The Sinner Within (L.A. Sinners MC Book 1)

by J. L. Leslie

  She doesn’t answer, and I don’t need her to. I get it now. This club she’s a part of wants retaliation for the Hades Riders. They took our supplier and now they tried to stop us from getting a new one. They pretty much succeeded. They did get both of our trucks and managed to seriously wound Hatcher in the process. I had no idea they had a second team, but then again, I had no idea our product was in danger in the first place. Of course, Wakeford won’t give a shit about his product because it’s paid for, but he’ll want his trucks back. We’re the ones who need the product.

  “Would you have gone through with it, Harper?” I ask her. “Could you have killed me?”

  “I thought for a while that I could have,” she answers. “But no. I couldn’t go through with it.”

  “What changed?”

  She leans forward a little. “You, Lucien. You changed things. Why didn’t you kill me earlier tonight? You had the chance.”

  I shake my head. “I could never hurt you.”

  I snake my arm around her waist, pulling her to me. I lower my mouth to hers and capture her lips. She sighs against me, and I lift her in my arms, loving how she wraps her legs around my waist. I head down the hall to her room, unable to talk anymore. We’ll finish the conversation later.

  “You know, my club thinks you’re going to kill me,” she says when I move my mouth down her neck.

  “Mine will want answers for the stolen truck, and they’ll want retaliation,” I tell her, tugging on her earlobe with my teeth. “We’ll figure things out.”

  “We are so wrong for each other,” she mumbles when I drop her onto the bed and start pulling off her clothes.

  “But so fucking right,” I shoot back. “Haven’t we talked about this before?”

  She laughs while I undress, sitting up on the side of the bed. I’m kicking my jeans off when her mouth wraps around my cock. She licks my dick, cupping my balls with her hand. I fists my hands in her hair and guide her mouth up and down. She takes me to the back of her throat, gagging just slightly, before I pull back out to the tip.

  “Take it all, Harper,” I encourage her. “Let me fuck that beautiful mouth of yours.”

  Her hands move from my balls to my hips as she bobs on my cock. I fuck her mouth, sliding my dick in and out until I’m on the brink of coming. I’d love to shoot my release down her throat, but I’d rather be inside her pussy for that, so I ease out of her mouth and lie her back on the bed.

  Harper licks her lips as she spreads her legs apart for me. I line my cock at her entrance and watch the tip slide inside her. I tease her a little, only pushing a couple of inches in until she’s writhing and begging.

  “Please, Lucien, I need this. I need you,” she pleads. I push in a bit farther, and she bites her lip. “Please...yes.”

  I fill her completely, moving slowly in and out of her. I hold her leg over my hip so I can fuck her deep. I want to fuck her hard, take my pleasure and punish her for what she did tonight, but I don’t. I grind into her, making sure I’m rubbing her clit with each thrust, wanting her to feel good as we fuck. Wanting this to be all about her. Wanting her to know how I feel about her.

  “I love you,” she murmurs, her nails digging into my back. “I love you, Lucien.”

  Her body shudders with her release and I drive into her, chasing mine. My cum shoots out in hot rivets, and she wraps her legs tightly around me, taking me in and holding me to her.

  My phone is ringing from the kitchen. I can hear it from here, but I ignore it. I know I’ll have questions to answer and I’ll deal with them later. For now, this is what I need.

  She’s all I need.

  Harper

  I check in with Mackenzie, who wasn’t at all surprised I was still alive. She said when Lucien called her to get Layla, she figured that he let me live. Donia also called her and told her to talk to me about where my loyalty lies and let her know she put my house under watch. I suppose that’s a good thing that Hell’s Fury wasn’t just going to allow me to be killed by the Sinners. After my conversation with Donia, I figured they would be cutting ties with me.

  Now, I’m standing in my kitchen and munching on some peanut butter. I was in the mood for some comfort food after everything that happened, and a spoonful of peanut butter is hitting the spot.

  Shortly after we got out of bed, we showered, and Lucien has been on his phone since. I have no idea who he’s talking to or what about. I don’t want to know and admitting that to myself feels pretty good. I try to convince myself that I can be the old lady that does not need to know club business.

  “Peanut butter straight from the jar?” Lucien asks, joining me in the kitchen.

  “Damn right,” I grin, licking the spoon.

  He laughs, and I can tell although he’s laughing that he’s worried about something. “What’s wrong?”

  “Hatcher is in the hospital,” he admits. “And I lied to my club. To protect you, I lied to them.”

  I shouldn’t be happy about that, but I am. He chose me when he could have chosen his club. I didn’t know how he would explain me to them, my club and what we did, but he chose not to. For now.

  “Maybe you should tell them the truth. Tell them who I am and what I did. They are going to find out eventually, and they should hear it from you. We can’t stay in hiding forever.”

  “They don’t take betrayal very lightly,” he answers.

  “You understood.”

  “Yeah,” he laughs. “And I’ve been fucking you.”

  “I could explain it to them. I don’t mind. If I’m going to be your old lady, they should trust me.”

  “You’re in a rival club, Harper. A club that stole from us. I believe you’ve seen on the news what happens to people who do that. Trusting you is not an option.”

  It pains me to hear that from him, but I deserve it. He let me get close to him, allowed me into his clubhouse, and I was lying to him the entire time. I don’t know that I could forgive him if the tables were turned.

  “I hope that will change one day. That I can show you and the Sinners the reason I did what I did.”

  “It won’t change the fact that you did it, but we’ll worry about that later. I need some time to figure this shit out. I do need to get Wakeford’s trucks back, so if there’s any chance you can talk to your president about that, then I need you to. I can meet with him and try to smooth this out.”

  I swallow down the peanut butter in my mouth. “Her. And I don’t know that she’ll go for that.”

  “Her?” he arches an eyebrow.

  “Yes,” I answer. “I’ll try to set something up. How long do we have?”

  His jaw clenches. “I will hold back, but I’m only giving you until tomorrow morning, Harper. If she refuses to meet, I have to do what’s necessary to get my trucks back. We need that product.”

  I swallow hard. “I don’t want anyone else hurt.”

  “Your club attacked mine, not the other way around,” he says, clearly frustrated. I don’t blame him because it’s the truth, but in our eyes, they attacked us first, and their attack took a hell of a lot more from us than a couple of trucks.

  “I know that.”

  “And if we’re going to be together, I need to know that the things I tell you stay between us. No more running off to share my fucking business anymore. No more running off to them period.”

  “I didn’t tell them everything I knew,” I admit. “But I understand why you would think that.”

  “This includes Mackenzie,” he says. “You are either in this with me or in it with them. You cannot have it both ways. From here on out, my club business is off limits to you, and your club shit is over. Tell your president that.”

  “Wait. Are you asking me to choose between you and my club?” I ask him.

  “If this were a perfect world, Harper, you could have both, but it’s not. There’s no way in hell my old lady is going to be a member of a rival club. It’s not fucking happening.”

  I shake my head. “So, bei
ng in this with you means I am turning my back on a family that took me in when I had no one? My parents aren’t around here, and Gavin was all I had. This club took me in and gave me hope that I could make a difference. Sure, things did not go like I thought they would, but I don’t want to choose sides. How can I possibly do that? You’re asking me to step aside and let you kill them the way your club killed the Hades Riders.”

  Last night, I thought I was out of the club, but when I found out they were still looking out for me, it made me realize that we are a family. Families argue and fight, endure loss, but they stick together.

  “I don’t want it to come to that, but Harper, you have to understand that this club, whoever they are, they know what they’re doing. They are knowingly putting themselves in danger, just as you did. Do you have any idea what would have happened to you had it not been me in that truck? You say you don’t want to choose sides, but it’s impossible for you not to.”

  I hop off the counter and toss my spoon in the sink before closing my jar of peanut butter. “I’m not leaving the club unless they kick me out. I can’t turn my back on them, Lucien.”

  He growls in frustration. “I need to know you have my back, Harper! That you are with me!”

  “And I need to know that you have my back, Lucien, or did you not hear me tell you that I love you?” I raise my voice. “I don’t say that to just anyone, so you can decide if you want all of me, as I am with all of my shit, or if you want to walk away from me. I gave you that option before.”

  “Why are you so damn stubborn?” he grumbles, gathering me in his arms.

  I let him hug me, wrapping my arms around his neck. “They’re my family, Lucien. I don’t know how to walk away from them.”

  “Fuck me because I don’t know how to walk away from you.”

  God, I don’t want him to.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Lucien

  I’m exhausted when Harper and I pull up at the clubhouse. We spent the rest of the night talking, trying to figure out what the hell to do about this club she’s in. She didn’t divulge much about it. Most of it I put together, figuring out that the club is mostly, if not all, women who are family members of the Hades Riders. Harco had already found some of them in the L.A. area. I am the one who hasn’t made time to reach out like I said I would.

  Apparently, they banded together to start their own club, desperate for revenge against their fallen loved ones. They’ve been extremely smart about it too. I know the Sicarios don’t know about them. Who would suspect an all-female motorcycle club? I sure as hell didn’t.

  They have been flying under the radar, making moves against us since Ford was president. They monopolized our supplier, giving Jiminez protection from the DEA through Mackenzie. Snatched up our buyers when we had no product to sell and even managed to secure the governor Warren was bringing in as a buyer as well.

  Somehow, they found out about our connection with Wakeford & Sons, although Harper assured me she did not provide her president with that intel. Said her president knew about our new supplier before she knew. She did admit to telling them we were getting our trucks though. We lost both of those trucks, thanks to her.

  I’ll do what I have to in order to get them back. If it means the destruction of Harper’s club, then so be it. For now, I have bigger things to worry about. The attack against Jiminez is still on tonight. Another important piece of intel that Harper assured me she did not share.

  “It’s about fucking time you got here!” Reid yells when I get off my bike. “You and that bitch have some explaining to do!”

  “Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” I ask him, starting in his direction.

  “He knows, Lucien,” Harper says.

  “Shut up, Harper!” I yell, unsure how in the hell Reid would know anything unless he heard me say Harper’s name last night.

  “You damn right I know!” Reid shouts.

  “Get the fuck inside and tell everyone we’re having an emergency church session! Bring Warren and Ian in too!”

  “Lucien, let me talk to them,” Harper pleads.

  “You stay the fuck out here,” I order her and head inside to address my members before Reid runs his mouth.

  He’s mouthing off when I get inside, going on about how it’s my fault that we lost the trucks. That I’m pussy-whipped. I go straight to him, catching him by the throat and pinning him to the wall.

  “I’m sorry, do you fucking hold these meetings or do I?” I ask him.

  “You!” he chokes out, and I shove him down to the floor.

  I face the Sinners. “Does anyone here believe I’m not capable of running this damn club? Because that issue can be resolved if one of you fuckers want to challenge me for my position.” I don’t see any hands go up. I don’t hear anyone speak out against me. “Now that we’ve settled that, I found out who pulled the job on our trucks. It was Harper.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” Warren says amongst the grumbling of the Sinners.

  I knew they would not take it well and I can see it on their faces that although they’re confused by her actions, they want her dead. We have never allowed anyone to steal from us and get away with it.

  “She’s a member of the club that is aligned with Jiminez. From what I gather, they are linked with the Hades Riders and are seeking retaliation for their deaths. Deaths at the hands of our club.”

  “We all know what we do to rival clubs,” Reid says. “She is no different!”

  “She’s my old lady and is not to be harmed!” I warn them, eyeing each of them and daring them to say otherwise.

  “Fucking bullshit!” Wiggie shouts. “Those families are long gone! What is this club she’s in?”

  “We thought the families were gone, but they aren’t. Harco found some photos and some of them are here in L.A. As for the club, Harper doesn’t want to betray them, so she hasn’t told me who they are, but she’s going to try to set up a meeting with her president, and I’ll talk with her about our trucks.”

  “Oh, so she’s just betrayed you then? And fucked us all over!” Soco yells, and I see the door open.

  Harper walks inside looking somewhat nervous, but with her head held high. The Sinners glare at her, hatred for the woman they believe betrayed us clear on their faces. If I gave them the word, they would treat her like everyone else who wronged us.

  Harper stares them down then looks to me and answers, “Hell’s Fury. That’s the club I’m in, and my president is willing to meet with you tomorrow morning to discuss your stolen trucks and product.”

  I nod at her. “I’ll meet with her and make arrangements to get the trucks back,” I assure the Sinners, doing my fucking best to calm them down. “Ian, please escort Harper back outside. She is not allowed to hear club business.”

  “Yeah, take her outside! She isn’t Spencer, although she’s a dead fucking ringer for her!” Reid calls out.

  I mumble a curse. “Shut the fuck up, Reid!”

  “What’s he talking about, Lucien?” Harper asks me.

  “Ian, do your job,” I instruct, and he takes her by the arm, leading her out of the clubhouse.

  I need to keep my men under control, and I need them to trust me. I just dropped a fucking bombshell on them, and they are reeling from it. Still, I can’t continue to let Reid disrespect me.

  “Reid, if you have a problem with how I’m handling this club, like I said, you are welcome to challenge me for the title of president,” I state, and he stiffens. “If you are too much of a pussy to do that, then I suggest you shut your fucking mouth before I shut it for you. You do not speak unless you are spoken to. Do you understand?”

  He crosses his arms, glaring at me. “Yes, sir.”

  “We are still moving forward with tonight’s plans. I know you’re all pissed about the trucks and about Hatcher being injured. I will get them back and this club, Hell’s Fury, has already paid retribution for Hatcher. They lost a member last night,” I explain. “I am a
sking you to trust me the same way I asked you to trust me when I stepped into this role as president. Harper is Gavin Mason’s half-sister. She has put her trust and loyalty in a club that promised her retaliation for the club who killed her brother. We are the club that did that, burned him alive, so that promise was something she wanted. If any of you were in her position, you would have wanted the same thing.”

  It takes a few minutes, but eventually, Harco steps forward. “I can move past it. Ford did some fucked up shit to those men, so I get it. She should’ve been honest about it but fuck it. I like her if you like her, boss.”

  “I still have nightmares about what we did to those fucking men,” Soco says, shaking his head. “The stuff Ford wanted done to them, displaying them like that, was fucked, but I don’t trust her. We need to know more about this club, see if we’re going to have a problem with them. Fuck, more of a problem with them.”

  Reid is still fuming, but he doesn’t say a word. I can tell a few others share his sentiment, but none of them challenge me. They know what was done to the Riders was unforgivable and any family capable of gaining retribution for the deaths would want it.

  “If we are finished with this discussion, let’s go over the plans for tonight. We are taking one hell of a risk and need to be prepared.”

  Harper

  I’m desperate to march back in there and demand answers, but what good would that do me? It would undermine Lucien in front of his club, and I can’t do that to him despite how badly I want to know what Reid meant.

  Who is Spencer and why did he say I was a dead ringer for her? Is she Lucien’s ex? I kick a rock on the ground and huff out a sigh.

  “They must be having church, and you got kicked out of the clubhouse,” Leann comments, walking by with her hands full of potted plants.

  She motions for me to follow her and I do. I take one of the plants to ease her load, and together we walk to what looks to be a garden. It’s several yards behind the gym.