you still crying?” I ask her.

  “Because you killed my father.”

  “But I was saving you. He was going to kill you.”

  “I didn’t ask to be saved. You’re not the only one who knows things.”

  We watch the fire. It burns slowly. Bats fly around us and disappear. A fish splashes in the water.

  “I used to stay by the river once,” I tell her.

  “Why don’t you go back?”

  “It was a long time ago. I don’t really remember where it was.”

  “What made you leave?’

  “People. It’s always people. They cut me up into little pieces and spread me everywhere.”

  We stay out for a long time but the sun never seems to rise in this dream.

  “Mantis was so angry he stole the sun when he died,” she says.

  “Where did he take it?”

  “He ate it. And it burned him to ashes.”

  Again we sit in silence.

  “I will tell you a secret,” Saartjie suddenly says. “You are the sun’s child,” she says and smiles.

  “But Mantis stole it.”

  She looks at me and starts to cry.

  “I’m tired,” she says.

  “I must go now,” I respond and get up.

  “You can’t leave me alone,” she tells me.

  “What do you do when I’m not here?”

  “I wait for T-rex,” she smiles.

  “Then wait for him.”

  “But I can’t wait for him alone.”

  “Then who do you wait with?”

  She looks the other way. I sit down angrily and dust rises.

  I look at the water and feel angry for letting myself be here with her. I wait for her to fall asleep to make my escape but she never sleeps. She keeps talking to stay awake. She talks about silly things. I get bored and get up to take a piss. When I pee my water is bright yellow and starts shining and becoming fire. I pee for such a long time that my bright yellow water becomes the sun. When I get back it is morning and she is nowhere to be seen. I go outside to look for T-rex but he is also nowhere to be seen. So I sit on the roof and stare at the sky.

  The sun warms up my scales.

  19

  After four days on the mountain I leave. I take nothing from the mountain except my jacket. It is cloudy, the morning I leave. And a strange icy wind that I’ve never felt picks up. I put on my jacket and walk for a long time before I meet someone. The first person I meet on my way down is a Rasta. His dreads are long and fall over his shoulders. He walks with a stick which seems to have a life of its own. I look into his eyes and know that he is going to plot evil on the mountain. He looks back to me as I start my descent. You are evil, I say to myself and go down.

  The next person I meet is a white boy with orange hair. He smiles and I see that his teeth are dirty. They are brown. He wears a white T-shirt with a blurry image of a runner. I try not to look at his dirty smile as he walks by. He has bad breath and smells of sweat. I go down further, the sun hiding behind clouds. I walk faster to warm myself up. I take off the jacket and turn it inside out. I wear the orange colour outside to attract the sun.

  I meet other strange people who give me angry eyes when they look at me. They look at me as though they know what I have been doing on the mountain. Even though I look thinner, I feel stronger and protected by an invisible silence. Something seems to walk with me as I pass them. A guy nearly trips because he looks at me with such hatred. I don’t feel scared. I don’t hesitate. I don’t trip. I look all around me. I look above me and the sky is still quiet, holding secrets.

  Eventually I get to the road which is at the foot of the mountain. I see a white car parked in the distance. I walk towards it. It looks like a white Grenada, Gerald’s car. I go towards it and feel nothing. The windows have been tinted black. I get closer and all of a sudden the engine starts. The car revs before it drives off. It leaves a cloud of dust as it speeds down the road. I fear nothing, I tell myself, not even the dark.

  I go down another path where the dead trees are. My feet guide me. I listen to everything. A thought comes to me: the dead trees are dead dreams. I wonder what that means? I think and keep walking. I scratch in my pocket and take out my money. Thirteen cents. I must have lost one cent on the mountain. I put it back in my pocket and keep walking. It is a nice walk
even though the sky is sulking with clouds. I start to feel warm and open my jacket. The further I go down the warmer it gets. And it is humid too. When I get to the black rock I turn back and look at the sleeping mountain. A blanket of mist covers the top and moves to the edge. I see dragons and monsters when I look at its edge.

  It starts to drizzle. I don’t mind because I haven’t washed. The tiny drops of water feel cool on my face and chest. I close my jacket again. I walk past the little lake but no one is swimming. There are no families sitting around the tables. Water falls quietly. I can hear trees sighing with relief. They are thirsty. They have been thirsty for a while. The grass becomes softer and doesn’t crackle when you walk on it. It just makes a soft shushing sound. I walk out of the trees till I get on the cricket field. The grass is green and short. There are no school children. I walk around the field and start to hear the city. Taxis hoot, dogs bark and in the distance the big boats burp like whales. I walk down a steep slide of dried grass. I climb down into a ditch that continues for a while. I come across a dead cat – there are flies and maggots all over its mouth and eyes. I step over it and get back onto the road. It is still drizzling. My jacket is my raincoat. I wear it with pride and my feet are warm.

  I go towards the bus station to look for fruit that the hawkers may have thrown away. I look in a few discarded boxes and find a mango. It is over-ripe but at least it is still clean. I flick off three ants and start peeling it. My hands get messy. I think of the cave as I lick them clean. I think of that girl in my dreams. I can’t forget her face. I eat the whole mango and clean the big pip, which looks like a head of blonde hair. I hold it in my hand and go towards the train station. I pass many people inside, all rushing to work. With so many people you’d think someone would bump into me. But no one does. They walk as though they know where they are going. I go to the Men’s toilet. A row of men stand pissing against the wall. I go to a tap and wash my hands. Water drips. I go out and walk towards town. I pass Subway and go towards that busy road where town ends. I go between cars when the robots are red and go towards the bridge. I think of nothing but the sun. It stops drizzling.

  I go to Liesel’s first but her shack has been destroyed. I walk around and see quite a few other shacks have been destroyed. In the corner I can still see Gerald’s shack but his car is not there. I go to Ma Zakes’ spaza and find it closed. A woman with a baby strapped to her back walks up to me. She has terrible scars, railway lines running all over her face like someone wanted to change it. I look at her heavy eyelids. “Who are you looking for?” she asks.