“Oh, thank you!” Pride bubbles in me.
“I’m getting married in six months and wondered if you would be up for catering my wedding? Now, before you say anything, Blair did tell me you are supposed to be heading back to South Africa at the end of this week. So for completely selfish reasons, I got hold of my bosses on Breakout and told them about your food. They are willing to give you an audition of sorts tomorrow, and if you nail it, they’re willing to give you a one-year contract with the possibility of an extension, if things work out.”
Holy effing shitballs! What is happening right now?
Chantel takes my silence as hesitancy. “It would be catering for the judges and crew while the show is in season, and I already know a few people got your information from Blair last night, so I have no doubt once word spreads you’re going to be in demand. If you got the job, the show would arrange for visas etcetera. I know it’s short notice, but can you come down tomorrow afternoon around lunchtime and show off your talents?”
“I…uh…” Dammit, I need to say something, but my brain won’t work without coffee.
“Think about it and shoot me a text when you decide. I’d need an answer by this evening, but please say yes. I can’t live my life with the lousy show catering now that I’ve tasted heaven.” Chantel giggles again. “What can I say, I love your food.”
I agree to think about it and hang up the phone. I stare down at the screen and see three missed calls from Blair that I obviously slept through and eight texts. I open the texts.
6:03 BLAIR: I guess you’re still sleeping off the tequila. You’re such a lightweight. *winking emoticon*
6:30 BLAIR: Call me when you get this. I have news!
6:45 BLAIR: No, I’m not pregnant. This is news for you. Call me.
7:15 BLAIR: Dammit Mads, call me. I can’t contain my excitement.
8:00 BLAIR: YOU ARE KILLING ME!!!
9:07 BLAIR: Seriously! Dean is getting pouty because I’m too distracted to have morning-after-I-got-married sex.
9:08 BLAIR: This is Dean. She’s lying. I’ve already sexed her good. Call her back or I’ll start giving you the juicy details.
9:45 BLAIR: Ignore my husband. Eeeck, I can’t believe I get to call him that. But seriously, you better not sleep through Chantel’s call. This is an amazing opportunity for me to have my best friend living in the same country as me. Yes, I’m selfish. It’s because I love you and miss you too much! Call me dammit!
I smile down at my phone when I realize last night’s meltdown was potentially for nothing.
Ugh, I feel like a giant idiot for crying on Keller the way I did. All this time worrying I was going to lose everything important to me when one phone call from Chantel Prescott, of all people, can change all that.
I feel the stirrings of excitement in my belly. Could I really have all my dreams come true in one fell swoop? A job doing what I love—feeding people. Catering for weddings and functions as well as working on a show like Breakout—what could possibly be better? Get to live in the same country with my best friend and maybe, just maybe, things between Keller and I could become a more permanent thing?
I mean, he hasn’t mentioned anything, but there have been the gifts and I’ve been staying with him for two weeks. That seems to me like he wants more than a friends-with-benefits thing. Maybe he just hasn’t mentioned it because of the distance factor? But that wouldn’t have to be a thing anymore. I could get my own place, and we could see how it goes.
After texting Chantel that I’ll do it, I jump up and down in the kitchen, punching the air in triumph as I allow myself this glimmer of hope.
I need to call Mom.
♫
I just caught Mom as she was leaving the grooming parlor. She’s excited about packing for her trip to Europe with Bob. When I told her about Chantel’s offer, she squealed so hard my ear is still ringing, so I don’t hear Keller step onto the patio and come up behind me. His strong hands curl around my shoulders, and he gives a gentle squeeze.
I look up at him over my shoulder. “I hope I didn’t wake you?”
He smiles and takes a seat, tugging my arm and pulling me into his lap. He has sweats on, and I can feel he’s still sporting his morning wood.
Keller moves my hair to the side and kisses my neck. “How are you feeling this morning?”
Excited, thrilled, scared shitless, and freaking on top of the world, but I know he’s referring to the tears last night.
“Embarrassed, especially after getting a really great phone call this morning.” I turn to face him. “Can we completely ignore my little meltdown last night? In South Africa we have a saying. It’s called being dronkverdriet. It basically means ‘drunken mopes.’ I had a serious case of the drunken mopes last night, but I got an incredible call this morning that might just solve all my problems.”
His finger grazes my chin. “Yeah? Tell me about it.”
“Well, you know Chantel Prescott, one of the judges from Breakout?”
“Yeah, Kade works with her.”
“Yes, I met her at the wedding yesterday. Well, she called this morning and offered me a job. She wants me to cater her wedding, but more than that, she got me a food audition for the show. If I get the job, I can stay in America. She said they’d arrange the visas and everything. I’d have a dream job, and I could be close to Blair, I could get an apartment and…” I cut myself off when I feel Keller stiffen beneath me, and not in a good way.
His face is unreadable as he slips me off his lap. Heading inside, he pours himself some coffee. “So you’d be working permanently for the show?” He swirls the remaining coffee in the pot. “Want some?”
I grab my almost-empty cup and drink the cold dregs before handing it back to him. “Please.”
He pours the coffee into my mug and hands it to me. “Didn’t I tell you your food was incredible?”
“Yeah, but that was when we were naked and I was on top of you.”
Keller smiles. “You aren’t on top of me now.”
I close the gap between us, trailing my finger down his bare chest. “Not yet.”
Keller grabs my hand and kisses my fingers before taking a step back. Everything about him is stiff and tense and…distant. “I better hit the shower. I’ve got to head to the studio for a meeting about our music video tomorrow. When is your audition?”
I swallow. “It’s tomorrow, noonish.”
“I’ll call a car so you can go get what you need to prepare.”
“Thanks.” Geez, I hope he didn’t hear the squeak in my voice.
“You’re gonna smash it, Madison.” He turns and walks into the bedroom, closing the door again behind him.
Madison! When did I become Madison again? The name for the girl he just wanted to fuck and not be friends with.
My phone rings and I look down to see Blair’s name on my screen. When I answer she’s squealing so loud she makes my mom’s sound like a whisper.
I fill her in, forcing myself to push the worry down enough to get swept up in my best friend’s enthusiasm. As the conversation progresses, I feel myself get more excited.
I smile to myself.
One day at a time, Maddie. Nail this audition and you can figure everything out after that.
Twenty-Four – Collision Course
Keller
“Mama always used to say if you keep your face pulled in a grouchy expression, when the wind blows, it’ll stay like that,” Annalise says as she adds more fucking powder to my face. I loathe this part of the job. Piles and piles of gunk and goo just so we don’t look like a corpse on camera. Usually, I take it in stride and zone out, but today is different.
Sitting in this chair, I’m fucking trapped in my thoughts and how fucked-up I am about Maddie moving to LA.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for her. She deserves this. Being close to Blair and a dream job. But I can’t keep my poison from spreading if she’s too close. And I can’t stay away from her either. Having Maddie living near me
will be a test of control I’ll almost certainly fail. I know it will only be a matter of time before all the darkness in me dims her light.
I move to scrub a hand over my face, but Annalise swipes it away. “I will end you. It’ll look like a bloody accident.” Her face is serious for the longest time, but then she giggles. “Name the movie.”
Annalise plays this game with us every time we’re in her chair. She’s been our makeup artist ever since we started with Valcan Records, our label, and it’s her easy-going attitude and sense of humor that makes this process sufferable.
Most days. Today isn’t one of them.
“Cat in the Hat, but you got the line wrong. It’s ‘I’ll get you,’ not ‘I’ll end you,’” Kade pipes up from next to me where Vicky is running gel through his hair for a lot longer than is necessary, if you ask me. She’s been trying to get Kade to fuck her since she started as our stylist four months ago, but he isn’t interested. If he dates, we don’t know about it. Not since Emily. And that ended so fucking tragically, I don’t blame the guy.
“Oh I know, sweetie,” Annalise says sweetly, “but I will end Keller if he tries to scrub a hand over his face one more time.” She turns back to me. “What is it with you today anyway?”
“Yeah, Maddie not putting out as much as you hoped?” Josh calls from the couch.
I flip him the bird.
“Ooh, there’s a Maddie? I need to hear more.” Her voice turns excited.
“Are we done here?” I ask. I know I’m being a dick, but I don’t want to get into this with Annalise or anyone.
She squeezes my shoulder and removes the white tissue paper from the collar of my distressed tee. “Sure, sweetie. We’re done.”
“Thanks.” I grab my bottle of water and head onto the set. The music video we’re recording is for our latest single “Bonds of Submission,” and it’s taking place in some dude’s dungeon in the basement of his house. I don’t even want to know what kind of shit goes down in here, but to each their own.
“Keller, what do you think?” Trevor, the director, beams at me as I enter the room.
I look around the set. I have to admit it looks pretty awesome. The room is massive and lit by the hundred or more candles placed at intervals. One half of the room contains our instruments and has red silk draped as the backdrop. The other half has been left looking like a dungeon and is going to be used for the “submission” part of the music video. According to the script, we’re all going to be shackled to the wall, and a model they hired is supposedly going to “seduce” and “torture” us. This should be as much fun as a fucking root canal.
“Looks great” is all I manage to get out. Good thing my role is a tortured soul.
It shouldn’t be a hard sell at this time.
I need to get my act together before we get this show on the road. This is the second time I’ve brought my shit to work, and both times it was because of Maddie. I had a fucking plan. She was supposed to go back to South Africa, and I was supposed to try to forget about her.
“What’s got your panties in a bunch?” Josh claps me on the back.
I’m about to tell Josh if I need a therapy session I’ll hook myself up with one when my blood runs ice-cold over the epic fucking catastrophe that is my life. Shannon, who I haven’t seen for twelve years, walks hesitantly in the room dressed in a long flowing Victorian gown the color of fresh blood and matching red lips. Her eyes lock with mine, and I watch her inhale a shaky breath as she smooths her inky-black hair falling in a sleek sheet to her waist.
“Fuck me, but I think I just jizzed in my leathers,” Josh blurts.
What the fuck is she doing here?
Josh doesn’t notice my reaction. Without missing a beat, he saunters over to Shannon and introduces himself. Something he says has her laughing and looking marginally more relaxed than she was a moment ago. When I see Kade walk into the room, I approach him and grab his arm, pulling him to the side. Confusion flashes across his face.
“Did you know about this?” I say through clenched teeth.
“About what?”
“About her. Did you know who they were hiring?”
Kade glances over at Shannon, who is flicking me concerned glances.
“First time I’ve seen her. They had an agency send the model. What’s the problem?”
“The problem is, she’s my fucking ex.”
“Oh shit.” Kade scrubs a hand through his hair.
I don’t answer Kade. Instead, I stalk over to Shannon, stepping in between her and Josh. I hear his indignant mutterings, but I ignore them.
“What are you doing here, Shannon?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” She points to her long flowing gown. “I’m here to torture you.”
I have a feeling the smile she shoots me is supposed to come off as teasing and relaxed, but it falls flat.
I take her arm and guide her gently to the side. She’s a lot thinner than she used to be and I feel a knot of dread form. “Did you know this job was with my band when you signed up?
She chews on her lip. “I did. I wanted to see you again.”
I don’t fucking believe this. After twelve years of keeping the lid on everything, Shannon could blow it all out of the water in one day.
My stomach bottoms out. “Then you call, Shan. We agreed we’d never see each other again.”
She crosses her arms. “No, Kel. You ordered me to never see you again. It went along with burying our dirty little secret.”
Her green eyes cloud with the same tortured look that burns in mine.
“So why the fuck did you come back?”
“I thought maybe now that you’d made your dream come true and I had a career of my own, we could…”
“We could what, Shan? Pretend our fucked-up games didn’t paralyze a guy and ruin his whole goddamn life?”
Her eyes glisten, and she swallows hard. “I…”
“You shouldn’t have fucking come here.” I point a finger at her. “This was a mistake.”
Trevor claps his hands, interrupting us. “Oh good, everyone’s here. We’ve only got use of the space until tomorrow, so we have to get moving on this. Can everyone get in their places?”
I walk over to the far wall, inhaling lungfuls of air like a dying man. Kade walks over. “You good?”
“Fucking excellent,” I murmur sarcastically.
Kade glances at Jeff, who shrugs his shoulder. Trevor takes Shannon to the side and explains what’s going to happen while Peter, one of the crew, comes over and tells us we need to get behind our instruments.
“Alright, everyone in their places?” Trevor calls from the director’s chair. “Action!”
We spend the next few hours playing along with the soundtrack while Derek, the cameraman, takes shots of us from various angles. The candles amp up the heat, and it feels like a fucking furnace in here, but that might just be because I feel my life is about to implode. Even though she doesn’t need to, Shannon stays on set. I feel her eyes on me the entire time, and Kade keeps shooting me nervous glances. It takes all my willpower to keep a stoic expression on my face.
Since we don’t have much time, we have only a short break before Peter shackles us with our hands above our heads and our feet splayed apart. Eventually we get to the part where Shannon needs to play the fucked-up seductress who uses torture and mind games on her victims.
Trevor calls action again. Josh is first in line. Shannon moves over to him, trailing her long nails over his bare chest, and Josh moves into her caresses.
“A little lower, baby. I’ve got a little something for you.”
Trevor yells cut, and Josh looks sheepish.
“Sorry. I can’t help it. She’s fucking gorgeous.”
“No, no, that’s perfect. We’re going to take it from the top. I want to see more.”
We start again, and Josh flirts with Shannon. She laughs and giggles, but keeps shooting her eyes to mine. I don’t meet her gaze. I keep staring at the floor, my jaw c
lenched so tight I’m sure I’m going to snap a fucking muscle.
Derek films a couple of shots of Shannon acting like she’s whipping Josh before Trevor calls cut. Annalise rushes over to start applying her special effects makeup so that it looks like he has deep bleeding welts across his chest. Later, they’ll piece it all together in the editing process. If I wasn’t so messed up right now, I could really appreciate how cool it is going to be after it all comes together
While they are busy with Josh, Shannon is told to move on to Jeff. She uses her riding crop to whip the wall next to him after being given strict instructions not to touch him. None of us know what that’s about, but we respect Jeff’s privacy enough not to push. It’s the same briefing every time.
I wish I’d fucking said the same.
When Shannon gets to me, she presses her body right up against mine. “So tense, Kel. Remember when you used to love me being this close to your body?”
She presses her lips to mine, and I pull away, glaring at her as I yank on my restraints. When I look up, Maddie is standing at the doorway looking from me to Shannon. She has a basket full of cupcakes she said she’d bring by after her audition.
Fuck me!
“Cut! Perfect. Keller, that was phenomenal. It looked like you really didn’t want her to touch you. I want to check the take, and we can go again if we need to, but I think it’s perfect. Let’s wrap for lunch.”
My teeth are clenched so tight that I think you’ll need a crowbar to get them apart. Shannon pivots on her heels without another word and heads over to the food table. She grabs a bottle of water and takes small sips, placing the bottle to the back of her neck. She raises a hand to her head, and it looks like she’s breaking out into a sweat. I’m not surprised; it is hot in here.
My gaze flits to Maddie, who is staring at Shannon, a look of concern on her face, so I turn to face Shannon again.
She lifts the bottle to her lips one more time but sways before it reaches her mouth, and the next thing I know she’s on the floor.
Maddie gasps and runs over to her, placing the basket beside her so fast it tips and the cupcakes roll onto the floor.
Drop Beat (The Heartbeat Series Book 2) Page 15